Breathing deeply, slowly, nuzzling Patrick's neck, spooning, Kevin was reluctant to sleep. They fit really well together. Kevin wasn't a snuggler, but Patrick had pulled Kevin's arm across his body and burrowed into him, chatting quietly, lazily...until sleep overtook him. Poor boy. He'd had an energetic night. Kevin smiled as he realized he'd found a way to knock Patrick out after sex. Make him do all the work. It was good to know.
Kevin loved his smell. They'd taken a quick shower together because...well...they'd been very messy and they'd used whatever generic shit Patrick had to soap each other off, but still, he could smell Patrick's skin underneath the scent. He was still slightly sweaty but it was clean and really quite lovely. A little salty, a little musky...very sexy. Maybe he should wake Patrick up...No. Sleeping like this was part of the fun too. Something they'd never been able to do before. He wanted to know if Patrick was a snorer, or a wriggler, or worse, a cover-hog. And how did he wake up? Slow and groggy, grumpy and mean, sweet and snuggly, horny...so many delightful options. And wake-up sex in a comfortable bed would be something to look forward to. Lots and lots of new experiences to store away in the Patrick vault.
This weekend almost hadn't happened, which, given what an awesome day this had turned out to be, would have been a fucking tragedy. Jon's plans kept changing, as he vacillated between attending the conference in San Diego now or waiting till a later one up in Seattle, giving him the opportunity to visit family and friends. Kevin had deliberately kept silent on the topic. He didn't trust himself not to sound too eager for Jon to go. It was only yesterday morning that Jon had finally made his decision, and Kevin had been able to breathe a sigh of relief. Of course, nothing was ever straight forward with Patrick. He thought he'd make him deliriously happy with the news, but apparently Patrick had become a little weary of playing the waiting game. And Kevin didn't blame him. It couldn't be much fun not being in control of your own time, always dependent on someone else to set the agenda...it wasn't fair to keep asking him to make all the accommodations around his and Jon's schedule. So, the plans to have Patrick all to himself for a whole day and night had turned into something a little different, and somehow he had ended up at a rugby match for the afternoon, and more notably, had finally met some of Patrick's little entourage.
Kevin couldn't be bothered with watching rugby, but it had seemed really important to Patrick that he NOT change his plans to support his best friend's first rugby game, and frankly, the surprise on Patrick's face when Kevin had suggested they go together, out in public, for the first time...well, that was worth having to watch a bunch of men grunting and groaning as they wrestled for a stupid ball and shoved their heads up each other's arses...gayest game ever. Another benefit was seeing Patrick's dopey, happy face as Kevin ingratiated himself with his friends. Jesus. They were supposed to be colleagues but anyone seeing Patrick looking at Kevin would have known right away that there was something going on. Not that Kevin minded too much. He liked Patrick looking at him that way. He liked impressing him. And it was ridiculously easy to do so. He could have made up any words to describe the different rugby positions and none of Patrick's friends would be any the wiser, but Patrick gazed at him as if he was finding the cure to cancer. And of course Kevin knew Patrick had a weakness for Kevin singing... so teaching the lads a football chant was sure to win him a few more points. And it had. Fuck yeah.
Patrick had hauled him off, dragging him by the hand, the hugest grin on his face, and pinned him against the wall off the bleachers. His intention was clear as his eyes dropped to stare at Kevin's mouth. Kevin had seen enough American teen movies to know what one was supposed to do with bleachers, and he was happy to help Patrick re-create a lost high school moment, especially as it involved Patrick's delicious mouth and gripping fingers...God, he loved it when Patrick held his head as if he was holding him so he couldn't escape, so caught up in his passion that he wanted to lock Kevin to him tightly. And though it was probably the most chaste kiss they'd ever shared...just lips, closed mouths...kissing Patrick, out in public, almost as if they belonged together...that was a huge fucking turn on. He'd hardened almost instantly, and pulled Patrick even closer, but the commotion on the field had distracted Patrick, and the little make out session had ended a little too prematurely for Kevin's liking. Still, it meant they could make their escape because Patrick was hardly going to drag Kevin back to his friends, with Kevin sporting a huge boner.
