Chapter 3

When I was eight, I met my best friend Mary Lou Molnar. She is now, Mary Lou Stankovic. She and I have grown up together. Her parents lived down the street from mine. We did everything together. She was always Wendy when I was Peter Pan. We have laughed, and we have cried together. We lusted over the same guys, from Joe Morelli all the way to "Blackie Lawless" from General Hospital. Whenever something terrible happens, she is the one I turn to. It was her I called when my marriage to Dickie Orr quickly went south; she was there during it all. Through thick and thin; it was always her shoulder that I leaned upon. So, it was no surprise to her that I called. I did not have to say anything, really. Just, 'I need you'. She said, "Omigod! I will be right there."

I sat on the floor. I couldn't get up. I had to go to the bathroom, and I couldn't find the will, or the strength to do it. I would just have to figure something else out. I was waiting for this nightmare to go away and I would wake up. It would be a nice day, and everything would be normal. Someone knocked on my door. It was midnight. I was still sitting there. My stomach was cramping up. I was seriously considering the damage that would be made if I just went ahead and did the deed.

"Stephanie. Let me in. Its Mary Lou. I have cake."

Usually, that was enough to rattle my chain and make me get up, But I just couldn't. She finally took her spare key out and let herself in.

The door opened. "Hey Stephanie, are you alright?" She tripped over me. "Jesus, It's pitch dark in here! Was that you?" She switched on the hall light and found me on the floor. "Cripes, Stephanie do you need a doctor, what happened?"

All I had the energy to say was, "I need to pee!"

"Well, damn girl. Let's get you up, and into the bathroom. Don't you dare even think about peeing on me!"

Mary Lou helped me up and did not ask me anymore questions. 'Cause that's what girlfriends do'. They give you space to breathe until you want to talk. She helped me stumble into the bathroom. I closed the door, and stared at myself in the mirror trying to tell myself everything was going to be fine. It wasn't working. I felt sad, but at the same time, happy I was finally in the bathroom. It would have been really embarrassing to have tinkled on the rug. I took a deep breath and turned out the light. I trudged out into the living room. There was a birthday cake sitting on the table. It was pink and blue with little fluffy clouds and sugar-coated roses done in lavender and green. It said "Happy 50th, Myrtle !". I guess Myrtle didn't need the cake. I just stared at it. I didn't want birthday cake anymore. I didn't think it would cheer me up, or give me courage.

Why couldn't I be a normal girl? One that Joe could depend on. I wanted to be that person so bad my chest hurt. I was getting so worked up thinking about it, I was going to have an anxiety attack. I just wasn't ever going to be the person he talked about. I was always going to have something that kept things from being normal. Why? Because I was the girl who jumped off her parent's roof, and thought she could fly.

Mary Lou sat with me and I cried on her shoulder. I still hadn't told her what happened. I guess she didn't really need to know. She knew in time I would tell her. She stayed with me all night. I must have finally fallen asleep on the couch next to her. Next thing I knew, It was morning, and she was still there.

Mary Lou got up and strolled into the kitchen. "My mom is watching the kids for me." she started rummaging through my leftovers. "They know you need me, and I can stay for as long as you want me to. Besides, I could use a break from soccer practice and dance lessons. I was getting 'roids from having to talk to all the other parents."

I tried to smile. I am lucky to have her. She is my best friend. I can only hope that her life doesn't throw her road blocks like mine did. She deserved happiness, but I would be there for her,if it did. Just as she is for me. I think you only get one true friend. You can have many friends, but there is always one that will go the extra mile. Mary Lou was that person.

At two in the afternoon, we had the cake halfway finished. I was considering telling her what happened, but then it would be real. We were still in our jammies, watching Jerry Springer. I was sipping tea and trying not to cry. The lock tumbled on my front door. Ranger walked in. I didn't know if Mary Lou ever really met Ranger. As in "hello". Introduced, the whole enchilada. At that moment, I didn't really care if the Grim Reaper came through my door. I wasn't really there. Mary Lou looked flustered, and Ranger looked confused.

