'Ballad of a Dove' – LI

'The sharp knife of a short life,

Well, I've had just enough time'

If I Die Young by The Band Perry

A strange kind of high had followed the birth, and the adrenaline continued to pump through Dawn's body long after the paramedics had transferred her to Sunnydale General.

Dr. Kalkirasch had lingered only long enough to oversee the final stage of the labour and ensure that Dawn was both well and comfortable, before he had again utilised a portal to return him to his surgery. Buffy had waited ten minutes as per the doctor's instruction before calling for an ambulance, which had arrived with sirens blaring much to Dawn's mortification. A suitable cover story was concocted, whereby Buffy and Spike explained that Dawn had been unaware that she was in established labour until the urge to push had suddenly overcome her. Far from seeming dubious, the paramedics had accepted the story and congratulated all on a potential catastrophe averted.

Due to the brilliant morning sunshine, Spike had been forced to remain in Giles' apartment, but had vowed to visit that evening just as soon as the sun had begun to dip below the horizon. His excitement had been palpable as he danced around his girlfriend and child, scattering kisses between them and shooting them alternate looks of adoration. Dawn did not doubt the sincerity of his words as he whispered a breathless goodbye, before she was wheeled out to the waiting ambulance, her perfect bundle swaddled in one of Giles' bath towels in her arms. The whole journey had been spent for her simply staring wide-eyed down at the tiny being that slumbered in her arms. The chatter of the paramedics washed over her, largely unheard, and although she knew she must be quite rudely ignoring their questions, she could not bring herself to care.

After a rushed and somewhat confusing conversation with Angel on their cell phones, Buffy had agreed to meet him at the hospital, and followed behind the ambulance in her own car, several times coming dangerously close to falling asleep at the wheel. It was a relief when she was finally able to pull into the parking lot, although she realised too late that the gas tank was dangerously low. By the time Buffy had managed to obtain a much needed coffee from the cafeteria, Dawn had showered, changed into a hospital issue gown, braided her hair, and been assigned her room for the duration of her stay. As Buffy wandered onto the ward, her eyes sweeping the tired and occasionally pained faces of the other new mothers housed there, she happened upon Dawn negotiating her very first diaper change. For a moment, Buffy hung back by the door, watching with curiousity as Dawn's fingers worked at fastening the loudly protesting child into the fresh diaper. With both sticky tabs secured, Dawn lifted the squalling child into her arms and cradled her against her chest, beginning to sway from one foot to the other in a bid to calm her. The baby quieted almost immediately, apparently recovering quickly from the outrage of cold air against her bare backside. A smile passed across Dawn's lips, and she continued to murmur to the babe until Buffy stepped inside the room, clearing her throat.

"You're a natural," Buffy stated, surprised to find herself grinning even as she spoke the words. Although she had long ago come to terms with the fact that motherhood had for the time evaded her, Buffy had still expected to experience some degree of jealously once Dawn's child had arrived. However, Buffy found that, far from resenting the beautiful gift her sister had been awarded, she could not have been happier for Dawn, and for the apparent ease with which it seemed she would slip into her role as a parent.

Blushing a little at the unexpected praise, Dawn shrugged and set about swaddling the infant in a pink blanket stamped with the hospital logo. Buffy made a mental note amongst her scattered thoughts to retrieve Dawn's hospital bag from the house in order to drop it by when she returned for evening visiting hours.

"I wouldn't be so sure," Dawn breathed, licking her lips as she regarded her sister, "she's barely three hours old and already I'm panicking about her first day at kindergarten, and wondering how many tables I'll need to wait to pay her college tuition."

Laughter bubbling up from her throat, Buffy shook her head and gathered Dawn into her arms. Their embrace was brief but Dawn stepped away from it with a genuine smile.

"Angel's going to swing by in a few and then we're heading home to crash," said Buffy, her eyes never once appearing to leave the squirming baby, whose tiny lips were parted in a constant 'o' as she shifted and snuffled into her mother's shoulder.

"Cool," Dawn replied, nodding and offering Buffy a smile, "the nurses keep nagging me to take a nap anyways."

Returning Dawn's smile, Buffy moved forward and gently caressed the back of the baby's head, entwining her fingers with the dark fluff that covered her head like a cap. The child let out a squeak in response and, despite the exhaustion that made her body feel heavy, Buffy's smile widened until it was a grin of unadulterated joy.

"She's going to need a name," the Slayer observed, catching her sister's gaze as the younger woman shifted her weight from one foot to the other and shrugged.

"I'm working on it," she answered, a pink glow blooming upon her cheeks as she avoided Buffy's scrutiny. With a slightly suspicious nod, Buffy leaned forwards and brushed a kiss against the crown of the baby's head.

