APOV
I'm waiting anxiously. I really hope that Christian likes the party that I had put together for him. After I had practically walked out of his penthouse, I went to my office to grab some files on the issue that Andrew fucked up on, and then I had come to the Mile High to wait with the guests for Christian.
"Hey, stop. You are going to rip your hands apart." Kate's voice comes from behind me.
"I don't know Kate. I don't know if he will like this, and to be honest I really want him to like it. He hasn't had a birthday party since he was nine, so clearly there is something he doesn't like about them right?"
Kate gives me a small comforting smile that really doesn't do much. "It'll be fine Ana. Don't worry. Besides if it doesn't, you can always show him the party in the sheets." She gives me a wink. I can't help the flush that creeps on me when I remember what we did today morning in the shower, and I see her eyes widen.
"ANA! Did you sex with him?" she whisper shouts. Great! Wonderful Kate. Tell the whole world will you?
"Stop being so crude Kate" I chastise. She looks at me incredulously.
"What do you want me to say? Here, did you bump uglies? Did you do the deed? Does that help?"
"God Kate. Really? No it doesn't. You know you are the only, and I mean the only person who can talk to me like this and get away with it." I shake my ahead at her.
"You know you love me. Now, tell me. How good is he in bed? Oh god, he is not like those men who look really good and can't even last a minute is he?"
"Shut up Kate. He is good"
"Good? Like good as in grandpa good or like toe curling, mind blowing good?" She is not going to stop. Jesus.
"Fine, toe curling, mind blowing, body numbing good alright. Now, be quiet they are going to be here any time soon!"
As expected, Christian and Elliot walk in very soon followed by their family. At first Christian doesn't notice as he is engaged in a deep conversation with Elliot. But, when he looks up, his face is absolutely priceless. It morphs from shock to anger to...admiration, and his mouth slightly parts.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY Mr. GREY/CHRISTIAN" everyone cheers. He puts on a charming smile, one that he gives to the outsiders. It's so fake that I can tell from across the room, but I am not sure if anyone else notices it. He scans the crowd for until his gaze lands on my face. Everyone parts, so that there is a direct path between me and Christian. His face is graced by soft features, but as he approaches me, I notice the traces of anger and shock linger in his eyes. He lifts my chin up, and in a smooth move captures my lips with his. It's for show Ana. Remember that. He feels nothing, absolutely nothing for you. He pulls away from the gentle kiss and rests his forehead on mine.
"You do realize you didn't have to create a scene at home to accomplish this right?" He doesn't realize that what happened was not for a show. That was...me. He doesn't realize that is who I am...a detached cold human being.
"I-I..." I stumble. I don't know what to say.
"Thank you...for everything" he murmurs. With one last kiss, he parts, and addresses his friends and family.
"Thank you all so much!" That is all he is able to say before Elliot interrupts with a wide grin on his face.
"Ladies and gentleman, it is time for the birthday baby [cue Christian's glare as the crowd laughs] and his beautiful wife to dance"
Locked Away by Adam Levine comes on
Christian wraps an arm around mine and leads me to the middle of the dance floor. I clasp my hands around his neck while his are around my waist and we move..slowly, gently...lovingly to the somewhat fast paced beat of the song. We are dancing to our own music as we stare into each other's eyes.
If I should you my flaws. If I couldn't be strong, tell me honestly, would you still love me the same?
I am scared. So scared of hurting this man who has wormed his way into my life in this short period of time. I am a monster...trash..If I let him in any more than I already have, I am only going to burden him. I don't deserve him at all, I tell my self. "6 months Ana. Only 6 more months"
Baby would you say goodbye, would you tell me right now?
"Elliot told me you haven't had a birthday party since you were 9. Why?" I whisper. I see his eyes droop and he sighs, turning his face away as he stares into the crowd that is dancing around us.
"I'll tell you when we get home alright. You deserve to know" There is it again...home. Is it my home? When I think about this, I can't help but wonder if I will ever have a home. Pathetic, I know. But, I couldn't help it.
And there we are. Two ruthless business moguls dancing together in business attire like we are in love, when in reality, it is simply a business contract.
1 Hour Later...
He thrust into me hard, holding himself up on his forearms. I could see the strain on his face, and he leaned down and captured my nipple with his mouth, nipping it before licking to soothe the pain.
I moaned out, dragging my nails down his back.
"Harder. Harder Christian" I panted. I could feel him pick up the pace, trying to ram into with more intensity. I knew we will both have bruises tomorrow at the rate we were going at it. Suddenly he stopped, and he pulled away from my nipple with a stricken look on his face.
"Condom" I could feel his panic.
"Birth control. Its fine. Keep going" I reassured him. His shoulders sagged with relief and he resumed his sinful thrusting, grinding into me between every few. This time, instead of sucking my nipple, his lips met mine. I responded quickly, moving mine against his. And one particularly hard thrust led me to gasp into his mouth, allowing his tongue entrance. He traced my lips with his tongue, before meeting my own.
