Jane rang the doorbell once and waited impatiently for someone to answer. Please don't be Mr. Isles. Please don't be Mr. Isles. But it was a puffy-eyed, red-nosed Maura that answered the door instead. She's been crying. They made my Maura cry.

"What are you doing here?" Maura asked.

"I know you don't want to date me, but―"

"Why are you here?" Maura asked, sternly.

"Because I like you," Jane averted her eyes.

"You like me? I was crying at school because of you!" Maura yelled at her. "I don't know what's true and what isn't! All I did was go on a date with you! I don't deserve this! I don't deserve that horrible nickname! All I did was kiss a girl whom I thought was my girl!"

"I'm still your girl."

"No, you're theirs," Maura sobbed.

Maura wasn't the first girl to cry in front of Jane or because of Jane; one had cried after hooking up with her because she was ashamed of what she had just done and ashamed that she had enjoyed it so much, but Jane remained calm and comforted her. "It's just sex," Jane told her. "It doesn't mean you like girls." Jane honestly didn't know what it meant for her or whether or not that particular girl had any desire to hook up again with her or any other girls, but it was what she needed to hear and Jane was willing to tell her anything to make her feel good about herself. "I won't tell anyone about this," Jane promised her. And she didn't tell anyone or act any differently toward her despite the fact that the girl began flaunting her sexual attraction to guys whenever Jane was in her presence.

But everything was different with Maura. She didn't have the words to comfort her and, even if she did, she knew she wouldn't be able to speak them without crying, herself. "Can I hold you?"

Without speaking another word to her, Maura opened the door wider for Jane to enter her house. There was no gesture from Maura to have a seat next to her, so Jane decided to keep a safe distance and sit on the next cushion rather than wrapping her arms around Maura. She let me in her house. That's a start. I'll just leave the physical contact up to her.

"You have to leave at two o'clock," Maura said, coldly. "My mother will be home and she didn't give me permission to have company."

"Why isn't she here?" Jane asked. "Did she pick you up from school?"

"She did."

"Is she upset with me?"

"Regardless, you shouldn't be here when my parents aren't," Maura pointed out.

"But you let me in," Jane reminded her. "Can I please just hold you? We need to talk about what happened. After that, if you don't want to date me again, you don't have to. I just don't want this to end because of a misunderstanding. You're home, all of your clothes are here, yet you're still wearing my hoodie. That has to mean something."

Maura pulled the hooded sweatshirt over her head and tossed it to Jane. She was wearing nothing other than her bra underneath, but Jane was too focused on having the hoodie returned to her to notice Maura's lack of clothing. "Keep it. I don't understand why girls have fought for this."

She watched as Maura left the living room and headed upstairs. Was she going to get a shirt? Was she finished with their conversation? Jane wasn't going to wait to find out. She followed Maura upstairs to her bedroom and entered without asking. "I don't know why girls have fought over my letterman jacket or this sweatshirt," Jane said as she tossed it onto Maura's bedroom floor. "They care more about the sweatshirt than the girl in the sweatshirt. None of those hookups meant anything to me, Maura. It's only been a few days but I already care so much about you and I wouldn't be standing here if I didn't think you cared about me, too."

Jane expected Maura to yell at her again, to tell her to leave―anything other than what she was doing at that moment with her arms wrapped around her and her head resting on her shoulder. "I do care about you. That's why this hurts so much."

"Tell me what hurts," Jane said as she held Maura close. "Tell me and we can fix it together."

It was her first time in Maura's room―the bedroom she had seen only via Skype and Snapchat. There were pictures of female athletes on the walls and collages of Maura with her two best friends. The pictures were taken all throughout their four years of high school and Jane couldn't help wondering what their lives would have been like had they gotten to know each other then. She knew Maura wasn't allowed to date until recently, but she imagined them as friends secretly or not-so-secretly having crushes on each other. I could have done things right and made her my first and only girl. I could have waited.

It wasn't how she imagined her first time in Maura's room nor was it how she imagined her first time seeing Maura topless, but it felt right―the softness of Maura's skin beneath Jane's fingertips and her sudden need to hold tightly to Jane as if Jane and Jane alone could comfort her. "Will you lie down with me?"

"Anything," Jane promised. "Do you want to put a shirt on or a pajama shirt?"

"Am I making you uncomfortable?"

"No," Jane smiled. "Do you want me to―"

"I'm not ready."

"I wasn't even thinking about sex," Jane confessed. "Not that seeing you in your bra turns me off. You know it doesn't, but I actually wasn't focused on sex, I swear. I was just going to ask if I could cuddle you."

With Maura cuddled up to her, Jane felt as if she could forget the morning's events―the locker, the confrontation with Maura's friend, the talk with Brad. The talk with Brad. "I didn't mean to get you involved in all of this." She noticed Maura roll her eyes. "I didn't mean to, but it happened and now I don't know how to fix it. That's not helping you―I know it's not."

"It's not," Maura agreed. "Your friends told me you're going out with me because of a bet."

