XII. Brave
I know that you're afraid
You know that I'm afraid, too
But you got to have faith
You just got to let it be;
Like you and me; you and me
We can be strong in each other's arms
And I'll be brave, I'll be brave for you
-Pat Benatar
An ambulance didn't arrive until some five hours after Ginger gave birth to baby Abe; she and Chase were taken to the nearest hospital. (Gabriel teleported Dottie to be with them.) Because of the circumstances, Ginger and the baby were kept at the hospital for two days before being sent home where everyone was waiting to greet her and the newest addition of the family. And once little Abe was put to a nap, Rowan insisted on a group hug between the guys (which they did, but not without grimaces and complaints). It was the first group hug of Chase's life.
The following week was chaotic. The media was clamoring to speak to Ward Jaocby's latest stalking and potential murder victim, but Chase was barring all access to her. It did not stop the phone from ringing or bodies with cameras lingering distantly just off the cusp of their property. It helped when Atticus Crane (lawyer to the Families) swept in, surprising the Collins on their doorstep.
"Who you are?" Chase questioned.
"My name is Atticus Crane," the older man replied. "The Cranes have been legal advisors to the Families for generations." He set his briefcase on the kitchen table where he'd been escorted. Atticus was tall, slim, black haired with gray-white streaks (natural) at the temples. He resembled Vincent Price. "If you do not wish for my services I can-"
Ginger and Chase who'd been listening followed Crane's eyes. Dottie had just entered the kitchen.
"This is Dottie," Ginger introduced while holding Abe. "She's family."
Atticus Crane remained silent for a beat.
"And she knows about the Families," Chase added.
"Ah!" Atticus Crane chuckled. "I thought I was losing my touch for a moment." He shook Dottie's hand, re-introduced himself. "As I was saying, the trial of Ward Jacoby will be a media-storm, and although you are not on trial it would still be wise to have legal counsel to run interference between you and those vultures." He gestured towards the outside.
"Oh, thank goodness," Dottie said. "How did they even get this number? It rings constantly, and disturbs the baby." She smiled at Ginger. "How's he doing? Ready for a nap?"
"I think he is," Ginger replied. "Would you mind, Dottie?"
"Not at all, dumplin'." She carefully took the baby. "You all chat business, I'll take care of little Abe." There were no words for how touched she was that they had named the baby after her late husband Abraham.
A moment later Ginger, Chase and Atticus Crane re-seated themselves at the table. Chase remembered Caleb mentioning this guy once or twice. Atticus Crane had two sons who'd followed in his footsteps; the eldest Crane was predominately retired but stepped in during times like these. Chase wouldn't mind someone running interference with the press; this was exactly why he wanted to remain anonymous as a published author. Interviews, cameras flashing constantly, no thank you.
"Now, have the police contacted you?" Atticus questioned.
Chase nodded. "The day before we left the hospital Ginger gave a short statement to them. I know they've spoken to the other guys."
Atticus Crane jotted down some notes with his fountain pen. "Yes, the other Sons have their stories straight completely." The story as to how they'd found Ginger so easily was that Ward Jacoby had taken Ginger's cell phone and had not factored in that the phone contained GPS tracking. "Luckily, Mr. Jacoby's deeds are so heinous and long un-addressed that I do not believe that will be much of an issue." He asked Ginger, "Would you like me to be present when you give a detailed account to the authorities?"
Ginger looked at Chase. She was still rather shaken up from the entire ordeal. She couldn't deny that there were some nightmares and trouble sleeping, but she was glad the worst was over. Ward Jacoby would never touch her again.
"We think that would be good," Ginger replied.
Crane nodded. "Then, would you mind telling it to me, from the beginning?" He had compassionate, deep eyes, patient and wise.
Chase took Ginger's hand comfortingly. "Whenever you want."
Ginger took a breath. "Okay."
xx
"Oh, something smells good," Reid drawled as he walked into the kitchen, Luke just having been put down in his crib.