She turned to me. "Do you mind if I take off for a while? I need to check on things at home." I nodded and gave her a big hug, and said 'thank you'. She did an awkward hello and goodbye with Ranger, grabbed her purse and left.

Ranger looked down at me. I was still in my night-clothes. My hair ,all over the place. My eyes were swollen, my face all blotchy. I had curled up into ball on the couch trying to dissolve into the fabric. He closed the front door and leaned against the frame. "Are you sick? Anything contagious?"

I just nodded "No". I didn't think a broken heart was contagious, but I wasn't sure. He looked like he needed a clue. I didn't give him one. Ranger walked over and sat next to me on the couch, and flicked the T.V. off with the remote. He put his arm around me protectively.

I must have fallen asleep. I woke up with a start, not knowing where I was. I realized I was on my couch. It was close to eight at night, and I was alone. I knew what woke me up. Someone was coming through the door. Ranger. He walked in. He had Chinese food. He set the food on the table. He still didn't ask me what was wrong, and I didn't tell him. There was a lot of silence. For once, I really needed it. Some things are just too sad to say out loud.

"You should eat something, Stephanie" He finally said. Opening one of the containers of sticky rice and handing it to me.

I glared at him, but he wasn't swayed by my evil glance. He just stared right back. I stubbornly grabbed the container, picked up chopsticks and mashed stuff around a little, putting it back down. He stopped eating his food. I could see he was trying hard to get what was happening. To give him credit, this was not his problem. I think it was obvious at that point that it had to do with Joe.

"Are you going to tell me what this is about? He finally said, dropping his food container on the coffee table. "You were suppose to meet me at the office this morning. When you didn't show, I called. Your phone is off. I thought something happened to you. I was being a good guy, and so I called Morelli. He told me maybe I should come over and check up on you. It was out of character for him. So here I sit. I am still in the dark. You need to open up and let me know what is going on. I don't mind the silence, but it would be nice if you could trust me.

"Joe broke up with me." I said, finally. I took a deep breath. Finalizing it. Throwing it out there, making it the reality I was having a hard time facing. "He told me I was a walking disaster, and that I would never be the girl he wanted me to be. That it was unfair to ask it of me. What he needed was someone normal, someone to help get rid of the demons in his head, not make more."

Ranger almost looked relieved. Apparently breaking up with Joe was nothing new. "Stephanie, I can't believe I am saying this, but I am sure you will mend your relationship. You always do."

"It's different this time." I felt new tears fall. Damn.

Ranger moved over so he was next to me on the couch and tucked me into his jacket. It was warm and cozy. It felt safe. I must have dozed off. It was morning when I woke up. I was on the couch with a quilt over me. The boxes of food picked up. Rex had some veggies in his bowl, and Ranger was gone.

I pulled myself up, dragged myself into the bathroom, and took a really long hot shower. I tied my hair back, and attempted to get the circles to go away from under my eyes. My life needed to go on. As reckless and crazy as it was, I needed to live it. I was struggling with sadness. I took a deep breath and walked out the door. Unfortunately, when I got to the parking lot, there was no car. My piece of crap Honda was not around anymore. It was probably on its way to the big scrap pile in the sky by now. I stood there. Taking it all in.

Mr. Capelli came by, walking fast. He was rail thin. Probably weighed twenty pounds less than I did, and he was two inches shorter. He had a slight hunch, which didn't seem to slow him down one bit. What little hair he had was as white as snow, cut short and neat. He had to be about a hundred and five. He wore black rimmed thick glasses that made his eyes seem three times their normal size. Kind of like Mister MaGoo. I had seen him occasionally, walking around the parking lot. He picked up trash and looked for loose change. He was spit and vinegar in the morning. I don't know how he did it. Mrs. Sanders in 2B told me he was always up at five AM doing laps up and down the hallways. She was going to complain. She said it wasn't normal for a man his age to be acting that way. I hope I had that much energy when I got old.

"Hey there, sweetie!" he said. "Ya need a ride somewhere? I don't see your car today."

Actually,yeah. I did need a ride. "I don't suppose you could give me a ride to work?" I said. Hoping that he actually owned a car.

