Darthemius: Where are my damn sunglasses?
Naruto: They're in your hand.
Darthemius (Looking at his hand): Oh… never mind. Still, what the hell did you want?
Naruto: Oh yeah, check this out. I checked our funds and found that we're spending way too much. So I thought how we can make some spare cash.
Darthemius: And? What did you come up with?
Naruto (Grinning): Check this out! I'm gonna do a videogame developing!
Darthemius (Opening a cola can): Oh yeah?
Naruto: Sure! I even already have some projects! Look at this: "Darthemius versus Predator!"
Darthemius (Spitting his cola): Pffffft! What?
Naruto: Oh yeah, that… I kind of remembered the time when I was making money by killing heroes. Now's your turn. That's only fair.
Darthemius: I… I guess. So, what's the game about?
Naruto: Oh yeah, check it out. In a distant galaxy there is a planet where aliens and predators fight constantly. And one day a human ship crashes on this planet! Out of the entire crew only one person survives. With no food, weapon and hope for survival!
Darthemius: And where's my part in this?
Naruto: What a dumb question, you're that lucky guy!
Darthemius: Hell no! I'm not doing this!
Naruto: Why not?
Darthemius: I don't have super powers, you moron! I'll die!
Naruto: Oh… Well, I've got other projects! Look at this: "Darth Effect!"
Darthemius: What?
Naruto: "The hero Darthemius is trying to save the galaxy from a race of almost invincible sentient machines!"
Darthemius: Nah, I'm not the hero type…
Naruto: No? Then how about "Age of Darthemius?"
Darthemius: No.
Naruto: "Darth Souls?"
Darthemius: Stop it, man…
Naruto: "Prince of Persia: Darthemius Within!"
Darthemius: Enough…
Naruto: "Darth Fantasy!"
Darthemius: Oh man…
Naruto: "BlazBlue: Darthemius Shift!"
Darthemius: Okay, I've had it…
Naruto: "Darth of war!"
Darthemius: STOP!
Naruto: What?
Darthemius: I appreciate the work, man. But I have another way of making money.
Naruto: Oh yeah? What way?
KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK.
Darthemius (With a smirk on his face): O'll open it. (Opening the door)
Princess Kitana (hugging Darthemius): Darthy! Sorry I'm late, the portal was shit.
Darthemius: Don't worry about it, babe.
Naruto (Pointing at Kitana): A…A…A…
Darthemius: Go take a shower, man… A cold one.
Naruto: Yeah, I'll do that…
Kitana: Nope, I'm first! It's hot outside so I'm all sweaty. Go get that strudel ready.
Darthemius (Smirking): Sure. (To Naruto) That's my way.
Naruto (Turning around and leaving): Damn, I need to change a job…
Darthemius: Finally I'm alone. Time to start the real ANs…
Okay, hello again, guys. I have to say that I was genuinely surprised last time. Why? No, not because I got so many reviews… thanks for that by the way. But what surprised me was what I SAW in those reviews! Almost all of them had something to say about what was quickly branded as my 'rant'. I mean shit, you guys are actually reading my damn notes! You know that means a lot… On a side note, almost everyone agreed with what I said. Of course some disagreed… two guys if I remember.
Also, who said that I hate kenichi618? Hatred is such a strong word, people! The only thing I did was pointing what I think is the biggest flaw in all of his stories. Hell, I remember his name! That's a major acknowledgement! Also I never said there are no decent stories. I simply read them all already. I was simply disappointed that there are no new good ideas.
Now on the story itself. Many of you were surprised where I went with it… Naturally, guys! That's my job, to surprise you and make things entertaining. I'll tell you that I received a huge amount of messages saying that Tsubaki should betray the village with Jin, or how he should fuck his mother and make her pregnant. Yeah, I've got to deal with a lot of idiotic ideas. But let me tell you this, I already know what's going to happen… I'm the author after all… And I tell you, I don't think you will be disappointed with what I'm planning. So please, please, don't make any conclusions at the end of this chapter. Everything I write is to make a story interesting and unpredictable. Well, at least I try.
Now finally, since you liked my rant so much last time, how about another one? No, not about Naruto… though there are many things I could say about that. No, this time I wanted to talk… say does anyone of you watch WWE? I mean shit, I was raised in the Attitude era! I'm proud to say that The Rock was, is and always will be my role model. Yes, not even my father, though I loved him very much. I stopped to watch WWE in 2003 due to me being in Russia and it wasn't translated here… And then I started again in 2008. And my first impression was… WHAT THE FUCK? Who in the blue hell are those guys? And where is the cursing! The beer drinking, names calling and ass kicking? No, instead there were new faces: Rey Mysterio, Jeff Hardy and… John Cena.
I mean really, guys? Let's take Mysterio and Hardy first. Tell me why are people cheering for guys like that? Mysterio, a shrimp who thinks he's tough shit. I saw him once beat Mark Henry… People, I'm twice as big as Mysterio is and I doubt I could beat Mark Henry… In a street fight with a steel pipe maybe… but not the way Mysterio did! And people cheer for that when it's too pathetic to even be called a fake. And then there is his finisher. You people probably don't know, but he used it as a simple irish whip rebound back in 90th. And then he jumps on people, and it's supposed to hurt. Shit, if my grandmother will fall on me it will hurt more!
And Hardy, who paint his face, polishes his nails and paint his hair… uh blue. Shit, I saw his matches and laughed for hours! Look at it, guys! He can't even throw a straight punch! And don't give me that crap about him jumping from high places. I once saw a guy who jumped from an nine store building's roof onto the concrete and stood up like nothing happened. Besides, I can't take seriously a man who looks like a fucking clown! Watch TNA! He actually paints another pair of eyes on his eyelids! Does he think that he will see better because of it?
And then there is Cena… You know, I'm not even going to comment on that. Everything I will say was already said by someone else.
And then I finally understood why people are cheering for those guys! Simple, people… it's really easy to be their fans. For example, put on a green t-shirt, a hat with 'U can't fuck me' sign, make a stupid face and I doubt anyone will even doubt you're John Cena. Paint your hair, face and ass! WHAM! You're Jeff Hardy! Put on a stupid mask and you're Rey Misterio! Shit, I sometimes see little kids in the crowd with their faces painted and masks on their faces. That's disgusting! Can't they see that they are setting an example?
Now try dressing up like The Rock. I assure you, you won't look like The Rock, because he dressed NORMALLY.
Also there is their new "Be A Star" crap. Shit, they're actually telling people not to be a bully… Fucking hypocrites! Stone Cold Steve Austin, one of the biggest icons of the business was the biggest bully in the history of said company! From my perspective that's a direct insult to him.
But their methods is what's actually takes the cake. Telling people that being bullied is bad, shouting BE A STAR and smiling in the camera. Cute, really… Are they idiots? Come on, take all pieces of trash from your neighborhood and start asking: "Were you bullied?"
"Yes."
"And you?"
"Yes."
"And you?"
"Yes?"
"Did you like it?"
"No."
"Then stop whining you damn bitches and do something about it!"
I'm telling you guys, shouting "Be a star" and "Please respect each other" won't cut it. And I'll tell you why. You see, in their promos they forget to ask another question: "Were you a bully?"
Well I can tell you that I was a bully my entire life and never regretted it. You know why? Because I'm big and strong. And also because I could. And if some moron walks to me and say "Please respect me" I really doubt I'll do just that. If you really want to stop being bullied there is only one solution, shove something sharp up your ass and do something about it. Start going to the gym, buy a gun, tell the bullies that you once raped a bull and it died in the process. Doesn't matter! Do something! Don't buy that hypocrisy, if you just sit around and do nothing, nothing will ever change.