"Spaghetti sauce," Rowan said. She held the wooden spoon over the pot. "Taste." Her husband leaned forward, and she brought the utensil to his mouth. He let out a little groan. "Good? I was afraid I lost my touch." She hadn't cooked a thorough meal in a few months what with being sick and pregnant.
"You could never lose your touch for cooking, Row," he said. "It's in your blood."
She smiled at him. "It'll be ready soon. Can you mix the salad?"
Together they made the rest of dinner. He applied the garlic sauce to the bread, set out the plates and forks. This was their first real meal together, just the two of them, in a while. Reid was glad seeing her so vibrant and energetic, and he couldn't lie and say he hadn't missed her cooking.
They sat at the table enjoying the food and companionable silence, only interrupted when Erwin came downstairs to go outside and relieve himself, then came back in and right upstairs to Luke's room again. Reid watched the dog go with some surprise. It wasn't like Erwin to not do a routine can-I-have-some-human-food stare. That was something to get used to, he thought, shaking his head a little and returning to his meal.
Rowan peeked him at him through her long lashes. Maybe tonight they would make love. Good food could put Reid into the mood, usually for a languorous bout of love-making. They probably needed to ease back into it. It was near closing in on five months since they'd last made love, definitely the longest they'd gone without. The doctor had said it was okay for them to resume their sex life, and Rowan saw no reason why they should wait. She missed making love with her husband, those spontaneous times when he would look at her, she at him, and then she'd find herself being held up against the wall with Reid inside of her.
Or showers that took longer than usual because they got sidetracked. Or just hours rolling around in bed, deep under the covers. Rowan had expected (after Luke was asleep) Reid to make love to her after getting home from Jeffrey's cabin, but he had not. He had kissed her long, held her, thankful that she was safe and well, but…no sex. Reid had stopped before he'd gotten too overwhelmed.
Rowan knew his body, like he knew hers, and she knew he had wanted to. It was in his eyes, every ripple of muscle, every breath. His aura was steamy with want. But Rowan hadn't pushed when he just held her later.
"Ginger called and said that Mr. Crane visited them today," Rowan said.
"Oh, yeah? Chase accept his legal counsel?"
Rowan nodded. "I'm glad they did. It'll make the technical side of this whole thing easier for them, especially Ginger."
They lapsed back into comfortable silence; Rowan continued to think about Jeffrey and Ginger. He was being remanded without bail, and officials were still trying to decide which state to try him in. Caleb said that Massachusetts would likely win out because Josephine Dwyer, Jeffrey's first victim, was from here. Jeffrey already had a star criminal defense attorney who was going to plead insanity. Not-guilty wouldn't do. At the cabin, the police had found a wealth of trophies and news clippings Jeffrey kept on his victims, including several albums. There was no denying his culpability.
"Row?" Reid was looking at her. He noticed her quiet had gone from contemplative to troublesome. It took a moment for him to get his wife's attention. "You okay?"
"Yeah." She tried to smile and was mildly successful. "I never said how good you were with Chase."
"Me?" Reid tried to brush it off.
She chuckled. "Yes." She reached across the table to take his hand. "I know forgives-and-forgets aren't really your thing, but I'm proud of you."
He half-smirked. What did it say about him, a grown man, that his wife's feeling proud of his conduct could make him feel like he'd just conquered Everest? They finished dinner; Reid told her he would do the dishes so she went upstairs to check on the baby, furry animals, and then freshen up.
The mood was set.
xx
Tyler drove carefully home after a particularly long day at work. He enjoyed what he did, he liked helping people, yet it could take an emotional toll, but the youngest Ipswich Son felt he dealt with it well enough. Growing up with Rowan had fortified him in dealing with sick people in a good way. And Tyler knew he shouldn't get so close to his patients, but when they were regulars it was difficult not to.
