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Announcer: Last time on Total Pokemon Action, the contestants faced the biker movie. There was a lot of pain and explosions with this genre. The contestants had to dress like bikers, drive a motorcycle, and finally survive a bar fight. The contestants had a lot of pain in the challenges. During the final challenge, the bar fight, Spiro was sent in first and received the most pain from the bikers, even after everyone else was sent in with him. In the end, Sonan got invincibility for hiding. Farra told the guys the truth about Carman, and she was eliminated. Spiro, who was now comatose, was also sent packing. We are at the final five and that means we're getting closer to the end. Who will win today? Find out right now on Total…Pokemon…ACTION!
(Disclaimer: I do not own the songs used in this chapter. All rights to their respective owners)
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The final five contestants had all woken up and went to the breakfast tent for their food. As they entered, they were all amazed at what they saw…there was actual food! Waffles, bacon, eggs, pancakes, it was like a buffet!
"What's with all of the food?" asked Mason as Mew and Victini floated inside.
"We wanted to congratulate the five of you for surviving and making it far", Mew explained.
"So…they're not poisoned?" asked Sonan.
"Nope."
"Laced?" Darren queried.
"Negative."
"Hmm…okay, then!" said Farra as she immediately started eating.
Mason, Sonan, and Darren started eating as well, with Striker just watching with a deadpan expression.
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Mason: Final five…I already knew that I was gonna make it, my only competition now are a giraffe with love issues, a nervous cocoon, a boring ass sea lion, and a talking doll. I already know this game is mine.
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Sonan: I'm in the final five! I can't believe it! I just hope that I can win this.
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Darren: I never thought I'd make it this far. Heck, I thought I would be voted out 5th or 6th. But…while I'm in the final five, I might as well try to win I guess.
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Farra: I'm in the final five with Striker! Um…I mean I'm glad that Striker's with me. Let's just hope he still isn't afraid of me.
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Striker: Once again, the cocoon makes it to the finals. I can't believe I actually did it. I'm shocked, to be honest. I thought that I would be a threat to some p-. Oh what am I saying? I'm a cocoon, of course they'd keep me in! It's kinda sad for me if you think about it. *sighs*
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Everyone, excluding Striker, was now lying on their back from eating so much of the food.
"Well…now that you're all done eating, it's time for today's genre and challenge", said Mew.
"What is it?" asked Darren, while holding his stomach.
"The parody movie!" announced Victini.
"Awesome!" Sonan cheered, while the others simply rose a brow.
"Now, let's get on with the challenges", said Mew.
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"Okay, your first challenge is to sing some song parodies", said Mew, holding a box. "You must choose a song out of the box and whoever does the best at singing the won they choose gets an advantage in the
next challenge."
Everyone took turns getting their song.
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Striker: What the heck is this?
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Sonan: Awesome!
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Farra: Um…
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Darren: I have no idea…
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Mason: I hate singing…and this song
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Mew and Victini were sitting at a table in front of a stage.
"Alright, Striker's first", Mew introduced as the Metapod hopped onto the on the stage and looked down in confusion. "How did we get here?"
"Don't ask questions, just tell us the song you're singing and sing it", said Mew.
"Okay, okay, I'm singing…."Round" by Mike Luce, a parody of "Down" by Jay Sean."
"The song that makes fun of fat chicks…proceed", said Victini.
Striker sighed before beginning to sing his song.