And if any of you who read this were actually bullied, I want you to think about this. If you could change places with a bully, would you do the same? No, I say think! Because most of you will surely say "Of course not!" or "How could you ask this?" But please don't lie to yourself. Having power over others is good, almost intoxicating. I know that from personal experience. Can you really refuse it? If yes… than you are lost to this society. Why? Simple, it's build on principles like this. The strong prevails over the weak.
And that will never change…
...
Chapter nineteen: Not over yet.
"Shin-ne!" – talks.
'Nah' – thoughts.
...
With Konoha team…
"There they are." Jiraya stated. "Check them for life signs."
Several ANBU went forward to check on Rock Lee's and Sabaku no Gaara's laying bodies.
"He's alive." One ANBU member said about Lee. "However he is caught in a genjutsu… a pretty strong one at that. I won't be able to dispel it."
"I see… What about the other one?"
"Same here." Another ANBU member replied. "Only instead of genjutsu there is a strange seal on his forehead.
"A seal you say?" Jiraiya said in surprise and went closer to inspect. "Well, well… A demon restriction seal. It is not very common to find one of these lying around."
"Kisaragi's work no doubt." Kakashi stated. "I saw him use it on Gaara back during the finals of the chuunin exam."
"I wonder if he made it himself…" Jiraiya muttered.
"Jiraiya-sama! We have found another body!"
"Unconscious too?"
"Not this time. You'd better take a look."
"Hmm… Who is this?" Jiraiya asked, seeing Kimimaro's motionless body on the ground… with a happy smile on his face. "Is he one of ours?"
"No, look at his chest." Kakashi pointed.
"Ahh, a cursed seal. I didn't notice it with all that blood on him. What do you think, Kakashi?"
"About what?"
"About what could make him smile like that in his last moments?"
"Well…"
"Sorry to interrupt your philosophical discussion…" Yugao interrupted with a hint of anger in her voice. "But can we please move on? I'm not going to let Kisaragi get away!"
Jiraiya sighed at this. "Fine, let's move…"
Back with Naruto… (Starting song: Antares from Tekken 5 soundtrack)
"I-Itachi…" Sasuke whispered in deep shock. "Y-You're al-live…"
"Not for long!" Naruto stated. "I have been waiting for this, nii-san! At last my ambition will be realized!"
"Wait a second! You are the one who tried to kidnap me back then!" Tsubaki shouted.
Itachi spared her a quick glance and turned back to Naruto. "Let them go. This is between me and you."
"Let them go?" Naruto spoke in amusement. "Well, as for Tsubaki-chan, she is free to leave. Sasuke-kun on the other hand…" He grinned evilly, placing the tip of his blade on Sasuke's throat once again. "No fucking way! He's my guarantee that you will not escape like you did last time! If you do, then Sasuke will die very slowly and very painfully… swallowed alive by flames of Amaterasu!"
Itachi's eyes narrowed. "Release him and I will give you what you want… Uzumaki."
"Uz-Uzum-mak-ki?" Sasuke stuttered.
Naruto started to slowly turn his head… and when he did, glancing at Sasuke over his shoulder, younger Uchiha's heartbeat stopped.
Jin was looking at him with two Sharingan eyes.
"Hmhmhmhmhmhm… HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Naruto laughed hard. "Oh, that expression of yours is priceless!"
"Y-YOU!" Sasuke screamed in rage.
"Yes, me! Me, me, me! The man you so desperately wish to kill! Here I am in front of you and what do you know! You can do nothing!"
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Sasuke screamed even louder. "Let me go! I'll kill you!"
"Shut up!" Naruto replied, backhanding Sasuke across his face. "You are nothing but bait and should know your place!" He turned to Itachi with a glare. "As for you… do you have even the slightest idea of what I want?"
"My head obviously." Itachi stated.
"You imbecile!" Naruto yelled back. "Always was and always will be! I could care less about your head, your ass or your dick! You said you'll give me what I want… Well, I want Mikoto-san back! Give her back to me and I will release your useless brother!"
Itachi's eyebrows rose. He really wasn't expecting this.
"You cannot, huh?" Naruto's grin returned. "Well in that case dear Sasuke-kun will stay exactly where he is right now! You want him free? Then you'll have to kill me first!"
"Naruto?"
Both Naruto and Itachi turned to a wide eyed Tsubaki. "You really are Naruto?"
"Yes… Yes, I am Naruto."
"Did you… Did you really kill the Uchiha clan?"
Naruto's grin widened at this…
"No! Don't do this, Uzumaki!" Itachi shouted in fear. "Don't tell them anything!"
"Oh? And I think it's a great idea!" Naruto stated. "Time to bring the whole truth about that act into the open!"
'If Sasuke learns…' Itachi gritted his teeth. 'No, I have to think of something fast… Damn, let's hope this works.'
"You know it was necessary, Naruto."
The blonde's smile fell immediately. "What…? What did you just say?" He whispered.
'Yosh, it worked. I have to bring up his full rage…' Itachi concluded. "You know that a civil war could break down. It was necessary to not let that happen, so it had to be done!"
Naruto's eyes shifted from normal Sharingan to Mangekyo. "Necessary? NECESSARY? You think I cared for your pathetic clan? You are an even bigger moron than I thought! I hoped they would disappear! I wanted them gone! If they all died, I would've been the only one by Mikoto-san's side! But no! That piece of trash was spared instead of her!" He backhanded Sasuke across his face again.
'Mikoto? Wasn't it the name of Sasuke's mother?' Tsubaki wondered.
"And now…" Naruto spoke as rage was starting to consume his mind. "Too much time has passed. And Mikoto-san is lonely… she can't wait to meet one of us, and today she will!" He took a battle stance. "They say that payback is a bitch… But your payback will come in a face of a MONSTER! A monster you created yourself! And once I'm done with you, I'm going to send your precious brother right after, so you can be a whole happy fucking family again! Time to die, NII-SAN!"
Itachi's eyes widened when in a quick burst of speed Naruto appeared right in front of him.
'He's fast!'
CLANG.
Itachi managed to block Naruto's blade with a blade of his own. But suddenly…
"Fuck!" Naruto grunted, somersaulting backwards.
"Already realized it I see…" Itachi spoke.
Naruto glared at the blade. "Sword of Totsuka…"
"Indeed." Itachi nodded. "One of the legendary blades. I'm not surprised you recognized it so quickly since you have one yourself."
"Tch." Naruto stood up straight again. "Do you really think it can save you? Even the king of hell won't save you from me!"
"Think again, Naruto." Itachi said. "One strike and you're done for! We can still stop this if you'll listen…"
"Never! It's better this way than living with constant pain in my chest!" Naruto shouted, rushing forward and clashing swords with Itachi again. "But even if I'm going to die, first I will make sure that you're going down right after!"
Konohagakure no sato. Hospital…
"How may I help… Oh, good day, Hokage-sama! What can I do…?"
"Get me Tsunade, now!" Minato shouted, scaring off everyone who saw him.
"H-Hai, right away!"
"Tch." Minato gritted his teeth. 'Is it truly possible that my dark past came back to haunt me…?'
"Minato?" Tsunade asked in confusion. "What do you think you're doing, barging your way in here and calling me all of sudden. I was in the middle of an operation just now…"
"Screw that!" Yondaime replied in anger. "We need to talk, alone."