Not that Kevin didn't like Patrick's friends. They seemed like a decent lot, even if they were a strange mix. Dom, the one on the rugby field, the one Patrick had told him he'd once 'hooked up' with, vague as that term was, he was the one he didn't get to meet and the one he was, for obvious reasons, most curious about. But Doris and Agustin seemed pleasant enough. And the big guy, Eddie, he was a laugh. Outspoken, brash. At first Kevin wasn't sure if Eddie was coming on to him, with the aggressive flirting and innuendos. But...he got a sense there was something between Agustin and Eddie, so he decided to assume it was all in jest. He was obviously there as Eddie's friend and not Patrick's because he had no clue as to the relationship between them, hence the awkward question about Kevin's dating status. Kevin didn't want to look at Patrick in that moment, didn't want to see anything in his face that might spoil the day. So, he'd calmly told Eddie that yes, he had a boyfriend, away on business, and yes, he had photos to show. Thankfully Dom made some big play on the field at that point and everyone got distracted.
That was the only mention of Jon made all day, and Kevin felt that there was almost an unspoken understanding between him and Patrick that today, this one day, was just about them. No thoughts of Jon were going to be allowed to intrude, allowed to spoil anything. It was simply him and Patrick spending what would hopefully be a very normal, ordinary day together, doing the sorts of things that people who...liked...each other did to get to know each other better. And part of that included hanging out with friends.
Strangely, though it was Kevin who faced their potential censure and disdain, it was Patrick who was the more reluctant of the two of them to go through with the plans for the rugby game.
Walking up to Patrick's flat that morning, a little late, he had seen Patrick sitting on his stoop. Fucking hell. He was so fucking sweet, and so obviously nervous. Kevin could almost feel the waves of tension radiating off him. Well he was nervous too. This was almost like a first date, but the stakes were a lot higher if it didn't go well. What if outside of the office, in the real world, they just didn't connect the same way? Would they call this a failed experiment and keep on fucking, or would everything just come to an end? Patrick wasn't good with silences, and so far just the mechanics of having an affair had kept the time they had for intimate conversation very limited. What if he was a disappointment to Patrick? What if he wasn't the man that Patrick thought he was? Though that seemed hardly possible. Kevin had been as open with Patrick as he'd ever been with anyone. If anyone could know him, it was Patrick. What was he so worried about anyway? If things didn't work out it wasn't as if the world would come to a crashing end. In most ways, it would make things a lot simpler if they discovered that they had nothing to say to each other without the time constraints usually imposed on them, or if they found that sex without a ticking clock was just...ordinary. Or if they just annoyed the hell out of each other. That would actually be the best result of all.
So this was basically a win-win situation. If they had a good day, then...great. If they had a bad day, then...there would be no more headaches. Literally.
But in the end, they hadn't had a good day. They'd had a fucking great day. It started a little awkwardly, with a strange in-between hug, one that close friends might share, but definitely not colleagues, and at Kevin's suggestion they moved swiftly to a bar so they could try to dull the twanging nerves with the soothing effect of booze. Once there, he could see Patrick was in 'fill-the-silence' mode as he searched desperately for a safe topic to talk about, other than work, other than their relationship, other than the fact that one of them had a boyfriend...and at first he'd picked on one that Kevin wasn't interested in pursuing. Romford. Home. Not something he liked to think about or talk about. Obviously Patrick had no concept of the British class system if he though someone like him, with his accent, could come from pretty Wimbledon. And frankly, as in any town, there were parts of Wimbledon that weren't that great, but still the shittiness of his birthplace would shock Patrick, who like most Americans thought everyone from England grew up in fucking Downton Abbey. Fortunately the topic had turned to something that Kevin WAS comfortable talking about...games. Infinite possibilities when talking about games. He fucking loved them.
They'd eventually got round to talking about their own game, the one they were supposed to be working on, which was a discussion long past due they both agreed.
'Which card would you pick to describe yourself, back when you came out?' Patrick had asked as they threw out ideas for their game characters.
'Jesus. I don't know. I don't even know when I came out. There wasn't really anyone for me to come out to, except my dad I suppose' Kevin had answered, sipping his beer.
