The only noise in Johns quarters were the slight hum of his console, and the even breathing of Liara, who as he glanced over from his chair, he thought couldn't look more peaceful, or beautiful. As with all things peaceful, it was not to last, his comm beeped and Joker cleared his throat.

"I hate to interrupt Major, but your father, uh; rather the Admiral is on comm for you."

"Thanks Joker, I'll take it here." John bit back the urge to cuss, rising from his chair and walking towards the bed.

"Um, Major your, the Admiral was specific that you be alone."

"Of course, he can't just want to have a nice fatherly chat." Liara was already sitting up, as he reached her side. She gave him a crooked smile as she gathered her things, kissed him quickly, and left the room without another word.

Closing his eyes, John prepared himself to deal with his father; squaring his shoulders he hit the comm.

"Major Hackett here, you wanted to speak to me Admiral?"

"Yes I did John, it took you long enough. Do I need to reinforce what your quarters are actually for?"

His jaw twitched as he held back a sigh.

"No Sir, I'm very aware of what my quarters are for. Now, was there something I can do for you Admiral? I expect, you didn't wish to speak to me of my sleeping arrangements."

"You're right John, I don't. Have a seat, we need to talk."

"Is this a father, son talk; or a Major, Admiral talk?" John asked as he took his chair again.

"It's a little of both actually. I know you don't approve of how I do things sometimes. I want you to know that everything I've done, I've always done for the Alliance. You were there with Jane, you know the threat we face. I honestly wish I could tell you everything John, but I can't, you know how it works."

There was the father, son part.

"Sure Sir, I know how it works, you keep us in the dark until shit hits the fan, people die, and then you give us just enough information to maybe keep someone else from dying. So sure I understand Sir, perfectly."

The Admiral didn't respond to this, just continued on as if John hadn't even spoken.

"That being said, what I am about to tell you is one of those things, I need you to understand, and as a Major in the Alliance I need you to comply with. No matter what; is that understood?"

And here is the Admiral, Major part he thought, as a slight smirk pulled at the corner of his mouth.

"There has been, a development, and I need you to meet me at the coordinates I'm sending you. When you get here, I ask that you come alone. I will meet you there, and you will be briefed on the situation. Thank you Major, that is all."

As the comm went silent, John stared at the coordinates in confusion. The middle of nowhere, not a planet, not a satellite, and no space station listed; just empty space. Running a hand through his hair, causing it to stand on end, John released the breath he was holding. What the hell had his father done now?

~~00o00~~

As the Normandy reached the Coordinates his father had given him, John chuckled deep in his chest.

John heard Joker snort, and looked down into a wide grin. "Well what do you know Major, there is a station here. You know what that means? It's the secret kind, love those. What do you think they have down there?"

"Take me in Joker; and I'll find out. Remember no one is to accompany me. Please make sure everyone stays aboard the Normandy. My father gets grouchy when people don't do exactly as he says."

Joker rolled his eyes. "Yeah, sounds like he was a real treat to grow up with."

"Yup, but I didn't know any better, well until it was too late." John shrugged, turning towards the exit.

"Well not sure it means much coming from me Major, but you're twice the man your father is. We all have really enjoyed serving under you." Joker pursed his lips trying not to break down laughing as his eyes turned to Liara. "Some more than others, Sir."

John turned red almost instantly, and quickened his pace to leave the Normandy; he could hear Jokers laughter echoing behind him as the doors closed.

~~00o00~~

As the air lock to the station closed behind him, John took a deep breath, and wrinkled his nose. It smelled like a hospital in here, he hated that smell, ever since his mom. His thought was broken as his father strode into the room.

"I'm surprised you made it Admiral. Don't you like to direct people's lives from behind your desk lately?" John bit the inside of his cheek, regretting the words as soon as he had said them. Not because they weren't true, but because he didn't need his father pissed at him, and making his life even more difficult.

The Admiral narrowed his eyes slightly at John.

"I'm glad to see you made it, in decent time too. I'll have to mark this one down on the calendar. Now if you're done with your comments Major, follow me."

John followed his father through the narrow corridor, and to a small office.