"But…"
"Now!"
Tsunade sighed. "Fine, fine. Come with me…"
Tsunade's office…
"So? What is so important that you came here yourself and…"
"Do you have a sample of Jin Kisaragi's blood?" Minato interrupted.
Tsunade raised an eyebrow. "What, Kisaragi?"
"Do not make me repeat myself!" The Hokage snapped. "Kisaragi's blood. Do you have it?"
"Hai, hai…" The medic waved her hand. "Why would you need it though?"
"I need you to perform a quick DNA test."
"DNA test? With whom?"
Minato extended his left hand. "With me."
Tsunade's eyebrows shot up. "You can't be serious…"
He just glared at her.
"You are. Damn, what makes you think that…?"
"Just do the damn test, Tsunade!"
"Tch." The medic took an empty syringe and collected a sample of Minato's blood. "There's better be a good damn reason for this…" She said, examining the blood with a microscope.
"There is." Yondaime stated.
Tsunade rolled her eyes and switched Minato's blood with Naruto's. "Yeah, right. What could possibly…" Her face suddenly lost all its color. "Oh… my… fucking… god…"
Minato closed his eyes in shame. "Just as I have feared…"
Tsunade finally managed to tear her gaze off the microscope and looked at Minato. "I suggest you start explaining, and I suggest you start it now."
Yondaime took a deep breath. "It all started fourteen years ago, when Kyuubi attacked…"
Valley of the end…
"Guah!" Itachi gasped as he was sent flying backwards after receiving a crushing kick to the ribs from Naruto. Yet he could strike from every situation, so…
"Katon: Goukakyu no jutsu!"
"Hah!" Naruto laughed, drawing his sword. "Touga Hyoujin!"
Itachi's eyes widened when a huge wave of ice sliced his fireball in two and continued to advance towards him.
"Damn it!" He cursed, but just before ice hit him, Itachi's body turned into a pack of crows and disappeared.
"Hmhmhm…" Naruto chuckled, turning around slowly to see a winded Itachi. "You're loosing it, nii-san! I was expecting more out of you. After all, I trained to kill you for the best part of my life and this is everything you're capable of?"
Itachi gritted his teeth. Indeed, he was loosing against a kid. Why? Well maybe because Naruto had his Mangekyo activated the entire time? Of course Itachi didn't have such luxury. Still…
'Looks like I won't be able to put even a single scratch on him if it continues this way.' The Uchiha genius slowly stood up, closed his eyes and then opened them sharply.
"Oh?" Naruto smiled evilly. "Looks like you're finally starting to get serious. Good, I was already thinking about cutting off your brother's limb to make you serious. I'm glad I can save that for later."
Itachi's eyes narrowed. "I will not let you harm him."
"You'll have to kill me first!" Naruto snapped. "For as long as I live, your brother's life is forfeit!"
Itachi glared. 'Looks like he's beyond reason. I must force him to withdraw!' With that thought he rushed straight at his opponent and engaged him in a kenjutsu fight once again. This time though they were surprisingly evenly matched.
Somewhere on the sideline, almost completely covered in ice, Sasuke was watching the battle with a quickly beating heart.
'Brother… He's alive! And he's fighting to save me!' He thought. 'I have to get out of here and help him! This is Naruto, I must kill him! I have to break this ice somehow!'
Suddenly…
"Psst, Sasuke."
Younger Uchiha glanced over his shoulder. "Tsubaki?"
"Yes, it's me." The girl replied. "I'll try to get you out of here, but you must promise that you will help me defeat Jin."
"I will!" Sasuke responded instantly.
"Defeat, but not kill." Tsubaki corrected.
Sasuke's eyes widened. "But Tsubaki, he's…!"
"Naruto, I know." The girl interrupted. "And still, I want to talk to him again. Promise that you won't kill him once he's down and I will release you."
"Tch, fine." Sasuke hissed. "Now come on, we must help my brother!"
"Hai." Tsubaki took out a kunai, but then…
"Look out!"
Hokage's daughter turned her head just in time to see…
CLANG.
…Two swords colliding right in front of her face.
But what took her breath away was the fact that Jin's sword was stopped inches away from her neck.
"J-Jin…?"
"I told you to leave." Naruto stated with a scowl on his face. "I said that I don't want to kill you and that's true… However I will do that if you'll interfere with my plans once again!" With that he kicked Itachi away from him and swung his sword at Tsubaki once again.
However she recovered just in time to disappear in a flash of red just before the blade struck her.
"I see… so that's how it is." Naruto exclaimed calmly, watching how Tsubaki reappeared beside Itachi.
"You're forcing my hand, Jin." Tsubaki stated with her kunai ready to strike. "You are not the person I knew… you are not the person I loved."
Naruto simply tilted his head to the side.
"So now…" Tsubaki continued. "Now you left me with no choice but…" Next words died in her throat. Why? Because Naruto took out a kunai as well.
"Silly girl." He spoke. "Let me show you the futility of your attempts!"
"Stay on your guard, Tsubaki-san." Itachi said seriously. "Things are about to get much tougher…"
"But that's my father's…!"
"Kage Kunai no jutsu!"
"Jump!" Itachi exclaimed, doing the same.
Naruto smirked. "Useless in your case, nii-san!" He shouted and disappeared in a flash of yellow.
"Shit!" Itachi cursed, doing emergency kawarimi with a rock.
SLASH.
"Aw…" Naruto said in disappointment after cutting said rock in two. "I hoped that would be you, nii-san."
"Tch." Itachi hissed, disposing of his Akatsuki cloak immediately.
"Hmhmhm… Clever." Naruto stated. "But useless. I planted these pretty little kunais all over the area."
"H-How?" Tsubaki asked in shock. "That's not possible! Only my father's blood relatives can do this jutsu!"
"Hahahahaha!" Naruto laughed. "Why don't you ask this question to your dear parents, Tsubaki-chan?"
"Damn, I need your help, Tsubaki-san!" Itachi called.
"H-Hai! What must I do?" The girl asked.
"I'll provide the distraction. Once I say 'now' you must go and free Sasuke." Itachi said, making Naruto's eyes widen. "After you do that, take him and run straight to Konoha. I'm sure he won't follow you there."
"Understood, but… what about you, Itachi-san?"
The older Uchiha shook his head. "No, I must stay. This thing must be settled, but it's between Naruto and me. I don't want the two of you to get harmed in the crossfire."
"Tsk, tsk, tsk… How noble of you, nii-san!" Naruto mocked. "There's only one slight problem with your plan. She won't be able to help you!"
Itachi's eyes widened. "NO!"
It all happened in an instant. One red flash, two yellow flashes and…
SLASH.
"TSUBAKI!"
Konohagakure no sato. Hospital…
"So let me get this straight. Jin Kisaragi is actually your son Naruto…" Tsunade said.
Minato nodded.
"…Who you cast aside because your wife was afraid for her daughter…"
Minato nodded again.
"…And now he is back…"
And another nod.
"And now he's after your head."
"No." This time Minato shook his head. "If he really is Naruto, then he is not after me."
"Then who?"
Yondaime sighed. "Have you heard of the Uchiha massacre?"
Valley of the end…
"TSUBAKI!" Sasuke's desperate scream echoed through the valley. "NO!"
Tsubaki herself stood with wide eyes, looking straight at Naruto's stoic face. Slowly she turned her sights down only for her jaw to fall in shock.
Yukianesa's blade was sticking out of her stomach.