"I guess I'd better go wait for Angel in the parking lot," Buffy said, affectionately squeezing Dawn's arm and moving forwards in order to kiss her sister's cheek. At the last second, Dawn withdrew, her features drawn into a frown.

"Buffy… what was that back there?" demanded Dawn, her tone strained. She rubbed circles on the baby's back and the infant settled her head into the curve of her mother's body, lulled by the sounds of a familiar heartbeat.

"Honestly…" Buffy began, pausing as she thought back upon the ominous figures that had surrounded the courtyard so swiftly, and disappeared with just as little explanation, "I have no idea. Soon as Angel and I are home, I'll make a few calls. We'll get answers, Dawnie… I promise."

Satisfied for the moment by her sister's promise, Dawn nodded before ducking forwards and kissing Buffy's cheek.

"Thank you…" Dawn murmured, lowering her voice as she realised that the baby's breathing had evened out against her body. "I couldn't have done it without you, Buffy. I know it's something that nobody says enough so… thank you."

Buffy swallowed down the lump that rose in her throat with some difficulty, not wanting to dampen down the joy the day had brought with tears.

"You're always welcome," she replied after a moment of silence had passed.

Turning away from Dawn's bed, Buffy started out towards the hospital elevators, finally filled with the sense that somehow, everything would indeed work out for the best.

x-x-x

Despite her most valiant efforts, Dawn had failed to snatch even an hour of sleep during the day, and was holding out very little hope for the foreseeable future. Whilst her own child had slept surprisingly well, waking only a handful of times to feed, Dawn had been subjected to the cries of a dozen other babies in surrounding rooms. Coupled with the constant visits from various staff to routinely check her obs., ply her with painkillers, and offer unnecessary advice, Dawn had given up on the idea of sleep until the evening had rolled round again.

As good as his word, Spike had strolled through the doors of the ward almost immediately after sunset, his black leather duster and tight pants sending several women swooning at the nurse's station. His arms had been weighed down by bouquets of flowers, a string of helium balloons, and a cerise teddy bear that was easily twice the size of the baby. He had wasted little time in lifting the child from her hospital crib, cradling her with a kind of expert ease that both surprised and delighted Dawn. They discussed potential names, laughed at every half comical grimace their daughter executed, and marvelled at how seemingly flawless she appeared even down to the individual wrinkles etched into her knuckles. Spike had gazed at the infant with such open adoration that Dawn knew there wasn't an aspect of her care that she could not trust him with.

Spike had only departed, with great reluctance, when the nurse in charge of the nightshift had bustled into Dawn's room and dismissed him with a scowl and a few curt words regarding the proper end to visiting hours. Rolling his eyes, Spike kissed his girlfriend and daughter goodbye for the second time that day, and Dawn had once again been left alone to feel her way through the minefield that was the first twenty-four hours of parenthood.

As she lay in the darkness, contemplating the newest turn her life had taken whilst listening intently and with a new sense of paranoia to the soft breaths of her daughter, Dawn's eyelids fluttered closed. For now she would sleep, and greet the challenges of the days ahead as they came.

x-x-x

In the cool darkness, Buffy lay inexplicably awake, despite the weariness that ran down to her very bones. Beside her, Angel slept soundly, his lips parted and his brow furrowed as though even in slumber he could be pensive. They had discussed the bizarre and disconcerting events of the day at length over a bucket of fried chicken, but had failed to reach a conclusion other than that Giles' help was much needed. After several hours of mindless television, they had relented and practically crawled upstairs to their bedroom, both too tired to prepare for bed more than by kicking off their shoes and pants. Angel had succumbed to sleep within minutes, but it seemed that nothing Buffy did would allow her mind to switch off.

The display on the alarm clock read just after twelve, and Buffy let out a quiet sigh as she entertained the idea of performing a sweep of the local graveyards. However, Buffy failed to move a single muscle, still and almost unblinking in the silence of the wee small hours of the morning.

She shot a further glance at Angel, amused to see a trickle of drool beginning to run from the corner of his lips, before she returned her gaze back to the clock. Buffy let out a strangled gasp as her eyes locked with those of another- narrowed and brimming with malice. The Slayer shot up in bed, pressing her back against the headboard and kicking at the tangle of sheets about her legs. Slamming her palm to her chest, Buffy struggled to regain control over her breathing, and stared wide-eyed into the face of the devil.

Lucy regarded the Slayer with her head cocked to one side, an almost smile flirting with her lips before her expression became once more impassive.

"Shame on you, Slayer, to be caught unaware," the thing wearing the child's face teased, finally grinning and exhibiting two rows of small, pearly white teeth. Buffy felt sick to her stomach, but she gulped down the bile rising in the back of her throat and stared down the creature with determination.

