Turn to Me

By Wonko

Part 12

The battle to retake the heart of Olivia Spencer would be waged on the ground floor, Natalia decided after returning from early Mass that Sunday. The thought of negotiating Olivia up the farmhouse's narrow stairs made her feel weary. Much easier to move all the things she'd need downstairs - especially when she had a couple of captive helpers on hand.

"Raphael, my darling boy," she breezed as she served him and Emma their breakfasts. "Have I mentioned lately how much I love you?"

Rafe swallowed a mouthful of bacon and a swig of orange juice. "Okay, what do you want?"

"How do you know I want anything?"

He rolled his eyes. "Ma," he deadpanned. "Come on."

Natalia smiled warmly. "Okay, okay," she admitted. "I need you to help me move a little furniture. Olivia's bed needs to be in the living room for the next few months while she recovers."

Emma frowned. "Why?"

Natalia turned to her and smoothed her hair back. "Mommy's hurt her leg, baby," she said gently. "So she won't be able to climb the stairs for a little while."

"Can I help?" She looked up at her with bright, hopeful eyes.

"You know," Rafe said, grabbing another piece of toast from a plate in the middle of the table. "I think your mom's bed might be a little bit heavy for you, but maybe you could help us pick out some of her favourite books or something. It's pretty boring when you just get out of hospital. I should know."

Emma nodded eagerly, and so by ten o'clock the three of them were in Olivia's bedroom. Rafe, with the aid of a couple of screwdrivers and a bit of light swearing - which Natalia magnanimously chose to ignore - managed to get Olivia's bedframe dismantled in record time while Natalia and Emma pored over her bookcase. Emma decided on three books in the end - A Stephen King, a John Grisham and a Patricia Cornwell. Natalia made a mental note to loan Olivia some better books, but smiled at Emma and accepted her choices without protest.

Rearranging the furniture in the living room was exhausting work, and by the time they were done Natalia had worn down the meagre amount of energy she'd recovered after the previous night's restless sleep. Olivia's bed absolutely dominated the room. They'd had to move nearly every other piece of furniture out to make room for it, but they'd kept the TV, a chair and the sofa. The latter was pushed up against the side wall, parallel to the bed. Natalia figured she might need to be available in the night when Olivia got home, and had resigned herself to sleeping on the couch for the foreseeable future. At least it was a comfortable couch, although she doubted she'd be saying that after a week or so of sleeping on it.

Emma was taking advantage of Natalia's brief lapse in concentration by jumping on the bed, giggling as Rafe tackled her and began to tickle her mercilessly. For a moment Natalia let herself smile, trying to pretend just for a second or two that everything was normal.

"Okay Em," she said at last. "Go and get your stuff. We're going out."

Emma turned a two hundred watt smile onto her. "Are we going to see mommy?" Natalia nodded. "Yay!" Emma squealed, dashing past her to collect her things from her room. Rafe watched her go, then turned to his mother in time for him to see her mask briefly slip. The quiet despair in her eyes made him deeply uncomfortable. His mother was the strongest person he knew. Things had to pretty bad for her to look like that.

"You okay ma?" he asked gently, slipping his arm around her shoulder. She tensed under his touch.

"No," she conceded. "Not really." She closed her eyes for a long moment, then smiled tightly at him. "Well, you get your coat too," she said, a little too brightly. "We'll be late for visiting."

It was amazing, Natalia reflected as Emma disengaged herself from her hand and ran towards her mother - despite everything that was going on, despite the troubles and the heartache and the loss, the sight of Olivia still made her heart flutter. There was just something about the other woman that called out to her. She hadn't felt right since she'd left the hospital the day before - now she was back and something deep inside her had settled into its proper place again.

"Hey Jellybean," Olivia said, her face breaking into a wide smile. Then she spotted Rafe and a look of deep surprise flashed across her features. "You got off?" she asked, a little incredulously.

Rafe was confused for a second, until he realised that Olivia obviously didn't remember him being sentenced. "Uh no," he explained. "I went to jail and I just got out again."

Emma swatted her mother's shoulder lightly. "You know that mommy!" she admonished. Olivia's eyes met Natalia's over the girl's head.

You didn't tell her? Olivia's eyebrows seemed to say.

Natalia just shrugged a little helplessly. Olivia rolled her eyes.

"You're right," she said to Emma. "Mommy's just a little confused right now."

Emma reached up and touched the incision they'd made when trying to relieve the pressure in her skull straight after the accident. "You hit your head," she said softly.

Olivia nodded. "Yeah," she said. "And there are few things in there that are a little jumbled up right now, but you know what?" She tilted Emma's chin up. "I'm gonna be just fine."

Emma smiled. "I know," she said confidently. "Mama said so."

Olivia's eyebrows shot into her hairline. "Mama?" she asked, staring at Natalia.

"Oh," Emma said. "I forgot. You were asleep, but Natalia said it was all right..." She trailed off, her eyes flicking between Olivia and Natalia who were staring at each other.

"Emma, sweetie," Natalia said at last. "Could you maybe go to the machine and get me a soda?" She fished some change from her pockets.

Olivia continued glaring daggers at her until her daughter was out of earshot, then rounded on her. "She calls you mama?" she almost shouted. "What the hell?"

"Sssh, don't get overexcited," Natalia murmured, trying to soothe her.

"I'll get as excited as I want. What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Natalia pulled up a chair and sat by the bed. Rafe hovered behind her protectively. He hadn't seen this Olivia in a long time, and hadn't missed her.

"Look," Natalia said. "You don't remember the accident, but she does, okay? She was distraught. She thought you were gonna die, so yeah, when she asked if she could call me that I said yes. What was I supposed to do?"

Olivia ground her teeth but said nothing.

Natalia scraped her hands through her hair. "This is the deal," she said. "You and I live together with Emma. She sees me as a parent, and I love her like she's my own child. You must know that." She searched Olivia's eyes for a long moment before finally seeing something that seemed to satisfy her. "So you'll be mommy and I'll be mama, all right? For her sake."

Olivia sucked in her cheeks and seemed to be trying hard not to say the first thing that crossed her mind, which Natalia was sure would not have been kind. "Fine," she conceded at last. "But she's my kid. Just remember that."

Natalia tried not to let the hurt show in her eyes but she must have because Olivia suddenly looked troubled. "Hey," she said, reaching out to Natalia automatically. Natalia twined their fingers together and squeezed. "Don't give me that look," Olivia continued. "I don't remember seeing it before, but I know I don't like it." Her eyes travelled down to their linked hands and she frowned deeply, as if she were trying to work out a complicated anagram in her head. "Natalia-" she began questioningly, but the rest of her sentence was interrupted.

"How touching."

Natalia's head snapped round. Frank was standing in the doorway, a look of barely disguised disgust written all over his face. She squeezed Olivia's hand tighter instinctively. "Frank," she breathed. "What are you doing here?"

He stared at her, a mix of hurt, anger and a tiny bit of sorrow warring on his features. "Don't worry," he said. "I'm not here about that." He nodded his head towards their joined hands. Olivia's frown deepened.

"Th-then why are y-"

Frank held up his hand to stop her, and then looked at Rafe.

"I'm here for him."