Title: Conjuring Pain

Author: Ailendolin

Rating: T (PG-13) … just to be sure.

Disclaimer: I do not own Cats and do not make any money with this story. I only own the little plot bunny.

Summary: Everyone thinks to be able to conjure would be great, but Quaxo cannot confirm that. To him magic only means pain, loss and loneliness. It started ruining his life since he was a kitten. Will his broken spirit be mended when Tugger and Munk stumble upon him?

Word Count: 2445

Warning: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, but mainly Fluff – a lot of it.

Author's Notes: Hi, everyone! I hope you all had a lovely Christmas with your family. This chapter was supposed to be ready on Christmas as a kind of present but, well, you can see how that turned out. As an apology this chapter is a little longer than the previous ones and I hope you enjoy it. I've also realized that I've been promising you to introduce the new kittens since chapter 10. Sadly, you also won't meet them in this chapter, but they'll be there in chapter 15. =) So, have fun with chapter 14 which is a kind of rollercoaster ride and tells us some new things about Plato. Thanks again to everyone who reads and favourites, but most importantly reviews this story.

Chapter 14: You're Special

The kittens were anything but happy when Jelly came by early that afternoon to pick them up. Jemima tried to hide behind Munkustrap while Tumble and Pouncival shrank into the shadows of the tabby's den, hoping not to be seen. Quaxo cocked his head in confusion.

"What are you doing?" he asked into the shadows.

"Hiding!" squeaked Pouncival. "Shhhhh! Or she'll see us!"

Quaxo shook his head, still not understanding, and looked to Munkustrap for an answer. "Why would they be hiding from Jelly?"

The tabby smiled warmly. "They don't want to leave, Quaxo. They love playing with you."

"Yes," Jelly confirmed, nuzzling first Quaxo and then Munkustrap briefly in greeting, "but that doesn't change the fact that it's time to go home now."

Jemima was the first to leave her hiding spot. With her shoulders hanging she looked at Jelly dejectedly. "Do we really have to go home so soon, Mummy? We had so much fun!"

"I know you had, sweetie. And you will have fun again, maybe already tomorrow." She turned her head towards the shadows. "Come out now, you two."

Grumbling, Pouncival and Tumble stepped out of the shadows. "Why do we have to leave so early, again?" Pouncival asked.

Before Jelly could reply, Munkustrap stepped forward. "Because we will get three new tribe members today."

Pouncival looked decidedly unimpressed. "So? What has that got to do with us?"

"Manners, Pouncival," Jelly hissed at him. His ears flattened and he muttered, "Sorry."

Munkustrap smiled, clearly amused. He crouched low so he could look the kittens in the eyes. "It has everything to do with you. The new members are kittens, just like you. Well, maybe a little older. And I'm required to be present when they first come into the junkyard."

"Kittens?" Jemima asked, eyes wide with hope. "Little queens like me?"

Munkustrap shrugged. "Maybe. We don't know."

Tumble tugged softly on the tabby's fur. "I still don't get why we can't play anymore. We're not even allowed to come and meet the new kittens anyway, are we?"

"You're right, you're not," Jelly confirmed. Then she explained, "We don't want to overwhelm the little ones after their long journey. Just a few cats will be present and Munkustrap as the future leader of our tribe is one of them."

"So," Munkustrap continued, "someone will have to watch Quaxo for me and Plato volunteered. It's his first time looking after a kitten and will be quite an experience for him. I think watching all four of you might be a little too much, don't you agree?"

Grudgingly, Tumble nodded. "I guess."

Munkustrap and Jelly shared a look and smiled. "Don't look so sad. You will see each other again tomorrow and maybe you'll even get to meet the new kittens then," the tabby promised.

"And," Jelly added, looking at Jemima and Pouncival, "Tumble will come home with us so you three can continue playing until Jenny picks him up."

That seemed to lift the spirits somewhat. The three kittens said goodbye to Quaxo, and Tumble gave him his yellow wool ball back. "See you tomorrow, Quaxo. Have fun with Plato!"

"Thanks," Quaxo said quietly.

Before they left, however, Jelly turned once more towards the black-and-white kitten. "How are your paws, Quaxo? Do they still hurt?"

Quaxo shook his head. "No. But the b-bandages itch."

Jelly smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry, they'll come off tomorrow. I'll talk to Jenny about it."

"Thank you," Munkustrap said while Quaxo nodded, idly picking at a bandage. They watched Jelly and the other kittens leave, waving at them until they rounded the corner. Then they were alone.

