"Red, it's time to get up sweetheart. You have things to do, I love you Red remember who you..."
Jane woke up in her own bed in her own home; she was alone, why was she alone? Her dad never left her alone.
"Daddy? I can't find you. Where are you? Don't leave me daddy, daddy!"
Jane was jerked from the dream by a pounding in her head, sitting up she blinked a few times and opened her eyes to a blinding white light. The light dimmed and she found herself in the sterile white environment of the Medical Ward. Blinking a few more times the white counter in front of her was replaced by the grey skin and piercing eyes of Commander Vyrnnus.
"Ah, you're awake. You talk in your sleep Vandrel. Oh right, you're a Shepard here. Its funny these humans hate me, you can tell by the look in their eyes. The thing is, you're right in their midst and because you look human they think you'd choose them over us."
Jane didn't move just listened to Vyrnnus without moving her eyes from his, her expression blank.
"Ask yourself Jane, if I gave you the chance to go back to Ganis and Nihlus, even if you had to fight your way out at the cost of their lives, would you even think twice? You're no more human than I am Jane, though it disgusts me to say it." He pointed to her shoulder and she still didn't move. "I assume Nihlus gave you that mark. The reason I suspect that, is he is what caused your biotics to come out, you loved him."
Jane didn't bite; she remained still and unresponsive to his goading.
Vyrnnus's brow plate lifted slightly. "You're more Turian than even I wanted to admit. It'll be fun breaking you Jane, making that weak human side that I know is hiding in there come out." He bent low so he was inches from her face but instead of speaking directly to her he spoke to the Turian by the door. "Limit consumption of water and all food, rations only. I want everyone in the training room by 0500 every morning. If they complain let them know it's punishment for Jane Shepard interfering in my training."
He didn't move from her side and Jane kept her eyes straight ahead, she heard his mandibles flutter and then click against his face as he pulled them back. He was smirking at her, taunting her.
"I'll break you Jane, and because I know Ganis and what he would have taught you about interrogation, I'll go through them to do it. Up on your feet."
Jane was up and at attention almost instantly.
"They will hate you Jane, you'll be more alone than you could ever imagine. That human you think you saved is waiting in the hall for you." His head quirked to the left as he watched her eyes. "What would Nihlus think of you protecting a human so soon after he'd marked you? You wouldn't be interested in this human would you?"
Jane kept her eyes forward mouth closed. "Ah, well maybe you had other reasons for being so stupid. We'll see if we can't make those biotics come out in you soon enough; dismissed Shepard."
Jane saluted about-faced and left the Medical bay, almost slamming headlong into Kaidan who was just outside the door.
"Shepard! Should you be up so soon? Those implants can really." Jane held up a finger at Kaidan but he didn't stop. "Mess you up, trust me I know."
The sigh that Jane gave was one of frustration and exasperation with Kaidan for not halting his rambling.
"Alenko, I believe you and I have studying to do, correct? Can we continue with that please?"
"Uh, yeah sure Shepard, but don't you think we should talk about."
"No, I don't." Jane made a sharp right turn into her bunk grabbed the data pads Kaidan had given her and spun on her heel making her way towards the library. Kaidan had to jog to keep up with her clip.
The library was large and mostly empty; grabbing a table in the back Jane yanked the chair back and sat.
Kaidan paused at the table before pulling back his own chair and sitting in front of her.
"Shepard I want to thank you for."
Holding up a finger Jane looked directly into Kaidan's eyes. "I said I didn't want to talk about it and I don't, leave it and for spirits sake don't thank me."
That's how it went; Jane kept to herself meeting only with Kaidan for their lessons, the distance she thought would keep them safe. But the distance was noticed among the students who had been told that the reduced meals and the new drills were her fault, and her distance bred distrust and anger.
~~00o00~~
"This is bullshit Kaidan, we need to do something. Six months of little to no food, drills at O'fuck thirty. I can't take this much longer." Andy slumped against the wall of the training room.
"What the fuck does that Turian want from us?" Andy's eyes landed on where Shepard was doing sit ups by herself in the corner of the room. Her hair was now short as the Turian had made her cut it; it hung about her face in sweaty strands.
"It's her fault, if she'd just do what he wants."
Kaidan rounded on Andy and kicked his foot. "What makes you think he wants anything from her?"
"Don't you protect her Kaidan. She's one of them; you can see it as well as the rest of us. Look at her she doesn't stop, doesn't talk to us." Andy was on his feet and he shoved Kaidan back from him.
