AH! Here is a REALLY long chapter! Just warning you all! Also, a fact is that the title of this chapter 'Say Nothing' was inspired by the song 'Say Something' by Auston Mahone! (Dont know if i spelled that right!)
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I made my way through the swarm of people surrounding the Prima Donna room. I bore a fake smile for the crowd as I walked. Sure it was great to have all of these people aloud for me and only me, but William's words were still lingering around in my mind.
"Ejemmaline!" I sighed as Monsieur Andre and Monsieur Firmon beckoned me to them.
I headed towards the two men, still wearing a façade of a smile. "Yes?" I asked sweetly.
"You gave a superb performance tonight!" Andre gushed.
"Why thank you!" I curtsied towards Andre, then Firmin, who simply smiled and nodded.
"You were sublime!" Firmin spoke. He seemed less hyper than his friend.
"Indeed." Andre agreed. "The phantom must have liked your performance too because he didn't try and ruin it!" I ignored his comment about Erik.
The smile which Monsieur Firmin had faded a bit. "Now, we shall just have to cross our fingers and pray to God that the critics agree with us! Remember, it is their word that could cause your career to crash and burn."
Andre nodded, as did I.
"I understand completely. All that matters to me is that I had a great time tonight." I spoke in all seriousness yet lied through my teeth at the same time.
"That is exactly the spirit and kind of attitude that will charm the people!" Andre patted my arm and walked off.
"Keep your head up Jemma." Firmin said with a sincere smile. He then followed after his idiotic friend.
I smiled to myself and continued to the dressing room. I was kind of glad that the younger looking manager had used my nickname instead of my real name. I was also grateful that he had been so straight forward with me. It is always good to know that there are still some honest people in this business.
I opened the door and walked into the pink room. Luckily, since most of the crowd was clearing out to the foyer to celebrate the success of tonight's opera, I didn't have to push by thousands of people to get to my destination. I remember when I was just a ballet girl and I would always enjoy the parties. I didn't really hang out with many people, but the music alone was enough to make my night and bring a smile to my face. Most of the stars however would enjoy a nice and quiet night with their lover or a friend.
I shut the door behind me and looked around. I couldn't help but gag a little bit at the sight. Pink in every direction! Pink roses, pink walls, pink rugs, and even giant pictures of La Carlotta framed in pink! Gross!
I shook my head shamefully at how girly some people can be. I am more of a dark girl. I prefer dark colors. And blue. Any shade of blue should suffice for me!
Tearing my feet from the spot I was standing, I walked over to the vanity table, the only decent looking thing in this whole room. I pulled out the chair and took a seat so that I may take off my ballet shoes with ease. I bent over and began to unlace my left ballet shoe. I gingerly pulled the string and the shoe listened on my foot so that I may take it off. I gave one good tug and it came off.
"My gosh!" I breathed a sigh of relief and wiggled my toes. I suddenly felt a pang of pity for Carlotta, the usual leading lady, and Christine when she got a chance to be the lead. Being the leading lady meant wearing your ballet slippers skin tight which is painful. I wonder if Carlotta ever got used to the shoes.
I took off my other shoe and sighed again. I massaged my feet as they were very sore. By tomorrow I would have blisters. My toes hurt the most because of the wooden toe box that I have to balance on while dancing.
I sat straight up and placed both of my feet on the soft carpet and pivoted in my seat to look in the mirror. Then I saw it, a rose.
On the desk was a white rose. I knew in my heart that it had to be from Erik considering he was the only one that could come in here unnoticed. I smiled and reached out to pick up the beautiful rose.
Noticing that it had thorns made my smile fade. The last rose that I had received hadn't had a single thorn. Erik had clearly said that a rose with no thorns meant that the rose giver loved you at first sight. I guess that Erik didn't love me, where as I thought I might have started to develop feelings for him. I figured that the last rose didn't have thorns because he was thinking of Christine when he was getting it. He loved her with out a doubt at first sight. I wasn't even his second best.
I sighed and forlornly twirled the rose in between my fingers.
"Jemma!" My door burst open and I could have sworn that I had a heart attack. I lost grip on the rose and it pricked me. "Ow!" I said as I dropped it to the table.
