Side-note: In case any of you out there don't know, a 'nakama' is someone that's very, very special. Like friend, and family, only more, but not romantical. Someone you'd give your life for, and more, basically, whether blood-related or not. It's a term that Natsu, and all of Fairy Tail, use often when referring to each other.

This chapter is still building up to the more intense stuff, I want to make the story at least somewhat realistic.

Lucy wandered for hours, and it wasn't until after midnight that her tired feet finally brought her up to the door of her apartment. Her hand reached for the doorknob, and she'd been just about to turn the handle when she'd heard muffled voices inside.

Knowing her team mates were in there, Lucy gulped and pulled her hand from the doorknob quickly. She took a step back, walking away from her apartment.

She couldn't face them.

Not now.

Not with her puffy, red eyes, or with her aching, tight chest, or the fake smile she was sure she'd have to paint onto her face from now on.

So she walked away from the apartment, down the road, and plopped down in front of the river.

And just sat there, thinking.

She wasn't going to cry again, she told herself, she had cried enough.

Instead, she stared blankly at the water.

Despite that, the tears overflowed anyway, she was helpless to them.

Seconds ticked by, which turned to minutes, and then hours.

And all she did was stare at the water, as tears ran silently down her cheeks.

Tears that sparkled in the moonlight.

Beautiful.

Tragic.

Just like her.

She didn't know how long it had been that she had sat there like that, but finally, she got up, dusted herself off, and headed for the nearest hotel.

Which brings us to where we are now.

"Here's ten-thousand jewels." Lucy said, knowing she would have to get a job now if she wanted to keep her apartment. The inn keeper smiled at her and directed her to one of the empty rooms there.

It wasn't too expensive an inn, thankfully, but was certainly a comfortable one.

Because she didn't have any clean clothes with her, she didn't bother taking a shower. Instead Lucy slipped under the covers and closed her eyes. Initially, she thought she wouldn't be able to sleep, but it didn't take long for unconsciousness to claim her.

It was dark.

She couldn't see anything.

She wandered, not knowing where she was going.

Feeling hopeless.

Lost.

Alone.

And then he was there.

Hope.

Light.

Happiness.

But he was walking away.

Away from her.

And there was nothing she could do to stop it.

But that didn't mean she wasn't going to try!

She wouldn't let him slip away that easily.

The cure to her hopelessness.

The light to guide her way.

The happiness to remedy her loneliness.

So Lucy ran.

She chased after him, stretching out her arm as far as she could, reaching for him, and calling his name.

Yet he didn't respond.

Didn't turn around.

Didn't give any signal that he had heard her.

He just kept walking.

Then, finally, Lucy seemed to be catching up.

But just as she was about to grab hold of his shoulder, another figure appeared.

Juvia.

Lucy stopped dead in her tracks and watched as the water woman leaned forward.

She knew what Juvia was going to do.

She was going to kiss Gray.

Lucy stared, horrified.

And then she lunged.

But it was too late.

There was something in her way.

Something invisible that stopped her.

She could only watch as their lips got closer.

Closer.

Almost touching.

And then…

Lucy jolted up, wide-eyed. She rubbed her eyes sleepily, and then frowned. Apparently she couldn't even escape in her dreams.

She stood up and stretched, then looked around for a clock, but didn't see one. With a shrug, she decided to go back to her apartment and shower. Lucy wanted to avoid it in case her teammates were still there, but she didn't have any clean clothes, and didn't have any money on her to buy new ones. Besides, she needed to save her money.

With a sigh, she grabbed her purse and walked out of the inn.

Oh well, at least I feel a little better today, she thought to herself.

Unbeknownst to her, it wouldn't last long.

Her apartment wasn't far, and she walked along the river on the way there, balancing just on the edge. The guys that always rode down it on a boat called to her to watch her step.

They always did.

It felt nice to be doing something familiar, peaceful. She could almost convince herself that nothing had changed. Almost.

After reaching her apartment, Lucy waited, but heard nothing inside. And indeed, when she turned the handle, she found it unlocked, but her apartment was unoccupied.

Letting go of a small sigh of relief that she hadn't realized she'd been holding in, she walked inside, grabbed some clean clothes, and headed straight for her bathroom.