"Have a seat Major." John slid the chair back taking his seat, just as a young woman joined them in the room. The Admiral motioned towards a chair and she sat as well. His father of course did not sit, choosing instead his favorite stance, parade rest hands behind his back.

"Major, this is Miranda Lawson; she will be helping me explain the situation."

John's eyes fluttered close, as he drew a deep breath in through his nose, trying to calm his nerves and the growing pit in his stomach. The woman to his left, most assuredly had a Cerberus emblem on her uniform. Why in the name of all that was good and holy, would his father have him come to a Cerberus station, let alone be here himself? He kept his mouth shut, his gaze shifting from his father and back to the woman.

"What we are about to tell you Major, is going to be hard to understand. But, I need you to remember yourself. And above all Major, you will do as I say."

John's eyes flashed to his fathers, but his father wasn't there. This was the Admiral, and it didn't matter that he was his son, that tone meant that if he didn't do what he said, there would be consequences. Ones that he didn't care to even think about.

"Sir, yes Sir."

"Very good Major, and yes I see you eyeing the badge on her uniform, or at least I hope that's what had you gawking." Admiral Hackett quirked an eyebrow and John simply nodded once.

"As you know Major, we do not actively announce that the Alliance would work with Cerberus, but sometimes, we need things done; things that we don't want our fingerprints on. This is where Cerberus comes in. This, was one of those things, Cerberus recovered Commander Shepards' body."

"Why would the Alliance not want their fingerprints on that?" John asked cutting his father off, his voice more than a little shocked.

"If you would let me finish Major, Cerberus found her body and thanks to the technology both you and she were fitted with as children they were able to, well the best word to use would be, resuscitate her. Of course that's not going to be the official story."

Johns face screwed up into a look of confusion, and horror.

"You, they, did what, with the what, in us?" He stuttered, staring first at his father, and then Miranda.

"You know that both, you and Shepard were modified as children."

John lifted both eyebrows, and motioned towards himself in a flourish.

"Sure, modified genetically normal, what you are saying was done because of it, not normal. You had better start talking."

Staring at a nail, and picking at it with his thumb, Admiral Hackett raised his eyes slowly to Johns, and gave a dismissive flick with his finger.

"When you were children, we had made discoveries at lightning speed. The Galaxy was all of a sudden a smaller place. After our discovery on Mars, our researchers were learning what we thought was Prothean technology. We discovered, we were wrong, as we started finding beacons, we realized that there was something else. What Jane called, Reapers, of course we didn't know that at the time. After we saw Sovereign we knew she was right, and that the technology we had started to learn was in fact not Prothean, but their research into them."

John sat frozen; his Jaw slack, before he shook his head and blinked to clear the red from his vision. "You, you put Reaper technology into children?"

"To be fair John we thought it was Prothean at the time. We were looking for a way to make you and them, stronger, faster superior in every way. And we succeeded; you and Jane are proof of that. Eyesight, hearing mobility, everything, and you are perfect."

"But at what fucking cost, father? How many didn't make it? How could you offer your own children for something like that?"

"Easy, the Alliance asked, I accepted. If it ever came to outright war, like we experienced during the First Contact War; we needed soldiers who could stand up to whatever the Galaxy could throw at us."

John closed his eyes and rubbed his temples, he couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"Okay, forgetting for a moment that you sound completely insane, let's get back to Jane, she's alive? And you what, brought her back from the dead, using yet more Reaper tech, even though you know they tried to kill us. Sure, why the fuck not, that makes perfect sense."

"I wasn't willing to lose Shepard like that."

"You mean you weren't willing to lose your investment like that. So, where is she?"

"You will watch your tone Major, and Shepard is here. She's ready to return. But there are a few, let's say, conditions you must be aware of."

John motioned for him to continue, with a flip of his hand, he knew it was a trait he got from the man, and hated it now, more than ever.

"Miss Lawson, if you will explain." Admiral Hackett stepped to the side as Miranda stood.

"The Commander has returned with an impaired memory, perhaps impaired is the wrong word. She came back with absolutely no memory of her former life. Every memory she now has, was given to her by us. The Admiral instructed us, on what she was to learn and remember. The official story, the one she believes as well, is that she was wounded on Ilos, that Staff Lieutenant Alenko followed her order and left to finish the mission. That she did not die, and we rescued her in time to save her."

