A/N: I'm sorry for the long wait on this chapter. Just a couple more to go after this one I think, and I will try to get the next one up in much better time. I hope you enjoy the chapter!
Robin wakes to the sound of two boys giggling and dragging large objects past the bedroom door. Henry's insistent shushing of Roland makes Robin think that he's probably meant to continue lying in bed and pretending to be asleep and ignorant of what he's certain is the mischief going on just beyond the closed door. Robin is more than happy to oblige the boys though, because Regina is still asleep and curled against his side.
Robin had assumed that Regina was a morning person when he first met her, and most days she does rise with the sun, her alarm blasting some tone that Robin has come to despise at 5:30 most mornings. Regina pops out of bed looking awake and alert and beautiful, while Robin is grumbling and begging her to come back to bed with him for just a while longer.
But what Robin has realized is that there are mornings when without her alarm, Regina can keep on sleeping long past when her bedroom becomes bright with the morning sun. Robin has a special affinity for those lazy mornings spent in bed with Regina.
He can feel her stirring against him now, not awake yet, but not so deeply asleep. She's nuzzling into his chest, seeking out a more comfortable position he's certain, but still he likes to believe that she is moving closer to his heart, seeking out the organ that is hers, will always be hers. Robin smiles at himself, at the sentimentality Regina brings out in him, the part of him that hopelessly believes in true love and happily ever afters - he can imagine nothing else as long as he has the woman in his arms and the boys conspiring together downstairs.
Regina mumbles sleepily, her eyes still closed, her arms wrapping around Robin's waist. It makes him smile. "Good morning my love," Robin whispers, doesn't want to wake Regina if she's still asleep.
She isn't. Robin watches her smile against his chest. Her eyes flutter open and she looks up at him with a tired smile. Robin brings one hand to card through her hair, smoothing down the sleep-strewn locks and making Regina's smile grow. She leans up for a kiss and whispers a soft "Good morning" against his lips.
Robin pulls Regina back against his chest, hugs her tightly to him to keep her from trying to leave the bed. But she doesn't seem to have any interest in moving, snuggles against Robin and kisses his neck, her arms tight around him.
Regina keeps pressing small kisses to Robin's neck and jaw. She's smiling sweetly at him and reaches up to cup his face and kiss his lips. Robin tugs Regina closer, pulls her on top of him and makes her squeal and giggle. Oh how he loves that noise.
"I must be crushing you," Regina says, but she makes no attempt to shift her weight.
"Not at all, and don't you even think about moving."
"Do I look like I'm going anywhere?"
"Just making sure. I'm afraid I've become rather fond of having you in my arms in the morning."
Regina grins at Robin, shakes her head and looks a little bit incredulous, and so very happy.
"Our boys are up to some mischief this morning," Robin informs Regina, "so I think we are supposed to occupy ourselves for a while longer here."
"How long do we need to keep busy for? Long enough for a little mischief of our own?"
Robin chuckles at the playful grin on Regina's face, loves how playful and truly happy she appears here in his arms.
"I honestly don't have the faintest idea what they were doing. Rearranging furniture or moving large boxes from the sounds of it."
Regina leans over towards the bedside table to peer at the alarm clock. Robin whines at the movement. "Where are you going?"
Regina chuckles and nips playfully at Robin's bottom lip before telling him, "I was just looking at the date. July 25th. Henry must have convinced Roland to help him drag Christmas decorations down from the attic."
"I thought you told me Christmas is in December."
"It is, but Christmas in July is an excuse to drink cocoa and eat cookies and sing carols in the summer. Once Henry learned about it he insisted we celebrate every year…until…" Regina's face falls for a moment and Robin can see her thinking of the past, of the difficult times for her and her son. He runs his hand through her hair and watches as she smiles and seems to shake off the bad memories. "I still can't believe he's really home." Regina's eyes are a little glassy, but her smile is so beautiful as she settles back against Robin's chest.
Robin presses a kiss to Regina's hair "I love you."
Regina looks up at Robin again then, her hands moving to his cheeks and his hair. Robin's heart feels so full with the way Regina is looking at him. "I love you too," she tells him with a soft smile so full of that love she speaks of. Robin thinks that most people wouldn't see the slight anxiety on Regina's face when she tells him, voice full of amazement, "You make me so happy Robin."
