Confession

Kiyoko steeled herself as she entered the communication/surveillance room. She went to the console and sat down. Kiyoko knew she had to do this, but after the conversation she'd just had with Haruka, she was so anxious. She took a few deep breaths and tried to connect to Estara. A moment later one of the castle staff, Atsuko, appeared on the screen. Kiyoko smiled at her, "Good morning Atsuko. How is everything there?"

Atsuko's face pinched a little, "Fine you're Highness, although I think Ruka is turning her room into a forest." She exhaled. Atsuko was the staff that spent the most time caring for her children and Ruka tended to stretch Atsuko's nerves.

Nodding, Kiyoko responded, "Seiya mentioned something about that yesterday. Please be patient with her and I will address it when I come home. Would you mind getting Seiya for me actually, I need to speak with her." Atsuko nodded and disappeared from the screen.

A few moments later Seiya sat down and appeared on the screen, her expression so happy it made Kiyoko's heart hurt because she knew it wouldn't stay that way. Seiya grinned at her beloved, "Does this mean you spoke to Haruka?"

Kiyoko swallowed, "Well yes, but I don't think that she will be agreeing to stand by me at our wedding anytime soon." She saw the confusion in Seiya's face and continued, "There is something else I need to speak with you about. And I have to begin by apologizing my love."

"Apologizing? What in the world would you have to apologize for Kiyoko?" Seiya's brow was furrowed and she stared at the screen expectantly.

Kiyoko gathered her courage and began, "Please hear me out before you say anything my love." Seiya nodded uncertainly and so Kiyoko went on, "I had a motive for coming here that has nothing to do with the wedding." Seiya's eyes narrowed slightly, but she didn't say anything. So Kiyoko kept speaking, "In the spell book I took home with us six months ago I found a letter from my father. He made a request of me. It has to do with a spell in there as well. Seiya, it would allow Serenity and I to resurrect the Shitenou, the generals that served my father…. But it's risky. It requires a massive amount of energy, hence the need for us to work together on it, and even then…." She stopped speaking because of the shock on Seiya's face.

There was silence while Kiyoko waited for her fiancée to process what she'd said. Her face went from confused to angry. At last she responded, "Why in the hell didn't you tell me? Six months and you didn't tell me!" Even through the viewer screen Kiyoko could see the anger increase in Seiya. "And you want to do this now. That's why you didn't want me to come with you! You lied to me!" Tears began trickling down her face at the hurt she felt.

Knowing that Seiya was about to walk away from the screen, Kiyoko had to act quickly, "Please don't walk away Seiya. I didn't lie to you, exactly. I should've been honest. I did come here with the intent of dealing with wedding things as well. But I should've spoken to you about this months ago. I was afraid." A tear escaped her eye as well.

Seiya replied, anger clear in her voice, "Afraid of what? Afraid that I would be concerned? Afraid that I wouldn't want you to risk your life? Afraid that I might try and stop you?"

Kiyoko blinked, her beloved knew her so well, "Yes, honestly. I was and am afraid of those things." A few more tears escaped.

Seiya snapped, "Of course I'd be concerned for you and for your life! I am concerned. Frankly, I love you Kiyoko, but this is insane." For a moment Kiyoko want to laugh and point out that Seiya sounded like Haruka, but she didn't. She simply waited as Seiya spoke, "How can you risk your life like this? If you fail you could die! You could leave Estara without her Queen, leave me alone, and leave our children without you! How can you consider this?"

It was like Kiyoko had been punched in the stomach. She didn't want to leave her children or Seiya, but she still believed this was the right thing to do. She wiped the tears and replied, "I can consider it because it's the right thing. I won't die. My father would never have asked it of me if he genuinely believed I would die. Why can't you trust me?"

Not realizing it were possible, but Seiya's expression grew angrier, "Trust you?! You kept this from me for six months and you expect me to trust you? I love you Kiyoko, but asking me to trust you right now…" Her voice trailed off.

The tears streaming down Kiyoko's face became thicker and she couldn't keep them wiped away. She'd broken the most sacred tenants of partnership, honesty and trust. She'd hurt her beloved more than she'd ever intended too.

"It wouldn't help to point out that I only kept this from you for the last three months, I suppose. I shouldn't have kept it from you at all. I can't say that enough." She bowed her head, "You once told me that you were not worthy of me, but now I feel like I am not worthy of you. I betrayed your trust. Nothing I say could change that now. All I can do is hope that you will be able to forgive me eventually and come to understand why I have to do this."

Seiya shook her head, "So it doesn't matter what I say? You'll do this regardless?" Her fists sat on the console balled up so tightly Kiyoko thought she might break her own fingers.

Speaking in a small voice, Kiyoko responded, "If you truly and completely object to this I will not do it. But I would like you to think about it, please. My mother has declared that no action will be taken for three days. Trust me, she is angry with me too. Perhaps this really is foolish, it seems that all it is doing is angering everyone. Serenity was angry at me when she found out I hadn't told you, my mother is angry, Setsuna is angry, Haruka is angry, I believe that even Rei is angry at me. Deep down I genuinely believe this is the right thing…. But I seem to be the only one…." The tears got even thicker.

Seiya exhaled and pulled back her own tears. She couldn't stand to see the way that Kiyoko was suffering over this. Seiya knew that Kiyoko hadn't hurt her on purpose. She'd always believe in things so intensely that it threatened to consume her body and soul. It was one of the things that had made her fall in love with her to begin with. Kiyoko was so strong and yet here she was sitting before Seiya, so to speak, broken into pieces.

At last Seiya spoke, "I love you Kiyoko, nothing can change that. And I know that you believe in this. Leaving those men trapped seems so unfair, but how can I just sit here and wait to find out if you've lived or died? And I can't leave our children or our home. You were right about that. You've put me in such a horrible position here. However, I know that you didn't do it on purpose…."

Kiyoko nodded, still crying, "I would NEVER hurt you on purpose! I swear it!" She made another feeble attempt to wipe away her tears.

Seiya replied, "I know. But I don't know about this…. Three days? I will think on it. What does Yaten say about all of this?"

Kiyoko swallowed, "She says that she trusts in my power, and in Serenity's as well. She is the only one supporting me so far. But I know she is worried as well."

Seiya took a deep breath, "She is very wise. Three days…. I need time. I will contact you when I have decided whether or not I can support you. However, know that I will always love you. Goodbye for now." And with that the screen went dark. Kiyoko just sat there, tears unable to stop. She was a fool… But even so, she still believed….

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