"Didn't mean to scare you boo." I looked over at Meg and knitted my eyebrows together. No matter how much I wished to laugh at her, I knew that I couldn't. She had ignored me for almost two weeks! I sucked on my thumb to stop the bleeding as I heard the door slowly shut close.
"You alright?" Meg asked. I glared over at her again.
"Fine." I said with no emotion what so ever.
"Jemma…" Meg coed. " I know that we need to talk, but can you at least say something more than 'fine'?"
I shook my hand to rid of my excess saliva. I spun in my seat to look at her and then, I flipped. "What do you want me to say?" I threw my hands up in the air. "For almost a month, you have ditched me! I disappear for a day or two and when I get back, you still ignore me! What do you expect me to say?"
Meg looked down at her feet. "Well-"
I cut her off. "And better yet, Christine ditches me as well and I am all alone! I had no one to turn to when I was worried about the show! Do you not get that you, my one and only cousin, hurt me?" I yelled. I was almost positive that I heard a whimper.
"I'm sorry Jemma! I really am!" Meg looked back up and I saw the look of pain written all over her frail face.
"Then why? Why did you two just leave me?" I stood up at the table.
"Raoul made me!" Meg blurted out. She then let out a sigh. I thought she was going to cry any second, but instead she took a few deep breathes and calmed down. She gets flustered really easily. "He made us both." Meg looked up at me, eyes full of guilt.
"What do you mean Meg?" I stood up and walked over to her.
Meg spun her foot around. "He told Christine that she shouldn't talk to you." Meg looked down again, but I just kept looking at her.
"And why is that?"
"Raoul told Christine that you were holding her back, that you were getting in the way of her spotlight." I heard meg swallow a gulp as she looked back up at me.
"I never did like Raoul." I gave a half hearted smile to my cousin and friend. "What did he say to you Meg?"
"He um…he told me that I shouldn't talk to you because…" Meg shook her head and let a tear fall down her face.
"Its alright Meg. You can tell me." I said sweetly.
"Raoul told me that I shouldn't talk to you because you are a mental case!" Meg burst out in tears and held her head in her hands. I pulled her close and wrapped her into a hug.
"Why does he believe that I am a mental case Meg?" I asked in all seriousness.
Meg lifted her head and stepped out of my hug. "Jemma, the whole Opera house thinks that you are insane." With that said, my heart dropped from my chest to my stomach in a matter of milliseconds.
"R-really?"
"Yes Jemma. You kept on disappearing and people started to believe…things." Meg bit her lip.
"What kind of 'things'?"
"Well, many rumors spread." Meg twirled a strand of her dirty blonde hair around her finger. "Some people thought that you were gone because you had killed someone and you needed time to rid of the body."
I looked down. "What else?"
"Many believe that you were kidnapped by the Phantom, and that started many other rumors. The men of the Opera House told everyone that the Phantom took you because he had…needs, and you were the easiest person to get with."
I froze at that one and thought back to the time when I was with Erik. We did not even come close to bedding. The closest we got was when we were drinking the white wine, but even that had to end.
"Do you have anything to drink Erik? I do not mean to be a bother, it is just that my throat is very dry."
"Oh um, let me go see." Erik stood up and I watched as he walked away. I quickly fixed my hair as he came out and stood behind me.
"Is this alright? It is all I have." Erik said, holding up two fancy glasses and a bottle of wine. I nodded my head as he sat down next to me.
Erik popped the cork off of the wine bottle and poured us each a full glass. He handed me one of the cups as he set the wine next to him on the ground. "Thank you." I said. Erik and I both took a sip of the wine. It tasted really good. Sweet with a hint of bitterness.
It seemed as though Erik drank a lot so I wasn't going to tell him that this was my first drink of alcohol. I would seem stupid. I am only 19, but most girls in the Opera House that are about 16 score some drinks at parties and celebrations. I however, would stay sober so that I could dance the next day. But I was with Erik and I didn't plan on dancing any time with in the next few hours. Plus, I really was parched.
I brought the cup down and noticed that Erik's eyes were on me. He just kept staring at me. "What?" He didn't answer. Instead, he just kept staring at me. "What?" I asked again, a little agitated, yet in the funny kind of way if that makes any sense.