Kaidan caught himself and was back inches from Andy's face. "She's suffering just as much as the rest of us Andy."
"Get out of my face Alenko." The first blast from Andy sent Kaidan reeling against the far wall of the room.
Vyrnnus stood back and smiled. "Finally, some fight in one of you." He stepped forward. "Now Alenko retaliate." Kaidan turned cold eyes to Vyrnnus.
"I won't play your sick games Commander." Kaidan folded his arms over his chest and didn't budge.
"Oh no? Shepard! Front and center." Jane had halted her sit-ups when she heard the commotion on the other side of the room. She stood now and made her way to Vyrnnus standing at attention before him.
"Smith is it? They all call you Andy right? Who are you really mad at? Alenko here or Shepard?" The look Andy turned on Shepard was cold enough to freeze her blood. "Alright then, you'd like to see Alenko here punish her for all the things mean ol' Commander Vyrnnus has done?" Andy nodded and the smile Vyrnnus turned on her caused her breath to hitch.
"You heard him Alenko, attack Shepard, Shepard protect yourself."
Neither Shepard nor Alenko moved.
"I said Attack!" Vyrnnus was inches from Alenko's face and he was yelling now.
"Do as I say and I'll lift the water and food restriction. Wouldn't that be nice, a hot meal for everyone?"
That got a few of the students around the room involved. Stepping forward they started shouting for Kaidan to do it.
"I told you Commander, I'm not playing your sick games."
"We'll see about that." In one motion Vyrnnus had Rahna by the arm and pinned against his chest his side arm pressed to her head.
"Do it or I won't be responsible for the consequences."
Kaidan's face went pale. "You wouldn't, it would, and you would." Kaidan stumbled unsure of what the Turian would actually do.
"I wouldn't be so sure, ask Shepard there if I'm capable of what I promise."
Kaidan turned back to Jane her face blank again but she nodded and whispered. "Do it Alenko."
"I can't Shepard."
"I said, fucking do it." Kaidan was thrown off, he had never heard her cuss before and now she was advancing on him. Her first attack landed to his chest knocking the air out of him, as she went for the sweep to knock him down he finally retaliated.
His first punch and biotic blast landed on the right side of her face her head snapped to the side and she regained her footing, no longer in control of his anger he landed three more blows to her chin arms and legs before rounding on her and releasing a blast that struck her in the center of the chest. She slumped against the far wall eyes closed and what he would swear was a smile on her lips.
He realised as he stood staring at her too still body, that she hadn't once used her biotic attacks on him; his breathing was returning to normal as Vyrnnus shoved past him and crouched next to Jane's body. He could hear him talking to her unconscious form.
"Stubborn girl Shepard, when will you learn, I win this game."
Standing back from her he regarded the students in front of him. "You're all dismissed, get a hot meal and hit your bunks." No one moved and he growled his sub harmonics causing almost all of them to jump. "I said move!" The room emptied and all that was left was the Commander, Alenko and Jane who still wasn't moving. The commander had his back to him now and spoke without turning.
"That means you Alenko."
"You knew she wouldn't fight back. Why did you?"
"Leave or you'll join her."
He still didn't move and Vyrnnus called for his sergeant. "Have Shepard here removed, solitary when she wakes up."
"You, Alenko are the hero of the day. Why don't you go enjoy your meal with your friends? I'm sure they appreciate what you did. I'm sure your girlfriend wants to give you a special thank you for saving her life."
Vyrnnus's laughter followed Kaidan as he turned and left the room.
~~00o00~~
When she finally awoke, Jane found herself in a dark room. Her head throbbed and her body ached, rolling to her side Jane squeezed her eyes closed at the pain and nausea that was threatening to overtake her. She tried to will herself back into unconsciousness to no avail.
Her thoughts wandered to her dad and Nihlus. She longed to hear their voices, see their faces. The tears that stung her eyes did not fall however and she mused that it was the only battle she had won that day.
Jane slammed her fist down on the bed where she was laying. She couldn't believe Vyrnnus could control her so easily.
Rolling on to her back the darkness soon overcame her and she slept. Though it was not at all peaceful, dreams of her dad alone and Nihlus dying on some mission she should have been there for haunted her sleep.
Jane had no concept of time in the darkness of the room. She slept off and on, sometimes waking and finding a glass of water and a ration pack. When the door finally opened Vyrnnus entered the room and leaned against the far wall from her.
