Hey guys, let me tell you a story. A long time ago (like, more than a year), I started a fictionpress account. However, I've done jack shit with it. I am pleased to say that I decided to actually write something and put it up there; check out my fictionpress account under the same username, and tell me what you think of my dumb story!
And now, back to our heroic shenanigans.
THE GREAT BEACH FIASCO OF 2012 - PART 3
The squid roared loudly, thrashing its tentacles around, much to the dismay of his hostages. "I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL KILL YOU AAAAAALLLLL!" The volleyball players snapped out of their shock to respond to the situation; meanwhile, all the sane people (and Snake) were still glaring at Lucario, who was still looking at his feet in shame. Goddamn people, you've been doing this for like, since Christmas Eve. Can't you all drop your grudges already; especially you, Mr. Angry Giant Killer Squid.
"Hyper, real-life time and fanfic time are completely separate from each other." Meta Knight explained.
Yeah, yeah, so you keep telling me. But seriously, stop being angry at Lucario.
"HE'S RIGHT. WE HAVE TO PUT ASIDE OUR ANGER TO RESCUE THE OTHER SMASHERS." the Ancient Minister agreed.
"Can't those guys handle it?" Falco said, referring to the volleyball players declaring war on the giant squid; before they could get close to the guy, the gigantic sea creature smacked them away with a tentacle.
"Apparently not." commented King Dedede as he watched them fly into a hill of sand. They'll never get the sand out of their shorts.
"Everyone I was playing volleyball with excel at hand-to-hand combat; seeing as they can't get near the squid before getting repelled, they're mainly useless in this situation." Meta Knight stated.
"Well, I have a few rockets in my disposal, as I felt that something like this would happen." Snake said. No one chose to doubt why he would do such a thing. "However, I don't think it'll be enough..."
"I could keep throwing Waddle Dees at the guy until I finally throw a Gordo." suggested the penguin king. The Ancient Minister stared down at him.
"WHY DON'T YOU JUST THROW THE GORDOS?"
"Blame my voice actor."
"Well, we need some way to get the people on the ground to help attack it." said Meta Knight.
"I'll distract it." Everyone froze in awe as they watched Lucario courageously step forward. "I caused this mess, so I need to help fix it."
"I'LL HELP YOU OUT THEN." The Ancient Minister produced both a built in laser gun and the revolver he used to shoot people's kneecaps during the Kid Icarus: Uprising/black market shenanigans. Lucario matched him in sheer backass-ery by forming aura between his fingers, which crinkled with the blue energy. King Dedede threw Waddles Dees, Waddle Doos, and Gordos into the air and started to juggle them. Clearly, these guys were a force to be reckoned with.
"...Will you guys stop posing and start fighting that monster?" Snake snapped. With their priorities set straight, the trio started to head toward the shore. Meta Knight got into the air and flew after them; this left Falco alone with Snake. "And you..."
"Yeah?"
"...want to help me launch rockets into that squid's face?"
Falco grinned. "Hell. Yes."
"Can't... get... free..." Ganondorf grunted as he tried to squirm out of the squid's grasp.
"Game and Watch! Can't you communicate with it? You're like, part squid, right?" Toon Link yelled.
"I AM NOT PART SQUID!" The 2D man shouted back.
"Can you people save us already!" Ness shouted.
"Hey, we're trying kid!" Ike yelled, after his and the others' fourth rescue attempt; if the squid had more tentacles, he would have grabbed them a long time ago. Then, the squid suddenly flinched, something having hit it. "...We didn't do that."
"Who dares lay a hit on me?" the squid questions in a booming voice. He looked up and saw Meta Knight buzzing around him like a fly. "Annoying pest!" He hurled Toon Link into Meta Knight, knocking him out of the sky and making them fall.
"Why do bad things keep happening to meeeeee..." Toon Link screamed as he hit the ground. Meta Knight however recovered, spread out his wings again, and continued his assault on the squid. The beast roared and decided to refocus his efforts on him and the volleyball players; before he could start smashing the hell out of them, he got blasted by something at his side. The squid turned his head and saw the Ancient Minister flying around, ray gun and revolver in tow.
"LET GO OF MY SMASHERS!" He shouted as he continued to shoot away.
"What. This is just absurd!" The squid was getting burned by all the shots, but he managed to stand up to them. Then, he felt something bump him from behind. "What now." He turned and saw King Dedede wearing a floatie, tossing Waddle Dees at him, who proceeded to drown immediately after crashing into him.
"Take... this!" Dedede shouted as he continued to toss the cannon fodder at him.
"Are you serious? ARE YOU ALL ON RETARD PILLS OR SOMETHING?" the squid screamed.
"Hey, I'm among the sanest Smashers, so excuse you! Just... wait..." Then King Dedede threw his ace in the hole; a Gordo flew out of his hands and stuck onto the squid.
"AAAAAARGH!"
"There we go!"
"YOU... YOU'RE ALL GOING TO PAY FOR THIS!" the aquatic beast propelled himself out of the water and landed back down with a crash, creating a tidal wave that washed away everyone but Meta Knight and the Ancient Minister; before he went back to terrorizing them, guess what happened?
"Take this!" A voice shouted as something hit the monster.
"YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. WHO IS IT THIS TIME?" the squid wondered, seeing as he was already fighting a group of volleyball players, a flying swordsman, a robot, and a penguin that threw living things from hammerspace. At the shore, he saw Lucario, and he immediately recognized the blue energy forming within his hands. "YOU! IT WAS YOU WHO ATTACKED ME! I WILL GUT YOU LIKE THE FISH I EAAAAAAT!" In a moment of blind rage, he completely focused his rage on Lucario, trying to smash him with his appendages; he ignored everyone else, which allowed them to attack.