Robin grins at Regina, tightens his arms around her back. "Oh my love, I am so ridiculously, insanely, wonderfully, fantastically, stupendously happy with you." Regina laughs and smacks Robin's chest. Robin reaches out and tucks a strand of Regina's hair behind her ear, his palm cupping her cheek as he tells her. "Being with you and having the privilege to spend my life trying to make you happy brings me such joy."
Regina's hands go to Robin's cheeks, her lips on his. Her kiss is so gentle and full of love, and he kisses her and hopes she can feel the same love that he feels from her, hopes she can understand that his feelings are just as deep as hers.
"We have time for mischief then?" Robin asks.
Robin gets his answer in the form of Regina's lips on his neck and hands pulling at his shirt. Yes, Robin's favorite mornings are most definitely spent in bed with Regina.
Regina, Robin, and their boys are sitting in front of the fireplace roasting marshmallows and creating far more of a mess than Regina would normally allow in her living room. But Henry looks so happy as his marshmallow drops from his stick straight into his hot chocolate that Regina doesn't mention the splash of dark liquid that lands on the wood floor as well as all over Henry's pajamas.
Henry offers Regina a sheepish apology, but she just smiles. "And here I thought Roland would be the one covered in chocolate."
"Let's see you do better," Henry challenges, handing Regina the bag of marshmallows. She smiles at Henry as she pushes two marshmallows onto a stick and places it above the fire. She wraps her free arm around Henry's shoulders, and he leans against her side happily drinking his cocoa.
Next to Regina, Robin is helping Roland toast his marshmallow. They don't seem to be having that much success as yet another marshmallow catches on fire. Robin blows out the flames and immediately the marshmallow goes into his little boy's mouth, seemingly unfazed by the char.
Regina pulls her own marshmallows from the fire and turns smugly to Henry. "Tell me these are not the most beautifully toasted marshmallows you've ever seen."
"Yeah, yeah." Henry rolls his eyes.
Regina chuckles as she takes the first marshmallow off the stick and hands it to Henry. "For my Little Prince."
"Thanks Mom." Henry pops the whole thing in his mouth as Regina nibbles the other marshmallow off the stick.
Robin is watching Regina's mouth the entire time, his eyes following her tongue as it darts out to lick the remnants of the sticky sweet from the stick.
"Now who's covered in their food?" Robin asks. "Allow me to assist you." His lips are on Regina's, licking the marshmallow from her lips for a long moment.
Regina feels Henry move away with an "Ew," which Roland soon echoes. The two boys are scampering off leaving Regina and Robin kissing and smiling against one another's mouths.
"Do you think we've traumatized them for life?" Regina asks teasingly.
From across the room Henry yells an emphatic "Yes!"
Regina turns to Henry. "I cannot wait for you to start dating."
"That's weird. Normal parents want their kids to wait forever to date."
"Why would I want that? I can't wait to see you in love."
"And you can't wait to tease me and embarrass me."
"It would only be fair," Regina says with a fond smile. Robin's arms are wrapping around Regina's waist as she talks, and she can't help but notice the way Henry grins at that. No matter what Henry tries to say Regina knows he loves seeing her with Robin, and it warms Regina's heart so much that Henry wants her happiness. "What are you and Roland doing over there anyway?" she asks, leaning back against Robin's chest.
Henry keeps rummaging through the boxes of Christmas decorations. He tosses a Santa hat at Roland who puts it on his head despite being three sizes too big.
Henry finally finds what he's looking for, yanks a tangled heap of faux mistletoe from the box, and tosses it at Regina and Robin.
Robin scowls in confusion and picks up the curious object. "What is this?"
"Proof that Henry is a romantic and that we will never take him seriously when he pretends to be disgusted by us kissing."
Henry laughs at Robin's continued confusion, ignoring his mother's answer. "It's mistletoe. It's a Christmas tradition that you have to kiss anyone standing under the mistletoe with you."
"Thank you Henry. I will make good use of this."
"Merry Christmas Robin. Maybe just don't make me watch too much, ok?"
"I'll try my best," Robin promises.
Regina's cheeks are suddenly deep red, which makes Robin and Henry laugh. Roland joins in, though Regina is fairly certain that he isn't certain why they're all laughing. But they are, and then they're all hugging Regina and pressing kisses to her cheeks. It's everything she's wanted, and it's hers, truly, finally hers.