"You hungry or thirsty?" Munkustrap asked his charge and turned to go to their den. When he realized that Quaxo was not following him he turned back around. "Quaxo? Is everything alright?" He nudged the kitten gently but Quaxo only shrugged. "What's wrong, little one? You're not hurt, are you?"

Quaxo shook his head and stared dismally at his paws. Munkustrap frowned. He knew that Quaxo was not what one would call a normal kitten, given his family history, and that he was more quiet and withdrawn than other kittens his age. But this drastic mood change was something new and entirely different. Just a few minutes ago Quaxo had been running around laughing and now he looked like his world was about to end.

"Won't you tell me what's wrong?" Munkustrap asked softly.

Quietly, the kitten said, "I don't think they'll want to play with me anymore." Quaxo's dark eyes looked up at him, and they were filled with so many emotions and brimming with tears that Munkustrap's heart immediately went out to him. He drew the kitten into his arms, allowing Quaxo to bury his head deep into the grey-striped fur on his chest. It did not take long for the tears to fall.

"Why would you think something like that?" Munkustrap whispered. "Tumble loves you, and Pouncival and Jemima adore you as well. They're already looking forward to seeing you again tomorrow. They even said so themselves."

"B-but," Quaxo began, voice muffled by the fur, "once the new kittens are here they'll realise how boring I really am. I can't even k-keep up with them, Munkus!" A shudder went through the small black-and-white body and Munkustrap held the distraught kitten tighter.

"They don't care that you're not as fast as they are yet, Quaxo," Munkustrap said quietly. "They know you're hurt and they automatically adjust they're playing so you can keep up with them."

Quaxo simply gripped the tabby's fur tighter as he sobbed harder. "But with the new kittens around they won't have to adjust anymore! They'll play with them and forget all about me."

"Oh, Quaxo." Munkustrap was at a loss of words. He already regretted having to leave the kitten to greet the three newcomers. It would not surprise him if Quaxo thought he would leave him as well, replacing him with someone else.

Someone cleared their throat behind them and Munkustrap looked over his shoulder to see Plato standing a couple of feet away, looking unsure. "Sorry, should I come back later? At a better time?"

Munkustrap sighed and shook his head. "No, stay." He turned back to the shaking kitten in his arms and gently tried to pry him from his fur. "Quaxo, Plato is here. He's been really looking forward to play with you today."

Quaxo sniffed and shook his head dejectedly without looking at Plato. "I'm sure he'd much rather greet the new kittens with you."

"That's not true, Quaxo," Plato said, suddenly appearing beside them. He looked at the kitten with warm and caring brown eyes. "You're special, don't you know that?"

Quaxo finally looked up at that. He sniffed. "I am?"

"Oh yes!" Plato said enthusiastically. "Every cat has a unique story. That's what makes them special. Just because you're different doesn't mean no one loves you or wants to play with you." When Quaxo looked like he wanted to argue Plato added, "I met your friends on their way home, you know? And all I heard them talking about was you! How clever you were, how much fun they had and how they were already looking forward to playing with you again tomorrow. No word about the new kittens whatsoever. They genuinely like you, Quaxo. Just like Munkustrap does. Like Tugger, Jenny, and Jelly do. And I like you as well."

Quaxo gazed at Plato for a moment, then he looked down at the yellow wool in his paws. Shyly, he offered the ball to Plato. "Here."

"Thank you, Quaxo," Plato said amiably. "Want to play with me?"

With a nod, Quaxo waited for Plato to throw the ball and then jumped up to catch it. And just like that the tears and self-doubt were forgotten. He brought the wool back to Plato who threw it again, a little farther this time. Munkustrap looked at the young brown tom gratefully. "Thank you, Plato. You handled that better than I ever could."

Plato shrugged and smiled self-deprecatingly. "Ah, well. Sometimes, all one needs is a little pep talk. I just – I can relate to how he feels, you know? Thinking you've done something wrong, that you're not good enough."

"What happened to your parents was not your fault. You do know that, don't you?"

Plato sighed. "My head knows, I guess. My heart is a different matter. And Admetus ..."

"Loves you dearly," Munkustrap finished for him. "Never doubt that, Plato."

The young tom smiled. "I don't. Not really, anyway. Sometimes, I just wish things had been different, you know? Especially for him."

Munkustrap nodded just as Quaxo came back with the yellow ball of wool in his mouth. The kitten laid it down at Plato's feet and looked up at him expectantly. Plato picked it up, winked at Munkustrap and threw the ball at the tabby. Munkustrap lazily kicked it through the opening to his den.

