Justin knew that there was going to be hell to pay when he finally made it home, but it wasn't like it was his fault that the Chander's car broke down on the way home. He also knew that it didn't matter whether or not it was his fault his dad was still going to bitch because he wasn't the perfect son in his father's little fantasy world, and his mother would when they fought and take his father's side, all the while making him feel like the worst person in the world. After the fighting was all over and he was grounded and sent to his room for the night his little sister would sneak into his room to sleep while his mother swallowed a handful of pills and his father drank a bottle of whiskey.
He could almost remember a time when his family hadn't been so broken, he could almost remember a time when people laughed and smiled in his house. Everything had changed when his older brother killed himself. Jace had been 17 when he locked himself in his room on Christmas Eve and slashed his wrists. Justin and his father had to break down the door and Justin desperately held t-shirts to his big brother's wrists while his father left the room to call 911. The ironic thing about the whole situation was that Jace hadn't died because he slashed his wrists he had died from an infection that he got while he was in the hospital.
These days Justin could barely keep his head above the water. He looked over at his best friend, Daphne, and couldn't help the slight smile that crossed his face. He was grateful that she had dragged him out and had fun. He had met and went home with the hottest guy, named said hot guy's kid, and lost his virginity all in one night.
He let all thoughts of the hot guy, Brian, fade from his mind as they pulled up to his house. This time as he looked over at Daphne he couldn't help that sadness that crossed his face.
"You know that if you ever need a place to crash you can always sleep in our spare bedroom. Lord knows that my parents love you, one might even be able to make the argument that they love you more than me," Daphne joked lightly when she saw the sadness cross his face. He reached over and gave her a big hug and kissed her forehead.
"It's only because I help you study and they know that I'm gay so they know for sure that I don't want in your pants. If I was straight they would probably hate me," Justin jokingly pointed out before he squared his shoulders. "See you later Daph, wish me luck."
She gave him a weak smile as he left the car and walked up to his front door. The house was oddly quiet, usually at this time of night his father was still up watching TV. As he walked further into the house he hoped that maybe his parents wouldn't be up or wake up while he snuck up to his room, and maybe just maybe this time there wouldn't be a big blowup even though he was only 15 minutes past curfew. Justin should have known that these were just pipe dreams and that would never happen.
"What time is it?" he heard his father snap out from the living room in an angered tone. Great the old man was already angry before he got home and now things were going to be twice as bad as usual.
"It's 3:30 AM," I answered quickly hoping to get this over and go to bed, I had a big day tomorrow.
"So you do know how to read a clock, and chose to be late deliberately! Your mother told you to be in this house by 2 o'clock! Well, what do you have to say for yourself?!" he shouted in my face as my mother entered the room, with tears already in her eyes.
"It wasn't my fault-" I started to sat, but I should have known better he didn't care that I was late, he would have found some reason to yell at me whether or not I was on time. Lately it seemed like my father was only happy when he was yelling at me. My mom was always telling me not to take it personally that he was just stressed out from work and it was easier for him to take it out on me than her or Molly because I was a man. I thought that it was a bunch of bullshit.
"I think it's funny that somehow nothing is ever your fault!" He shouted back at me before my mother interjected, "Maybe we should hear him out."
"Be quiet, Jennifer!" he snapped at her and she fell silent and tears streamed down her face. "From now on you will only leave this house to go to school and then straight home! Now go to your room while your mother and I discuss the rest of your punishment!"
I knew that they weren't really going to discuss anything. My mother was going to take her pills and pretend that we were all still perfect and my father was going to drink himself to sleep, but I ran up to my room anyway grateful that there wouldn't be more fighting for the night I was sore and exhausted. When I got to my room Molly was already lying in my bed with a wild look in her eyes.
"Hey, Mollusk, what's wrong?" Justin asked his baby sister as he sat next to her on the bed. As soon as he was finished sitting his sister launched herself at him and started sobbing in to his shoulder. He quickly wrapped his arms around her and started rubbing her back. "Hey, hey, what's wrong?" he asked more urgently before, slightly taken aback by her behavior.
"Am I stupid, Jus?" she asked him in a small voice, and his blood ran cold. Justin always knew that eventually his father wasn't going to be satisfied with only using him to take out his frustrations on, but he had always held out some tiny speck of hope that he would never treat his only daughter that way. After all Molly was the miracle child, and a girl at that. He didn't mean that in a bad way but Craig Taylor held certain old fashioned views about the world, and the fact that you treated women like it was still the 1940s was one of them.
"You are one of the smartest 8 year olds I know. Where would get the idea that you were stupid? Did someone say something to you at school?" Justin asked hoping that that was it, but knowing that it had been their father that had said something to his little sister about her intelligence. Not that it truly surprised him. In his father's mind women were only there to raise the children and do the housework.
"No. Daddy said that I was stupid because I accidentally spelled a word wrong in my report," she cried dejectedly.
Anger coursed through Justin's body with a surprising intensity. How could a father look at his own child and call her stupid all that while maintaining that he was the perfect father and they were the perfect family? Justin quickly pushed these thoughts aside in order to get his little sister calmed down enough to sleep. He would deal with his parents later.
"Shh….. Mollusk, it's okay," he said gently, and rubbed her back softly all the while keeping up the soft soothing noises. Eventually she fell asleep against him. He carefully transferred her to lay against his pillows so he could change into his pajamas.
As Justin lay with his sister snuggled into his side he couldn't help but think about the guy that he had met that night. He knew it was foolish and that they had just met but he really liked Brian, but he wasn't stupid enough to think that anything would happen between them. He knew going into it that it was a onetime thing and that he would probably never see the other man again, and that even if he did he wouldn't have been able to do anything about it. He already took enough of a risk even being on Liberty Ave, if his father found out that he had not only went there but been with another man his father would kill him.
Across town Brian Kinney rolled over in his sleep, and suddenly realized he shouldn't have been able to roll that far over with someone else in his bed, and shot up only to find the trick from earlier gone. He was surprised, virgins were usually needy and clingy. Well at least he wouldn't have to deal with the annoyance of kicking him out in the morning, he rolled over and went back to sleep.