"Why sure! I was going out anyways. I need a different place to take my walks." He said. "I think maybe the park. I keep getting notes on my door from the woman next door. She says its illegal to walk up and down the hallway until after seven. I think she is full of baloney, but what can ya do? " He got into a dusty green Dodge Neon that was sitting in the corner of lot. He unlocked the passenger side for me, and I got in. Well. There ya go. I thought. I had myself a ride.

"I need my exercise." He continued. If I slow down, I will never get back up to speed. I'm waiting for that new senior living building to be finished. Have you seen it? It's a beaut! It's over on Charleston Street. Can't miss it. It has all the palm trees out front."

From what I remembered of Charleston Street, it was a quiet tree lined street with a small cemetery that dated back to the 1800's. It had a mortuary that Grandma Mazur was banned from entering because of her casket hi jinx, and a flower shop. There were a few older houses set back from the street. Putting a Senior housing complex in that neighborhood seemed like a good choice location. Make it convenient.

"I'm fifth in line to get a place in the new complex." He said as he drove. His seat was pushed up as far as humanly possible. His nose almost touched the steering wheel. He sat on a phone book so he could see over the dash. "I'm getting a nice bachelor pad. There are plenty of single chicks moving in. I saw the list. Lotsa women. Including your grandmother."

That got my attention. "My grandmother?" I stuttered.

He nodded. "She's pretty cute, too. I told her about the building. She said she was already on the waiting list with another hot young thing. They were thinking about being roomies. Of course, I thought that was a whopper of an idea. Two available girls. Like college all over again."

"Hot young thing?" I said confused. My Grandmother was no spring chicken. She was in her early 80's, I was almost sure of it.

"Shoot," He said. "Don't tell anyone, but I'm eighty-six years old!. Most of the girlies that will be moving in are all younger than I am, and most of them are single!"

Oh Boy.

He went on to say that I might know the woman Grandma was speaking of " Bella something". Oh Crap. My heart almost stopped. I coughed, and choked on my own surprise.

He hit my back hard with his palm, causing me to cough again . "You gotta watch out. My late wife choked on a pickle. Died right there in front of me. It was a doozy of a pickle too."

"Are you telling me that my Grandmother might move out of my parent's house to live with Grandma Bella?"

"Well, I don't know if she is a grandmother." He told me, happy as pie.

His car jerked to a stop and just about gave me whiplash with the seat belt. My head was two inches away from getting some dash. "Whelp..Here ya are!" He said as he parked the car half in, half on the curb in front of the bonds office. "Hope to see you again soon! Tell your Grandmother I am looking forward to living close to her. She's a real doll."

I said good-bye, and he drifted off, nearly missing three cars parked on the road with only inches to spare. Grandma Mazur moving out? I had a feeling I would be talking to my mother about this.

Connie was at her desk, swamped with folders. There was a huge mess in front of her. She had decided to use the new computer to hold all the data from the office, but with that came the task of data entry. What was left of the files from the fire were in front of her. She did not look happy.

"How's it going?" I asked tentatively.

"Don't even go there." she said in a huff. "All this crap about Vinnie leaving, and I am still working on last month's problems. I need an office assistant. This is getting ridicules."

"I thought Lula was helping you." I picked up some of the half burnt up files, shuffling through them. They were more than a little destroyed. I could only read one forth of the content.

"Yeah, right. All these files in this pile are toast." she said pointing to the ones I picked up. There is nothing I can do with them. Most of it was on the computer, but I have to go through and check them all one by one. It's a pain in the rear."

"Is he here?" I said looking towards the closed-door half hidden by a large cardboard cut out of Chewbacca.

"Vinnie?" She said laughing. "He never leaves. I think he's been sleeping on the couch in his office. One day he came out of that office in boxer shorts. It was scary."

"So, what is the deal with Scottsdale. Is he still thinking about moving?"

"He is doing more than thinking, Stephanie. Yesterday afternoon after everyone left, he went as far as having me draw up papers. He said he had to leave. He liked the idea of us buying out the business from him."

"Maybe I should go to Scottsdale with Vinnie." I said. As I said it, I was thinking it could work.

