Author's Note: Aaah, some professional-ish guy's been looking at some of the dumb things I write recently. Wow, I like his advice.

Also, for those worrying about the paradox where Falco strangled himself in the last chapter, it's been taken care of.

SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW - PART 2

The Halberd sailed through the clouds: all cannons were prepped, all systems were ready, and Falco was ready to tear the jerk who stole his Arwing to shreds. He was hunched over a computer screen with Meta Knight, who was trying to track the absconded aircraft.

"...is that it?" Falco asked, pointing at the screen.

"No, I think that might be a commercial aircraft." Meta Knight replied.

"Damn it, where's my ship...?"

As they pondered over this, King Dedede and Lucario were sitting at a table, watching them work while drinking from cans of soda. Dedede shook his head. "I'll never understand aircraft pilots."

"Agreed." Lucario said. He took a swig of the drink before mentioning, "Didn't you have a blimp once?"

"Kabula? Oh, she blew up."

"She?"

"It was sentient."

"Oh." Lucario wasn't really surprised by this revelation. After a minute more of monotony and high tensions, Falco suddenly shrieked in anger.

"There it is!" He stabbed the computer screen with his finger. "There's my ship!"

"It's heading... toward... us?" Meta Knight said. The ship then rumbled, as loud shots sounded; the Halberd was shooting at the Arwing. Meta Knight quickly ran over to the Halberd's main control panel and looked at one of the screens; Falco's Arwing was circling around the Halberd, dodging all of the Halberd's cannon shots.

Falco yelped as one shot almost hit his Arwing. "Turn off the cannons! Before it harms my precious baby!"

"You were the one that said to turn the cannons on..." Lucario mentioned.

"...Precious baby?" Dedede said, trying to keep himself from laughing.

Falco shot a glare at them that was so angry, it forced them to immediately get to work on that. As buttons and levers were deactivated, the cannons stopped firing. Falco's Arwing was safe... but as soon as it turned around, it was clear that the Halberd is that one that isn't safe. Beeping noises filled the control room as Meta Knight frantically glanced over everything. "It's shooting at the control tower!"

"Wait..." Lucario's eyes widened. "We're in the control tower, aren't we?" That was answered when the glass in the control room broke apart as lasers came in and set fire to everything. "...Well."

"Dedede, go get the fire extinguishers!" Meta Knight commanded, while stomping on his flaming cape.

"Why don't you have sprinklers?" Dedede asked, staying put in his chair.

The knight glared at him. "Do you really want to start an argument now?" The king gulped and left his chair to look for the fire extinguishers.

Meanwhile, Falco's coat had been set ablaze by the laser assault. "AAAARGH! LUCARIO! CAN YOU SEE WHO THAT ASSHOLE IS! AAAARRRGH!" Falco screamed.

"Good idea. Let's see..." His eyes followed the Arwing, which was now turning away from the Halberd and dashing through the clouds. He looked into the interior and he saw... "...WARIO?"

The mere mention of his name flipped a trigger within everybody else. "Wario?" the other Normals said in disbelief.

"...Where'd he learn to fly?" Dedede questioned.

"I don't know, but if I see a dent on my sweetie, there will be hell to pay." the Arwing's pilot said with a clenched fist.

"Oh, so it's sweetie now..."

"DON'T YOU HAVE FIRES TO BE PUTTING OUT?"

"Oh yeah." Dedede turned and saw that the entire other half of the control room was on fire, so he thought it was a good idea to get to extinguishing them.

Meta Knight meanwhile was fiddling at the controls again. "Come here, I'm trying to contact Wario..." Falco and Lucario crowded over to him. "...You don't have to be standing this close."

Falco ignored him. "Hurry up and call him so we can give him a piece of our mind!"

Meta Knight nodded, pressed several more keyboard keys, and video chat opened up on a computer screen. The browser took a few seconds loading up before Wario's mug appeared on it.

Wario made a mighty laugh, showing off his horrible teeth. "Wahaha! It is I, the Garlic Ki-"

"We know who you are." Lucario said plainly. "Also, you really should brush your teeth."

"How dare you tell the king what to do? When the Garlic King comes to power once again, you chumps will all pay!"

Meta Knight sighed. "Wario, you're not likely to take over the Smash Castle again."

"Yes I will!" He snapped. "I have this genius plan! It is so genius, that I can't believe that I actually made it... but I'm a genius! So ignore that metaphor! ...Or simile. Whatever. Who cares abo-"

"WHAT THE HELL MAN?" Falco, who had been bottling up his rage while listening to this asinine discussion, finally exploded. "WHY DID YOU STEAL MY SHIP? WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS MESSING WITH US? WHY ARE YOU SUCH AN ASSHOLE?"

"...Because I'm awesome and you're not!"

"I WILL PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON YOU!"

"Wahaha! Foolish fool! You cannot catch the Garlic Ki- DOOF!" Wario was seen flipping over in the cockpit of the Arwing. "Um... it looks like I crashed into so- WAAARGH!" He flipped over yet again as the aircraft was clearly seen bumping into something.

"What are you crashing into? Are there any scratches on that thing? You better have not hurt my baby!" Falco yelled.

"Um..." Dedede (who was very singed) stammered.

Falco spun to glare at him. "Stop questioning my pet names!"

"It's not that. You guys should, er, really look out the window." Dedede said nervously.

The others acted on his advice and chose to ignore Lord Asshole's bumbling antics to look out the broken window: they were in a green valley, with sunny, somewhat cloudy skies with rainbows hanging overhead. There wasn't just rainbows hanging, however; there were many platforms floating in mid-air, which was what Wario was crashing into. "We... we wandered into Rainbow Ride!" Meta Knight said in awe.

"How... how did that even happen?" Lucario questioned.

"We were too busy with the fire and Wario that we didn't even notic-"

"No, really, how did we get here? I thought in Hyper's headcanon, the Super Smash Brothers universe is entirely separate from the Mario universe and that we all exist in this Nintendo dimension. The only way to travel between these universes are through plot holes, which just exist in space, Subspace, which no one knows how to get to, and teleporters, and we didn't exactly teleport. Therefore, the fact that we're in this situation is fundamentally impossible." Lucario elaborated.

...Um...

"Oh yeah!" Dedede exclaimed. "Also, how could there we a Wal-Mart here? And commercial airliners?"

...It's a leap year.

"Jeez, you're really slipping."

...Oh hey look, that cabinet set on fire. OH NO IT TURNED INTO A GEYSER OF FLAMES AND THE ROOM IS ON FIRE YET AGAIN.

"OH GOD WHYYYYYYY!" Dedede screamed as his robes caught ablaze.

"Guys, can we ignore Hyper's problems with continuity?" Falco said in annoyance. "That asshole," he pointed out the window at his Arwing, which was flying aimlessly through the maze of platforms. "...has no idea how to fly, and he's in the equivalent of a fucking asteroid belt. If I don't get my Arwing back, he'll probably destroy it with himself in it!"

"...Isn't him destroying himself a good thing?" Dedede asked while he was putting the fires out again.

"Not if he's in my Arwing."

To be continued...

Author's Note: As you can clearly see, I just handwaved how they got to Rainbow Ride and made fun about it. *PRO-WRITING SKILLS*