"What do you mean, the Admiral instructed you on what she was to remember? " John turned his eyes from hers, and stared up at the man he wasn't even sure he could call father, without being sick.

"Jane has no memories of certain aspects of her former life."

"Such as what?" John drummed his fingers on his knee, this was impossible, what the hell was going on?

Miranda glanced towards Admiral Hackett, he nodded and she continued.

"Jane's memory of Randiv is quite different, she has been told she was kidnapped, and returned after being held through most of the First Contact War. She really has no true memories until fifteen and Jump Zero. She was given the details of what happened to her there, and after, skipping things, and people the Admiral felt would be harmful, to Commander Shepard pushing forward with her mission."

"You did fucking what? You can't do that. That was her life, her dad, Nihlus, Garrus for Christ sakes. You can't just take those memories from her; they are what made her who she is. You can't tell her they kidnapped her! How could you, how could you do this to your own daughter?" John was up on his feet, his face was red as he pointed an accusing finger at his father.

Admiral Hackett narrowed cold eyes at John. "Actually ever since her memories were modified, has been the only time she's even chosen to recognise me as her father. So, if you're done acting like a child, we will explain how you're going to help her maintain this."

"You want me to what? No, I'm not going to help you in your sick little mind game. This is bullshit. You tell her the truth, Jane was just fine the way she was before."

"Major, you will do as I say, that is an order."

John's mouth snapped closed. He hated that he had once given a shit what this man wanted, and he'd be damned if he was going to do any of it.

"Jane knows myself, you and she knows she is engaged to Alenko. She was told of how she was kidnapped from a military base during her stay there as a child. She was told that she was rescued and sent to Jump Zero, the rest you know.

A bitter dark laugh bubbled out of John as he shook his head.

"This is never going to work, there are plenty of people who know how much she loves her dad. Not to mention, Kaidan watched her die, he's never going to believe this bullshit story. Even he's not that dumb."

"And to those people Major, you will inform that she has had extreme trauma and memory loss, and that its not good to speak of such things with her. Use your imagination, you'll be fine. As far as Alenko is concerned you will tell him anything you like, except what actually happened. Tell him she was close to death, but we made it in time. That it took a lot of time and rehab to get her back to this point. Two years, he'll be so beside himself just seeing her that he won't think twice. Not to mention she isn't mad at him, nor is she with a Turian. As far as she knows they are still together, have been ever since N7 training. If he asks you, tell him she can't remember their fights and he should count himself lucky, and not screw it up this time. Understood Major or should I write it down?"

John ignored his snide remark, and made a flippant gesture to the room. "You want me to lie to her, to her face; to what end? What is the fucking point of all of this?"

"To do what you were designed for Major that is all, I want you to do your job. We have reports of entire human colonies going missing. I want to know why; I want to know if it has to do with the Reapers. You two, are going to figure this out. Now Major if you don't mind, I'll take you to Jane, and we'll get the two of you ready to go."

John stood, raking a hand through his hair. He didn't want to do this, but he couldn't leave her with them either. The best plan of action, he decided was to get her as far away from here as possible, and see what could be done to fix this completely fucked up beyond all recognition, god damn situation.

~~00o00~~

John was shown into a room, Jane was on one side tossing things into a bag, she grabbed her boots with her biotics and moved them towards the bag dropping them in. He blinked, he had never seen her use her biotics. More than just her memory was changed he noted.

"John! They told me you were coming. I'm just about ready and we can move out."

John sucked in a deep breath and tried to steady his nerves.

"Well, before that Jane, I think I need to go back to the Normandy and prepare them for this, I don't want anyone dropping dead from shock. Give me thirty, and I'll be back and we'll leave then."

She nodded. "Yeah, heard and understood."

He nodded and walked back the way he had come, he couldn't stop his hands from shaking; he fisted them at his sides and made for the air lock. His father stepped in front of him halting his progress.

"Major, before you leave, your mission is listed here, along with a list of people I want you to pick up at the Citadel. They are the additions to your team, some are very off the books but I've had them gathered, and you are to retrieve them and pursue the issue we spoke of earlier, its all listed here."

He handed him the data pad. "Good luck Major."

