Ciao! I'm Italy - Northern Italy to be exact! And I'm about to tell you about something really exciting that happened to me!

One day I was trying to cook pasta, but the stovetop stopped working and the water wouldn't get hot! Now you know that you can't cook pasta without hot water!

I decided to call on Germany because he's good at fixing things! It's just like Grandpa Rome always says, "in heaven the engineers are German"!

"Germany! Germany, I need your helpl fixing the stove! Germany!"

He wouldn't open the door when I knocked, so I decided to just open it myself! He forgot to lock it like he normally does!

I saw Germany in there NAKED! And he had a sausage in his hands! And I then realized that it was HIS sausage!

"Germany, what are you doing?" I ask. My nose was bleeding like crazy!

Germany put on his really angry face and roared and pulled his underwear up and pushed me out.

"GET ZHE FICK OUT! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU NOT TO ENTER MY BEDROOM WITHOUT KNOCKING!"

"But I did knock Germany! I knocked about three dozen times!"

"YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO ENTER MY ROOM EVER UNLESS I ANSWER THE DOOR!"

"But Germany, I just want to know what you're doing... I mean what were you doing to your sausage?"

Germany's face turned a really funny shade of red! "ZAT'S NONE OF YOUR GOTT VERDAMMT BUSINESS!"

Germany slammed the door on me.

Man, that thing he was doing with his sausage is awfully suspicious! It made me giggle and blush! Maybe he has some sort of embarrassing medical issue? Maybe he has a rash? Maybe he was inspecting it for herpes?

Maybe I should do the same thing with my own sausage to make sure I don't have any funny ailments!

I went back in the kitchen and I pull my underwear down. I couldn't tell if there is anything wrong with my sausage. I decided to look in that book that big brother France gave me as a birthday present, it has plenty of pictures of mens' sausages in it!

The first picture I saw looked different from mine. It was covered all over the opening by the part called the foreskin. I looked at my own and the foreskin was pulled all the way down!

OH NO! I tried pushing the foreskin down over the tip of my penis, again and again, but it just wouldn't stay!

But everytime I pulled my hand over the foreskin, it feels so GOOD!

Hee hee my sausage likes to be touched! No wonder Germany touches his a lot!

I rubbed my hand over it again and again, this time just to feel how good it feels! I giggled, and it felt like I was doing something really bad and naughty somehow, that's how good it felt!

Now the only thing that could make it feel better would be... PASTA!

But too bad! I couldn't cook any pasta! I had to use dry pasta :(

I took some dry pieces of fettuccine and rubbed them over my sausage. It felt FEALLY GOOD! I laughed at how it tickled me happy until the fettuccine broke.

Aw... why does dry pasta have to be so brittle?

I took a handful of dry spaghetti. Hey, maybe it will feel good if I shove it up my ass!

I stick my fingers into tomato sauce and slip them into my asshole to make it wide enough to stick the spaghetti in.

I rubbed the spaghetti around up inside me... OOOH! Who knew pasta could be enjoyable in more ways than one!

But then some of the spaghetti tips broke off and poked me inside my ass and it HURT! OW pasta can be so prickly!

I need some nice tough al dente cooked noodles shoved up there. And wrapped around my dong. That would be so kinky... and fun!

BUT GERMANY WAS TOO BUSY PLAYING WITH HIS SAUSAGE TO FIX THE STOVE SO I COULD COOK PASTA!

I started crying. My sausage was all big and hard now and it wanted some good PASTA!

Germany was probably in his room having a good time with a wurst...

HEY! Maybe one of his dried up wurst sausages, which taste all yucky like jerky, would feel good up there!

I dug into the food cabinets and took a skinny dried wurst. I dipped it into some mustard so that it would slip in easier.

The mustard felt spicy inside my rectum! But I liked it! Only problem, the wurst wasn't big enough. I wanted a BIG FAT SAUSAGE like Germany's!

So I got a fatter sausage out. It looked too big to fit in my little butthole, but with lots of spicy mustard I got it in!

My ass tried to squeeze it, it felt so big and hard, like I really had to go poop! I was trying to poop it out but I had a hard time doing that, but my penis seemed to like that!

WOW! I have never gotten off to the feeling of having to take a dump before!

I shoved it up higher until it was all the way in. I then remembered something!

I had a can of Chef Boyardee spaghetti pasta in the cabinets!

America likes Chef Boyardee a lot, even though it isn't as good as fresh pasta, but oh well, pasta is PASTA! And it's cooked pasta too!

I opened the can and stuck my own sausage in. I waggled it around and felt all those nice tender little noodles on it while I tried to shit out Germany's fat wurst. I heaved, going "Ve! Ve! Ve!" until it felt like I was just about to take a dump, and my penis felt like it was going to explode but in a GOOD way at the same time.

At that moment I screamed:

"PASTAAAA!" (there were actually more A's and !'s than this but doc manager likes to delete them!)

It felt like I went pee pee in the can, except it felt much better than pissing! And thicker too!

And the sausage came out like a poo poo on the floor!

Germany came in, all dressed up. I guess he was done making his sausage feel good for now.

"Italy, Gott verdammt, you ruined my... um, moment."

"Oh, hi, Germany! I was just taking care of my sausage like you were!"

"Vhat zhe..." Germany gasped when he saw the sausage and the canned tomato mixed with pasteurized process cheese sauce all over the kitchen floor!"

"VHAT IS ZHE MEANING OF ZHIS? VHY IS ZHERE PASTA SAUCE ALL OVER THE FLOOR? AND VHAT IN GOTT'S NAME DID YOU DO VIS MY VURST?"

Uh oh. Looks like Germany is angry! I had better get my white flag out and scram before he gets through with cleaning the kitchen!