Robin cannot imagine a more perfect day. They had been watching Mickey's Christmas Carol together, Henry and Regina looked so happy to have this tradition back, and Roland had loved the movie and had been nothing but smiles. Robin loved snuggling on the couch with his family and partaking in the simple pleasure of a day together. It had been wonderful.
Until Snow was pounding on the door and barging in with tears in her eyes and a frantic, confused explanation of an old foster mother of Emma's who had ice magic and had kidnapped Emma or maybe Emma chose to go with her.
David fills in the gaps about how Emma had lost control of her magic. Snow sobs then, insists that it's her fault, all her fault, she drove Emma away. She's with the Snow Queen now, David supplies, the Snow Queen who has powerful magic and some mysterious plan that requires Emma's magic to enact.
Snow is sobbing, pulling out of David's arms and walking over to Regina. "Please Regina, please help her."
Regina takes Snow's hands in her own. "I promise I will get Emma back. I took her from you once Snow, but I will not let you lose your daughter again."
Snow throws her arms around Regina's neck. "Thank you." Regina pauses startled for a minute before wrapping her arms around Snow's back and rubbing soothingly. "Thank you."
"It'll be ok," Regina says, her voice full of strength and confidence, her face showing no doubt. "I will bring her home to you."
Robin watches Snow sag in Regina's arms, clinging desperately. Robin understands Snow's plea to Regina, knows he would do anything if someone threatened Roland, and Regina is Snow's best hope. But still, Robin feels the anger bubble inside him at the terrible responsibility Snow is placing on Regina. He knows that Regina will never forgive herself if she can't save Emma.
Snow has dissolved into tears, and Regina is shushing her the same way Robin has seen Regina soothe Henry when he is upset. Robin wonders if this was what Regina had done when she was expected to be Snow's stepmother. Robin's anger flares again at that thought. He's livid at Snow, at Leopold, at Cora, at the world for forcing Regina to be a stepmother at seventeen, for making her mother Snow when Regina herself was still a child, a child so hurt and abused.
But Robin tries to bite back the anger, will not allow himself to feel that way towards Snow when she and Regina are finally mending their relationship. Robin tries not to begrudge the promises that Regina is making now and the way that Snow seems to think nothing of Regina putting her life in danger because Snow is asking.
Regina needs a moment to know what peace and safety feel like if she is ever going to trust in her happiness. Robin curses the universe for never giving something so simple to the woman he loves.
Regina ushers Snow and David out the door moments later and immediately runs to Henry. He's sitting on the couch, wide eyed and terrified.
"It's going to be ok sweetheart. I promise that I am going to find Emma."
"Emma thinks I don't love her. That's why she went to the Snow Queen. Because she thought she didn't have any family who loves her."
"Sweetheart, this isn't your fault."
"It is. You heard Snow. Emma thinks that no one loves her. That means she thinks that I don't love her."
"Henry." Regina holds one of Henry's hands in hers, her other palm on his cheek. "Listen to me sweetheart. This is not your fault. Emma had a very hard life before she came to Storybrooke, and sometimes when people grow up without the love they deserve, it's hard for them to trust that people will love them. Emma's still learning that people love her. But Henry, none of that is your fault. You're the child, and it isn't your job to take care of Emma, or of me for that matter. I know you want to, and I love you so much for that, but it isn't your responsibility."
"I was mean to her," Henry whispers, his voice shaking and absolutely breaking Regina's heart.
"You had every right to tell Emma how you feel, just like you had every right to tell me how you felt when you found out about my past and about being adopted, ok? It's my job and Emma's job to take care of you, and we can't do that if you don't talk to us."
"But I hurt you, and now I hurt Emma!"
Regina lifts Henry's chin up so that he meets her eyes. "None of it is your fault. I'm your mother, and I will always love you. You can tell me anything, and it will never change how much I love you. I wish I could have been better for you, and I am so sorry for hurting you. But I wouldn't change a single thing about the relationship we have now. And part of what I love about it is that you can be honest with me and trust me."
"Of course I trust you Mom!"
"Good." Regina leans forward to press a kiss to Henry's forehead. "You need to be able to be honest with the people who love you, and that includes Emma. You did nothing wrong, and I know that she will agree with me. What happened to Emma is not your fault, do you understand me?" Henry nods, looks half believing. "I am going to find Emma and bring her home. Everything will be all right. I won't let you lose her Henry."