"Baby you're so round, round, round, round, round
Round, Round
You must weigh at least 300 pounds
Pounds, Pounds
Ohhh, Ohhhh
Look at your rolls
Over your belt they overflow
Put on some clothes
I wanna see you show self-control
But you're intertwined with me
And I'm trying to get away
But you just keep finding me
As I'm making my escape
So baby don't hate me
I won't let you date me
Don't try and debate me
Not unless you lose 200 pounds
Don't be offended
I think that you're splendid
You are just too round, round, round, round, round
Round, Round
You must weigh at least 300 pounds
Pounds, Pounds
Baby you're too round, round, round, round, round
Big as a tree
You're friends all say you're hot
I disagree
So please go away
Hey
Cause this club is not a diner or buffet
But you're intertwined with me
And I'm trying to get away
But you just keep finding me
As I'm making my escape
So baby don't hate me
I won't let you date me
Don't try and debate me
Not unless you lose 200 pounds
Don't be offended
I think that you're splendid
You are just too round, round, round, round, round
Round, Round
You must weigh at least 300 pounds
Plus another 3
Down your back I wanna ski
The scale for her is the Richter
Cause she's the size of Tennessee
I'm bold, pardon me
She'll eat every part of me
How can I not be scared of her
Her legs are made of cottage cheese
I'm fightin' with this girl
Cause she will not let me go
Don't she listen, is she stupid
Can't she hear me tell her no
Ain't no way she's leaving here with me
I guarantee I'll disagree
The girl is just too round to let her get with me
Yeaaahhhh
So baby don't hate me
I won't let you date me
Don't try and debate me
Not unless you lose 200 pounds
Don't be offended
I think that you're splendid
You are just too round, round, round, round, round
Round, Round
You must weigh at least 300 pounds
Pounds, Pounds
Oooo, Ooooo
At least 300 pounds
Oooooo, Oooooo…"
"That was… uh… great Striker", Mew stated, rubbing the back of his head.
"I just made fun of fat chicks! That's not good in my book", said Striker.
"It is in ours", Victini replied. "You get a 9 out of 10."
Striker sighed, "Alright."
"Sonan, you're next!"
Sonan bounded up onto the stage with a smile on his face.
"What's your song?" asked Mew.
"Minecraft Style" by CaptainSparklez, a parody of "Gangnam Style" by PSY", he responded.
"Okay then, let it begin", said Mew.
"Diggin' Minecraft Style…
Minecraft Style
Diggin' a hole just one time until I score this
Strike rich on diamonds, iron, gold, and build our decked out fortress
All we need is just a bit of luck to not abort this
Runnin' low, we can't afford this
Dungeons under here
Just the last time a group of creepers came out over there
Blew up a vein of diamonds then chased us all out of there
A spider army dropped down from the roof into our hair
Ran back to fresh air
This ain't your land, you're gonna get banned
So you know, hey
When you plan to go, hey
When you're diggin', you'd better listen
So you know, hey
When they gonna show, hey
Makin' sure you're all prepared before you go-o-o-o-o-o
Diggin' Minecraft Style
Minecraft Style
Dig, dig, dig, dig, diggin' Minecraft Style
Minecraft Style
Dig, dig, dig, dig, diggin' Minecraft Style
Ay, sexy piggy
Dig, dig, dig, dig, diggin' Minecraft Style
Ay, sexy piggy
Dig, dig, dig, dig,
Back on the ground we layin' redstone through the forest
To wire our monster traps so all the zombies will ignore us
We built this city block by block and we don't welcome tourists
But they still come lookin' for us
Like a sauna here
We built a portal to the nether, lava everywhere
Zombie pigs and ghasts flyin' all around so tread with care
Best you craft some armor and exchange that for the clothes you wear
While you're under there
Lava flowin', those lakes are glowin'
Down below, hey
You should probably go, hey
But you're ready, your arms are steady
Grab your bow, hey
Shoot the fatal blow, hey
Run away now 'cause you missed, you were too slow-o-o-o-o-o
Diggin' Minecraft Style
Minecraft Style
Dig, dig, dig, dig, diggin' Minecraft Style
Minecraft Style
Dig, dig, dig, dig, diggin' Minecraft Style
Ay, sexy piggy
Dig, dig, dig, dig, diggin' Minecraft Style
Ay, sexy piggy
Dig, dig, dig, dig,
Dig some more
Until you hit the core
Diamonds, diamonds baby that's what we are lookin' for
Dig some more
Until you hit the core
When you find 'em baby then you know it's time to soar
Ain't a game we're playin'
Diggin' Minecraft Style
Ay, sexy piggy
Diggin' Minecraft Style"
"Awesome!" said Mew. "You got everything right…but I hate Minecraft...all of those weird block people. 3 out of 10."
"Really?" asked Sonan, out of breath.