On the way to her apartment, she had been able to distract herself, but once she was in the shower, her thoughts claimed her. Under the warm water that drenched her hair and cascaded over her skin, unwanted thoughts loomed over her. Thoughts she didn't want to face, but try as she might to ignore them, they still berated her.

What she most wanted to know was why, she thought to herself, lathering up her hair with soap. That was always the question in these types of situations. Why? Why had he said yes? Why had he agreed? Could it be possible that Gray really had feelings for Juvia? She shuddered, thinking of the day before.

It had been so sudden, and she had been so unprepared.

She knew she should feel happy for him. He was such a close friend, her nakama, and she wanted, so badly, for him to be more. She felt guilty for feeling the way she did, but she couldn't help it. It had hurt so much.

And Juvia, Lucy had never had that much of a problem with Juvia. Even through all of Juvia's false assumptions of Lucy and Gray. They had been false at first, at least, but as time wore on, Lucy had felt closer and closer to Gray. That had all changed yesterday. Lucy had only realized that she had feelings for him two months ago, but, she admitted to herself as she soaped up her body, she wasn't aware just how strong they were until reality had hit her in the face the previous day.

Juvia was her nakama though, too, right? She was a Fairy Tail member as much as Lucy was. So shouldn't Lucy feel happy for her, too? But she couldn't even bring herself to want to feel happy for Juvia. Sure, she felt a little guilty about it, but her emotions towards the obsessive water mage had darkened yesterday, and were only continuing to do so.

Obsession. That's what got to Lucy the most, Juvia only thought she was in love with Gray. In truth, she was simply obsessed. And that was what had annoyed Lucy the worst. All the times Juvia would exclaim, "Juvia loves Gray-sama!", it would grate on Lucy's nerves.

Love. There was so much more to love, Juvia didn't understand. Lucy loved Gray, Juvia didn't.

But if she loved him, why couldn't she be happy for him? The answer was simple: because Juvia didn't deserve him.

If it had been someone else, Mirajane, or even Erza, Lucy would still have been sad. She would still have cried, and her heart would still have been broken, but she wouldn't be feeling like this. Because, whether it was Mirajane, or Erza, they would have had genuine feelings for Gray. Not some stupid obsession, some 'love at first sight' nonsense.

The more Lucy thought about Juvia, the more she disliked her.

Juvia, always following Gray around, even going as far as to stalk him on missions. She thought she was being so sly, but Lucy had noticed many times, and who knew how many times she hadn't?

Juvia, always standing by and staring stupidly at Gray with those big, infatuated eyes of hers. The more Lucy thought of them, the more feral they seemed, like a hungry animal's ready to pounce on her prey. Disgusting.

Juvia, always exclaiming how she 'loved' Gray. Lies. Lucy loved him, Juvia didn't know the meaning of love.

Obsessive. Annoying. Presumptuous. Clingy.

These words were what came to mind when Lucy thought about Juvia. Most of these thoughts weren't new, Lucy had had them fleetingly in the past, but she hadn't wanted to think badly of her 'nakama', so she had pushed them to the back of her mind. Now, though, they bubbled over as she brooded on them.

Vaguely, she realized that all the shampoo was out of her hair now, and the soap was off her skin. With that same burning, painful feeling in her chest, she reached over and turned off the water.

The feeling hadn't gotten any better, she had just gotten a little bit more used to it.

Maybe she could face her teammates after all.

Maybe she could face him after all.

But not yet, she needed time, which meant that she was going to avoid going to the guild today. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe for a few days.

She was going to avoid him.

After drying herself off, she put on her black miniskirt and pink tube top, then stepped out of the bathroom. The sight before her caused her to wince visibly, but she collected herself quickly, doing her best to ignore the pain that shot through her heart and instead looked questioningly at the person in front of her.

The person she least wanted to see right now.

Gray.

"Hey Lucy."

So much for avoiding.

I decided I'm going to try to update this on Wednesdays and Saturdays. If you find any typos, please let me know. I'd also like a beta, so if any of you are willing, I'd be very appreciative!

Thank you so much for reading my story, I know it's a little slow right now, but it WILL get better. Just wait until chapter five...that was a fun one to write.

Ahem, anyway, reviews are GREATLY appreciated. Now I understand what all the authors talk about how happy they are to get reviews, it's really, really exciting, and very encouraging.

Thanks again, PM me if you have anything you'd like to ask/suggest/say.