An hour after leaving the hospital he pulled up in his driveway that he'd shoveled the day before. The front porch light came on and he saw the door swing open just as he exited his car. He hugged and kissed Maria when he walked in, shuffling her away from the cold and locking the door behind them. He was comforted by her warmth already.
"Are you hungry?" she asked. "I'm sorry I didn't make dinner, I got caught up with another piece. But there are leftovers."
"Ah, no I'm not hungry, sweetheart," he replied. "I think I'll go take a shower."
She was waiting for him in the bedroom with a tray of food anyway. Maria knew him too well. She didn't even have to say that she knew he probably hadn't eaten anything but a granola bar or cup of yogurt since lunch. Tyler could get just as caught up in his work as Maria could with her art.
"Thank you."
Maria pecked him on the lips. They normally ate at the kitchen table, but Tyler seemed a little dejected and he sat on the bed and picked at his food. Maria sat cross-legged next to him with her hands rested on her ever-burgeoning tummy.
"What's wrong Ty?" she asked softly, reaching out to lightly caress the short curls at his temple.
The mashed potatoes clumped in his mouth and he had a hard time swallowing. His wife was always attentive to him and to whatever issues he was having at work. She was his number one confidante, his sounding board, his everything.
"Jesus is not going to make it. The treatment didn't work."
A small intake of breath sounded from her. "Oh, Tyler, I'm so sorry."
Jesus was a five year old who had been going through chemotherapy for leukemia. His parents had tried everything, but apparently it had not worked. The child was getting worse, and death was inevitable. He likely had a year at the most. Tyler had become invested in the young boy's care, and this was hitting home.
He nodded, put on a brave face for her, for himself. "His mother is beside herself. Jesus' dad was never very demonstrative, but I can tell this is hitting him hard. I just wish…" Tyler sighed, shrugged.
"You did everything you could, Tyler," she comforted. Maria could say nothing more. She believed her husband had given his all and more. But sometimes medicine could only go so far. She squeezed his hand.
"Do you know how grateful I am that you and the baby are so healthy?" he said.
Maria sidled over (unable to bend forward to hug him) to take him in her arms.
Tyler wouldn't know what to do if he lost Maria. And he couldn't wait for his son to be born at the beginning of January. Because he was not a licensed pediatric oncologist yet (four more years) he worked with more than just cancer patients. Whenever a new child was born, or a healthy child came in and continued to flourish, he knew he was in the right profession. Helping to deliver Ginger and Chase's child was a high point for him. Being able to hand over a healthy baby was incredible.
Changing the subject, Tyler said, "How are you today? Are your feet still hurting?"
"No. The massage oil Rowan made worked wonders," she replied.
He smiled. "When's our first Lamaze class?" He wanted to know ahead of time so he could get the time off.
"Two weeks," she said, grinning. "And Pinkie and I are getting invitations together for the baby shower. Having it before the holidays get into full swing would be best. Christmas makes things so hectic."
Not to mention her parents were coming for the last week of December to be here when the baby was born. They had most everything the baby needed, the nursery was finished; now all they were waiting for was the baby, Alexander Ian Simms.
They went to bed a couple of hours later after gentle love-making. Maria still had the urge; it wasn't uncommon for her to prod him awake very early in the morning, whispering her nickname for him since they'd first begun dating, 'Tyler Bear.' There was never any mistaking that it was her. She was his constant.
xx
Judy Danvers groaned, closed one of her many case folders and rubbed her eyes. It was eleven and she'd just finished putting the final touches on a recently closed case. Neither she nor Caleb had lessened their workload, but Judy could feel herself getting tired more easily at a little more than six months pregnant. So far there were no health glitches. The doctor was glad with how she and the baby were progressing, and she carried the sonogram picture with her in her wallet, and Caleb had one on his desk at work.
"Hey, are you coming to bed, sweetheart?" Caleb entered the study that was once his father's but now he and Judy shared it, it was certainly big enough.
She smiled tiredly at him. "Yeah, I just finished."
