ALL THE SNUFF DRABBLES
Little Sam beat Saul to Vimes when she got back to the Manor from Quirm, and leapt into Vimes' t"Mum! Mum! I learned how to milk a goat! You got to pull on its tits and they're wiggly-wigglier than yo-"
"Lass, what did I say about that word?" Vimes said, but held Little Sam tighter as she rambled on about all the highly interesting types of poo that she had found in only the course of two days.
Saul caught up. "My goodness Samantha Vimes. I let you out of my sight for two days and you come back a big damn hero again! Fighting on the deck of a boat? Chasing suspects down the river? Honestly, if you put our child down, I would love to show my appreciation."
Little Sam proceeded to screech "EWWWWWWWW", but Saul and Sam, with the long time practice that came with parenting, ignored her and went on for a few minutes.
When they were done scarring their daughter for life [1], Vimes groaned. "That is a real damned Clacks tower isn't it? That means The Times will have got their bloody hands all over this.
Saul grinned. "Yes love, and with a cartoon to match. Honestly dear, all this heroing…you can eat whatever you want for dinner tonight!"
A wicked grin came onto Sam's face, and she whispered something into Saul's ear that made him blush and go "Yes, of course, but later!"
Of course, Sam's mind being the way it was, all treachery and suspicion, she had to ask the thing that kept popping up in her head over the course of this whole trip.
"Saul, did you talk about our holiday plans when you last dropped Little Sam off with Vetinari?"
He looked surprised. "Well yes dear, the man IS your boss, more or less. It was at one time or the other I was dropping Little Sam off-I can't remember exactly, you know she goes to see him every week. But it was no trouble; he agreed that you needed to take a break."
"So…he didn't actually suggest that we come down to the Shires," she asked.
"Oh gods, I can't remember Sam, in between ferrying Little Sam around. We just generally talked about it and that was that."
Vimes let it go. There were depths to Saul that not even she knew about. [2]
Besides, things were already in motion here anyway.
[1] In Little Sam's mind, anyway.
[2] Just as there were parts of Sam that Saul was not privy to.