"Jin… Why…?"
Naruto stroke her chin with his left hand. "I told you not to interfere again. Know that I hate myself for doing this…" He said softly… and then removed his blade mercilessly.
"NO!" Sasuke screamed again.
"Hahahahahahaha!" Naruto laughed. "No one's gonna interrupt us again, nii-san! Now we can finally kill each other in peace!"
"You really have fallen, Naruto." Itachi stated.
"Fallen? Uh-uh! You threw me down! This is all your fault!"
Suddenly…
"NARUTO!"
Both Naruto and Itachi turned to Sasuke… just in time to see him breaking out, using two huge hands that were sticking out of his back.
"What the fuck?" The blond asked in confusion. "Ah, that's probably his cursed seal's second form…"
"I WILL KILL YOU!" Sasuke screamed again. "CHIDORI!"
"Sasuke, no!" Itachi tried to warn, but Sasuke was beyond any reason.
"DIIIIIIIIIIE!" Sasuke rammed his left hand through Naruto's chest… only for the blonde's body to crumble into ice. "SHIT!"
"Nice said." Naruto stated from behind and before Sasuke could turn around he kicked him hard in the back, sending the youngest Uchiha flying into the mountain's side. "They were starting to annoy me anyway…" He started to turn back to Itachi… "Now it's time to finish…" And his eyes widened. "NO!"
"AMATERASU!"
"!" Naruto screamed in pain as he was completely engulfed in black flames.
"Gah." Itachi fell on one knee, panting heavily. "Damn, that really took its toll on me. But at least now…" Next words died in his throat. Why? Well…
"GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Naruto continued to scream as red chakra was slowly covering his body.
"No, this is not possible…" Itachi muttered in shock.
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Naruto growled in concentration. His jinchuriki cloak now completely separated black flames from his flesh. "HA!" And with one final push he dispersed the chakra away from him, removing flames from himself entirely.
"H-How?"
"Aha… Ahahahahahahaha! Did you really think that it would be enough?" Naruto exclaimed arrogantly. "Didn't I tell you this before? I was learning how to beat you and you alone! I studied your abilities; I studied your strengths and weaknesses! I know everything about you!" Red chakra started to cover him again and soon four tails were swaying recklessly behind him. "There is nothing you can do to stop me! Time to die, NII-SAN!"
Itachi could only stare in awe and fascination how kyuubified Naruto created a black ball of concentrated chakra and swallowed it.
'Incredible… He was able to tame Kyuubi's power! Even Madara couldn't do that, not completely…'
"SHIN-NE!" Naruto sent a beam of highly concentrated energy straight at his enemy.
3…
2…
1…
BLAST!
A huge explosion shook the valley's foundation itself. Both statues of Senju Hashirama and Uchiha Madara collapsed and crumbled into small rocks.
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I killed him! I finally killed him!"
"Not yet."
Naruto stopped to laugh and looked into the dust cloud. "Ah, of course. I should've known…"
There stood Itachi, not destroyed by a long shot. Oh no, he stood calmly inside some chakra made creature with a sword and a shield.
"This is my ultimate weapon, Susannoo. Right now I am…"
"I know exactly what this is!" Naruto interrupted. "In fact, this is the moment I was waiting for! Now I can finally go all out!"
Next moment Susannoo formed around Naruto as well. The difference was that unlike Itachi's red, Naruto's demon was black. He had two horns on his head and a katana in his right hand. However there was no shield. Instead there was some kind of armguard around his left hand.
Itachi frowned at this. "You are strong, Naruto…"
"No, I am not strong." The jinchuriki replied. "If I was, then you'd be dead… and Mikoto-san would've been still alive."
Itachi paused. "…I did not kill my mother, Naruto."
"Spare me your pathetic lies, Itachi. You are going to die here regardless, don't try to buy yourself some more time to spare."
"I was not intending to." The Uchiha spoke. "I promised to give you a fight to the death and I am. But tell me, what will you do when I'm dead?"
"A fine question… I guess there is at least one more person who I wish to see before I die."
"I see… Then let us not delay this any longer."
Naruto smirked. "I couldn't agree with you more!"
Konohagakure no sato. Hospital…
"…So for the first time in my life I got scared. Scared for my secret to be revealed. So I let them accuse Naruto of killing off the Uchiha clan." Minato finished his story.
Tsunade sighed. "You know, you are a fucking idiot, Minato. All this is because of one fuck up you made in the past? Are you that weak?"
"You have no idea what you're saying!" Minato snapped at her, standing up sharply. "All citizens… Children, youngsters, adult… Shinobi of every class and skill… They are all looking up to me! I am a hero to everyone! What would they say if they learn that their hero threw away his own son?"
The legendary medic shrugged. "The same thing I just said, that you are a fucking idiot."
Minato said nothing at this.
"So? What are you going to do now?"
"I sent a team, a good one. They will bring him back… and then I will do things right."
"Oh? And what does Kushina think about this?"
"Tch." Yondaime scowled. "She doesn't need to know for now. I'll tell her when it's time. I need to bring him back first…"
Valley of the end…
CLANG.
"Damn it!" Naruto cursed when his blade got parried by Itachi's shield once again. They were battling in their Susannoo forms for twenty minutes already. The fight was too intense and both fighters were showing signs of exhaustion.
"Cough… cough!" The Uchiha suddenly fell on his knees in a coughing fit. "Damn it, not now!"
"Ahahahaha…" Naruto laughed. "Looks like you're tiring, nii-san! Low on chakra? Or maybe health problems?"
Itachi wiped blood from his mouth. "I still have more than enough to win this battle. Besides, you are tired as well, Naruto. You may have infinite chakra because of Kyuubi, but you are still a human like me and your muscles tire like mine."
"Grrrr…" Naruto growled. "Nonsense! I can still fight for many hours! My body…" However he stopped his rant when he tried to take a step forward and fell on one knee. "Wh-What?"
"Hmhmhm… Looks like you overestimated yourself… otouto."
"Gh!" Naruto grunted in anger. Kyuubi's chakra was leaving him quickly due to the lack of control. Rage was clouding his judgement. "Get up…" He smacked his own leg. "I said get up, bitch!"
"You made a mistake, little brother…"
Naruto slowly looked up to see Itachi standing in front of him with his Susannoo sword raised.
"…You should've fought me in a few years. But you were always too reckless and defiant. That will be your downfall." Itachi stated with superior expression.
"ITACHI!"
"Farwell, otouto."
Naruto's eyes widened in shock and anger when he saw Itachi's blade descend.
'NO! I won't accept defeat!' He thought as anger started to consume his mind. 'I will win even if it means to spend all chakra I have!'
Itachi's eyebrow rose when Naruto suddenly placed his sword in front of himself, one hand on the hilt and another on the blade. What he didn't notice was that Naruto's Susannoo did the same.
Big mistake…
"Kokuujin Ougi: Akumetsu!"
"Wha…?" Itachi looked up sharply just in time to see how his blade struck some energy shield in front of Naruto's demon.
"It's over." Naruto did a slashing motion with his blade and his Susannoo mimicked it, striking Itachi's demon head on. And despite the strike hitting the shield again…
SLASH.
A clear visible cut suddenly appeared across Itachi's Susannoo's entire form, but it was not over.
SLASH. SLASH. SLASH.
Again and again more cuts appeared across Itachi's demon until finally… PUFF.
…It disappeared in a puff of smoke, leaving his summoner defenseless.