Caleb was a little worried, thinking that his wife shouldn't be working so late and long right now. But if the doctor didn't have any qualms about it, Caleb couldn't really say anything. Judy got up, and turned out the lights. Caleb made her some tea while she went upstairs to change into a sleeveless cotton nightgown. Luckily for her, Laurie, Pinkie's boyfriend, was a personal shopper; or the personal shopper as the half-fairy liked to say. If there was an award for best-dressed couple, it would definitely go to Pinkie and Laurie.
Her maternity clothes were stylish and not frumpy, not that Judy was ever overly obsessed with her appearance, but she knew in her profession it was important to continue to look, well, professional, capable. She didn't want to appear weak, or have others thinking she would begin to slack off just because she was pregnant. Judy could handle her workload, and she would with no complaint. Deep down though, she did feel insecure about her appearance.
The increasing weight gain (with good reason), the protruding stomach, it was familiar with her adolescence. When she was a very young child, her older brother Wesley had been abducted. It had nearly destroyed her parents, and the house became quiet with their loss. So as Judy got older, she'd filled that silence with food. Cliché, but true. It wasn't until her senior year of high school that she'd burned the weight off due to a summer spent with her active aunt in Colorado.
So sometimes those insecurities popped up. That little fat girl inside of her. It did not make her regret her pregnancy though, no, she was happy with that, and loved the look on Caleb's face when they talked about their son. And her parents couldn't wait to hold their first grandchild. After Wesley died Judy was all they had, so they'd put all their hopes and dreams into her, wanting nothing but the best for their remaining child.
"Judy." Caleb walked to her.
She was broken out of her reverie, realizing that she'd been standing by the window, staring out at the snowy garden.
"Are you all right?" he asked.
"Mmm-hmm," she answered. "Thank you." She accepted the steaming cup of tea, inhaled the soothing vapors. Caleb told her to sit down, and they sat opposite each other on cushy chairs.
Gently, he took one of her bare feet and the special oil his sister had made and began to massage it into Judy's feet. Judy gave a little groan of pleasure and relaxed. He looked at her, how beautiful she was with her thick red hair, fair complexion, full strawberry lips, and hazel eyes.
"Are you thinking about decreasing your work load?" Caleb broached the subject carefully.
Her brow rose slightly. "I'm fine, Caleb, really." Pause, then, "The case against Jeffrey is becoming crazy. Trenton is chomping at the bit to prosecute."
Caleb half-smirked. Trenton was an 'up-and-coming' assistant district attorney, and had no life other than the job (unless you counted the many dalliances he partook in). He was ruthless, a braggart, but no one could deny he was good at what he did.
"He was worried you would get it," she said.
He chuckled at this. "Too bad, conflict of interest, considering I was there." If this case actually went to trial, he would likely be called as a witness. He'd given his statement so many times it came out like rote. "He'll probably get it though." And he bore Trenton no grudge. Jeffrey's, or Ward Jacoby's case was getting more and more bizarre. He was being charged with multiple counts of murder, including those of some of the women's unborn children.
Ward Jacoby had gotten a bombastic defense attorney, popular, grandiose, loved the media attention. Dayton Bass. Shark.
"Hmm," Judy sounded as Caleb switched to the other foot. Thank goodness for her sister-in-law's magic poultices.
"Ready for bed?" Caleb said.
Her eyes opened languidly. "Very much."
xx
It hadn't worked, and Rowan was mind-boggled, and worried. It was one of those perfect moments for her and Reid to make love, but once they got to that Point, he'd stopped, held her. She'd said his name inquiringly, and he had said he was tired. Tired. Just tired. Never in their years together had he used that excuse. Rowan always could tell when he was tired, and those times she was always more than content to just cuddle. Last night had been…avoidance.
It hurt. And his mind was closed off from hers, making her unable to detect what was bothering him. Was it her body? The changes bearing Luke had made? She was already back to her normal size, and because she had more energy, she was able to start running again. Her stomach was nearly back to its firmness.