Connie froze. She looked up at me. Her eyes got as large as a bugs. "What?"

"Scottsdale." I said. "Maybe I should go with Vinnie."

"I saw your car last night on my way home. It didn't look so good. you okay?"

"Maybe it would be a good thing for me. It would be nice to not get blown up every time I turned around. Maybe my luck would change. Maybe I could keep a car. Maybe people would stop shooting at me, and maybe I wouldn't get in the fricken newspaper every fifteen minutes." I picked up a pillow and thunked my head with it. "What am I thinking?"

Connie shuffled some more papers and looked slightly irritated. "Considering that I went through with this deal because I thought you were going to be here to help me, I think it would be a terrible idea. Who would I have to do skip tracing? Lula?"

"Maybe you could hire someone else."

"From what I remember last time we did that, it was a disaster."

Connie had put an ad in the paper for a bond enforcement agent when we needed some help and Ranger was out of the game for a while. The people who did show up were not exactly qualified. I heard her huff a few times.

"So what happened? I heard you had some car problems."

I told her the short version of the story.

"Morelli needs to get a grip. He is hot, but he needs to live in this century."

"He has a point, Connie. I mean, how many other people do you know that blow up cars weekly, and burn up building as much as i do?"

"That's the thing." She said. "You didn't. Other people did that. It wasn't your fault."

I rolled my eyes. At some point, I think I needed to realize it could not be all coincidence.

I saw Vinnie's light go on in his office. I got up and went to talk to my cousin.

Vinnie wasn't into wasting time. If I was going with him, I had to be ready to leave in less than a month. He was taking the cowardly route. Running. From the looks of his two black eyes, I had an idea that it wasn't really his choice. It was more of a leave or die kind of situation. Connie signed paperwork stating that she would own half the business. He would be a silent partner, meaning he couldn't complain if things went south. She was a good business woman. She could pull this off. Although, she was not happy I was leaving. I knew she would probably make more money with Vincent out of the picture. Vinnie gambled a lot of the business away. Lula, in spite of how Vinnie felt about it, was getting a chance at being an apprehension agent. Vinnie almost blew a fuse when he heard that one. Especially since he only had 3 agents to begin with, and one of those was Ranger. He only came in for the big cases, so he really didn't count. Connie would have to find some agents to pick up the slack. I was having a hard time believing Lula could pick up anyone without some help.

Lula was looking at me sideways when I walked out of his office.

"I think Scottsdale might be nice." I said, trying to rationalize my intentions. "I watched the History Channel. It said Scottsdale was full of historic buildings and stuff."

"Hunuh. I don't think you realize where Scottsdale is? That's desert, girl. Rattlesnakes, spiders, scorpions kinda desert. I looked it up." She said. "It's hot in Scottsdale. Your hair will frizz, you'll get all dried up like a prune. You want to look like a prune?"

Being prune-like didn't sound all that fantastic.

Connie and Lula were taking all of this really well. Actually I think they were shell-shocked. They both made me promise that tonight, we were going out. It didn't matter what I said, I had no choice. They wanted to know what the heck was up. They wanted details. I needed a girl's night anyway. They were picking me up at eight.

I called my Dad; I needed a ride, and a car. I decided that an armored tank like the Buick might be what I needed to ward off the creeps that I kept getting. I was paranoid about being outside. What if the sniper rumor Ranger put in my head was true? I was not going to be anyone's target today.

My Father pulled up to the curb. His cab was doing the local rounds anyway, he said he was in the neighborhood. He had retired from the Post Office three years before. He bought an old cab, fixed it up and now he ran his buddies around in it for some extra money.

He asked me if I wouldn't mind stopping by the house and coming in for a few minutes. He said my mother was ironing again. She needed someone else to talk to besides Grandma Mazur. He said I needed to run some interference. I wanted to pick up the Buick,anyway. We pulled up to the curb. My father and I looked over at Mom and Grandma Mazur. Grandma has lived with us since Grandpa Mazur was doing the Polka with Jesus. They were both standing at the door watching us.