"Mom wait!" He grabs her hand as she begins to pull back to stand. "What are you going to do?"
"I'm going to find Emma."
"But what if the Snow Queen tries to hurt you?"
"I'll be ok sweetheart." Regina smiles reassuringly at Henry. "Don't worry. Everything will be ok."
Henry looks so unsure, but he nods and throws his arms around Regina's neck. He's hugging her so tightly and burring his face in the crook of her neck. Regina presses her lips to his temple, one hand on his back holding him tightly and the other cradling his head. He lets out a few silent sobs, holds her tighter. "I have you honey. I'm here."
"Promise me you'll be all right Mom."
"Of course I'm going to be ok. You don't need to worry about me."
"But I do." It's a whisper against Regina's neck, and she feels wetness there and hates herself for making her baby scared even if it she is still so happy to know how much she means to him. "Mom? I know you think I want Emma to be my Mom, but I don't. And I don't…"
"What is it?"
"Don't try to be a hero and put yourself in danger to get to her. I can't lose you. Please Momma."
"Henry." Regina eases Henry back so that she can look at him. "I am coming back to you. I love you."
"I love you too. You promised that we would never be separated again when we broke the curse."
Regina wipes tears from Henry's cheeks and gives him a bright smile even though she feels far from confident. "And we never will be honey. Don't worry; Emma and I will be back very soon."
"Robin what do you think you're doing?" There's a warning in her voice, and for a moment Robin sees so much of the woman he met in the Enchanted Forest. It scares him, because that woman had been so closed off and isolated, so damned determined to push everyone away.
"I thought that would be obvious." Robin indicates the quiver full of arrows on his back with a teasing smile.
"And what do you think that is going to do against magic? I told you to stay home with Henry and Roland."
"Henry assured me that he would watch out for Roland. Regina, what is going on? I've accompanied you on missions such as this before, both here and in our land." Robin moves closer to Regina, and though she stiffens she doesn't move away from him. He tilts his head down to look Regina in the eyes, sees that some of the hardness there recede. "What's wrong?"
"The Snow Queen has no qualms with you. You need to go home."
"What about you?"
"I need to find Emma. I can't let Henry and Snow lose her."
"They won't. But none of us can bear to lose you either."
"You won't. I can handle myself."
Robin's heart breaks, because he knows how strong Regina is. He loves that Regina is powerful and smart and brave, but it also makes him desperately sad to watch her once again try to be unbreakable. "I know you can, but everyone needs backup. I'm not letting you go out there alone."
"No! Don't you dare put yourself in danger for me!"
"I can't promise you that. I'm not letting you go off on your own not even knowing what you're going to find."
"Damn it Robin! You can't risk getting hurt or-" Her voice catches, and Robin thinks of how many people she's lost, and suddenly he feels awful for making her so afraid.
"Regina," Robin coaxes, reaching out for her and hating that she backs away, tries to keep her back perfectly straight.
"I won't allow you to do this for me."
"I would do anything for you."
Regina's head drops for a moment, her voice low and pleading. "You shouldn't. Please Robin. I'm not worth you putting yourself in danger." Then she's straightening up again, lifting her forehead, and sounding every bit like the queen he met in the Enchanted Forest. "You can pretend all you want that I'm good, but it's just a lie. The woman sharing your bed is the Evil Queen."
Robin can't bear it anymore, can't allow Regina to try to put this awful distance between them. Robin reaches out and grabs Regina's shoulders, sees the fear in her eyes, and immediately releases her. "I'm sorry."
Robin thinks that fear is of him seeing her, seeing her love for him and knowing how much she wants him to fight for her. But still Robin wonders if there's a part of her that is afraid because he's holding her too tightly, because she's thinking of any of the other hands that have held her. He stands there and aches to hold her, clenches his fists at his sides to keep from reaching out again before Regina is ready.
"You aregood Regina. You are kind and nurturing and brave. I know your past, and it doesn't make you any less precious to me or to our boys. And you are not some woman sharing my bed. You're my soulmate. You're my everything."
Robin sees Regina's eyes soften, sees so much love. But her face is still a hard mask, and she grits her teeth and tells him. "I should never have told you about the tattoo." It's harsh and cold, but he knows, of course he knows. Robin reaches out for Regina then, knows that touching her will make it harder for her to deny the love they share. Robin lays his hands gently on Regina's back, making sure she doesn't seem at all afraid before pulling her towards him and stroking up and down over her warm coat.