In the nursery, Lucius was suckling as she stared out the window. She saw Erwin run to his tree, do his business, then he disappeared back into the house. Moments later she heard him ascending the stairs, nails clacking on the hardwood floors of the hall; he entered panting and came to sit next to the rocking chair with Tippy and Bruce Lee.
Reid was out at a meeting with the manager of Beans. Rowan could tell that despite last night, he was still hesitant about leaving both her and the baby. Neither had been away from Luke for more than an hour since he'd been born. Pretty soon she would be able to resume her Whitelighter duties, and maybe she would feel comfortable with going back to work soon, too. Perhaps next year.
She sighed. Rowan felt a slight tingle, and Hunter appeared.
"Hey," he said. He kissed her on the cheek and pulled up a chair.
"Hi," she grinned at him as best she could. Breast feeding Luke in front of Hunter wasn't an issue for either of them.
"Hey, little man," he said, smiling at the baby, taking his small hand. The baby's eyes glittered with interest. "He's got that mischievous Reid-look in his eyes." That served to make Rowan chuckle.
Hunter looked at her closely. She was concerned about something.
"Did Reid call you to come over here?" she asked.
"Ah, damn, you know the both of us too well." No point in hiding the truth from her. Reid had called to ask him to keep Rowan company. And Hunter had caught the strained tone in his friend's voice. What was going on he didn't know. But he never liked to see Rowan sad, or his family conflicted.
"Not Reid so much these days," she said quietly.
His brow furrowed.
Big brown eyes locked on his sadly. "Last night. He didn't want to make love." Pause, then, "He said he was too tired." She stifled troubled laughter. "That's never happened before, ever. Is it me?" She bit her bottom lip, trying to keep from crying. "I know…my body's changed some…"
He shook his head.
"Maybe there's something about my being a mother he doesn't like."
"Ah, Row…"
A tear escaped and ran down her cheek. Luke sensed his mother's distress and stopped suckling with a discontented mewl.
"Oh, I'm sorry, honey," Rowan crooned. "I didn't mean to cry."
She resituated her clothing and Luke so she could burp him, finding comfort in his warmth. "Sorry, Hunter, I didn't mean to…"
"Come here." He put his arm around her shoulder and she let her head lean against him.
"I'm worried about Reid," she confessed quietly. "I don't know what to do."
xx
"Expansion," Reid said to the manager, Ben.
"I thought you didn't want to expand. That's why you bought the place," the older man said, worried.
Reid shook his head. "Not like that. I don't mean starting a chain of Beans. Just making more room. See, I noticed when Rowan was pregnant that there aren't many comfortable places for women with babies to sit. I mean, they don't want to sit on a hard chair, but a comfortable couch or something." Ben was nodding along, having some kids himself. "We could knock out a wall, and put a section with maybe two couches, two chairs. Something homey."
They were sitting at a window seat in Beans, the customers were taken care of, two employees were taking care of the odds and ends for the moment.
Ben glanced around the place. "I can see that. That's a good idea."
Reid half-smiled, took a sip of his coffee that was becoming tepid. It was snowing again; he'd been away from Rowan and Luke for an hour and a half. Already he was missing them. He wanted to kiss Rowan and hold his son.
Last night had been… He shook the memory away.
"We'll need contractors," Ben said.
"I'll arrange it, get back to you. See what times are best. We could probably have it done before Christmas."
The manager smiled wide. "I got to tell you, I had my doubts about the change of ownership, but I'm glad you made the offer. We'd have lost Beans if you hadn't."
"Hey, you gave me my first job," Reid replied. "I couldn't let this place become some snooty hang out."
Twenty minutes later Reid was on his way back home; kind of anxious. Could he look Rowan in the eyes? Rebuffing her as gently as possible last night… One of the hardest things he'd had to do. His body wanted to, definitely, but his mind? There were so many worries bouncing around in his head. It was difficult to sort them out. But he'd seen the brief flash of hurt in his wife's eyes when he had told her he was too tired, then the confusion. Reid didn't blame her. Never had he turned away from her like that.