'How can that be?' Patrick was confused. 'Did everybody else just...know? That doesn't seem possible. I mean I knew when I met you, but I imagine most people don't just assume that about you. I can't picture you as some openly gay happy teenager flying the rainbow flag. I mean back then, was anyone like that? Were you like that?'
'Fuck no. I don't imagine most people I grew up with had any idea. They probably still don't. But...it's not as if I care if they do or not. I pretty much hope to never see any of them ever again so...' Kevin shrugged.
'Wow. Really? You never go home to visit? Ever?' Patrick pressed.
'I usually stay in London if I go back. Meet up with friends I still keep in touch with, from uni, college to you, and...other people, family... there. Essex and London are close.'
'So you have no ties with Romford at all?'
'Not really. Not anymore. I think the town was pretty glad to be shot of me too.' Kevin laughed.
'Shot of you?'
'Rid of me. I forgot you don't speak English' Kevin teased him.
'Kevin Matheson...were you a trouble maker?' Patrick asked, obviously fascinated. Kevin grinned.
'It's a fucking miracle I made it through school without being locked up in Juvey I was so much fucking trouble. Drinking, shoplifting...you name it, I probably did it. Never got officially caught though, or at least, never so that it would stick, which drove my dad mental. He just didn't know how to control me and he was happy that I was smart enough to get into university despite messing about in school so much.' Kevin couldn't believe he was confessing any of this.
'Really.' Patrick could hardly contain himself with astonishment.
'Yes. Yes I was a horrible little bastard of a teenager' he continued.
And then, surprisingly, he found himself talking about his parents, which was an area he usually avoided like the plague. People never seemed to know what to say when they found out your mum had run out. They were used to absentee fathers, but there was something deeply...shaming...about being left behind by your mum. They were supposed to be the one person who loved you no matter what, put you first above everything. Men were dicks and didn't change much when they became fathers, but women...all that motherly instinct stuff...if your mum left it meant you weren't lovable, didn't it? At least that's what it felt like to a teenager. Jesus...how did they get into this heavy shit. Not that Patrick responded badly. If anything, his obvious sympathy for the young Kevin was comforting, and the shit didn't feel quite so heavy anymore. Maybe there was some truth to the old adage 'a problem shared is a problem halved'. He certainly felt a little lighter about it. Maybe it helped that Patrick wasn't so close to his own parents, and definitely had some of his own mommy issues. He didn't seem to judge much which was nice, and even though he was intensely curious, it didn't feel intrusive.
But whatever. It had been a nice chat and he hadn't scared Patrick away with his tales of a dark childhood which was a good thing. And it felt easy, natural to go from deep emotional crap to silly banter again. Nothing forced, nothing strained...just...easy.
They'd tried to get back to talking about their smart-phone game on the way to the rugby match, but they were too easily distracted by swapping tales of actual people they knew or had met that were the inspiration for the characters they were supposed to be developing, and the conversation had disintegrated into a competition for who could come up with the most ridiculous name for their game. By the end of the bus ride they had made no progress on the design concepts or on the name, but they'd had a fucking good laugh.
The joking had carried on through to after the rugby game too, when they'd got back to Patrick's apartment. It was funny how Americans loved old things. In England there were old buildings all over the place, even in Romford, and that went along with old plumbing, no air conditioning, tiny windows...all the things he had found he was more than happy to never have to put up with again when he got the US. But to Americans, anything that looked like it had been standing for more than 50 years was considered something of an heirloom. The more shabby a place looked, the more people like Patrick and Jon went into raptures. So Kevin could see why Patrick would be so proud of his apartment. It was old. Creaking stairs. Plaster walls...hipster west coast tech nerd paradise. It definitely had a nice warm vibe to it. Kevin could see the appeal of that. And it had a comfortable lived in feel too, which wasn't surprising since Patrick and Agustin had lived here for eight years. Jesus, that was longer than he'd lived in any one place since he'd left Romford.
Going through Patrick's stuff was fascinating. In the good old days of CDs and DVDs you could learn a lot about someone by their music and film collection, but those were long gone and it was becoming rarer to see shelves of books too. Kevin had a kindle and if he had time to read he'd just download a book wherever he was. He even read the newspaper online. His whole life was pretty much in the cloud now. But Patrick, or maybe Agustin, had books. And it was interesting to see what he bought and kept. The classics, obviously, and to give Patrick credit, these look like they had actually been read, with broken spines and dog eared pages. Then some intriguing selections of gay history books...probably bought during an ardent activist phase. But the best...the very best, was the small collection of self help book.