Regina looks away from Robin's face, but he sees the tears shining in her eyes and when she speaks her voice is a teary whisper. "You deserve so much better than me. You can't follow me Robin. Please."
Robin pulls Regina closer, leans his forehead against hers. "I love you Regina. And I am grateful everyday that you love me and that I get to share my life with you. You must know that." Her eyes are squeezed shut, and Robin brings a hand to her cheek, runs his fingers along her skin. He feels the tension leaving her as his fingers caress her temples, ease the creases around her eyes. Robin nuzzles his nose gently against Regina's. "I know you're scared, and so am I. I am terrified right now that you are about to put yourself in danger and that I am going to lose you. I know you think you're protecting me, but I will not survive losing you."
"You won't lose me."
"I want to spend our lives together Regina. I want us to be partners, which means you have to let me help you."
"And if I don't?" It's a challenge, and Robin can see her trying her best to push him away while still wanting him so desperately.
Robin sighs and shakes his head, wishes he could take Regina's pain from her, wishes she knew that there was nothing she could ever do to push him away. Robin offers Regina a sad smile, looks at her terrified eyes and aches for how much she's been through. His thumb caresses her cheek, softly touching her, hoping to focus her. Robin leans in and presses his lips to Regina's, feels her lips part as she slowly opens herself to him, her arms wrapping around Robin, one hand cupping his neck, the other firm on his back.
Regina sags against Robin, her muscles finally relaxing. Robin runs his hands over her back and presses his forehead against hers. "I love you Regina." His palms are on her cheeks, and Regina reaches up to cover his hands with her own.
"I am going to be so angry if you get yourself killed."
It catches Robin off guard and makes him laugh. Regina smiles too, lets out a deep breath and nuzzles her nose against his, tells him, "I love you so much."
"I don't think you know how happy that makes me. We found each other, my love, and we're going to keep holding onto each other. All right?" Regina offers Robin a tentative nod. "I know you're still struggling to believe how much you deserve and how beautiful you are. But I need you to try to believe Regina, and until you do please remember that your family needs you. We love you and need you."
"Ok." Regina closes her eyes and leans against Robin's forehead. "Ok, I'm sorry. I just…I am so afraid to lose you."
"Then it is a good thing that I am not going anywhere. I suspect that our lives will always be a bit more eventful than most people's, but we're in this together. We are going to be just fine. We will find this Snow Queen and save Emma, and then I am taking you home and kissing you senseless until you know how very much I am in love with you."
"I do know Robin."
Robin smiles and presses his lips to Regina. "If you won't mind terribly, I think I would like to kiss you senseless regardless."
Regina smiles, a small thing, but still it warms Robin. "I think that would be acceptable." Robin smiles at Regina, his hand cupping her face, and her smile grows. Their lips meet and the kiss is soft and sweet, and Robin can feel Regina embracing this love and trust.
When their lips part, Robin pulls Regina against his chest, needs to hold her tightly, must convince himself that they're ok, that she's ok and that she's not pushing him away anymore. She's here and she is fighting her fear and letting Robin hold her. He's overwhelmed by gratefulness, presses a kiss to Regina's hair. "Thank you, thank you Regina." He holds her tighter, repeats the words over and over, until Regina is looking up at him looking so full of regret for scaring him. "It's ok my love. We're ok."
"I'm sorry."
Robin smiles and shakes his head, promises himself that no matter how terrified it makes him that Regina nearly ran off without any backup, that he will not be angry with her for her fears. He knows she struggles, knows what she's been through, and loves her all the more for the fact that she is here with him despite it. He breathes her in, takes comfort in her presence, in the feeling of body pressed against him, her breath against the skin of his neck.
"I'm so sorry."
"You're forgiven my love. You were afraid and trying to protect me. I understand that, believe me. Just know that protecting me must mean keeping yourself safe." Regina nods against Robin, her face still tucked into the crook of his neck. "You are precious to me and to Henry and Roland. Until you know how truly incredible you are and that you deserve all the happiness in the world, hold on to the fact that you have a family who loves you dearly."
Regina looks up at Robin, stares into his eyes and smiles at him. She reaches out and takes his hand. "Let's go defeat this Snow Queen."
"Together," Robin tells Regina, squeezing her hand tightly.
"Together."