"Im… Cough… Impossible…" Itachi muttered in awe. 'He defeated Mangekyo's absolute defense…'
"I'm not done!" Naruto's voice shouted from behind and Itachi turned around, preparing his sword once more.
"Where are you, Naruto?" Itachi called. The smoke from his Susannoo vanishing was still in place, so his vision was very limited. "Show yourself!"
"As you wish!"
Suddenly a yellow energy blade flew right at him. Of course his instincts kicked in and he blocked it.
CLANG.
Itachi slowly walked to the fallen and deactivated blade, looking down on it. "The sword of Raijin? Where did he…?" But before he could finish that sentence a yellow flash appeared in front of him and…
SLASH.
Itachi slowly looked down… only to see himself in the situation Tsubaki was not too long ago.
"Gah!" He spat some blood. "I… cough… I see. You placed your Hiraishin seal on this hilt. I couldn't notice it in the smoke. Clever…"
Said jinchuriki only grabbed the sword of Raijin from the ground, activated it and stabbed in Uchiha's chest.
"Ah!"
"So, how does it feel?" Naruto asked. "How does it feel to know that you're about to die?"
Itachi closed his eyes. "I feel… calm. I accepted my fate long ago…"
"Then take it!" Naruto sreamed in anger, tearing the sword of Raijin from Itachi's chest, and then…
"Frozen Requiem!"
Itachi looked down once again and saw how his body started to turn into ice.
"Well done, brother. You have killed me… But don't let your hatred consume you… or you will lose everything… again…" Were Uchiha Itachi's final words before his body turned to ice completely… and crumbled to dust.
Also to Naruto's surprise, the sword of Totsuka that Itachi was still holding in his hand froze and crumbled as well.
Silence reigned for a couple of minutes as Naruto just stood there motionlessly, slowly realizing what he just did. Then finally he fell on his knees.
"Huff… Huff… Aha… Ahaha… Ahahahahahaha! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!" He laughed madly despite his exhaustion and chakra depletion. "I did it! I finally did it, Mikoto-san! I killed him, he's dead! I did it, me! Nii-san is dead and now…" He took a deep breath. "And now it's all over…"
The blond slowly crawled to the river and looked down into the water.
"I haven't seen you in such a long time… It hurts me so much, I… I can't wait any longer." Naruto started to slowly unsheathe Yukianesa. "I'm coming, Mikoto-san… I will be by your side soon…"
But even before he was able to remove the sword from its scabbard a massive chakra burst happened.
"What the…?" Naruto turned his head and his eyes widened.
There stood a very angry Tsubaki… feral look on her face… and red chakra swaying around her.
"Ts-Tsubaki…?"
She looked at him angrily and then…
"JIN!" Hokage's daughter rushed at her former lover and delivered a crushing punch to his face.
"Guah!" Naruto gasped as he was sent flying down the river. "Oh fuck…" He tried to stand up shakily, but Tsubaki was already there.
SMACK.
Her foot connected with his face and just like that the blond went right through the mountain.
"You bastard!" Tsubaki pulled him out by the throat and started to punch him in the face repeatedly. "I trusted you!"
SMACK.
"And you betrayed me!"
SMACK.
"You betrayed everything!"
SMACK.
"How could you?"
SMACK.
"How could… How could…" Tsubaki dropped Naruto's body and started to cry openly. "Why, Jin? Why? I would've done anything for you…"
But he just lay there motionlessly.
"J-Jin?" Tsubaki asked as fear started to crawl into her very soul.
But Naruto still gave no response.
"Oh no… What have I done! Please no…" She shook his body desperately and then started to give him a heart massage. "Don't you dare leave me! Breath! Come on!"
"Cough!" Naruto came back to life.
"Jin!" Tsubaki released her breath. "Thank god you're alive! I… I hought…"
"…Why?" He asked quietly.
"Why what?" Tsubaki asked back.
"Why didn't you let me die?"
Girl's eyes widened. "What? But…"
"I never wanted for this to happen." Naruto suddenly said.
"Jin?"
"I was not going to become close with anyone… I was so focused on my revenge…" He slowly opened his eyes and looked at her. "And then you came. I wanted to send you away… so many times… yet I couldn't do it… At first I thought it would be funny to have Hokage's daughter around even if just to annoy him. But then… I don't know how it happened, but… you became something more than a tool to use. And I even… Cough… When I was with you I started to think that there might be a place in this world for me…"
"There is a place for you, Jin!" Tsubaki shouted, grabbing his hand. "For both of us! Just come with me! I will persuade father not to punish you! We can do it!"
Naruto smiled sadly, closed his eyes and shook his head. "We can… I can… But I don't want to."
"W-Why?"
"My reason for living is gone… My reason for hatred is gone… Now there is nothing for me."
"You're wrong!" The girl yelled. "You still have me! What about me? With you gone, I… I don't know what I'll do…"
"You will." Naruto replied. "But if you truly care about me… even slightly, please do one last favor for me." He took out the sword of Raijin. "Take this blade and stab it in my heart. This should be enough to end my existence for good."
Tsubaki's eyes widened. "What? I cannot…"
"Do it!" Naruto exclaimed, shoving the sword's hilt in girl's hand. "I betrayed you! Make me pay!"
Tsubaki stood up and looked down at him angrily. "If you want to die so badly, then I will make you pay… by not killing you!"
Naruto's eyes widened at this.
"And I will return you to Konoha and you will live a long life along with me! That is your punishment!"
The blond looked up at her in amusement and then started to laugh.
"Hm… Hmhmhm… Hahahaha! Ouch, damn you really set up on this aren't you?"
Tsubaki smiled. "You better believe it."
"Well… And what's stopping me from killing myself when I'm good again?"
"I will. And I will always be near to see that you won't do anything stupid again!"
"Hahaha! Well, that will be a tough job and…" Naruto's eyes widened. "Look out!" He quickly got up and pushed Tsubaki out of the way just before…
"Katon: Goukakyu no jutsu!"
…A huge fireball hit him in the chest.
"AAAAH!" Naruto screamed as he fell in water and started to drift to the second waterfall, which was going underground.
"NO!" Tsubaki tried to reach him, but his hand was a mere inch too far. "JIN!" She now could only scream as he fell into darkness.
"Son of a bitch!" Sasuke shouted, having every intention of jumping down as well. "I won't rest until I see your dead body!"
But just before he could jump a hand grabbed his shoulder.
"Not so fast, Sasuke-kun."
The Uchiha looked over his shoulder. "Orochimaru."
"This waterfall is high enough that even a jounin can die if he falls." Snake sannin explained. "You will die for sure."
"Are you saying that he is dead?" Sasuke asked with a mix of hope and fear in his voice.
"Absolutely not." Orochimaru stated. "That bastard will survive for sure."
"Then we must go down there and finish the job!" Sasuke screamed. "He must pay!"
"The detour will take too long. That bastard will be long gone by then." The snake sannin explained. "Besides we are risking to come across Konoha's team. We wouldn't want that, would we?"
"I don't care! He must die!"
Orochimaru sighed. "Now look here, Sasuke-kun…"
"Orochimaru." Tsubaki said dangerously. "This is all your doing… This is all your fault!"
"Indeed!" The sannin confessed. "Everything happened just as I have planned. Even better, that traitor did most of my job for me. Looks like even a rattlesnake can be tricked."
"You bastard!" Tsubaki activated the sword of Raijin and tried to lash out at Orochimaru, but suddenly got stopped by… Sasuke. "What are you doing, Sasuke?"