"He's open! KICK HIS ASS!" Captain Falcon screamed. All of the hand-to-hand fighters, now presented with the opportunity to do some damage, ran into the water screaming bloody murder and started hacking away at the squid; the squid started screaming, and looked panicked. His eyes kept shifting its gaze; he was not sure who he should be attacking.
And then something flew into his forehead and exploded, injuring him quite a bit. "ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS?" Then another projectile hit him and exploded, much to his dismay.
Back at the beach house, Snake's rocket launcher was set up on a stand (like a tripod camera or something), with Snake and Falco standing behind it, laughing to each other.
"Nice hit!" Snake complimented.
"Alright, it's your turn to shoot!" Falco said. Snake nodded, played around with the launcher, and fired yet another rocket at the squid.
At this point, the squid was being attacked by: a skilled bat-winged swordsman, an angry group of people attacking him with their fists or swords, a hovering robot that was shooting him with lasers and bullets, a penguin who was throwing Waddle Dees, Waddle Doos, and (most painful of all) Gordos, a Pokemon who threw hard-hitting balls of aura, and two people screwing around with a rocket launcher; it clearly wasn't his day. As the barrage continued, he started to lose his grip on some of the Smashers he held captive and they joined along in the attack. This was about the point where the squid realized that this whole thing was dumb and that he would probably die if he continued trying to attack him.
"You know what, this isn't fair anymore! TAKE YOUR FRIENDS! YOU ALL SUCK!" the squid threw all the Smashers he held toward the beach house; their weight and speed of impact completely demolished the place, while Snake and Falco stood watching it happen. The squid then turned and started to dive back into the sea; before his massive figure was hidden by the waves, he rose a tentacle out of the sea and pointed at all of them accusingly. "I'LL GET MY REVENGE ONE DAY! NOW PISS OFF!" And so the tentacle dove back in, along with its owner.
"We're-a alive!" Luigi, aka, the first victim, cheered; the other Smashers roared in victory. Falco ran down to the beach to join up with Lucario, and Meta Knight and King Dedede headed back down as well.
"I'm glad everyone's okay; hopefully, we won't be seeing that squid ever again." said Meta Knight.
"Yeah, I hope not." Falco then turned to look at Lucario. "This wouldn't have happened if it weren't for you, you know." Suddenly, the commotion on the beach stopped as every Smasher glared at Lucario.
"Hold on, this is actually your fault?" Bowser asked; some of the other Smashers were just as baffled, as they never expected that any of this was Lucario's fault.
"I was just playing a game and... just be happy that you're alive." Lucario said, while secretly wishing that they don't go postal on him. To his satisfaction, the Smashers shrugged and went back to celebrating, letting bygones be bygones.
"Wait!" a voice said from a sand dune; Toon Link's head popped out of it. "The beach house is destroyed! What are we going to do about it?"
"We could just crash in the Halber-" King Dedede was suggesting.
"No. I don't want wet, sandy footprints all over my ship." Meta Knight stated.
"WELL, YOU COULD ALL BUILD A GIANT SAND CASTLE." the Ancient Minister suggested. It was meant to be a joke suggestion, but to his shock, the Smashers went over to Toon Link and started sculpting a castle out of the sand he landed in. Then, to everyone else's shock, the minister said, "IF YOU CAN'T BEAT THEM, JOIN THEM," and went over to help them with the castle.
"...Want to help them build a kicking sandcastle?" a box lying right next to the Normals said.
"...Yes." the Normals all said. So for the rest of the day, the Smashers worked on a giant sandcastle; within a few hours, the castle was actually completed, standing tall and proud over the ruins of the beach house. There, they all partied, danced to music, and played more beach sports; they all wisely decided not to go swimming again. Despite the huge fiasco that had gone on hours before, everyone enjoyed their time at the beach, and were a bit disappointed when they had to leave at sunset. Still though, other than the shitty target practice game and the giant squid attack, it was a fairly great day.
As the sun set across the horizon and the Halberd blasted off, no one saw a motorcycle driving to the shore of the beach. Take a guess on who it is.
...
...What? No. It isn't fucking Geno. Get real.
"Hey! Squiddy!" Wario shouted at the edge of the water. "Get out of there!" The Garlic King waited by the water; the ocean rumbled as the head of the squid emerged from the water.
"Who dare disturbs my slee-"
"Yeah, yeah. Look buddy, have you met with a bunch of losers called the Smashers?"
The squid was a bit pissed that Wario ignored him, but he was intrigued by what he had to say. "...Yes. One of them attacked and woke me up, so I tried to destroy him ALONG WITH EVERYONE ELSE. ...Except I failed to destroy them and I am now heavily scarred..."
"Well, what if I said that I can help you get revenge on those chumps?" Wario offered.
"Really?"
"Yes... We're all going to get revenge on the Smashers, or my title isn't... THE GARLIC KING! WAHAHAHAHA!"
END OF ARC 10
Sadly, you guys won't be voting on another arc this time around, but, I hope you'll enjoy the next arc and the last! As I said at the beginning of the chapter, I started a story over on fictionpress, so go check it out if you're interested. Remember to leave reviews and death threats, and I'll see you guys next time on the next thing I write (oh my god I'm writing a lot of stuff aaaahhh).