Gibbs/Ziva fic: It Was Worth It
K+ Rating
Hurt/Comfort/Angst/Friendship
A/N: An episode tag to 'Revenge', just about what happened between Ziva looking down at Bodnar and her meeting with Vance.
Happy Birthday to a friend of mine, sorry it's a little late, I get confused between the time difference XD If you squint, there's a little Zibbs :)
Mistakes are mine
It Was Worth It
Ziva stood, bent over the side of the boat where she had fought with her father's killer. She was panting heavily, the adrenaline from the lethal fight was slowly fading to nothing and it was now not only her arm hurting. Her eyes remained focus on Bodnar's body, broken like the wooden crates that had cushioned his fall. His eyes remained open, reflecting the fire she had set earlier, part of Ziva got a little kick out of that, she was the last thing his conscious mind saw before he died. Speaking of eyes, she looked a little to the right and saw three pairs in particular staring up at her. Part of their expressions made of awe, Ziva always got her man; the other part of them, afraid. They knew she was deadly, but it still shocked them when she exampled it.
And that was when the adrenaline wore off.
Well done, Ziva said her unconscious, all that work to get away from the reputation Mossad gave you, and what do you do? You kill a man with your bare hands. '' It was worth it.'' she whispered, her voice hoarse, even to her own ears. She stepped back, hiding herself from the eyes that stared so hard at her. She winced and felt her back hitting a wall of some description and she slid down so she was sitting. She hurt everywhere. Her eyes closed and she bent forward, her head resting on her knees as she cradled the arm that was supposed to be in a sling. Ziva breathed in and out, her focus on her breathing taking her mind off of the pain shooting through various parts of her body. She stopped and sat up, her back rigid as a pair of heavy footsteps walked towards her. Her eyes found a pair of sapphires dancing in the amber glow and she looked at them defiantly.
The owner of the sapphire irises smirked that trademark half smirk and he walked over to Ziva and slid down so he was sitting next to her. They sat in silence, listening as a van pulled up and Ducky was giving orders to Palmer, listening to the fire roaring and dying, listening to the gentle waves rocking the boat they were on.
Normally if there was a silence, it was never the Team Leader that broke it, but, for a change, he did.
'' You okay?'' he asked softly, his voice penetrating the thick fog in Ziva's mind. It was a fog she was used to whenever death was concerned. This fog in particular was just a million thoughts flying through her mind at warp speed; should she have done what she did? What would happen now? How much trouble was she in? Should she have gone behind Gibbs' back to avenge her father? Should she have been sneaky around Tony? Should she have let them help? Was Bodnar dying too good of a punishment?
Ziva sighed, before a smile on her face appeared with a hoarse laugh, making the man next to her frown. '' Is that the first thing that pops to your head, Gibbs?'' she asked croakily. '' I have just killed a man with my bare hands, my feelings are a little irrelevant at the moment.''
The former Marine shook his head. '' No.''
Ziva looked at him, raising a split eyebrow in question. '' No?''
'' Your feelings matter, Ziver. The only ones I care about right now.'' came Gibbs' answer. He reached out his hand slowly, as if letting Ziva know he meant no harm in her volatile state, before wiping a trickle of blood that fell from her lip. '' So, I'll ask again.''
'' I am.. glad.'' said Ziva slowly. '' I am glad it is over. I am glad I will be able to sleep peacefully of a night time. I am glad Vance and his children have their closure. I am just glad.''
Gibbs smiled, before standing. '' Come on.'' he said, offering a hand.
Ziva took it and let Gibbs pull her up. As she stood, her bad arm twinged, making her wince. Gibbs wrapped an arm around her waist and helped her through the boat and to the Sedan.
'' Hey, Ziva.''
'' DiNozzo, McGee, take the Mini.'' instructed Gibbs, opening the passenger door for Ziva, ignoring her protests. Not caring if they heard or started to do as they were told, he climbed into the driver's seat and left the Harbour. Once they were on a main road, he sped up and before Ziva could register where they were going, they were outside Gibbs' house.
'' Gibbs?'' asked Ziva, as Gibbs opened the door to let her out. He remained silent as he led the way to his home.
Gibbs watched as Ziva stood uncomfortably in the door way. '' Living room. Sit.'' he said, before disappearing upstairs.
Ziva moved to the living room and she sat on the sofa, her eyes on the fireplace without a fire. She sat still in an attempt to lessen the pain going through her arm, but her nervousness had a habit of taking the form of fidgeting. And until Gibbs came back, that's all she did.
'' Ziver, relax.'' said Gibbs, his blue eyes laced with concern. He put a first aid kit down on the sofa next to her and opened it. He began to clean up Ziva's wounds and smirked when she looked at him.
'' Is this not Ducky's job?''
'' It's in his job description, yeah. But it's in mine to look after my agents, and I hate to break it to you, Ziva, but you're my agent. Not Mossad, regardless of your behaviour.'' said Gibbs, dabbing at Ziva's split lip, the way she looked at him just confirmed what inner turmoil was flying through her head.
'' Gi-''
'' Sure, it's not protocol in NCIS to kill the main suspect in a murder investigation. But that just makes it two of us that think a prison with wifi, half decent food and a warm bed is too good for some. I was never Mossad and I still did the same as you, does that make me a bad person?''
'' No.'' said Ziva, furious at the beginnings of tears in her eyes. '' You avenged your family, it was just.''
'' So, what makes you so different?'' he asked, his blue eyes boring into her watery brown.
'' I am trying to get rid of that label, Gibbs. I am trying to close that chapter of my life. I am no longer Mossad, yet-''
'' You received training for Mossad since day one. You learnt and created your own beliefs and morals. Ziv, you're not gonna forget them overnight. Could you imagine if you didn't kill Bodnar? It was driving you crazy, I know it was.''
Ziva blinked and a single tear fell down her cheek to be captured by Gibbs' calloused thumb. '' But-''
'' Ziva, what happened tonight, for me, for Vance, for Tony, Abby and McGee, nothing has changed. You're still Special Agent Ziva David, you took the oath, you went through the training. You're still my Special Agent.'' said Gibbs, pulling Ziva into a hug as her bottom lip began to tremble. He held her as she cried. He knew it wasn't out of guilt, he knew Ziva would stick her hand up if questioned and proudly so. If he had to pinpoint it, her tears were tears of relief and exhaustion.
'' There's no such thing as an exMarine, Ziva, everything I learnt in the Corps has stayed and will stay for life. And it's the same for you. That chapter is gone, but you still remember.''
Ziva sat up, her eyes red from the tears. '' Thank you, Gibbs.'' she said softly, pressing a kiss to his cheek.
'' Anytime, Ziver.'' said Gibbs, their eyes connected. A moment of silence passed before Gibbs stood. '' Now, do you want to close a chapter for someone else?'' he asked.
Ziva nodded and got to her feet. '' Yes.''
They drove to NCIS quickly, weaving effortlessly in and out of traffic. They squealed into the parking lot and shared a silent elevator ride up to the Director's floor. Ziva and Gibbs' eyes never losing connection. When they entered Vance's office, Ziva felt a warm gaze on her as she faced the Director.
'' Are you alright? Is it over?''
'' It is over.'' assured Ziva, soldier like with her reply. And it was over, ready for a new chapter to begin.