John's eyes narrowed and he simply nodded continuing past him, and to the Normandy.

"Joker, I want everyone gathered at the bridge in five." John gave the order as he turned making his way directly to Alenko.

He heard the call from Joker for all hands to report, and just as he turned the corner, Kaidan was coming out of his quarters.

"Kaidan, I need to talk to you, now." His voice was urgent and Kaidan stopped eyebrows raised.

"Of course Major, what is it."

John pointed to a chair in the mess. "Sit."

Kaidan did so, his eyes still staring in confusion at him.

John released a long sigh, pacing on the other side of the table.

"Kaidan, there is something I need to tell you. Don't speak right away, as I don't have a lot of time."

He cleared his throat and continued. "Kaidan, Jane is alive."

There it was, it was out. And now would come the lie.

"She was rescued from Ilos, she was badly wounded and near death, they were able to save her and with a lot of medical care she is up and able. The situation is that, she has lost most of her memories, she knows you though, and she thinks you're still engaged, she doesn't remember the fight. She doesn't remember Garrus."

Due to my asshole father, he thought but didn't say. He watched as Kaidan's face drained of colour, looking like he was about to pass out.

"Easy there, I know, I freaked out too. Things will make sense in time. I'm going to go back and get her, bring her aboard. Are you going to be okay?"

Kaidan shook his head staring at John in shock and dismay.

"I'm sorry Major, I thought you just said Jane is alive. That's not possible, I watched her die. I would have never left her if she was alive."

"Well it is Kaidan, she is alive. I realize this is short notice but I need you to pull yourself together. Get to the bridge I need to inform everyone else."

John spent the next fifteen minutes, trying to explain to a very shocked crew the situation at hand.

"Now please remember, she has very few memories, I think it would be best if everyone just didn't bring things up, unless she does. I realize it sounds insane, but try to act as if nothing has happened, that you're used to seeing her. Okay, dismissed continue with your duties."

~~00o00~~

As Jane was brought on board the Normandy, John stopped and reintroduced her to each person as they walked to the quarters that would be hers. As they passed the mess Kaidan and Liara were sitting at the table. Kaidans head was down, staring into his cup of coffee.

"Jane, this is Liara."

Jane nodded slightly. "Right, I remember you a little. Nice to see you." Her voice was unsure and she seemed embarrassed. Liara just smiled and nodded, moving on down the hall.

Kaidan still hadn't looked up, but when she called his name, his eyes snapped to hers.

"Kaidan, you I remember, very well. I've missed you, I'm sorry for everything I've put you through."

Kaidan stood and walked slowly to her, his hand reached out and brushed the hair back from her cheek.

"Dear, God you're real. I thought for sure the Major must have been insane, but here you are."

Jane smiled and took his hand. "Yeah, here I am."

John ground his teeth and felt the need to cuss loudly. Figures Alenko wouldn't think twice just as his father had said. As long as she wasn't mad at him, the fool was still head over heels for her. And now he had the bloody Alliance helping him out. Fuck this.

"Come on Jane, you can talk to Kaidan later. Let's get your stuff put away."

After getting her settled, John left Jane in her quarters and made his way to the bridge.

"Joker, we're headed to the Citadel, going to have a few new crew members."

"You mean besides the one we already have? Really that's Commander Shepards face alright, but something is off. I know she doesn't have a lot of memories but, there is something different in her eyes, and to be honest the whole thing creeps me out."

Shit Joker caught it right off the bat, this was going to be difficult, and he had to maintain this face until he could get them far enough away.

"Thank you for your concern Joker, its noted. Now set the course."

Kaidan had waited as long as he could, he had paced his room when he made up his mind to go see her.

Standing outside her room, Kaidan fidgeted before finally hitting the buzzer.

"Yeah, come in."

He'd never heard her call for entrance into her room like that. He shook it off and stepped inside. Jane was stretching against the wall and her face broke into a smile when she saw him.

"Hey, I was hoping you'd stop by."

"Really? I wasn't sure if you'd want to see me this soon or." He trailed off as she walked to him and gave him a hug.

"They said you might blame yourself for what happened. Don't, I had given you an order and you followed it. You did what you needed to do. And well here I am."