"What do you want?" Buffy hissed, relieved to feel her heart rate beginning to slow to a more normal rhythm. She stole a sly look at Angel, who had failed to stir, and briefly considered raising her voice or somehow nudging him into consciousness so as not to face her adversary alone. Seeming to read her thoughts, Lucy shook her head, braids whipping from side to side.

"Ah, ah," she chided, circling the bed in a predatory move and drawing to a standstill almost by Angel's side, "if you think I'd allow as much, you're more delusional than I first thought."

"I said what do you want?" Buffy repeated, her tone becoming increasingly dangerous. She gripped the sheets beneath her palms unconsciously, trying to ignore the relentless thrum of her heart beneath her chest as she stared at the creature before her. In her time as the Slayer, Buffy had faced many adversaries, but not one could quite compare to the Father of all evil, despite the seemingly innocent guise it now wore.

Lucy pursed her lips and planted both hands on her hips in a gesture that would have been oddly comical were she indeed a child. Instead, however, Buffy found the stance unnerving, and she bit her tongue discretely in order to ground herself. Buffy knew that there could be only one reason that the devil had come calling and, in the next moment, her very worst fears were confirmed.

Lucy beamed, rocking on her heels excitedly as she whispered with hands clasped to her breast, "Oh Buffy, you know why I'm here. Your bill has come due… and it's time to pay up."

x-x-x

"Tick, tock…"

Dawn gasped as she shot up, hands flailing in front of her and her heart leaping into her mouth. Her head whipped around as she surveyed her alien surroundings, suddenly recalling in a rush where she was and exactly how she had come to be there. Filled with a sense of inexplicable unease, Dawn scrambled across the lumpy hospital mattress and made her way across the room to the plastic bassinet. Peering inside, she breathed a sigh of relief as her gaze fell upon the face of her daughter. Dawn watched, entranced, as each breath escaped the tiny puckered lips, and after a few moments, once she was truly satisfied by the child's wellbeing, she made her way back over to her bed and perched on the edge.

She sucked in a few steadying breaths, finding that the alarm that had filled her upon waking had yet to dissipate. Although Dawn knew that she had been in the throes of some kind of nightmare, she was unable to recall the exact happenings of the dream, aside from one specific detail; a child's voice, reverberating in her head with a sing-song quality.

Dawn shuddered and, deciding that the desire to rest had all but deserted her, she reached above her bed in order to flick on the lamp that hung there. Her finger jabbed at the switch and. although there was an audible click, the room was not illuminated as Dawn expected. With a frown, she stabbed at the button repeatedly, unwilling to admit defeat.

That was when the first terrified scream ricocheted throughout the hospital corridors.

x-x-x

"No…" Buffy hissed, tears beginning to pool in the corners of her eyes as she regarded the child, who stared back in a predatory manner.

"Oh Buffy, you knew this day would come," Lucy retorted, although her tone was quite patient. Buffy blinked, digesting the almost sympathetic undercurrent to the thing's voice.

"Please…" Buffy began, pushing aside the sheets and swinging her legs over the side of the bed. She leaned towards the creature now, her fear reserved only for her family and friends.

"Take me instead," Buffy pleaded, stumbling from her bed and dropping to her knees. She crawled across the carpet, both hands clutching desperately at the hem of Lucy's dress. The child shook her head, eyes wide and sombre.

"You know I can't do that," she lamented, seeming genuinely pained by this fact. Buffy hiccupped a dry sob, raking both hands through her hair and tugging at the roots until a few strands came free in her hands.

"Please!" Buffy screamed, the tears coursing freely now. They slid down the apples of her cheeks and splashed onto the front of her tank top, soaking the fabric and rendering it almost opaque.

Lucy heaved a sigh, small shoulders lifting and falling rapidly with the gesture. The moonlight filtered into the room through a chink in the hastily drawn curtains, and it fell across the creature in a single shaft which illuminated her smile.

As Lucy opened her mouth, Buffy almost groaned out loud as a stabbing pain assailed her heart. She recognised quickly the searing blade of her own guilt, and she reached out to the devil in the darkness in a final, silent plea.

With a toss of her head, Lucy whispered, "It is already done."

x-x-x

Dawn snatched the baby from the cot, snaring a tangle of blankets along with the tiny body. She pressed the child close to her chest, one hand snaking around to support the back of her neck. The infant stirred and snuffled but did not fully wake, for which Dawn was thankful as the subsequent screams began.

Attempting to control her frenzied breathing, Dawn racked her brains for a potential way out of the maternity ward that would not lead her past the nurse's station. With some difficulty, she blocked out the cries ringing out around her, and slipped her bare feet into the sandals positioned at the side of her bed.