"Yeah…next!"
Farra came out.
"I'm gonna sing…"Katy Perry Firework Parody" by barelypolitical", said Farra.
"That song is so lame", Victini commented. "We're not even gonna listen to it, you're out!"
Farra sighed in relief. "Thank you."
"Next!" shouted Mew.
Darren came out sighing. "I'm singing "White n' Nerdy" by Weird Al Yankovic, a parody of "Ridin' Dirty."
"Interesting..." commented Mew. "And it suits you because…you're fur is white and…sorta nerdy."
"Thanks a lot", Darren deadpanned before clearing his throat.
"They see me mowin'
My front lawn
I know they're all thinking
I'm so White N' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Can't you see I'm white n' nerdy
Look at me I'm white n' nerdy!
I wanna roll with-
The gangsters
But so far they all think
I'm too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
I'm just too white n' nerdy
Really, really white n' nerdy
First in my class here at M.I.T.
Got skills, I'm a Champion of DND
MC Escher that's my favorite MC
Keep your 40
I'll just have an Earl Grey tea
My rims never spin to the contrary
You'll find they're quite stationary
All of my action figures are cherry
Steven Hawking's in my library
My MySpace page is all totally pimped out
I got people begging for my top 8 spaces
Yo I know Pi to a thousand places
Ain't got no grills but I still wear braces
I order all of my sandwiches with mayonnaise
I'm a whiz at minesweeper I can play for days
Once you see my sweet moves you're gonna stay amazed,
my fingers movin' so fast I'll set the place ablaze
There's no killer app I haven't run
At Pascal, well, I'm number 1
Do vector calculus just for fun
I ain't got a gat but I gotta soldering gun
Happy days is my favorite theme song
I can sure kick your butt in a game of ping pong
I'll ace any trivia quiz you bring on
I'm fluent in Java Script as well as Klingon
They see me roll on, my Segway!
I know in my heart they think I'm
white n' nerdy!
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Can't you see I'm white n' nerdy
Look at me I'm white n' nerdy
I'd like to roll with-
The gangsters
Although it's apparent I'm too
White n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
I'm just too white n' nerdy
How'd I get so white n' nerdy?
I've been browsing, inspectin'
X-men comics you know I collect 'em
The pens in my pocket
I must protect 'em
my ergonomic keyboard never leaves me bored
Shopping online for deals on some writable media
I edit Wikipedia
I memorized Holy Grail really well
I can recite it right now and have you ROTFLOL
I got a business doing websites
When my friends need some code who do they call?
I do HTML for them all
Even made a homepage for my dog!
Yo! Got myself a fanny pack
they were having a sale down at the GAP
Spend my nights with a roll of bubble wrap
POP POP! Hope no one sees me gettin' freaky!
I'm nerdy in the extreme and whiter than sour cream
I was in AV club and Glee club and even the chess team!
Only question I ever thought was hard
Was do I like Kirk or do I like Picard?
I spend every weekend
at the renaissance fair
I got my name on my underwear!
They see me strollin'
They laughin'
And rollin' their eyes 'cause
I'm so white n' nerdy
Just because I'm white n' nerdy
Just because I'm white n' nerdy
All because I'm white n' nerdy
Holy cow I'm white n' nerdy
I wanna bowl with-
the gangsters
but oh well it's obvious I'm
white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
Think I'm just too white n' nerdy
I'm just too white n' nerdy
Look at me I'm white n' nerdy!"
"Darren, you did great and bonus points for actually keeping a straight face about it", said Mew. 9 out of 10."
"Thanks", said Darren as he hopped off of the stage.
"Mason! You're the last one", said Mew.
"I'm not going", said Mason. "It's a Justin Bibarel parody."
"Yep…you're definitely not singing", Victini agreed.
Mew argued, "If it's a parody, it's not the real thing, though."
"So what? It still has something to do with him, so no", said Victini.
Mew groaned, "Fine. Mason, you're out", said Mew
"Good", said Mason, hopping off the stage. "Now what's the next challenge?"
"Okay, the second challenge is for each of you to…go to elimination", said Mew.