"Yeah, here you are." He wrapped his arms around her, returning the hug, her body melting into his, she lifted her eyes to his and not thinking he leaned down and kissed her soundly. She didn't pull back, but instead returned his kiss. Pulling away briefly smiling up at him and ask in a halting voice.

"I didn't know if you'd still feel the same, it's been so long."

"You really aren't mad at me Jane, baby?"

She shook her head, and didn't yell at the old pet name.

"No, of course not, I'm just glad to see you. My father told me that you've had a hard time. I'm sorry to have done that to you."

"Your father?" Kaidan asked not really hearing his own question.

"Yeah, Admiral Hackett, he brought me up to speed on everyone."

He noted that she had never called the Admiral that, but let it go again, as just having her arms around him was driving him mad, and he leaned down kissing her again, letting himself fall into her, and to his shock and pleasure she let him.

~~00o00~~

The Citadel was a buzz when they stepped off the Normandy; and John took Jane to see Captain Anderson, before they ran into anyone they knew.

Even though the Admiral had briefed him on the situation, he still damn near fell of the chair behind his desk, as Jane walked through the door, they spoke a little before Jane left smiling, back to the other room, to wait with Kaidan.

"I still can't believe it." Anderson repeated.

"I know Sir; we've all been a little off, since finding out."

"Understood Major, now as for the crew you're to pick up. They aren't here yet, I suggest you take your crew, let them stretch their legs, you guys are for in a rough haul."

"Aye Sir, I'm concerned though about some of these, people we're supposed to take on the Normandy. Assassins, thieves and bounty hunters? Are we really supposed to take these types of people with us?"

"I know what you must be thinking. But I'm sure the Admiral has his reasons."

"Yeah you have way more faith than I do." John muttered.

"I'm sorry Major, what was that?"

"Nothing, we'll be back."

John entered the room where Kaidan and Jane were waiting, and his eyes immediately dropped to where they were holding hands. He frowned and sucked in a deep breath, trying to calm himself before moving forward towards the elevator.

"Come on, let's get something to eat."

~~00o00~~

Garrus was bored; he hated C-Sec and all their damned red tape. He was out walking, trying to do something, anything but think about what could have been, what direction his life could have taken when he heard her laugh. He dragged a hand over his face and leaned forward over the railing, overlooking the Presidium. He was still hearing her damn it. Two years, and her voice was still in his head.

He turned and his heart stopped, as his eyes landed on a bright red-head of hair, and impossibly green clear eyes. She barely glanced at him and turned back to the others at the table, Kaidan and John.

Garrus blinked, trying to make the vision disappear. But every time he opened them, there she was.

John looked to his left, and spotted Garrus at the same time he saw Jane. Shit!

He was out of his chair so fast, that he knocked it over with a clatter, rushing his way to where Garrus stood gawking.

"Garrus, Garrus, look at me." Garrus ripped his eyes from Jane, and stared at John in shock.

"Okay, don't move, let me explain."

Finding his voice Garrus sputtered.

"How is this possible? Is that another sister? What the hell were they triplets?"

"No Garrus, that's Jane, she was rescued on Ilos shortly after she was wounded. They rescued her, saved her."

There John thought, the lie was out, quickly like ripping off a band-aid when you were a kid.

Garrus was silent as he stared back towards where Jane was laughing and eating with Kaidan. He swallowed hard before being able to speak again.

"How is that possible John? Kaidan said she was dead, no pulse. If I would have known, spirits I should have gone to check. I just left her there; I need to talk to her." Garrus moved forward and John caught his arm. He hated lying to Garrus, he liked him. He knew that Garrus cared for Jane, maybe even loved her, and his next words caught in his chest.

"Garrus, she's lost most of her memories. She, she, shit Garrus, she doesn't remember you."

Garrus turned his head slowly back to John and stared down at him, sadness and pain drifted over his face as his mandibles went slack.

"How much does she remember?"

John clenched his jaw against what he wanted to say, about how she only remembered the lies Hackett had told her.

"Not much, bits and pieces, most of her childhood is gone, as well as her time right before Ilos. She has very few memories."

"She doesn't remember her dad?" The last word came out as a choked whisper, and John shook his head.

"No, I'm afraid not. Like I said, she doesn't remember much, they said her memories would slowly come back, but for now not to push her."

