Warning: AU –Second World War
M-Rated!Contains coarse language, violent imaginary related to the context of war, and sex.
I do not own South Park. I do not own anything. I wish I was that f* genius!
Dachau, 26 April 1945
Blank stares, racing hearts. You take a deep breath and hold my hand in yours. A sweet caress.
Silence. I cast my eyes down. I cannot face your saddened look. I cry dry tears and shut my ears, not wanting to listen to your words of doom. Silence.
The question remains open. Why did we dive so deep? We broke all rules, found forbidden happiness, but now we face the end. Is this goodbye for good?
I wish time didn't exist, wish this moment would persist, wish we could stay frozen in time. Together forever in the brink of separation. But wishing is all I can do. Your hand leaves mine and as I walk away my heart breaks, shatters into thousands of pieces.
Is this the final goodbye?
I betray myself the moment I turn around to look at you. I cannot resist. I need to see your beautiful face one last time. Mesmerize each line, each trace. Shit, I don't even have a picture from you with me! Your face is dry but your eyes are watery. Just like mine. Fuck emotions. I hate them! They suck, they sting, they hurt too much! But then I see determination in your green gaze. A knowing grin. And an encouraging nod. I sense my lips draw up in a smile. And I just know I will see you again. We will be reunited one day, someway.
Still, leaving Dachau without you that day was the most difficult thing I ever did in my entire life. Each step I took further away from you felt heavier, like if my legs weighed a ton. By each second that passed by, my heartbeat jumped from longing and I had to use all my willpower to force myself not to turn around and run back to you. I want to stay, but I know it will be my death. I want you to come, but I know it will be your death. I curse your fucking genius mind for scheming such a perfect escape, the only possible escape. Because we will be separated.
My legs bring me to the car. Craig starts the engine. We are moving down the road, further and further away from you. A wave of panic sweeps over me the moment you are out of my sight.
Screw the war. Screw the Final Solution. Screw der Führer.
All I want is you and just you.
…
The present, 17 January 1948
"Eric!"
Kyle gasped breathless, his whole body going numb. His heart was racing in a dangerous speed. Too hard and too fast from overjoyed shock. The glass with whisky and the violin case fell from his hands and were ignored when reaching the floor. Kyle could not believe his eyes. Right in front of him stood nobody else but Eric Cartman. Alive. Very much alive. All the air left his lungs and he took a difficult burning breath intake. His legs were weakened and felt like jelly. Nevertheless he forced them to move. His whole body felt like it weighted a ton. He felt light-headed from the deep breath intakes, forcing oxygen to circulate back in his lungs, in his blood. Kyle felt like he was drowning in dry air. He felt like the world was blurring and disappearing around him. And yet he walked. Each step was a fragile one. Small unsteady steps. A few short meters were lived like endless miles. But Kyle refused to stop. His vision was blurred from the overwhelming emotions. A smile reached his face when Herr Cartman smiled at him.
"Eric!" Kyle repeated breathless. The air still came too fast and too short in his lungs. His chest burned, his throat was dry and the dizziness persisted. But his body moved at his own accord. And after the short and small extenuating steps, he halted. He was standing right opposite him. They were so close, they could sense each other's breathing. Green eyes were locked on brown ones. Seconds stretched themselves into eternity. Kyle's eyes watered and his smile widened.
"You're alive!" The redhead's voice was cracked from awe, from pain, from unimaginable glee. The first teardrops freed themselves from his green eyes. Hot and salty. With trembling fingers, Kyle reached for Herr Cartman's face. Cold fingertips hesitantly connected with warm skin. The redhead gasped at the touch, at feeling Herr Cartman's warm face. "You're alive!" He repeated in a shaky voice, his cold trembling fingers now cupping Herr Cartman's beloved face in his hands. Kyle released a sob while more tears cascaded down his beautiful face. The Nazi's face felt so soft, so warm, so real. Because it was all real. All surreal dreams, all impossible wishes, all unrealistic hopes were real. "You're alive!" Kyle whispered in a desperately blissful sob.
His hands slipped from Herr Cartman's face, as they gently travelled around his broad back. Kyle rested his temple against Herr Cartman's shoulder while he released turbulent sobs. Pain and despair, unbearable joy, crude happiness. His sobs came out in waves of giggles and crying. Herr Cartman's arms enveloped his back, holding him close, so softly, so gently. Kyle knew he had lost it. He totally broke down. He wished he wasn't crying. He wished he could tell the other how happy he was. But it was all too overwhelming. Emotions had taken him down. They took over his heart, his mind and his body. Kyle cried his heart out, laughed overjoyed for feeling Herr Cartman's scent and warmth once again. He cried for having back what he thought he had lost forever. And desperately strengthened his grip around Herr Cartman's back.