"You thought you were being so noble didn't you Jane? Unfortunately your little plan to martyr yourself for the students had the reverse effect. I've given them their food back due to Alenko following my orders and more have taken to it. A few who don't have it in them have had to be, ah, removed. But you see they think, no they know it's your fault that I've pushed them so hard. Get up Shepard and grab a shower, I expect you at drills in thirty. Move it."
~~00o00~~
"I for one hope they keep her locked up. If she wouldn't have taunted him none of this would have happened."
The group was gathered at their normal spot in the mess hall and Kaidan had just about had enough of them.
"Listen you guys, it's not her fault, and he's trying to break her using us. What she did was to protect us. She saved Rahna. How can you be so blind?"
"All I see Kaidan is that now that she's gone things aren't so bad." Andy glared over his food towards Kaidan.
"Things aren't so bad? Right, so the three students that have suddenly died from "biotic strain" isn't so bad?"
"You know as well as the rest of us that biotics are dangerous they always tell us that, accidents are going to happen."
"You're fooling yourself Andy. Forget this we've got drills let's go."
Kaidan saw Jane as soon as he entered the room. She was stiff at attention but he could see the slight bend in her back and her face was pale and drawn, her eyes dim. She didn't look at them when they entered keeping her eyes on Vyrnnus in the front of the room.
They formed ranks and stood at attention waiting. Vyrnnus walked between them and broke them into pairs.
"I want you to square off with your partners. Biotics to disable in hand to hand. We've been working on this; I want you to start light building your skills to disarm your opponent."
Jane had been paired up with Rahna and even in her weak state had her disarmed and on the floor in three moves. Rahna hadn't even touched her. Jane dropped back and let Rahna return to her feet. Jane dropped back into her ready stance and waited for Rahna to attack her. She easily deflected her blows and once again had her on the floor.
Vyrnnus caught sight of this from where he stood at the front of the class and stormed his way over to the pair.
"Shepard! What didn't you understand about my instructions? You're to use your biotics in disarming your opponent." He set the two aside. "Now, resume your attacks." Rahna's hands glowed a white blue as she advanced on Jane. Jane ground her teeth and once again this time with biotics attacked Rahna landing a massive blow to her face and chest before Rahna dropped to the ground.
Vyrnnus stood over Jane and was yelling at her, the rest of the class had stopped to watch them.
"Finish it Shepard. She's weak, the weak will not survive. Finish it!"
Within Jane's hands grew a bright blue orb, she held it in front of Rahna and the class gasped a few made to run forward but were held back by Vyrnnus's men.
"That's right Jane, do it finish the human."
Jane's eyes narrowed and she released the orb, not at Rahna but at Vyrnnus and he was knocked back off his feet. It only took a moment after he hit his back for him to kick jump back to standing and he advanced on Jane, his blows were fast and perfectly placed. Jane was lying on her stomach as Vyrnnus crouched over her lifting her head by her hair. "Big mistake Shepard."
Vyrnnus pulled her back up and Vyrnnus dropped to his ready stance and motioned for Jane to attack him. In her weak state Jane's hand to hand was not what it should have been and he easily deflected her blows knocking her back to the ground he was on top of her pulling her head back as far as he could. "Do it Jane, cry like I know you want to. Ask me to stop." Her head made a sickening thump as it hit the ground. The sound that Vyrnnus wanted to hear was not what happened next. Jane was laughing at him and he pulled her head back again bending low next to her face.
"You're not proving anything Jane, cry for me, show me how human you are, show me I was right, that your "dad" should have left you down there when we found you. That I should have killed you then, that you are just like them." His voice dripped with the hatred he felt for her.
Her head hit the ground again and Kaidan couldn't take it anymore running forward through the men he slid to a stop on his knees before her.
"Jane, do what he asks. Do what he wants he's going to kill you. Don't do this you don't have to prove anything." Vyrnnus let this exchange happen and whispered close to her ear. "Do as the little human boy says Jane. Give in and all of this goes away."
Jane lifted her swollen eyes to Kaidan and gave a weak smile. When she spoke it was forceful and directed solely at the commander.
"How does it feel Sir?"
"How does what feel Jane?" His voice was low and near her ear again.
She grimaced as his talons dug into her head as he griped her tighter.
"How does it feel Commander, to know that a human is a better Turian than you could ever hope to be?"
He growled and slammed his fist into her jaw. Blackness swallowed Jane and her body went limp. "We'll see how proud you are when I'm through with you."