Maura's revelation was of no shock to Jane. She knew what the girls were capable of and why she expected them to spare Maura's feelings was beyond her. "Do you believe them?"

"No." Maura played with the hem of Jane's hoodie. "I know you wouldn't do that, but what bothered me is the possibility of going to school everyday and hearing that nickname when I'm walking down the hallway or in class. Not being your girl is easier than being tormented. You're theirs."

"I'm yours," Jane reminded her.

"Then prove it!" Maura demanded.

Jane bit her lip. "I posted that pic on Instagram for everyone to see. I gave you my jacket and hoodie to wear. What do you want me to do, Maura? I'll do anything."

"I'm not referring to social media or your jacket," Maura told her as she pulled away. "If I'm your girl, stick up for me! Defend me! You're Jane Rizzoli. The popular crowd revolves around you and Brad. I can't stop them from tormenting me, but you can."

"Can we still date?"

"Not until you fix this," Maura insisted. "As long as I'm being called Maura the Whore-A or any other derogatory name, I don't want to go on a date with you."

Maura the Whore-A. Maura the Whore-A. The sound of her supposed friends chanting that nickname replayed in Jane's head. She hadn't heard them say it to Maura, but she imagined what she must have felt like―the intimidation, the hurt, and the knowledge that those girls had the power to make the remainder of her high school experience a living hell.

"What even is this?" Jane asked, barely audible.

"What?"

"I'm the whore!" Jane blurted out.

"Neither of us are," Maura brought to her attention. "There's nothing wrong with enjoying sex."

"But we didn't do anything that night and you've never done anything. I'm the one whose been with so many girls. Why aren't they angry with me? Why are they taking it out on you?"

"You know why," Maura glared at her.

"I didn't mean for them to rip you apart," Jane attempted to apologize, but Maura was no longer looking at her. She got up from the bed to get a tank top from her closet. Until then, Jane hadn't focused on the fact that Maura was wearing only her bra and a pair of jeans. Little Jane is really behaving herself for once.

"Everything was okay before this," Maura began to say as she sifted through her closet. "I was lonely while my friends were on dates, but I used that time to do my homework. I was completely unknown at school. That used to bother me and now I wish I could go back to that. Being unknown is so much better than being ridiculed. I managed to avoid petty high school drama for almost four years and this happens six months before graduation. I'm trying to tell myself that none of this is going to matter after graduation, but six months is a long time to feel this way."

She wasn't sure if her actions were out of line and, in that moment, she didn't care. She wanted to feel Maura, to hold her and reassure her again. "Then don't feel that way," she said as Maura began to cry. "They're doing this to you because they know they can. They didn't become popular by caring about people and having a great personality. They became popular because they stepped on so many girls to get to the top and, because of that, other girls fear them. High school is all they have. Maybe it's all I have, too, but you're Maura Isles and you're always going to be Maura Isles. You're smart and caring and so beautiful and you're going to do so many great things after high school. You're going to go off to some prestigious university and these social hierarchies aren't going to matter and maybe we'll be together or maybe you'll fall madly in love with some other girl and forget all about me and, even if that happens, I'll still be so grateful for the time we've had together and the fact that I was once fortunate enough to kiss you and be yours."

"Jane?"

"Yeah?" She asked hopefully.

"Are you trying to make me feel sorry for you?"

"Is it working?"

"No," Maura shook her head.

"Then no," Jane smiled at her.

Maura rested her head on Jane's shoulders. "Will you sleep with me?"

Jane's eyes grew wide. "Maura, I―"

"It's nothing sexual," Maura insisted. "I'm exhausted and I don't want to sleep alone."

She was emotionally and mentally exhausted, but the possibility of oversleeping and getting caught by Maura's parents was too much for Jane, so she stayed awake while Maura slept peacefully in her arms. She tried to enjoy the feeling of holding Maura, but it wasn't long before her mind wandered from the thought of being Maura's girlfriend to what was written on Maura's locker. She wanted to go home and talk to her parents about what happened, but she knew her mom would tell her that's what she gets for hooking up with popular girls instead of just having a relationship with a nice girl from the beginning and her dad would tell her that all these girls are making her lose her concentration on what matters like sports and school. "Why are you friends with these girls?" her mom would ask, but if the girls who wrote on Maura's locker were who she assumed they were then they were never really her friends to begin with. The girls who sat at the same lunch table she did―the ones she hooked up with―weren't people she considered friends. She didn't call them or text them to ask about their day and they definitely weren't her first choice when she wanted to hang out. They're not my friends; they were kind of just...accessories. And she had treated them as such. She hadn't bothered to get to know them. They were all the same to her: cheerleaders, drill team girls, gymnasts, dancers―it didn't matter. Each girl had something about her that made her special and it dawned on Jane that she had never bothered to learn anything beyond their name and whether or not they wanted to hook up. I have to fix this. Right now, I don't deserve a girlfriend.

Jane kissed the forehead of the beautiful girl still asleep in her arms. "I'm going to be a better person for you even if I can't be with you."