"Are you for real?" Kyle asked between his hard breathing, tightening his grip, his body needing to feel the other's body warmth. Needing the reassurance this was all real and not a fantasy, not another beautiful illusion. "This is not a dream, is it? Please, tell me it's not a dream!"
"It's not a dream, Kalh." Herr Cartman assured in a soft whisper against the redhead's ear, making Kyle feel desperately safe. The Nazi grimaced as his heart broke at Kyle's affliction. "It's for real."
"I mourned you!" Kyle suddenly blurted in a howling miserable voice. His fingers grasped Herr Cartman's clothing desperately, nails digging the material, needing to feel him closer than close.
"I'm so sorry." Herr Cartman whispered regretfully. He held Kyle close, carefully, in a warm protective embrace. He had never seen the redhead this distressed before. Not when he was the body's fetcher, not when he almost got raped, not when he was separated from his family, not when they were departed. He had feared news about his death would reach Kyle's ears. And the redhead's reaction was the confirmation this had indeed happened. His greatest fear had come true. And Kyle had been the victim of his lie. The Jew had suffered a pain he could only start imagining how unbearable it was. "I'm really sorry. It was the only way… I had to fake my own death. I'm so sorry. I really am."
Kyle's face twisted in a half smile with a half sob and he buried his face deeper against the largest man's shoulder. They stayed holding each other for the longest time. Holding in a tight desperate warm embrace. Arms around each other's back. Warm breath brushing their necks and their cheeks. Relishing the heat each other's body emanated. Relishing the feeling of finally being together again. Eventually Kyle's sobs subsided. His breathing stabilized. His heartbeat slowed down to its regular rhythm. He gently released himself from Herr Cartman. He took one step backwards, wanting to see his beloved's face better. But his legs were still weakened and his head was still spinning. He lost his balance, but a pair of strong arms caught him and held him close, against this chest. Kyle released a shaky amused giggle and looked up at Herr Cartman's worried face.
"I feel dizzy." Kyle mumbled tiredly with a smile. Herr Cartman face almost twitched from pain and compassion, feeling troubled for being Kyle's source of affliction.
"Lay down for a while." He said, while he gently guided Kyle to the bed, supporting him while they walked. He turned on the light so he could look better at the Jew. The Nazi was apprehensive for Kyle's paleness and the way his body shook.
"Don't leave me." The Jew begged while his back met the matrass, his head rested on a soft pillow. "Please." His voice was so weak, so meek, so full of fear, despair and agony. Herr Cartman instantly felt his heart shatter. He grimaced, unable to imagine the amount of pain Kyle had undergone. His concern increased because Kyle had never been this vulnerable before. The only time he ever truly broke down was in the Dark Room. And yet, this was different. This was much worse. This pierced his heart, hit his core, stung his soul. Herr Cartman was terribly scared for Kyle. The Jew always had been so strong-headed that seeing him this vulnerable, this fragile, scared him to death.
"Never again." Herr Cartman spoke, his eyes locked in the green ones, sealing this promise solemnly. Kyle smiled. His first smile deprived from any pain, from any despair, from any agony. A simple sincere blissful smile.
"I was told you were dead." Kyle whispered, like if he was telling the other an important secret. Herr Cartman bended over to kiss the redhead's cheek with a gentle caress. Kyle closed his eyes with a soft sigh and a tender smile, relishing the warmth this small touch produced.
"I almost did." Herr Cartman confessed. "I barely made it. And went through a long recovery. Otherwise I would have come to you sooner. So much sooner." Guilt was all over his voice and Kyle opened his eyes. He could read the regret and the fear in the brown ones. He knew Herr Cartman was worried with him. "How long…. When did you hear news about my death?" Kyle gave a compassionate look. He knew Herr Cartman was distressed with the suffering he had to endure during so many months. And automatically knew Herr Cartman had gone through a lot of anxiety himself, worried for his well-being.
"It doesn't matter." Kyle whispered while he caressed Herr Cartman's face.
"Kalh, just tell me…" He insisted but Kyle rested his index on his lips.
"Shhhh. It doesn't matter." The redhead knew the Nazi would protest and planted a soft dry kiss on his lips to stop him from insisting on the matter. He kissed again. Chaste kisses full of desperate need. Full of fear for letting go and lose all over again. "I love you."
"I love you too." Herr Cartman said in a gasp and kissed Kyle with some force, result of the despair and fear darkening his heart. They shared the same need to feel, to be together, to forget the past and live the present.