A memory quickly flashed in front of Sasuke's eyes… A memory of him regaining consciousness… just in time to see Itachi's body crumbling into ice.
"I've made up my mind, Tsubaki. I'm going with Orochimaru."
Said sannin licked his lips. "Excellent."
"You're going, huh? So you are going to betray me too?"
Sasuke gritted his teeth. "If that's what it takes to kill him then yes, but… I will offer something that he didn't." He extended his hand. "Come with me, Tsubaki."
She glared at him. "No, I am not a traitor."
"And I thought you promised to face my foe with me."
Tsubaki glared back. "And I will, if you come with me. However, if you go with that man… then next time we might very well meet as enemies.
Sasuke lowered his hand with a frown.
"Go if you must." Tsubaki continued. "But I will find Jin and we will return to Konoha."
"Hmhmhm…" Orochimaru chuckled. "Foolish girl. You actually believed what he just said? Don't be stupid, I know Rattlesnake far longer than you do. Believe me, that was just a pile of bullshit."
Girl's eyes narrowed. "You can say whatever you wish, I have faith in him."
"Idiot. Let's go, Sasuke-kun." Orochimaru said, placing a hand on Sasuke's shoulder again. "I sense Konoha's team nearby. We must leave now."
Sasuke took a quick glance at Tsubaki again. "I'm sorry…" And with that he and Orochimaru disappeared in a puff of smoke, leaving Tsubaki all alone in the valley.
"I…" The girl fell on her knees.
"Tsubaki!"
Hokage's daughter turned her head just in time to see Kakashi, Jiraya, Gai and Yugao landing in front of her.
"Thank God you're alright!" Kakashi stated. "Where is Sasuke?"
"Screw the Uchiha!" Yugao shouted. "Where is Kisaragi? I'll kill him!"
"Quick!" Tsubaki exclaimed. "It's Jin! He fell down there, we must help him!"
"What about Sasuke?" Jiraya asked.
"He…" Tsubaki paused. "He left."
"I see…" The sannin stood silently for a moment. "Very well, let's go after Kisaragi."
"Hai!"
Orochimaru's hideout…
"Sasuke-kun, you are my chosen one." Orochimaru hissed.
"I don't care about any of that." The Uchiha replied dangerously. "Just hurry up and give me power."
"Oi!" Some girl who was walking beside Sasuke finally spoke. "Be more respectful to Orochimaru-sama!"
Sasuke threw a glance at her. "Shut up."
"What?" The girl went for a punch, but…
"Stand down, Guren." Orochimaru commanded. "You don't want to hurt our new guest in his first day, don't you?"
Guren clenched her fists, but dropped her stance still. "As you wish, Orochimaru-sama."
"Hmhmhm…" The snake sannin chuckled darkly. "Welcome to your new life, Sasuke-kun."
?...
"Zzzzzzzzzz…"
"Oi…"
"Zzzzzzzzzz…"
"Hey, you."
"Zzzzzzzzzz…"
"Get up, you lazy asshole!" Tayuya shouted, smacking Naruto on the head.
"Yeow!" The blond jerked awake. "What the fuck was that for?"
"For sleeping when I'm talking to you, shithead!" The red head stated… and her demander changed drastically. "Are you alright? You were hurt pretty badly."
"Really?" Naruto raised an eyebrow. "Any permanent damage?"
Tayuya rolled her eyes. "Nothing's ever permanent with you." She stated. "You had a couple of broken ribs when you fell, but they healed before I even had the chance to bandage them, so you're good to go."
"Nice!" Naruto stretched his limbs. "Everything went just as I have planned."
"Hahaha…" Tayuya laughed. "You know, for some moments I really thought you were going to commit a suicide."
Naruto snorted. "Are you kidding me? Life is too wonderful to give it up just like that, besides… I can't throw away the life Mikoto-san gave me…"
Tayuya slapped her face. "Here we go again! Mikoto-san this, Mikoto-san that! When will you…"
She suddenly stopped when Naruto put his hand under her chin.
"Don't forget yourself, Tayuya." He whispered. "You can do anything, you can call me whatever you want… but if you ever disrespect Mikoto-san, then I will fucking kill you."
"Tch." The girl removed her head from his hold. "Alright, whatever. Oh and by the way, I have found this letter in your pocket. I suggest you read it."
Naruto took a piece of paper from her and his eyebrows shot up.
"Congratulations, otouto."
"Itachi!" Naruto spat in anger and already went to tear the letter apart when…
"Don't!" Tayuya grabbed his hand. "You can do this anytime. I suggest you read it first."
Naruto slapped her hand away. "I don't wish to hear what that bastard has to say!"
"Very stupid." The flute user said. "You will find the contents… most intriguing."
Naruto's eyes narrowed. 'Hmm… I guess I won't lose anything from reading it.' He thought, returning to the letter.
"If you are reading this, then I'm dead and you have defeated me. You have become strong, very strong. Stronger than I was at your age… stronger than I am now.
Which is why I believe you must know the entire truth…"
"What fucking truth?" Naruto exclaimed out loud.
"…The truth about that day. I have probably told you that I did not kill my parents before you killed me… And I was telling the truth…"
"WHAT?"
"What's wrong?" Tayuya asked worriedly, but Naruto ignored her and continued to read.
"You are not stupid, Naruto. You should realize that no matter how strong I am, no matter how advanced my Sharingan was, I couldn't destroy an entire shinobi clan. The truth is I was not alone that night. I had an ally… An ally by the name of Uchiha Madara…"
"Uchiha… Madara…" Naruto muttered.
"He was the founder of the Uchiha clan and the first ever to gain the Eternal Mangekyo Sharingan…"
Naruto's eyes widened even further. 'He has the same eyes as me!'
"Yes, he has your eyes… And that is actually the reason why I could never defeat him. Indeed, despite his weakened state, he is still too strong for me to destroy… You on the other hand… Yes, if you killed me, then I believe you will be able to do this. Madara is the true leader of Akatsuki. He will try to collect all biju and seal them into a giant statue. You must prevent it, for if he succeeds, that will be the end of the world as we know it.
Now you know everything, otouto. Finish it, avenge our mother…
Your brother. Itachi."
Naruto slowly closed his eyes and crumbled the letter in his hand.
'Was he telling the truth? Why would he lie if he knew he's gonna die?' He thought. 'So I can finish his job for him? Maybe… But what if he was telling the truth? Itachi…'
A memory suddenly flashed in front of Naruto's eyes. A memory of that day…
"Indeed I did…"
'That expression… when he said it. I never knew what it was… I never knew because I never seen such expression from him before. Now I know what it was…'
"It was necessary…"
'The same that I got that moment…'
"Know that I hate myself for doing this…"
Naruto opened his eyes sharply. 'Uchiha Madara… Well, since I'm on a crossroad, and since I don't really have better things to do, I guess I'll kill him just to be sure, so…' He grinned evilly.
"Oh, I know that grin." Tayuya stated. "What's on your mind?"
"Hmhmhm…" The blond chuckled. "Say… Have you ever wanted to wear a cloak?"
Same place ten minutes later…
"He was here…" Jiraya stated, looking around the cave.
"But where is he now?" Kakashi asked.
The sannin shrugged. "No idea."
"He should be nearby! We must find him!" Tsubaki exclaimed. "He promised…!"
"I wouldn't believe his word if I were you, Tsubaki-chan…" Kakashi said sadly.
"W-Why?"
