Disclaimer: All recognizable Rizzoli & Isles characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners including, but not limited to Tess Gerritsen, Janet Tamaro and TNT. The original characters and plot are the property of the author of this fan fiction story. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material. No financial gain is associated with the publishing of this story. No copyright infringement is intended.
Author's Note: I edited the previous chapters. The typos were driving me nuts! I can't guarantee there won't be problems with this chapter. But there will be angst. Your reviews have been fabulous. -DKC
Slow and Steady – Chapter 17
Jane was sitting on the couch in Maura's office sorting through hundreds of phone records. She and the medical examiner had finished takeout for lunch and then got back to work on the case they'd been working. Maura was researching something that Jane didn't understand, despite the doctor attempting to explain it to her.
"Dr. Isles?" Susie Chang poked her head in the door.
"Yes?" Maura looked up from her laptop at her assistant while Jane continued what she was doing.
"There's a Dr. Nash on the phone. He said you would want to talk to him?"
"Oh," Maura's face dropped and her change in tone caught Jane's attention.
Jane watched Maura pick up the phone and knew something was up, but she had no idea who Dr. Nash was. She remembered nearly everything Maura ever said to her. She didn't remember Maura ever mentioning a Dr. Nash.
"This is Dr. Isles," Maura said into the receiver. "Oh, hello. Yes, I, um, could I call you back?"
Jane was now very much interested in the conversation Maura was having. Maura seemed embarrassed, as if she was hiding something. The tone of her voice told Jane everything she needed to know.
"I need to check my schedule and I will get back to you."
Maura told this Dr. Nash that she had forgotten he would be in town and apologized multiple times. The call ended with her promising to call him. She hung up the phone and immediately went back to her research on the laptop.
"What was that about?" Jane asked.
"Oh, I, um…" Maura's stammering was giving way to redness across the visible parts of her chest. Hives would surely follow.
"You're trying to think of how to lie to me," Jane charged.
"I…no!" Maura became defensive.
"Maur, what's going on?" Jane put down the papers she was looking through and concentrated solely on Maura.
"When I was in New York for the pathology conference I met this man, a doctor from Seattle and I told him to call me if he was ever in Boston and we could have dinner or drinks."
"Did you sleep with him?" Jane asked in an accusatory way.
"I…" Maura couldn't even look at Jane.
"You did!"
"It wasn't serious. It was just sex," Maura explained.
"So, what? He's in town and he's calling because he'd like to do it again?" Jane's tone was growing increasingly aggressive.
"Yes. No. I don't know!" Maura was becoming frustrated.
"Call him back, tell him you're free and would love to fuck," Jane stood up, gathering the phone records.
"Jane, don't do this," Maura said, standing up as well and walking out from behind her desk.
"Don't do what? Don't get mad because some guy that you hardly know just called and wants to bang you? Jesus, Maura!" the detective was incensed and heading for the door.
The doctor got to the door before Jane and closed it, effectively blocking the detective's exit. Maura stood in front of it with her arms folded. She was frustrated with herself for not turning the guy down immediately on the phone, especially with Jane listening.
"I'll call him back and tell him I can't," she submitted.
"You don't have to on my behalf," Jane huffed, pacing.
"Jane…" Maura pleaded. "You are all I want."
At that, Jane looked up at Maura with tears forming in her eyes. They hadn't talked about what they were and that meant they didn't ever say if they could or should date other people. She was kicking herself now for never forcing herself to talk to Maura about it.
"I can't," Jane began, her voice cracking with emotion. "I can't watch you be with other people."
"I am not with other people, Jane. I want you. I am with you," the doctor took a step toward Jane, not wanting to push Jane into closeness she may not want.
"Are you? What the hell are we, Maur? Fuck buddies? Best friends who get each other off? Best friends who have eye sex, undressing each other with our eyes every minute of every fucking day?" Jane ran her hands through her mess of hair as she stopped pacing and looked at Maura.
"I…I don't know," the doctor said at an almost indecipherable volume.
Maura took another step toward Jane, close enough that she could easily reach out and touch her. Jane kept her eyes on Maura.
"Yeah, well, if you don't know then you might as well call him back and do whatever you want," Jane muttered as she made her way to the door.
Tears were streaming down Maura's face. She was stunned and couldn't form words of protest as she watched Jane leaving her office.
"Jane…" the broken M.E. whispered in her now empty office.
The only thought materializing in Maura's mind—what have you done?—kept repeating as if a broken record. What was she supposed to do now?