He sighed heavily.
When he finally got home the place was quiet. Erwin loped into the foyer, picking up speed to greet his human.
"Hi, boy," Reid said, scratching him behind the ears. "Take good care of everybody?"
The German shepherd wagged his tail vigorously.
"Hey, Reid," Hunter greeted, meeting him halfway from the hall, having come from the TV room.
"How's everything?" the blonde asked, doing the guy-handshake.
"Good." Hunter's eyes involuntarily flicked towards the stairs.
"Is Rowan okay?" Reid questioned. "Luke?"
"Oh, yeah, yeah, they're fine. Luke's down for a nap, then Ginger called, they talked for a bit, and Rowan went to rest herself."
"Was she feeling all right? Sick? Fever?" He was heading upstairs already.
"No."
Reid passed their bedroom first. Rowan was sound asleep with the baby monitor in her hand, Tippy curled up in her arm. Reid then checked on Luke who was also snoozing. Bruce Lee was on his back in his ferret hammock, barely astir. Reid ran his hand through his hair which was slightly damp from the melted snowflakes.
"Row made you a sandwich in case all you had was coffee," Hunter told him quietly so as not to wake anybody.
The two men went back downstairs. Erwin stayed in the nursery. Reid didn't think he could eat anything, even though he had only consumed a muffin and coffee at Beans.
"You sure she was okay?" Reid inquired again.
Hunter hesitated. "Physically, yeah," he answered after a moment. Normally he wouldn't butt in marital affairs, but he wasn't going to lie. It was troubling Rowan enough that she'd had to lay down. "Is something…going on, dude?"
Reid stared at him, then it was as if something in him deflated. He sunk on the couch, head in his hands. "She tell you?"
Hunter sat across from him. "A little."
"I can't tell her what I…" Reid shook his head, cleared his throat.
The telekinetic Shepherd remained silent. He saw all the stress of the passed several months flash across Reid's face. The weight on his shoulders.
"Remember Lucius?" the blonde finally spoke. "Row's mentor?"
He nodded. "Yeah."
More quiet. "When Luke was born, after, when I went to the neonate ward? I put on all that protection. My hands were in the holes." Seeing his son there, in that plastic incubator, hooked up to that beeping equipment, it wasn't what a first meeting between father and son should be. "I was thinking…Rowan was still asleep, her condition was critical." He licked his dry lips, rubbed his eyes, which subsequently flashed and the hearth lit up.
"I thought something that I shouldn't have, Hunt," Reid confessed, distress apparent in his blue eyes. "I was looking down at Luke and…I thought… I thought how I couldn't be a dad without Rowan." He shrugged helplessly. "And I… I didn't want to be a dad without…" He couldn't finish his sentence.
Hunter understood where Reid was going.
"Then everything froze." Reid's voice became more stable. "It was just me, surrounded by nothing. And there was this voice, a guy. I couldn't see a face, but somehow I knew it was Lucius. I don't know why. And he said… He said I would be a dad with Rowan but…I wouldn't…Rowan wouldn't…survive another pregnancy."
Hunter's eyes widened in shock before it dissipated, he wasn't easily taken off guard. This was the last thing he had expected to hear.
"At first I thought I was hallucinating, even after I came out of it. Then Rowan told me about her vision… Hers was true." He looked Hunter dead in the eye. "I know mine is too."
"This is why you've been distant?" Hunter asked somewhat rhetorically.
"I can't risk it. I'm fucking terrified of her getting pregnant again. I know it can happen… See, I can be happy with just Luke. But Rowan grew up with a great sibling relationship with Caleb, and I know she wants that for Luke."
That explained why Reid got a deer-caught-in-the-headlights look whenever someone mentioned more children.
"Bro, you've got to tell her this," Hunter said, as Reid shook his head reflexively. "Reid…she thinks you've lost interest in her because she's a mother now."