'Finding the Boyfriend Within' Kevin flipped the book over to read the blurb. '...a remarkably practical and helpful guide in the quest for self-discovery for the thousands of gay men who despair of ever being in a committed relationship'
Oh Patrick. This was pure gold. This was just so...him. He had no fucking clue how gorgeous he was. He read books to help him find a boyfriend, without realizing that he could basically go into any bar and just by showing the tiniest bit of confidence, just by letting out some of that sensuality that Kevin was lucky enough to experience, he could have anyone he wanted. Kevin couldn't let this go. It might not be wise to bring up a book about commitment on a date with the man you were cheating on your boyfriend with. But...he couldn't let it go. It was too precious. And fortunately the man had a sense of humor. Some people couldn't laugh at themselves but Patrick...well he was very good at that.
'Finding the Boyfriend Within' He read out loud, while Patrick was preparing them drinks. Just from the derisive tone he used he knew Patrick would be cringing. Poor bugger.
'Ahhhh. No. Back on the shelf, please' He instructed from the kitchen.
'All you need to know is that it takes a real man to admit that he reads self help books, at times.' He continued bravely.
'Sorry. I can't rip my eyes from these pages. This is suggesting that you...you take yourself out on a date. Have you...have you done that' Kevin inquired, all innocence, but the game was up and Patrick soon stopped trying to retain any dignity in the face of Kevin's ridicule. He joined right in. God...he was so fucking cute when he smiled like that, when he was half embarrassed, half happy. Every fucking emotion so clearly written on his face. Kevin just loved it. Making him smile. Seeing him happy and relaxed. So fucking cute. But hot too. Really, really hot. And they had a whole night ahead of them where they could just go and explore all that hotness. Shit...from laughing to horny in 5 seconds. Patrick fucking Murray.
Just the thought of what they could do in the next 12 hours was making Kevin hard. He'd moved in on Patrick, walked right up to him and kissed him. What a lovely luxury. It couldn't get any better. To just kiss the man you...wanted to fuck, and know you had all night ahead of you to kiss him as often as you wanted to, as he'd let you, as you could last. But Patrick had other ideas. He'd had one request. The only one he'd really made all day, and Kevin couldn't say no to him. Didn't even want to because he was right.
'We actually get to take our time tonight, right?' He'd asked, serious all of a sudden, his eyes roaming Kevin's face. 'So...why don't we?'
Kevin had been wrong. It could get better. Lying on the sofa with Patrick wrapped in his arms, Patrick's soft hair against his face, Patrick's long body pressed into his, Patrick's wondering fingers stroking his arm...watching some crazy sexy cartoon. This was the best it could get. And Patrick, on his home turf...he was a fucking rock star. Even when Kevin's phone buzzed, even though it was obvious who the call was from, he hardly skipped a beat. He pulled Kevin right back into THEM. He didn't ask about the call, he didn't make a scene, he just brought it back to the two of them, lying on a sofa on a Saturday night, watching TV. Kevin had felt such a flood of emotion. He knew what the emotion was called, but he wasn't going to fucking name it. He couldn't. Not now. Now wasn't the time. This was just too perfect the way it was.
But he knew what he WAS going to do. Something that he wanted to do for Patrick. Something that was his way, without words, of showing Patrick a little of what he was feeling tonight. Hopefully he'd understand what it meant. Thought if he didn't that might be better. Yeah...it would definitely be better. And anyway...maybe Patrick wouldn't even want to know how Kevin was feeling. Maybe he liked things the way they were. He never pushed for anything more, so...Kevin wouldn't make a big deal about this. It was just a small gesture.
And then Kevin realized he'd been wrong AGAIN, because lying in bed with Patrick, lying on top of him, making out with him like they'd just discovered kissing, rocking against him and feeling Patrick hard against him, feeling Patrick's hands wondering all over his body...this was the best it could get. And not because he was about to have sex, but because it had been a great day and he was about to have sex with Patrick.