"Really?" asked Darren, shocked.
"Just kidding," the New Species Pokémon stated. "The second challenge is to arrange the legendaries' dating statuses."
"What does that have to do with parodies?" asked Striker.
"We each have our own shows or upcoming shows", Victini explained. "And they're all parodies…so they count. So you simply have to try and tell us who you think dated who first all the way to the latest couple."
"How the hell are we even supposed to know all of that?!" Striker exclaimed.
"Guessing is good, too," Mew shrugged.
"Um…okay, I guess?" Farra replied before beginning to think of possibilities.
"Alright, Sonan, you're first", said Mew. "Whaddya got?"
The Wynaut gave him a look, "I know nothing."
"…okay then," Mew replied. "Mason?"
"I don't give a fuck..." the Absol responded with a glare.
"Come on! Just say anything!" said Victini. "Farra, please tell us you have something."
The Girafarig hummed, "Um… Arceus and Giratina are married and Mewtwo and Deoxys are going out… I think. Reshiram and Zekrom are married, too, I think. Raikou and Suicune started going out and still kinda are, but Suicune keeps cheating, then, um…Rayquaza-
"Incorrect!" said Mew. "You were on a roll though. Striker."
The Metapod had no idea, but began. "Okay, starting after Suicune and Raikou, Articuno-
"Nope!" interrupted Mew, causing Striker to sigh. "Darren."
"Okay… uh… starting after Suicune and Raikou, Virizion and Victini hooked up, but then broke up afterwards. Then Victini started dating Jirachi, and Virizion and Cobalion started an on and off thing. Mew, you started dating Celebi, but then you had sex with Cresselia while she was with Darkrai, making both of you break up. Terrakion and Heatran started going out and then Dialga and Palkia went out, too. Keldeo went out with Meloetta, but they broke up and he started having a thing for… Suicune, I think," the Dewgong listed, causing looks of shock to form on everyone's faces. said Darren. "Then Zapdos and Moltres dated for a little bit, then Articuno started having feelings for Tornadus. Rayquaza started dating Latias and Regirock initially dated Registeel, but then he dumped her. Then, Mew gained a big crush on Shay-"
"OKAY!" Mew interrupted. "That's enough, you get invincibility. Please, just stop…"
"But-"
"No!" Mew responded. "Just… you win. Challenge is over."
Victini had to stifle his laugh, tears starting to form in his eyes. "How… how did you know all of this?" he asked the Dewgong.
"A friend showed me some kind of blog apparently written by Mesprit that pretty much detailed how all of your relationships were going," Darren explained. "It was pretty interesting."
"Yeah, I'm gonna need a link to that once this is all over," Farra commented.
Mew twitched before holding his head in embarrassment. "Fucking Mesprit!"
Wiping tears from his eyes, Victini stated, "Alright, alright, time for elimination!"
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Everyone arrived at the ceremony, with Mew still looking embarrassed and Victini smirking.
"Okay everyone it's been a pretty sucky day, which is great for us because we caused it", Victini chuckled. "Now, you all know the drill."
"Farra, Striker, and Darren, you guys are safe", an unenthused Mew stated. "Mason, Sonan, you guys are the final two-"
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Mason: I love my hypnosis…it sucks that it didn't work on Farra or the doll.
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"The final contestant safe is…
…
…
…
…
…
…
…
…
…Mason."
"What?" asked Sonan. "Why me?"
"You're a threat. Duh..." Mason stated. "Seriously, you should know this by now."
"Oh, well thanks then", said Sonan as he went toward the Lame-O-Sine.
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YEAH! FINAL FOUR! NO! SONAN! DAMN YOU MASON! This chapter revealed some things and it didn't really go with parody I don't think…oh well, who cares? Mew and Victini don't know what they're doing! I hope you enjoyed this chapter and thank you guys for still reading and reviewing it. I was planning on putting this story on a hiatus until I finished my others, but you guys kept telling me how good I was doing and…just thank you guys. Will Mason actually win? Will Striker get voted out soon? Will Mew and Victini get over their embarrassment? Find out next time on Total…Pokemon…ACTION!