Erik lifted a finger and wiped my top lip. To be honest, I was a little confused, but my confusion was overcome by an even greater feeling. I believe that feeling is called love. Even though he had his glove on, I could feel the sparks.
Erik let his finger linger on my lip a bit longer than needed, but I didn't mind. I was to high on cloud 9. I wasn't sure if the sparks I felt were mutual, but they were there.
When Erik pulled his arm back, I almost wished that he hadn't. I enjoyed him being so close to me. "You had some wine on your lip."
I nodded, in a staring contest with Erik's beautiful blue eyes. "Thanks." I said in a small voice. I felt a smile creep onto my face as I saw the edges of Erik's mouth begin to form a smile. His smile made me smile.
I felt as if time had frozen around me. I wanted Erik to kiss me or do something to break the silence. Something to show me that my feelings towards him were shared. When he did nothing, I let my smile fade as I spoke up. "I um…I should probably get back to sleep." I stood up, leaving Erik still sitting on the bench.
"Yes you should." I looked down at him and saw that his smile had vanished as well. Did I ruin the moment?
"Thank you for the drink Erik." I said as I looked down to the ground, noticing my half empty wine glass.
"Your welcome." Erik said as he nodded. I nodded back and walked back to the Louis-Philippe room holding Erik's cape still.
That was that. "What do you believe Meg?" I asked in a hushed voice.
"I believe that Raoul is the mental case and that if you killed someone you would tell me!" Meg joked. I couldn't help but laugh, which snapped me out of my thoughts.
"Don't worry, if I ever decide to free the world of Carlotta, you will be the first to know!" I laughed again and hugged Meg.
"Do you want me to talk to Christine for you?" Meg asked me as we backed out of the hug.
"Yes. Just tell her that I would never try of outshining her, and that we just happen to have the same goal in life." I shrugged.
"Alright. Now, I must run before mother starts to question my whereabouts!" We giggled once again as Meg opened the door. "Love you Jem!" She yelled as she ran out of the dressing room. I sighed a contempt sigh. I was glad that I had made up with my favorite cousin and hopefully Christine.
I skipped over to the wall mirror that I knew Erik lived behind. We were so close yet so far all of this time. I shook Erik out of my head and took off my skirt. I tossed it onto the pink sofa, now standing in a white corset and beige tights that luckily weren't see through, and beige underwear.
I heard the door slowly creak open and quickly shut. I figured that it was Meg so I continued to undress. I bent over and slid a finger in one of my stockings. I slowly slid it down to my foot and then gingerly took it off.
"Again please?" A cocky voice said. With only a corset on, underwear and now just one stocking.
"William!" I fleetly grabbed a frilly white robe provided for me. I turned away from William and pulled it on, tying it up in the front as fast as I could before turning back to face the man.
"Have you ever heard of knocking?" I asked as I placed my hands on my hips.
"Sorry Jemma. I just wanted to swing by and tell you that there is a carriage waiting out front for us." William held out a purple violet and held it out to me. I walked over to him and took it carefully, setting it on my desk next to the flower from Erik.
I sighed and turned back to William. "listen William, I told you this before and I will tell you again in the nicest way possible, I don't want to go out tonight. I would rather just hang out here for the night, maybe read a good book and then go to sleep."
William looked a bit mad. "I already paid for the carriage, so the very least you could do is take a leisurely ride in the park with me." He fixed his eyes on mine.
"That sounds very nice, but I really don't feel like leaving the opera house tonight. I'm sorry." I did feel bad that I was turning him down, but he hadn't made a good first impression on me.
"Alright Jemma, have it your way. We don't have to leave the Opera House." I smiled at him and walked back over to the large two way mirror and began to fix my hair. "We just have to be quieter."
I turned around and looked at William with confused eyes as he stormed over to me. He took me by my upper arms and slammed my back against the mirror.
"Let me go!" I shouted.
William took his right hand off of me, but before I could try and escape, he gripped my throat tightly with his now free hand.
"I told you to be quiet beautiful." William smirked at me and then winked. He still had his hand around my throat, but he loosened it so that I could breath. I think he left his hand on my throat as a threat.