Another lie, and it cut him just as a knife would.

"I see she remembers Kaidan alright." Garrus watched as Kaidan's arm went around her, John noticed Garrus visibly flinch, as he watched them.

"I'm sorry Garrus."

Garrus didn't answer him right away, his eyes widened after a moment and he lurched forward.

"Shit, we've got bigger problems John."

Johns followed Garrus's gaze, to where Ganis had spotted Jane from across the crowded terrace.

"You failed to mention Ganis was fucking here."

"Yeah well I was a little preoccupied with people coming back from the dead, wasn't I?"

They were both running forward trying to get to Ganis, but as they reached the table it was too late.

"Red? Sweetheart? This isn't possible, Kaidan? How? What I don't understand."

Ganis was on his knees next to Jane trying to pull her into his arms, but she pushed back resisting him.

Kaidan moved next to Ganis trying to pull him to his feet, but he wouldn't budge.

"Red, sweetheart? That is you, isn't it? How is this possible?"

Garrus was at his side, Jane was still trying to move away from him, and his heart shattered at the look on Ganis's face.

John stood dumbfounded, he had no fucking clue what to say.

"Ganis, I should have messaged you."

Ganis's eyes turned to his, confusion etched his face.

"We need to talk Ganis, but not here." John motioned to the side and they walked away with Garrus practically having to drag Ganis along, his eyes never leaving Jane.

"I should have messaged you Ganis, I didn't realize you were on the Citadel, though I guess I should have messaged you too Garrus. But honestly this was just dropped on me as well. They've had her for two years, she's been in rehab, and Ganis, I know this is going to be awful, but she doesn't remember you, she doesn't remember Nihlus or Garrus. Her memory comes in clips, they don't know when or." He stopped swallowing, hating the next lie. "Or if she will remember."

Ganis spun to him ripping his eyes away from the table.

"If you just let me talk to her, she'll remember. She has to, my little girl is alive and she doesn't know me, pushes me away. Just let me have some time with her."

John bit down on his lip until he tasted blood.

"I'm sorry Ganis, I can't. They told me to let her come back on her own. I can't." John lowered his voice and leaned towards them.

"As soon as I can though, I'll fix this sir, I swear to you."

Ganis gave a deep growl in his chest and made to turn to do it anyways, but Garrus stopped him, pulling him to the side. He spoke to him briefly, there was a lot of cuss words his translator didn't pick up and waving of hands, until finally with one last look at the table, Ganis stalked off the way he had come.

Garrus, his mandibles pulled flush to his face turned back to John.

"You listen to me John, I have no idea what is really going on here, but I know you're not telling me everything."

John licked his lips, which were bloody and suddenly very dry.

"I'm sorry Garrus, we're headed out on a mission and, I didn't have time to let anyone know."

The lies were adding up faster than he could keep up.

Garrus narrowed his eyes at him.

"You're going to do something for me John, you're going to get me on the Normandy, I don't care what you have to do to get me there, but you will. It was the only way I could get Ganis to not march over there and do just as you told him not to. Though I wanted to let him, I trust you John."

John sucked in a deep breath at that, feeling his stomach knot, before he realized it he was nodding.

"Good, I'll see you at the docks."

With that, Garrus stared towards Jane until she looked up and met his eyes. He tried to put everything into that one glance, every feeling that he felt at seeing her, but she just quirked her head to the side, no recognition in her eyes for him and he sighed, fighting the urge to break things as he walked away to quit C-Sec and figure out what the hell had just happened.

Jane watched the grey Turian talking with John watch her, she didn't know him, at least she didn't think so, but he and that other Turian sure seemed to know her. Shit she wished she could remember.

As she watched him walk away she felt a pulling, almost like she wanted to follow him. The way he had looked at her had been so familiar, but she just couldn't remember. Like a dream that wakes you in a cold sweat, and the more you think about it the more it drifts away, like water through your hand.

One thing she knew for sure though, she wanted to know who he was, and why he looked at her like she was the only person on the Citadel.

~~00o00~~

Let the mass chaos ensue. I realize this has been really hard to read for a while. Bear with me, we're all about to get what we really want.

I hope you all had a great weekend.

^.^