Herr Cartman placed his legs next to Kyle's sides and bended over to kiss his long lost lover over and over again. He kissed his lips in sweet and tender caresses. He nibbled Kyle's under lip and the Jew opened his mouth, inviting his tongue. They kissed for a long time. Their tongues meeting, tasting their familiar flavors. Relishing the comforting warmth and wetness. Forgetting time. Forgetting the past. Forgetting the separation and the pain that came with it. Kyle's arms rested on Herr Cartman's back and pressed him closer. He needed to feel him. All of him. His scent, his taste, his warmth, his touch, his essence. Herr Cartman's hands travelled down the redhead's small back, massaged his thighs and squeezed his buttocks. Kyle released a half moan, gasping at the enthralling feeling. He closed his eyes while Herr Cartman planted kisses around his neck. Kyle let go another breathless moan as the touches became overwhelming. His chest was rising and falling from hardened breathing, from desperate emotional and physical want.
"Eric… I need you." Kyle whispered in a chocked voice, his fingers searching the other's skin under the layers of clothing.
Herr Cartman lifted his head to look at Kyle's face. He realized he had forgotten how beautiful Kyle was. Although his eyes were still a bit reddened and puffed, they shone with and unusual light, one that reflected crude love and happiness, making the dark green look clearer. His soft lips were slightly departed in a slight smile of awe and anticipation. His cheeks had their usual rose color from when they made love. Overwhelmed by this wonderful vision, Herr Cartman kissed Kyle eagerly, wanting to make up for the too many years of separation. They kissed wonderfully for ages. Soft gentle kisses, dry and chaste, passionate, wet and hot. The redhead's hands travelled to Herr Cartman's lower back and finally found their way under the shirt and touched the warm silky skin.
"I missed you." Kyle confessed. He closed his eyes and pulled his head back, enjoying the pleasurable kisses Herr Cartman traced down his neck. The kisses were interrupted to take off Kyle's jumper. Herr Cartman traced Kyle's neck, collarbone and while doing so, unbuttoned the redhead's shirt, button by button. His kisses traced down the Jew's silky chest till his flat belly.
"Fuck, I missed you too." Herr Cartman gasped.
The touches, the scent, the fastened breathing it all reminded him of how much he missed, he needed to fell Kyle. To be with him. And became therefore all the sudden impatient. He cursed for the clothing that stood in his way. He hurriedly unzipped Kyle's pants and pulled them down, together with the underwear, making Kyle emit a soft amused giggle. The redhead watched the Nazi take off his jumper and shirt, finally revealing his chest. He blinked surprised and his hands traveled to the other's skin. Herr Cartman watched a bit amused as Kyle hesitantly placed his hands on his chest and traced his skin with a fascinated look on his face. The Nazi knew he had lost many of his overweighed pounds due to past illnesses. He was aware that a lot of his former fat was transformed into muscle due to hard physical work. But it all had been worthy. Only that look in Kyle's face compensated for all his past tribulations.
"Wow." Kyle gasped marveled. He looked up to meet Herr Cartman's gaze when he heard a soft chuckle.
"Like what you see, Jew?" Herr Cartman asked, bending over to kiss Kyle's lips afterwards. Kyle's cheeks became instantly red when he realized he had been staring at his lover's chest. He smiled shyly.
"It suits you." He complimented in a mix of embarrassment and lust, while he rubbed his hands against Herr Cartman's almost flat belly.
This time it was Herr Cartman who became flushed. He bended over to kiss and smiled proudly afterwards. Kyle's words, looks, gestures, touches always had made him feel different and especial in some way. And for the first time in his life, he actually felt attractive. He carefully laid on top of Kyle, their lips meeting over and over again, their chests finally connecting, skin on skin, flesh on flesh. Their hands travelled on their sweaty bodies. Their names were whispered like mantras, like magical words of an enchantment. And so the fire of passion grew warmer and greater, exciting their senses and their bodies.
"Eric…please… make love to me." Kyle begged in a moan. The Nazi, drunken in passionate lust, quickly disposed of his pants and underwear. The Nazi kissed the redhead's swollen lips while his index slowly entered the familiar entrance. Kyle released a happy afflictive groan, a mixture of awkward pleasure.
"Fuck! You're so tight." Herr Cartman said in a gasp. This was the confirmation Kyle had been faithful to him. At least he haven't been with a guy lately. Suddenly the thought took over him and he felt the uncontrollable urge to speak out the words. "You haven't been with anybody else, have you?" The Nazi knew he shouldn't have asked this. It was silly. But it was important to him. "Because I haven't." He just needed to know. Kyle did think he was dead for God knows how long.
"No, there was nobody. Ever." Kyle said with a smile, his heart filling with warmth, knowing that, even after their long separation they both had remained truthful to each other. "I couldn't, not even when I thought you were dead. Especially when I thought you were dead."
