CHAPTER 5

One minute Noel watching as Daryl prepared to leave with Rick to finally take care of their hostage situation, and the next the hostage was gone and Shane was bloody and ranting about a teenage boy sneaking up on him. Noel and Daryl exchanged a look.

Bullshit.

After that there was waiting. Then when Daryl came back with Glenn they said they found Randall.

"He was a walker."

"Well did you find the walker that bit him?" Hershel asked, clearly concerned.

"That's the thing he wasn't bit." Noel mind zoned out after that. All she could think about was how maybe this could have been avoided had she exposed Jenner's secret. She looked up as Daryl was leaving again.

Noel joined him, Glenn and Andrea on the porch. They all froze as they saw what was coming towards them: walkers, everywhere. Moments passed as they decided what to do.

Stay and fight, it is.

Noel aided Hershel in guarding the front of the house, picking off as many as they could but the walkers just kept coming. Too much was happening; Rick and Shane hadn't returned, Carl was missing, the barn was on fire and there were walkers everywhere you looked.

The next thing she knew she was being pulled into the truck with Hershel, Rick and Carl watching as the farm was overrun with the undead. Her eyes frantically searched for him, his bike, anything. When she found nothing she tried to convince herself that it was because he got away, away from the farm. He was safe; he had to be.

No one was on the highway though. Rick said they'd be here. That Lori would be here. That Daryl would be here. They weren't. She walked slowly behind Carl as he cried about his mother. Noel wondered if she would be crying over Daryl soon, she definitely felt like crying.

They were just standing around waiting. More waiting. Noel never hated something so much in her entire life. Waiting. She didn't have patience to begin with. This, this was just torture. She'd gladly take a beating any day then have to endure this.

The not knowing was the worst; whether he was dead or alive or something in between, whether anyone was. And then she heard it, the familiar rumble of Merles loud walker-attracting motorcycle. She'd never been so thankful for something so loud and just plain obnoxious.

And there he was, looking as perfect as ever covered in blood with a terrified Carol behind him. Noel couldn't move, her face frozen in shock as Daryl shook Ricks hand and made his way over to her. He stood in front of her, searching for wounds, waiting for her to come back to reality.

Once she did there were tears streaming down her face and he quickly wiped them away, pulling her into a mind-numbing kiss that made her legs shaky. He pulled away just as quickly as he came but kept his hand in hers as the group discussed their plans.

Noel quickly noticed how Daryl wouldn't look at her. She backtracked and searched for something she did wrong. She came up empty. She squeezed Daryl's hand hoping to read him but his eyes remained trained on their leader.

When the group had stopped for the night, the questions started. Noel was hoping to avoid this topic of conversation all together. Her and Rick stared at each other for quite a while before she nodded and he spoke,

"We're all infected." Silence.

"What?" Daryl was the first to speak.

"At the CDC, Jenner told us…" Rick looked to Noel now, "Whatever it is, we all carry it." Her eyes remained on Rick avoiding the stares through the silence.

"And you never said anything?" Carol broke the silence, glancing back and forth between Noel and Rick.

"Would it have made a difference?" Rick argued.

"You knew this whole time?" Glenn asked eyes trained on Noel before looking to Rick. More silence.

"We didn't know for sure," Noel spoke up, her voice shaky, "Jenner was…"

"That wasn't your call!" Glenn was getting angrier.

"Well we–I thought it best if people didn't know." The conversation was clearly over and Noel avoided everyone's eyes as she followed Daryl into the woods to collect firewood. She watch as his tense body maneuvered through the trees, collecting branches, acting like she wasn't there.

And then when they were far enough away, he stopped, turning on his heals, throwing the sticks down in a huff and charging her. He stopped when her back hit a tree and Noel could practically feel the anger radiating off of him. "What tha hell is wrong wit ya?" he yelled.

"Daryl… please… he told me not to tell." He was pacing with his head in his hands, pulling at then ends of his hair. "To be completely honest, I forgot…" Her voice was shaking while unshed tears collected in her eyes, "until you found Randall… please stop… I'm so sorry."

Daryl came forward and his fists flamed down on either side of her head. The tears came now, escaping as she fought to keep her composure. "Yer fuckin' sorry! About that?" He was screaming in her face, "Yeah! Fuck you 'n Rick fer keeping secrets."

He pushed away from the tree, his head back in his hands, fighting his own internal battles. "Are ya fuckin' stupid?" This she was not expecting. "Back at the farm!" he screamed, "What tha hell wer ya thinkin'?" Her eyes were wide, back at the farm? She was with Hershel in front of the house killing walkers; she even stayed there while everyone made their escape. Noel mentally slapped herself.

I stayed, she thought to herself, oh God no wonder he's pissed.

"Ya got a fuckin' death wish er somethin'?" She quickly shook her head and took a step towards him. "DON'T!" his voice boomed at her. It caught her off guard; he'd never yelled at her like that before, it scared her.

She stumbled back and she hit the tree again, her face fell into her hands as she sobbed. He spoke again, softer this time, but the anger was still clear in his voice, "So fuckin' pissed… I don't… don't wanna hurt ya…" he said through pants.

She looked up as he tried to collect himself, failing miserably. He let his anger out on the nearest tree, slamming his fists against it yelling, "What – tha – hell – wer – ya – thinkin'?" until he was satisfied. He leaned back against the tree with his head hung and his bloody hands resting on his thighs.

Noel quickly regained her courage and walked over to him, taking his face in her hands, and kissing him tenderly. "What tha hell would I 'ave done witout ya?" Daryl asked as his eyes filled with tears and his chest rose and fell at a rapid pace. She pulled him into an embrace, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck, pressing her lips to his cheek.

She relaxed when he hugged her back, pulling her as close as he could. Noel could still feel his breath coming in fast against her ear. What he said next was so soft she almost didn't hear it but as he pulled tighter she knew she had heard right.

"I fuckin' love ya," he breathed.