He pulled away from Patrick's searching mouth and leaned over to pick up a condom. Placing it between his teeth he stared at Patrick's grinning face for a second before he bent down and transferred the condom to Patrick's mouth. Patrick still thought he knew what that meant and continued to stare up at Kevin expectantly, waiting for him to set the pace.
'Your turn' Kevin said quietly, deliberately.
Patrick's look of delighted surprise was so totally worth it. But it had lasted mere seconds. And then no hesitation, no questions, he'd enthusiastically risen to the occasion. And christ...the man could fuck. Kevin shouldn't have been surprised since Patrick had obviously been more accustomed to topping before he'd met him, but...he still wasn't prepared for the full impact that was Patrick Murray when he was focussed and intent on driving you fucking crazy. The feeling of being possessed, being filled by someone who was so desperate to be inside you, whose eyes glazed over with ecstasy at every deepening thrust...god, it was the best aphrodisiac just to watch Patrick Murray sweat and know he just couldn't get enough. At first there was lots of licking and kissing and as always, Patrick knew just how hard to bite Kevin's lips, just how to tease and tantalize with his tongue in order to drive Kevin wild. But soon the rhythm, the pace, got too fast for them to keep their mouths together and all they could do was grip each other tightly as Patrick continued to thrust into him, deeper, faster, wilder. Over and over and over...hitting that lovely spot inside him that was pushing him so close to the edge so very fast.
Kevin felt himself nearing his own orgasm, without Patrick even laying a hand on him which was mind-blowing in itself, but he really wanted them to cum together.
'Look at me...look at me...' he urged, wanting to watch Patrick as he came.
'Are you going to cum?' Patrick asked, practically out of his mind with pleasure.
'Yeah...I'm gonna, yeah...fuck...I'm going to cum...' he barely managed to get the words out.
Patrick had pulled out instantly and snapping off the condom, he brought them both off, his hand gripping them both tightly...so...good. They came with Patrick gasping into Kevin's mouth as Kevin groaned his pleasure into Patrick's. This was so...fucking...good. He couldn't remember coming so hard before, so completely lost in his own world of pleasure but at the same time so aware of every one of Patrick's gasps, every touch of his mouth every stroke of his hand. God...this was so perfect. His mind was totally blown. He could barely catch his breath but at the same time he didn't want to lose Patrick's mouth, and he didn't want to lose Patrick's weight on top of him. It was pure heaven to feel this connection, and he didn't want to let it go. Patrick laughed at his expression, which must have been one of shock, because he really could hardly believe what had just happened. Jesus. Patrick fucking Murray and his hidden fucking depths.
It was hard to drag themselves to the shower, but they had cum all over themselves and needed to get clean, and anyway, washing up was it's own kind of pleasure. Not sexual, because they were literally shagged out, but still, sweet and intimate as they soaped each other off, kissing gently.
And so Kevin found himself cuddling up to Patrick, breathing in his scent, listening to him breathe, watching him sleep. He wouldn't wake Patrick up even though he was beginning to feel aroused. He would wait until the morning. And after he would cook Patrick a proper English breakfast, and they could pretend for a little bit longer that this was real life. And then...he would go home.
Fuck! Jon. He'd called. Shit. Shit. Shit.
No. He wasn't going to let this spoil this night. Jon would be expecting a call back, and he would definitely try calling Kevin again if Kevin didn't get back to him. He would expect Kevin to want to know how the conference went. He would expect Kevin to want to know how his day went. He would expect Kevin to be interested in him. Kevin owed him that much.
Kevin pulled away from the sleeping Patrick carefully. He reached for his phone and hit Jon's number as he got out of bed. With any luck he'd get voicemail, leave a quick message and get back into bed. But his luck had run out for the night. Jon answered the phone and Kevin shut the bedroom door quietly behind him as he started a conversation he'd had many times before. But his mind was on the man sleeping in the room next door. He couldn't wait to get back and snuggle up against him again. And he couldn't wait to see what Patrick would wake up like. His money was on sweet and sunny. With hopefully some playful and horny thrown in. Kevin smiled to himself as the conversation with Jon continued.
This had been a great fucking day.