"Thank you for never giving up on me." Herr Cartman sincerely said while he moved his index deeper in and out Kyle's body. The redhead arched his back from the feeling, it being both uncomfortable and exciting at the same time
"Go easy on me…It's been a while." Kyle plead, a hint of anxiety in his voice, his breathing becoming the more intense and irregular as the index moved faster in and out his body, stretching his walls. Herr Cartman grinned almost evilly at the Jew's request. His erection grew even harder at the expectation of his lover's tightness and felt a merciless excitement travel through his body. The index abandoned the Jew's hole, leaving Kyle both relieved and frustrated. He watched silently Herr Cartman fetch something from the drawer and saw him wet his finger with some kind of gel.
"Spread out for me." The Nazi asked in a choke, his body barely holding on to the exciting anticipation any longer.
Kyle obeyed, spreading his legs wider. He could feel his face heat up and felt stupid for being embarrassed and dying of expectation simultaneously. But it had been such a long time the last time he did this, he almost forgot how it felt. He gasped marveled as two fingers slid in his opening, moving now easily thanks to the cold and wet gel. Kyle released a moan of pleasure and Herr Cartman watched hypnotized at Kyle's face while he moved his fingers skillfully in and out, rubbing Kyle's spongy prostate, teasing him with pleasure. Kyle's head was pulled back, eyes shut tightly, his brow furrowed, his lips departed, releasing gasps of wonderful desire. A third finger entered the tight opening, widening even more the walls and Kyle released a lusty scream. He became restless, his hips moving up and down, begging to feel more of Herr Cartman's touch. The Nazi made sure Kyle was prepared enough and retrieved his fingers.
"I'm going inside of you now, Kalh." He warned, while he spread some gel on his erection and departed the Jew's buttocks. Kyle nodded breathless, his eyes darkened from lust while an unbearable pleasure of expectation consumed him.
They locked their gazes. Herr Cartman rested one hand on Kyle's hip, while he guided his erection into the redhead's entrance with his other. Kyle released an embarrassing high-pitched moan when the long and hardened member filled his tight walls. His whole body trembled from shock, pain and unbearable pleasure. He grasped the Nazi's back with force, seeking support and closeness. Herr Cartman couldn't leave his eyes from the redhead's face. He loved to watch the way his face contorted first from the discomfort and then relaxed to be replaced by the sexiest expression of blissful pleasure. Kyle had his head back, his body arched in sensual dancing movements while his voice produced beautiful melodic moans.
Herr Cartman moved in and out, unable to believe he was making love to Kyle again. After all this time. They both had remained faithful for each other. So loyal and true to their feelings. He wanted Kyle to feel how he felt. Happy and loved, safe and protected, wanted and needed, desperate to have the other back. So he thrust carefully. Deep and slow. Relishing the pleasure that was increased by the torturous slow pace. He watched fascinated as Kyle slowly lost it under him.
The redhead had surrendered completely to his feelings, to his physical pleasure. He moaned softly, in an enchanting music, singing the song of love and passion. Herr Cartman watched marveled Kyle's reactions to his movements. The way Kyle closed his eyes and pulled his head back with a smile, releasing the most sensual moan every time he shoved his erection deeper, harder and faster in his body. Herr Cartman moved faster. In and out. He moved deeper. Aggressively. In and out. As the heat rose, as their bodies sweated, as their moans intensified, as their nails dug linens and skin; Herr Cartman banged madly. He pressed his large hands on Kyle's small hips for support and pounded mercilessly. He came to a point he didn't care if it hurt or not. He could not tell either way. Because every time his body hit the depths of the other's, Kyle released a louder moan, scratching his nails in his back and smiled of contentment. Herr Cartman could feel his own climax want to be released. He knew he was about to cum. But he needed to hear one more moan. Watch one more smile of satisfaction. Listen to one more word begging him to hit him harder and deeper. Herr Cartman let go of the hips. His hands instead grabbed Kyle's thighs and placed his legs on his shoulders. He dug further deep in the redhead's inside, causing desperate screams of passion under him.
"I'm gonna cum!" Herr Cartman warned while Kyle moaned uncontrollably under him.
Then was a moment the redhead ceased moaning. His whole body stiffened while it trembled scarily. There was a grunt, then a complaining groan, seconds of silence and finally a loud passionate yell. Herr Cartman grunted like a wild animal when he felt Kyle's orgasm and came himself, spilling an accumulated quantity of sperm inside the other's body. Mad sweet kisses followed, accompanied by happy laughter's. Both collapsed in each other's arms, limbs tangled around each other, refusing to let the other go. Never wanting to be departed from each other. Ever again.