His head snapped up. "What? No!" That was…wrong. Reid thought Rowan just got more beautiful every day.
"Deep down Rowan knows that's not it, but she's confused."
Reid's mouth opened, closed. It took a moment, but he finally said, "I made an appointment with a doctor."
"For what?"
"A, uh…vasectomy."
Hunter blinked. For the second time that day, in a fifteen minute period, he was taken off guard. A vasectomy.
"Next week," Reid continued.
"So you have a week to tell Rowan," Hunter prompted.
Reid averted his gaze. "I was hoping I could do it without her knowing." Which was stupid really. The doctor had explained the procedure. Was Rowan going to miss stitches and bruising on his testicles? "I don't think I can, can I?"
"No," he answered unnecessarily, but Reid needed to hear it.
"It's the best way," Reid said, more for himself. "Remember that dream I had a long time ago? The one when Row died in the car crash?" Hunter nodded. "You love Rowan as much as I do. Even though you have Gabe, could you still stand to lose her?"
Hunter didn't reply. No.
"Neither can I."
xx
Chase pressed SEND to the e-mail he'd just composed to his editor. Apparently someone had been sniffing around as to C.S. Gardener's true identity, and the editor suspected the single media might be on to something. He knew how much Chase valued his privacy. The eldest Son of Ipswich sighed. He did value his privacy, and he wasn't sure he wanted anyone asking about his past, which would certainly come with the revelation of the person behind the pen name.
Not to mention this thing with Ward Jacoby. Deals were being struck on an exclusive for the serial killer. True crime novels, TV appearances; of course, Mr. Jacoby couldn't profit from any of it, but Chase knew there were twisted people out there that would find some way to sympathize and martyr Ward Jacoby.
And the media wanted background on the men who had been present during Ward's capture. It was pretty easy to dig up history on the names Garwin, Danvers, Parry and Simms, but Chase was a little bit of an enigma. How someone got his school records, or pictures from high school… They were vultures, like Atticus Crane had said. Mostly he was worried that someone would find out about Ginger's stay in the psychiatric hospital. Ginger thought it would be wise to tell Crane about it, so just in case someone stumbled upon it, their lawyer wouldn't be blindsided.
She didn't want anyone to know. Chase could see the story easily being twisted against Ginger if they knew about her hospitalization. Someone could recognize her from a picture. The defense could accuse her of being unstable, somehow enabling Ward Jacoby's fantasies.
But they would have to cross that bridge when they came to it. For now, they were still remaining as inconspicuous as possible.
Chase got up, stretched, shut down his computer and turned off his light. He listened for Dottie, didn't see a light coming from under her door, so he knew she was asleep. He went upstairs quietly. Only a very dim light was lit in their bedroom. The crib was at the end of their bed; Ginger was sleeping peacefully.
He peeked over. Abe was staring up at him, wide awake in his footie pajamas and matching beanie.
"You should be asleep," Chase said oh-so quietly.
It boggled him how he could love someone so much he'd only just met a short time ago, but that was how he felt about his son. Gently, he took Abe from his crib, held his small, warm body against his chest and walked towards the window across the room. It was snowing.
"That's snow," he whispered. "Your mommy loves snow."
Abe stirred, made a cooing gurgly sound. The small head rested on his father's shoulder.
"Yeah," Chase went on. "Every winter, once there's enough snow, she makes me go out and make a snowman with her, and snow angels." He half-smiled, stroking Abe's downy hair. "Once you get big enough you'll do the same, I'm sure. And Grandma always has hot cocoa waiting."
He sat down. "You know, I'm not perfect. I don't even think I'm always good. But your mom and grandma keep me level. You won't be alone when you get your Power. You might be scared, but you'll have family. Sure, they can be a pain in the butt, especially the blonde one, but they are there for you." He kissed Abe on the head. "I'll be there for you."
xx
When Rowan had woken up earlier Hunter was gone. The day had already progressed into night. She made a light dinner for her and Reid, which they'd eaten in quiet. She nursed Luke, fed the animals, all the while wondering about Reid. She asked how his meeting with Ben had went, he said they were talking about expanding the area to make room for some couches and chairs.