William let go of my arm and slid his hand down the side of my body to my hip. "You truly are a beautiful woman Jemma." He hissed in my ear. I shook in his grip as his hand traveled lower than my hip.
"Please William, let me go." I begged. Tears glazed over my eyes.
William lifted his head to look at me. Then, right there at that moment, I saw something. Something in him changed. He took his hands off of me and took a step back. "I can't." He said, shaking his head.
I rubbed my arms and throat lightly and walked to my vanity desk. I picked up the white rose that Erik gave me and held it to my chest as I let tears spill out of my eyes.
"And don't you ever tell anyone what happened or you will regret it!" William shouted. I turned my head to look at him and SMACK! The sound of William's hand colliding with my cheek rang through out the room. I fell to the ground and dropped my rose. I looked up to see William heading for the door. With out another word, he left
I sat on the ground for about one minute before picking up the rose and standing up. I couldn't tell anyone what had happened so I decided it best to just walk out. I held the rose to my chest and opened the door. I shut it behind me and made my way to my room.
I walked up the many steps, still with only one stocking on. Once I got to my room, I wiped away my tears and plastered a fake smile. I opened the door and saw Christine sitting on her bed talking to Meg.
"Hi Jemma!" Meg said. She jumped up and ran over to me, embracing me in a tight hug.
"Hi." I said in a low voice. I could tell that both Meg and Christine were staring at the handprint on my cheek, but I was glad that they dint say anything.
"What's wrong Boo?" Not even that made me smile.
"Nothing. I'm just sleepy." I lied.
Meg nodded her head and led me to my bed. I took a seat and Christine looked from me to Meg. "Meg dear, I hate to do this, but could you please leave? Jemma and I need to talk."
Meg smiled and nodded her head. "Goodnight Jemma! You did great tonight!" And with that, Meg skipped out of mine and Christine's room.
I looked over at Christine, my face holding no emotion.
It was silent for about 5 minutes before Christine broke the ice. "I'm sorry for ditching you. I didn't mean to, but Raoul said that you were holding me back and that I shouldn't talk to you anymore."
"Why did you listen to him?" I looked down.
"Because I was stupid and because I love him. When you love someone, you will do anything for them, but this time, I shouldn't have listened to him." I nodded my head.
Many thoughts ran through my head. Like the fact that Christine and Raoul love each other. Erik wouldn't like that. "Oh." I said plainly.
"I'm sorry Jemma, I really am. don't ever think that you are holding me back or anything. Also, don't listen to the rumors. I know that you don't sleep around and that the Phantom didn't have his way with you. Never listen to the people." Great, another rumor. Apparently I sleep around now. I love rumors. I get to learn things about myself that I didn't even know.
"All is forgiven. Now, when did these rumors start?" I still stared at the ground.
"They started while you were with MY angel. I just didn't want to upset you with them before the show." The way she said 'MY angel', kind of made her sound mad at me for spending time with Erik.
"Oh well. The rumors will die down soon." I just wanted this conversation to end so I could go to sleep and forget about the night for a while.
"Indeed." Christine paused. "Are you alright? You seem as if your mind is somewhere else." She always notices everything.
"Yes, I am fine. I am just tired and I think I am going to go to sleep now." I laid down, still in the robe. I wasn't in the mood to change into my sleepwear. I pulled the blanket over my body and Christine blew out the candle.
"Alright." Christine sighed. I think she knew that something was off about me. "I am going to go to the party with Meg and Raoul. I will see you in the morning."
I could hear Christine stand and walk to the door. She opened it and let light crawl into the room. "By the way Jemma, you did an amazing job performing in Faust tonight. You were meant to play the role." I smiled, but since I had rolled onto my side to face the wall, Christine couldn't see.
"Thank you." She shut the door and I knew I was all alone. I was alone. Then and now. Not even Erik came to help me. Instead I nearly got raped by William. I was to upset to even cry. All I could do was think about the past events that would forever change me.
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Alright, so I REALLY want you guys to answer THESE questions please! 1- If you were Meg, would you have gone against Raoul's word and still talked to Jemma? 2- What was going through your head as you read this? 3- What is different between this performance with Jemma, and the performance with Christine? 4- What do you WANT to happen next in the book?