"I wonder if everyone's family was as crazy as ours?" He said.

I didn't have an answer for that one.

I opened the door and climbed out, thanking him for the ride. Grandma had a book of the occult in her hand. She glanced at me and tried to give me an evil stare. Today she was in all black. Black dress, black patent leather shoes, and a big cross around her neck. She could pass as a witch on Halloween.

"What? What did I do?" I said as Grandma continued to stare at me with weird piercing eyes.

"Wait." She said, putting her hand up to her temple. "I am getting a headache. I almost saw your future, Stephanie. I saw lawn furniture and Pez candies." She used her arms to do a dramatic sweep of the yard, staring far away.

My mother put her hands on her hips. "Oh for Heaven's sake, you're staring at lawn furniture, and at Mary Alice's Pez candy horse. I can't take anymore of this nonsense. Kill me now, Lord, take me away. I'm ready." She made the sign of the cross and walked into the house. "Stephanie. I need to talk to you in the kitchen." She said, as her voice drifted from inside the house.

My mother only asked to talk to me in the kitchen when there was a real dilemma. Which was about once a week.

When I walked in, she was hunting for a bottle, but I didn't think she had anything strong enough. "Your Grandmother has gotten it in her head that she's psychic. She has a new friend, God help us. You know her, Hell everyone knows her. It's Bella. Joe's Grandmother."

Eeek. I was afraid the rumors were true.

"People keep calling, saying that your grandmother is practicing witchcraft and that she and Bella are going to move in together, start a cult. This town is going down the tubes, I tell you. What I am going to tell everyone?" She took a glass down and poured herself some brandy. "You need to talk to Joe, find out what he knows about all this. I can't even get a moments peace with all this nonsense."

I knew my Mom was upset, but hearing Joe and I broke up was not going to help. I leaned on the kitchen counter, contemplating. "I don't know If I can call him." I picked up a piece of cheese and ate it. "We broke up."

My Mother glared at me. "Don't tell me that. I don't want to hear that now. Linda Santorin's Daughter's married, and has four kids. Elizabeth Croat's Daughter Beth is a Lawyer, She's married with a child on the way. And what, I have one daughter who is on her second marriage, this time to a Kloughn, and another who gets blown up and is never going to give me grandchildren." She tried to stop herself from saying that last part, but it slipped out. She put her hand up to her mouth, but it was too late.

I narrowed my eyes. There it was. She wanted me to get pregnant and have a child!

"You were secretly wishing Joe would knock me up! Then we would have to get married!"

"Well." My Mother said, taking another drink. "I can't say it wouldn't be a nice change. It would keep you from getting in the newspaper every week."

I couldn't believe her. She was being selfish. She wanted me to settle down and be, well, normal. Agh! My own family! I was normal-ish. I wasn't ready to have children and settle down to a life, like my sister.

"Listen," She said. "Be mad at me later about that. I have phone calls from half the neighborhood telling me you lost another car too. I am willing to let that go. Just fix your grandmother. She is going off the deep end!"

I thought it is safe to say she'd been teetering for a few years now. But I didn't.

I went outside took a deep breath, and called Joe.

"Yep" he said. Not much for conversation, I guess. I sighed.

"My mother wanted me to call you, and find out what is going on with Bella and Grandma Mazur."

There was silence.

"Hello?"

"Give me a minute." He hung up.

I was being rational here. But it really hurt my heart to hear his voice. I missed him, I missed Bob. I wondered if I got visitation.

I was hugging myself. Thinking about visitation, when he called back. "My Mother didn't know about this. Thanks for the heads up."

"Joe?" I said. "Do I get visitation?"

"With me, or Bob?"

"With Bob."

"How would that work, Stephanie? This is hard enough, please don't make it harder."

I sighed, and hung up. We had used Bob many times to fix our relationship. I guess this time; Bob wasn't allowed to work it out.

I declined dinner with my parents. I had promised Connie and Lula some time, and I needed to go home and get ready. Grandma was going to another viewing tonight. They had Florence Picador laid out, and it was going to be a full house. Bella and Grandma were going together. I really was glad I didn't have to drive them.