"Jin Kisaragi has committed a high treason." Gai stated, closing his eyes. "He killed one of our jounins… and also severely wounded one of your team members – Akimichi Choji. He was almost dead when we found him."
Tsubaki's eyes widened. "N-No! He couldn't…!"
"Yet he did." Jiraiya stated. "He would've probably been executed if he returned. He knew that, so it is naturally he has escaped."
"It can't be..." Tsubaki stated absently as her world started to break. "They are both gone… I couldn't stop both of them…"
"Perhaps it is for the best that we didn't find him." Gai concluded.
"Indeed…" The sannin muttered. "There is nothing else we can do. Let's take Tsubaki-chan back to Konoha."
"NO!" Yugao screamed. "Where is Kisaragi! I want…"
"You are a ninja, Yugao. Act like it." Kakashi said dangerously. "Yes, your loved one was killed, but there is nothing you can do at the moment. Now you must follow orders, or you will turn into a traitor like Kisaragi."
"Gh!" The woman gritted her teeth. "Understood."
"Alright, let's move out." Jiraiya stated. "This mission is a failure…"
Konohagakure no sato. Hospital…
"Where is she?"
"Please, Hokage-sama! She needs rest and…"
"She is my daughter!" Minato shouted. "Out of my way!" He pushed nurse out of his way and entered the room. "Tsubaki!"
Red haired girl slowly turned her head at him. "Father…"
Minato rushed forward and hugged her tightly. "Thank god you're safe! I'm sorry I wasn't there, they should've never sent you after that Uchiha moron and…"
"Father." Tsubaki interrupted.
"Yes?"
"Am I… your only child?"
Minato's heart skipped a beat. "You…" He took a deep breath. "You are not."
Tsubaki closed her eyes. "Naruto?"
"…Yes."
"Why…" The girl looked at him again. "Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you tell anyone?"
Yondaime paused. "Your mother… She was afraid for your safety. So she…"
"My safety?" Tsubaki snapped. "What could he possibly do to me?"
Minato sighed. "No, you don't understand. It's not him we were scared of."
"What?"
"At first it was the fear of Kyuubi." He began. "The ritual we used to seal it was supposed to split not only his chakra, but his personality as well. Shortly afterwards however, I consulted with Jiraya-sensei and we both concluded that it can't happen. Of course I was overjoyed and actually wanted to take Naruto back, until…"
"What happened?"
"People of this village…" Minato sighed. "Too many of them have lost their loved ones in Kyuubi's attack. I thought they would understand… but after seeing how they treat Naruto I hesitated."
"So you?"
"So we decided to save at least one of our children." Minato confessed. "While in reality…"
"It was sealed in both of us."
"…Yes."
"Who knew of it?"
"Jiraiya-sensei, Kushina and myself." The Hokage stated.
"Sandaime-sama?"
"No, he did not."
"I see… What happened with the Uchiha clan?"
Minato closed his eyes. "The council has framed Naruto for it. He disappeared after the massacre and there was nothing I could do to defend him."
"How so?"
Minato shook his head. "The village is not buildings… not the council and not the Hokage. The village is its people… and people believed that Naruto was to blame. Only a select few knew the truth, and among this select few the majority hated him."
"Jin…" Tsubaki whispered, clutching sword of Raijin's hilt in her hands.
"So… what are you going to do?" Minato asked. "I just want you to know that I will support any decision you make."
Tsubaki nodded slowly. "Thank you, father. I know what I must do, but I'm not strong enough for that… yet."
Minato smiled at his daughter. "I believe I have a solution for this problem." He said, snapping his fingers.
BOOM.
Tsubaki looked out the window. "Jiraiya-sama!"
"Yo, kiddo! How are you doing?" The toad hermit exclaimed, smiling beamingly.
"What are you doing here, Jiraiya-sama?"
"Didn't you tell her yet?"
Minato smiled. "I was just about to."
"What are you talking about?" Tsubaki asked in confusion.
"We're talking about your apprenticeship under my guidance!" Jiraiya stated proudly. "For the next three years we are going on a training trip! And when you return, you will be more than ready to kick both Uchiha's and Kisaragi's asses!"
"I see… But why three years?"
"Orochimaru." The sannin answered. "Have you heard of Orochimaru's immortality technique?"
Tsubaki's eyes narrowed as she remembered her talk with Kimimaro.
"Yes, I know of it."
"Well I have the information that he used it just recently. Which means he has to wait three more years before he can use it again."
Tsubaki nodded again. "When are we leaving?"
Jiraiya smirked. "As soon as you're healed, so get ready!"
"Hai!" Tsubaki replied enthusiastically. 'Wait for me, Sasuke… Naruto…'
?...
"It looks like Orochimaru has gained the Sharingan."
"Seems that way."
"Is it Itachi's little brother?"
"Yes."
"Hey, what about Itachi himself?"
"He was killed."
"What?"
"That is true; I saw it with my own eyes."
"Don't bullshit me Zetsu! Who could possibly kill him, hn?"
"Calm down, Deidara. It was Jin Kisaragi."
"Kisaragi… He has become quite a nuisance. I believe he must be eliminated before we start the next phase of our plan."
"Wait." Zetsu said. "I have uncovered some very interesting information about Jin Kisaragi… Apparently his real name is Uzumaki Naruto."
"Naruto? As in nine tails jinchuriki Naruto?"
"Yes."
"That is… That is fortunate! Now we don't have to capture Yondaime's daughter. All we need is…"
BOOM.
"HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA! Found ya!"
"And who might you be?"
"Me?" A figure walked out from the smoke. "Well, people call me Jin Kisaragi, but I see that you already heard my real name."
"Hmhmhm…" Unknown voice chuckled. "How fortunate indeed. Not only have we learned about his status, he himself comes to us…"
"Oh? Deciding on how to capture me already?" Naruto asked. "How about I give you a better option?"
"Hmm… Well, let's hear it."
"Excellent!" Naruto exclaimed happily. "You see guys; I noticed that after I killed Itachi and Kisame you are two members short. So I thought what the hell, if I killed them, then I'm better than both of them, so…" He snapped his fingers and Tayuya appeared by his side. "Why won't you let me and Tayuya here to join your ranks instead of them? Besides, we even have our rings, see?"
Naruto and Tayuya showed their hands with Orochimaru and Itachi's rings on them.
"What about Kisame's ring?"
Naruto simply took it out of his pocket and threw on the ground.
Silence.
"And what guarantee do I have that you won't betray me?" Same unknown voice spoke after a while.
Naruto shrugged. "Simple, I have no reason to."
"Then why kill Itachi and Kisame?"
"With Itachi it was personal and Kisame… Well, he just got in my way at the wrong place at the wrong time."
"I see… Very well, I agree to accept you in our ranks, Uzumaki Naruto… But I know nothing about the girl."
"Hn. First of all Naruto died a long time ago. The name is Jin Kisaragi." Naruto smirked. "As for Tayuya… All you need to know is that she's strong, I trust her and we work really good as a team. You need the result, right? What does it matter which way it was achieved."
"Hmm… Hm. Very well, you have convinced me enough. Welcome to Akatsuki."
Naruto grinned. "Nice to have business with you."
...
Omake: Darthemius's mother has arrived…
...
Princess Kitana: Thanks, Darthy! That was wonderful! (Giving Darthemius a pack of money) Can't wait for our next time!
Darthemius (Smirking): You're welcome, babe. By the way, I'm throwing a party tonight. Will Shao Kahn make it?
Kitana (With wide eyes): You… You don't remember?