All the while Reid thought about his talk with Hunter. It felt good to finally get it off his chest, but he was no less looking forward to the discussion he knew he had to have with Rowan. Could he tell her that awful thought he'd had when looking at Luke, even if it only crossed his mind for a mere moment?
So when they bedded down for the night, he'd given her a kiss on the cheek, but didn't embrace her as he normally would have. Then, in the middle of the night, he woke up, feeling the bed empty save for him and Tippy (whose tail was draped over his head). He was always aware of Rowan's absence. He got up, checked the nursery. Just a sleeping Luke and two animals. Tippy brushed passed his ankles and curled up with Erwin.
He went downstairs next. Faintly, he heard the sound of the television from the TV room. The blue light flickered in the dark.
"Hey, hey, hey," Reid's voice sounded. "She's my wife now, I can kiss her as much as I want to."
Rowan was on the couch, legs curled beneath her, watching the footage of their wedding day. Their first kiss as a married couple had gone on a little long (though it remained tasteful) and polite objection (along with some whistles) had been made. Naturally, Reid made a smart comment.
Present day Reid watched for a minute or two.
Rowan was so invested in the TV that she didn't hear Reid enter. She wasn't aware of him until he sat down next to her. And he saw her face was streaked with tears.
"Row," he said softly.
She swallowed a jagged lump, didn't look at him. Reid took her hand, squeezed. He said her name again, used his other hand to gently coax her head in his direction. Her eyes went straight to his heart.
"Tell me what it is Reid," she said in a chocked whisper. "Please."
"It's not you."
"I know. It's about us." She scooted closer so she could feel his body heat. Her hand went to the back of his neck, her thumb unconsciously caressed his nape. "Tell me, Reid."
He exhaled heavily, knowing it was now. Haltingly, he told her about Lucius. Then about what Lucius said, and that he believed it; just like she believed that Nana had come to her. "I said…I said I didn't want to be a dad without you." He choked up again, he felt tears building up. "It was only for a second, but I couldn't lose you, Row."
She was nodded, crying silently, hugged him.
"I can be happy with just Luke," he told her. "But I know you want more."
She was quiet for a moment. "I would love for Luke to have a sibling like I had Caleb. I also believe what Lucius told you. And I want to be with you and Luke as much as you want me to be here with the two of you."
"You say that now."
"No, I would say that always. I know I can be happy with only Luke. I am happy. Luke will have brothers regardless." Another hot tear fell. "Why did you wait so long to tell me?"
He shrugged. "I felt so helpless when they were rushing you to the emergency room that night. I couldn't do anything. And I can't change this."
Rowan hugged him again. "God, Reid," she let out a sob.
He told her that he would give her everything if he could, but not this. "I won't risk you."
"I know." She was sitting in his lap now, arms around his neck, forehead touching his temple. "What do we do then?"
"I made an appointment with a doctor for next week."
"For what?" She saw the answer clearly in his mind, which was now open to her, and her eyes widened. "A vasectomy? Reid…"
"I think it's the best way."
"But…you love your family jewels." They both chuckled despite the serious of the matter. Reid wiped her tears away with his thumb. "I could-"
"This is an out-patient procedure," he interrupted, knowing what she was going to say. "It's safer than you going through an invasive surgery."
The light from the television continued to illuminate them as they held each other.
"You and Lucius are always going to be more than enough for me, Reid," she said. "Don't ever think different. I love you."
Sorry for the long wait. I'll try to be quicker with my updates. I'm going to start focusing a bit more on the other three couples now, Tyler and Maria are going to have some drama. :)
Thanks for reading, always appreciated.
As a side note, somehow my 'send personal messages' thing got disabled, so if you tried to send me a PM and I didn't reply, it's because I didn't get it. Just in case.