She pressed her back against the wall and edged her way to the door, knowing without a doubt that their best chance of survival lay beyond the room they were confined in. She uttered soft, soothing shushing sounds in her daughter's ear, and continued to inch towards her escape route.

A further panicked cry from somewhere nearby rang out, and a single tear descended Dawn's cheek as she contemplated the terrible yet very real possibility that she would not be able to protect her child from whatever lay in wait. Swallowing hard, Dawn pushed aside the thoughts, refusing to allow them to overthrow her reason. Instead, she eased the heavy wooden door open, and peeked out into the corridor.

The overhead lights had extinguished, and the entire floor was now deathly silent. Dawn trembled uncontrollably, her heart aching as she considered the possibilities of what had become of the other occupants of the ward, and the staff that cared for them. Sucking in a breath, Dawn struggled to control her wayward, shaking limbs. With a final glance down at the baby in her arms, so innocent and trusting, Dawn found her resolve and, in the next moment, she flung herself out of the doorway and down the corridor towards the emergency exit.

Pain exploded throughout her entire body, but Dawn ignored the aches and niggles that plagued her and pushed down her head in a bid to run faster. She heard the sounds of something in pursuit almost immediately, and a sob escaped her as the clacking of talons against tile accompanied by animalistic growls followed behind.

In her arms, the baby began to wriggle and fret, great sobs wracking her little body as she sensed her mother's distress. Her fist gripped the fabric of Dawn's nightshirt, and the girl was spurred on, driven by the inherent instinct of a mother to protect her offspring at all cost.

Although her legs felt like jelly, Dawn ran faster than she was certain she ever had in all her eighteen years. She pushed through the door of the fire escape with hot, fetid breath upon the back of her neck, and she let out a scream that half stuck in her throat. The door swung closed behind her, and Dawn backed up against the stairwell, waiting for the creature to come crashing through.

When nothing happened, Dawn continued to stare suspiciously at the door for several seconds, before she turned on her heel and fled down the first flight of steps. The baby bounced in her arms, although Dawn cradled her to her chest in her best efforts to protect her fragile neck and head. She reached the bottom of the staircase in less than twenty seconds, and she wasted no time in propelling herself through the door that would lead her onto the ward below her own. Dawn ran through the corridor, her feet slapping noisily against the floor, and her tears were renewed as she heard an unmistakable roar.

Dawn skidded to a halt amongst rows of plastic backed chairs, struggling to get her bearings and calculate where the nearest exit was positioned. She almost wept with joy as she realised that she was within feet of one of the several entrances to the parking lot, and Dawn took off again at speed as the vicious growls drew ever closer.

With the automatic door in sight, Dawn's heart surged, and she forced her aching legs to carry her the final few steps towards safety. Her body connected with the double doors, and they failed to open.

"No…" Dawn yelped, slapping the glass uselessly with one palm and heaving a sob. She shook her head, stealing a glance at her baby, who regarded her mother with wide eyes. Dawn drew a breath sharply and, in that one moment, her mind and heart were filled with such perfect clarity that she was at peace.

Slowly, Dawn leaned down towards the bundle in her arms and brushed her lips against the child's soft forehead. Tears splashed down the bridge of her nose and landed on the baby's head, but she did not cry out, instead continued to gaze up at her mother.

"I will always love you," Dawn whispered, cupping the baby's head with one hand. Her heartbeat slowed in her chest and Dawn's breathing evened out, no longer ragged and noisy. The fear ebbed away, leaving in place only a staunch resolve that would never waver.

Planting a final kiss on the tip of her daughter's nose, Dawn flew across the corridor and tugged at the handle of the janitor's closet. Mercifully, the door yielded and opened, revealing a space dominated by mops and shelves of cleaning fluid. Securing the blankets around the baby, Dawn crouched down and laid her gently on the floor, before pulling a large bucket in front of her to obscure her body from view. Straightening up, Dawn closed the door as quietly as possible then took off in the opposite direction at speed. The pain that tore at the body was no longer of consequence, and Dawn attempted to close her mind off to it.

As she ran down the long corridor, she became aware once again of the sounds of panting, and nails clacking against the floor; this time she rejoiced, knowing that whatever the creature was, it had inadvertently moved past her daughter's hiding place. Dawn pressed on with renewed purpose until her lungs burned, her thighs ached, and finally she reached a dead end.

Dawn rubbed her palm across the smooth plaster of the wall before resting her forehead against it, accepting defeat and now almost embracing it.

In a painstakingly slow movement, Dawn turned around, and her gaze fell upon her attacker. Tears coursed freely down her cheeks and Dawn squeezed her eyelids tight shut, struggling to hold onto the image of her daughter's face in her mind and nothing else.

When the creature eventually pounced, Dawn Summers did not even have time to scream; but, from the recesses of a janitor's closet nearby, a child wailed helplessly.