Darthemius: Don't remember what?
Kitana: Don't remember that last time we gathered, you ended up having a heated discussion with Shao Kahn about something… Of course you were both drunk as shit. Yet everything was nice until you picked up that frying pan and started hitting him on the head, shouting something like "Bears are better than Tarkattans". It took all of Shang Tsung's magic to piece his head back together, so he said he'll never go into this realm again.
Darthemius: Oh… Well, at least you have more freedom this way. Say, I certainly don't mind you coming over here, but tell me, how could a hot girl like you… especially dressed like this, not find anyone yet?
Kitana (Sighing): Well, there was that one guy… Hell, I even offered him to rule Edenia alongside me. And he refused…
Darthemius: Say what? He refused ruling the world with you?
Kitana: Kind of…
Darthemius: Tell me who it is, and I'll break his fucking neck!
Kitana: Too late for that…
Darthemius: Damn…
Kitana: By the way, my… sister asked if she could use your… services too.
Darthemius: By sister you mean Mileena? Hell no!
Kitana: Oh, come on. She said she will pay double.
Darthemius: …I'll think about it.
Kitana: Sure, you do that. Good bye.
Darthemius: Bye…
Naruto (Appearing from the shower): Are you done?
Darthemius: Yep.
Naruto: Fucking finally. It's one hour till the party. Guys will start coming right about…
KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK.
Naruto: Now. Could you open it, I'm not dressed yet.
Darthemius: Sure thing. (Opening the door) Hello… AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!
?: Hello, dear!
Naruto: WHAT? What happened? (Noticing a woman in the door frame) Shit man, isn't she too old for you?
Darthemius: Ahaha… Umm… It is so good to see you… (Glancing at Naruto over his shoulder) …mother.
Naruto (With wide eyes): MOTHER?
Darthemius's mother: Yes, I am his mother. Will you let me in, or should we talk right here?
Darthemius: Oh… Oh yeah, of course, come in. (turning to Naruto and mouthing 'Hide guns')
Naruto: Got it. (Disappearing in a room)
Darthemius: So umm… Why didn't you warn me that you're coming, mom?
Darthemius's mother: You always tell me that you have some problems and it is not the best time to come. So this time I decided to visit without a warning.
Darthemius: Oh…
Mother: So tell me, dear. Did you make it to Hollywood?
Darthemius (Raising both eyebrows): Uhh… Y-Yeah, of course! I was even hosting a TV show…
Mother: Really? I'm so proud of you! And who was that handsome boy just now?
Naruto (Appearing from the room with a cola can in his hand): Everything is taken care of, pal!
Darthemius: Mom, meet my roommate… umm… Daniel Radcliffe.
Naruto (Choking on his cola): What?
Darthemius pointed at his mother.
Naruto: Oh… yes, nice to meet you, ma'am!
Mother: Wait, you mean you played Harry Potter?
Naruto: Y-Yeah, of course!
Mother (Tilting her head to the side): I never thought you were so… big.
Naruto: Umm… Well, Harry Potter series are over, so I decided to change my image. You know a guy can get stuck in people's mind as one single character…
Mother: Too true. Oh, can I use the restroom, sweetie?
Darthemius: O-Of course, mom!
Naruto (After the toilet door closed): What fucking Daniel Radcliffe?
Darthemius: Chill, man. Mom thinks I went to Hollywood to be an actor…
Naruto: But why Radcliffe? Take a damn good look at me, we're nothing alike!
Darthemius (Shrugging): That was the first name that popped up in my head.
Naruto: Whatever…
Tifa Lockhart (entering through the still opened entrance door): Darthy! (Wrapping hands around Darthemius's neck) I was so looking forward to seeing you again!
Darthemius: Oh shit…
Naruto: You don't say…
Darthemius: Umm… why are you so early, Tifa?
Tifa: Are you kidding? I came here first so I can claim you for the night of course. I'll even pay extra if you make me shatter a glass by screaming your name again.
Darthemius: Double shit…
Naruto: You don't say…
Mother: Oh, I never knew you had a girlfriend, sweetie.
Darthemius: Oh, it's nothing like that, we're just acting! I… mom, meet Monica Belucci!
Tifa: Who?
Darthemius (Through gritted teeth): You are very happy to meet my mother, right Monica?
Tifa: Uh… Oh yes, of course! Nice to meet you, ma'am.
Mother (Skeptically): You're much younger than I thought.
Tifa: I uh… I did a plastic surgery.
Mother (To the side): I guess modern medicine can do wonders… (To Tifa) So tell me, dear. What can you tell me about my son? He never tells anything to his mother…
Tifa: Oh, he's great! All girls just love to… play with him. Sometimes we even fight so we can end up in the same… movie as him.
Mother: I knew you had it in you, dear!
Darthemius (Rolling his eyes): Thanks, mom…
Albert Wesker (Walking through still open door with a vodka box in his hands): Hey, guys. There's still plenty in my car, mind giving me a hand?
Darthemius (Hastily): Mom, meet… umm… Leonardo Dicaprio!
Wesker (Letting the box fall from his hands): The hell?
Mother: Oh, Leonardo! You were so great in Titanic!
Wesker: Uhh… sure. Darth, a word please.
Darthemius: Sure, we'll be right back…
Kitchen…
Wesker: The fuck was that?
Darthemius: That was my mother.
Wesker: Oh… Still why Dicaprio?
Darthemius (Shrugging): Sorry, he was the first one who came in mind when I thought about blonde actors.
Wesker: Damn, couldn't I be Bruce Willis?
Darthemius: Are you high, man? He's bald!
Wesker: True… What about Jackie Chan?
Darthemius: Duh, you're not Chinese.
Wesker: Hmm… Then why not Chuck Norris?
Darthemius (With wide eyes): ARE YOU INSANE?
Wesker (Taking a step back): W-What?
Darthemius: No way, man! I know you're cool and all, but there is no way… AND DARTHEMIUS MEANS NO WAY you are cool enough to be Chuck Norris!
Wesker: Fine, let it be Dicaprio. But on one condition, I'm having the best looking girl tonight.
Darthemius: Deal! Let's get back…
Living room…
Mother: Welcome back, dear. More of your friends have come by the way.
Darthemius (Noticing Alucard with a very irritated look on his face): Oh…
Wesker (Approaching Alucard): And you are?
Alucard (Rolling his eyes): Tom Cruise…
Wesker (Smirking): Leonardo Dicaprio. Nice to meet you, hahaha…
Alucard: Fuck you…
Trish (Appearing in a flash of lightning): Have no fear, blonde hottie's here! Oh, hi guys!
Mother: Wow, that's a nice trick…
Darthemius (In panic): Mom, meet… Britney Spears!
Trish (With mouth agape): Wha…? Are you blind, what fucking mmmf…!"
Naruto (Covering Trish's mouth): She's just tired. Come, sweetie. You require a nice hot shower. (Dragging struggling Trish away)
Darthemius (Rubbing his temples): Sorry, guys, but I guess the party's off. My mother will require a Stunner… I mean a spare room.
Tifa: Awww…
Darthemius: Don't worry, I'll think of something for tomorrow. Al… um Leo, can you call the others?
Wesker (Rolling his eyes): Sure, buddy. Have a nice family reunion.
Darthemius (Quietly): Fuck you…
Mother: You said something, dear?
Darthemius: No, of course not, mom. I'm just so… happy that you came. Come on, I will show you my apartment…
...
And that's it for today.
Fuck like hell and sleep well!
Darthemius.