Removing himself from her he motioned for her to be removed.
"Solitary if she wakes up, keep her there until further notice." Turning his attention to the other students he clasped his hands behind his back talons tapping as he thought.
"Sergeant I want meals cut, back on rations. Also I think that cutting the hot water for a while will help everyone realise that what Miss Shepard did here was not heroics but a selfish act. Should any of you find yourself wanting to repeat her mistake I can assure you it won't go as well for you as it did her and your friends will suffer for your insubordination."
~~00o00~~
"Kaidan forget it, she's dead. No one could do six months of solitary and live."
Kaidan paced his room his bunkmates were concerned for him he knew. His behavior had become more and more erratic as the time wore on. The rumors were that Shepard had recovered from the fight but since she had not been released it was largely believed that she had died while in confinement or that Vyrnnus had just simply finished what he started.
"She's not dead, I know that. She wouldn't give up."
"Kaidan, listen to yourself, you're waiting for a ghost to come back. She's dead, leave it, we've been working on breaking into the extranet to get a message to the Alliance. We haven't heard anything from them in over a year. It's like they've left us here, if they wait longer there won't be any of us left."
~~00o00~~
"Jane, Jane. Wake up Jane."
"mmph, Nihlus? Ugh, no please just five more." She tried to roll over but couldn't move. She felt his forehead against hers and she smiled.
"Jane, wake up." She felt his talons stroking her face and she smiled nuzzling into his hand, then the hand was gone and she felt the slap rip open her cheek as his talons scraped across her face. Her eyes opened and it wasn't Nihlus but Vyrnnus sitting next to her.
This mental warfare had gone on forever, just how long she didn't know, time had no place in this darkness that he had thrown her. This time though something broke in her and she wept, the tears stung the new wounds on her face and she felt the Turian next to her chuckle.
"You we're strong Jane." With that he shoved her crying into the hall. The lights were so bright she would have sworn she was staring into a sun. She looked down at her dirty and torn clothes and he walked with her towards the showers.
"There's a good girl, have a shower and change. Get something to eat." He lifted her tear-stained face to his, his voice was soft but there was hate in his eyes. "I told you I would break you Jane. You know I see why Nihlus wanted you. I think perhaps I'll follow-up for him on that." Leaning his head against hers, she wanted to recoil but didn't have the energy.
"Go have your shower, I'll see you soon."
Jane sat in the corner of the shower letting the water pour over her, the tears once they had started wouldn't stop and she couldn't get the feeling of Vyrnnus's head against hers out of her mind, where Nihlus's had so often rested in a loving embrace. Vyrnnus's embrace wasn't loving, it was controlling, she knew now that all he had wanted was to control her, and now that she knew that, she had nothing left in her to fight him.
~~00o00~~
Kaidan had heard the rumor that Jane had been seen in the halls. He hadn't believed it at first as no one could pin point where she was.
He had looked and finally found her in the library head down reading a data pad. Her head didn't lift as he entered, when he pulled out the chair across from her she flinched and pulled back.
"Jane I." His words were lost as she lifted a scared and bruised face to him.
"Jesus Jane what did he do to you?"
Jane tried to shrug but grimaced at the pain in her shoulder.
Kaidan moved next to her and pulled her to him. She went stiff and then broke down as the sobs ripped through her.
"Jane, Jane what did that bastard do to you? We were so sure you were dead."
The sobs wouldn't stop and she cried against his chest until she couldn't cry anymore.
He continued to hold her and in a shaking voice she finally answered him. "I want my dad Kaidan, I want to go home." He squeezed her tighter but she resisted and pushed back from him.
"I can't let him see us together." She was up and out of the room before he could stop her.
~~00o00~~
Kaidan watched Jane closely at formation the next morning.
Gone were her proud posture and stance, her eyes no longer faced forward but instead focused on a spot in front of her feet.
Vyrnnus seemed to approve of this and Kaidan watched the commanders hand drag over her shoulders and touch her cheeks as she practiced moving large objects with her biotics. His touch caused Jane to flinch and pull back into herself and this only seemed to please Vyrnnus more.
Kaidan felt the pain in his chest and realised he cared about Jane and hated to see her like this. This girl who had been so strong, who had protected him, had that really been over a year ago? He sighed, he wanted to talk to her but every time he got near her she just handed him a data pad that proved to him that she had started on her English and history studies again and then she left without a word.
She was broken and he didn't know what to do.