I could feel the pleasure increasing, taking me to he peak.
"Come with me Ana. Come on" he groaned.
His hand moves down to my clit, circling it and rubbing it hard enough to make me scream out. "Now" he commands, and we come together gloriously. I could feel the warmth inside me as his own release coats my insides. He rests his forehead against mine before, rolling to the side, pulling me along with him, with him still inside me.
We stare into each other's eyes. And as awfully romantic it may sound, it...kind of wasn't. It was as if we were trying to analyze each other, trying to figure out out personalities, and flaws. There was no love here. Only lust, and some trust.
He speaks up, breaking the silence.
"It was during my ninth birthday when someone said to me..'AWW...Your birth mother must be so proud of such a wonderful little boy' For some reason, that struck home. I-I...I don't tell you this, and I don't exactly tell everyone but...I..I trust you. Ok?" He didn't let me speak, but kept going, revealing a part of himself to me. "So long story short. She was a prostitute and a drug addict, her pimp used to abuse me, which is why I never let anyone touch me. And then she died when I was 4. So when, someone said that, I was reminded of a time when my birth mother left me to die basically. If she was proud of me...or if she even cared...why did she let all that happen? I felt like I didn't deserve to live if my mother hated me so much that she left me. I hated my birthdays ever since...it was a day that wasn't supposed to happen. I wasn't supposed to live. I..."
I silence him with a deep kiss.
"I am sorry. I am not going to pity you because I know you don't want that...But, I am sorry that you felt that way. I told you this today morning, and I will continue to tell you this...You deserve to be happy, for who you are. Your birth mother doesn't represent you. And you know what? There are so many people that care about you...Elliot, Mia, Grace, your dad...even Taylor...I-I am not sure if I will be with you forever...but just be happy..ok?"
"What about you then?"
"What about me?"
"It's not like you are happy either-"
"Don't go there Christian"
"Why not? Why are you so tied down to your past, huh? Is it-"
"Don't. I know you think you get it...but you really don't."
"Tell me Anastasia. Make me understand"
"I-I...Later ok? I just want to be with you for the time we have left before I leave" His arms harden around me.
"Leave?" he growls.
"You heard me when I was on the phone right...I am leaving to go to New York and then I have to go to Africa" He pushes me away so he can see my face
"So that wasn't part of the whole surprise thing huh...?"
"No it wasn't...that was real. I run a charity where we donate money, clothing, food and also help provide jobs..anything really to kids in Sierra Leone, and other parts of Africa as well. The idiot Andrew...who used to be the head of that department fucked up again...he messed up and now those kids and families that were dependent on this are now suffering because of his actions...And, I need to clean this up...so that they don't suffer...I can't let them"
He tugs me closer to his chest, and I wrap my arms around his middle while I listen to his heartbeat. "I know you won't...I get it. When will you be back?"
"I don't know...hopefully between 2-4 weeks"
"Ok. But next time...it would be nice if you could explain instead of yelling at me that it is not my business"
I smile sheepishly. "Sorry...I am just not used to being asked why and all that from other people...I guess it made me feel controlled for a second"
I lied. That is only part of the reason. The other half was that we were way to personal already..sharing our pasts and all that...if he got involved in everything...the harder it is going to be for me to leave him at the end of this 6 months. I don't think I could handle it.
"It's fine." I guess that's what caused my eyes to water for a second. By no means did I cry...but I could feel that pang in my chest when he said that. The fact that he was ok with how I was feeling...like he understood. He didn't hate me for who I made myself out to be.
We left at 1:30...We both got up, dressed and everything quietly. I insisted that he did't have to come, but he did anyways...which made me smile. He chalked it up to playing the role of a good husband..but I could tell it was something else.
When I had to leave on the plane, and started towards it...he grasped my arm quickly, and turned me around, pulling me into his chest. I could never forget those grey eyes that he looked at me with. He pulled me in for a lasting kiss. One where there was no lust, but one of comfort, hope and longing. It was the best kiss he had given me...and I knew that I would cherish it for the rest of my life...because it showed that he cared. There was someone who cared.
Leaning his forehead against mine, he spoke quietly. "Come back to me"
And without thinking, I said "I will. Always." Only, if I knew what those words meant at that time.
AN:Hey guys! Thank you so much for sticking with me. There is so much more to this story...and I hope you are all really excited. I am extremely busy right now...school, standardized testing...and other applications. JESUS! PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW...Ill try my best to update as soon as possible. I am not happy leaving you guys unsatisfied...so I WILL TRY MY BEST PROMISE!
ALSO...IF THERE IS ANY PART OF A CHARACTER OR PLOT THAT YOU DON"T LIKE...WRITE IT IN THE REVIEWSLET ME KNOW. I WILL SEE IF I CAN CHANGE IT FOR YOU. NO GUARANTEES. BUT IT WILL BE CONSIDERED