"Wow!" Quaxo exclaimed before he bounded after the ball.

Plato chuckled. "So, did you learn that move from Tugger or was it the other way round?"

"What do you think?" Munkustrap asked with a grin.

Plato grinned back. "I think it's time you left for the main clearing or the new kittens will be there before you."

"Alright, keep your thoughts to yourself then," Munkustrap said with a laugh. "But you're right, I should go. You sure you'll be okay with Quaxo on your own?"

Plato gave him a look. "If anything should happen I know where I can find you. We'll be fine."

"Okay." When Quaxo came running out of the den with the wool ball Munkustrap called him. The kitten was slightly out of breath when he stopped in front of them. "I'll have to go now," Munkustrap began tentatively. "Plato will stay with you until I come back. Is that alright?"

Quaxo glanced briefly at Plato and then nodded, smiling widely. "Of course!" He hesitated a moment before he stepped closer to Munkustrap. "You promise you will come back?"

"I promise," Munkustrap solemnly said.

"Even if one of the new kittens is cuter than me?"

Now Munkustrap laughed and hugged his kitten tightly. "Even then, little one. No one could possibly replace you. We're family after all, right?"

"Yes." Quaxo smiled happily at him. They let go and both Plato and Quaxo waved Munkustrap goodbye.

"Want to continue playing with the wool?" Plato asked once Munkustrap had rounded the corner and was no longer in sight.

Quaxo shook his head, still out of breath. "Can we just lie in the sun for a while?"

Plato smiled. "Sure. You tired?"

"A little bit. Running around on bandaged paws is difficult." He wrinkled his nose at the bandages.

"Well," Plato said, stretching out on the sun-warmed ground with a smile on his face, "your paws are healing, right? So you'll be running around without bandages in no time, I'm sure. For now let's give your poor little feet some rest."

And they did just that, lying close together near the entrance of the den, a gentle breeze caressing their fur. It was a lovely afternoon and although Plato was of course curious about the new kittens he was more than happy to spend some time with Quaxo and show Munkustrap that he was trustworthy. There had been a time when he had been just as insecure about his friends and family as Quaxo was now, and he was glad that he could help the little tom with that. He knew that Quaxo was not to blame for his mother leaving him, but he also knew that the little kitten probably still believed that it was his fault and thus expected his new friends to leave him as well, sooner or later.

Plato had thought that way, too, not so long ago, after his parents had died. Only he, on the contrary to Quaxo, had not let anyone get close to him. Safe for his brother Admetus, that is. He still remembered how afraid he had been that Admetus was going to go away, just like their parents had. It had taken him weeks to learn that his brother would never leave him and that it was not his fault that their parents had died. It had taken him even longer to learn to trust the other cats in the tribe again and because of that he more often than not felt like an outsider, neither really fitting in with the kittens nor with the adults. It was hard, finding his place in the tribe again, and he wanted to spare Quaxo that pain if he could.

When he closed his eyes he could still hear the Pollicle growling and smell his foul breath. They were huddled in a dark corner of an alley, hoping the dog would not notice them. But the wind was not in their favour, and the dog sniffed the air and came closer. Out of fear, Plato had taken a step backwards, right into a shard of broken glass, and mewled. At once, the Pollicle had come running into the alley and their father had told Admetus to get Plato and run to the junkyard as fast as he could. The last thing Plato had seen of his parents was bloody fur and defying eyes until the dog had blocked his view. He would never forget his mother's screams.

Quaxo nudged him tentatively and Plato was brought out of his memory. He smiled at the black-and-white kitten next to him, and could not help but think that even though they had both lost their parents Quaxo had had it so much worse. At least Plato and Admetus had known that their parents loved them while Quaxo's mother simply had not wanted him around anymore.

"What is it, Quaxo?" Plato asked gently.

"You looked sad," Quaxo said, staring at him with his big eyes. "When Munkus comes back you can ask him to hug you. He gives the best hugs! They always make me feel better."

Plato laughed and ruffled the fur between Quaxo's ears. "I'll be sure to try that. Now, how about a story? Hm?"

Quaxo immediately sat up, an eager expression on his face. "Tugger told me about the Jellicle Ball! Do you have any stories about it?"

"Well," Plato pretended to think. "Has Tugger told you about the Great Rumpus Cat?" When Quaxo shook his head, Plato began his story with a grin. "Every year at the Jellicle Ball we perform a play for Old Deuteronomy. And sometimes, we tell the story of the Great Rumpus Cat who is a hero amongst cats everywhere ..."

TBC