Clint hadn't been able to go back to his apartment since the Avengers had seen Thor and his brother back to Asgard. It didn't take a genius (even though Tony obviously was) to figure out why. If he went back to his apartment, he'd be alone. And he wasn't quite ready for that just yet. No one there to snap him out of a nightmare, make sure he was really his own man and not a Loki meat puppet. So he gave Clint and Natasha adjoining suites on the same floor of his tower and said nothing further. Tony knew about nightmares. And he would do everything he could to help his friends through it.
.0.o.0.o.0.
Natasha woke on the couch to the sound of Clint's bare feet pacing back and forth across the hardwood floors. She sighed.
"You're never going to get cleared for duty if you don't get some sleep."
Her partner hadn't done more than catnap (and the irony of that term being applied to Hawkeye was not lost on her) for three days. His psych eval was in two. He needed to level out or he'd never get his field clearance back.
His laugh wasn't the same laugh she knew. This one was cold, hard. A mask.
"I can't close my eyes without seeing their faces. All the agents I-"
"Stop." Something that sounded eerily like a sob choked his throat. "None of those deaths were your fault, Clint. None."
"Why not? It was my arrows in their bodies."
"Because when push came to shove, you didn't take the kill shot." His snort was still too high pitched to be considered normal, but it was getting better. "You shot Fury in the vest instead of taking a headshot, you flat out missed Hill-"
"I… I shot Fury? Hill?" He froze. The look on his face was one of confusion.
"Clint…" Natasha spoke slowly, like she was afraid to startle him. "Do you remember anything while you were… compromised?"
"I… no. No, not really. All I really remember until you hit me is this wall of blue coming down, separating me from my body. And… him, telling me 'You have heart'."
Natasha sat up straighter. "But you told me things when you woke up-"
"Bits and pieces, here and there. Nothing really solid, except…"
Realization dawned. "Except when you dream."
A pained noise escaped her partner, but at last he sat down.
"I go to sleep, and all I can see is him."
Natasha pulled herself up next to him and leaned her head down on his shoulder. When he cringed away from her touch, she wanted to weep.
Separate assignments hadn't helped. She still had feelings for her partner, feelings that had been forbidden to her until Clint freed her, had given her a choice. And when Coulson had called and told her he'd been compromised…
It cemented it.
She was in love with this broken, beautiful man.
Tasha took his hand in hers, rubbing light fingers over his archery calluses.
"Loki-" he shuddered, then leaned his cheek on her head. She went on firmly. "You can't be afraid of his name, or he'll always hold power over you. Loki took you apart like a puzzle. I'm here to piece you back together again."
In a lesser man, his sigh would have been called a sob.
"You think you can sleep if I stay here with you?" She felt him nod against her head. "Okay then."
She led them over to his bed and leaned them back against the pillows piled high at the head. She started humming a half remembered Russian lullaby as she ran her thumb over his hand.
Slowly, the tension that held his shoulders rigid over the last three days eased. Clint's breathing evened, and eventually his death grip on her hand eased. But he didn't let go.
Natasha wouldn't have let him anyways. Gingerly, she shifted until she could wrap her free arm around him and held him close, breathing in his smell of leather and sweat and cordite.
He'd helped her through her own nightmares once. It was time to wipe that red from her ledger.
.0.o.0.o.0.
A/N: For more on Clint's nightmares (and Natasha's, and Tony's, and well, all of the other Avengers!) take a look at my Nightmare series. Feels and angst abound!
Thanks to Kalo Suva, twilight maid, AgentEquus, and Shazrolane for their awesome reviews!