Author's Note: Surprise, you're getting the second-to-last chapter already! For the results of the final poll: Falco is in last place, with only one person wanting to be like him. Too bad for you, Falco. In third is King Dedede, who three people want to be. Slightly better for you, King! Meta Knight holds second place, with five people that want to be him.
In first place, is Lucario, who has six people wanting to be like him! Who doesn't love this Aura Pokémon?
That was a good last poll for this story, but now, let's finish things up!
THE GARLIC KING STRIKES BACK - PART 4
King Dedede proceeded to smash every one of the crates, releasing a Smash Ball from each one. The Normals gathered them up and split it up equally among themselves. Falco clenched one of his Smash Balls tightly in his hand. "Lord Asshole will regret ever messing with us."
"Don't go overboard with it though. Wario presumably has his own Smash Balls with him, so use it at the right time." Meta Knight said with caution.
"We should split up to deal with the Puppits and Wario." Lucario suggested.
"I want to run Wario over." Falco said, somewhat optimistic.
"I'll come with you too, to make sure you don't try to overkill." Meta Knight volunteered.
A tense Lucario turned to face Dedede, gulping. "...well, Dedede, looks like we have to fight the Puppits."
"...But... they scare me." the penguin said, equally as fearful.
"...I know they do. I know."
"Hey, you two relax." Falco snapped. "You guys have Smash Balls; you could tear those stupid wooden jerks apart." This reassured the two reluctant Normals.
Meta Knight reopened the doors of the storage room, only to come face to face with at least ten Puppits, who were surprised by his appearance. "HoW... hOw DiD yOu GeT iN...?"
Before they started swiping at him with their claws, Meta Knight crushed a Smash Ball in his hands; he felt the energy flow into him naturally, like drinking water. I'm not sure if that's a good comparison, but why not. Meta Knight then threw his cape over the Puppits and said in a deep voice, "Behold my power..."
"WhAt..."
"He'S uSiNg A fInAl SmAsH!"
"WeLl CrAp."
"KiLl Hi-"
The Puppits failed to do anything to stop Meta Knight as he slaughtered them with a single swing of his sword. "That takes care of them."
Falco looked at Meta Knight in astonishment before looking down at one of his own Smash Balls. "Well, if it's going to be like that, this will be a cakewalk."
Dialga and Cresselia looked at the computer screen in utter disgust. "Wow, this Garlic King is a real jerk." Cresselia commented.
"Yes, he does seem like quite a scumbag. In fact... I wouldn't be surprised if he was actually the one who did this to our home, or, at the very least, caused it to happen. The fact that he appeared before us shortly after the incident is too much of a coincidence. I must be a dunderhead to not catch that." Dialga said.
"Dunderhead?"
"Yes, dunderhead." the Time Pokemon said as he took a good look around Spear Pillar.
Palkia was trying to push a column back into place. "Will you guys stop reading that dumb story and help me out here?"
The time Pokémon ignored him. "Palkia, I believe we've made a terrible mistake. There's a good chance that the Smashers might not have been responsible for this mess..."
"Well, whether they caused it or not, can you help me CLEAN THIS FUCKING PLACE UP?"
"As soon as we lift the barrier we've put up around the Smashers."
"But look at this shitty mes-"
Dialga frowned then froze time with a shake of his head. "There. You literally have all the time in the world to fix this. Now will you help me?"
"I hate you." However, Palkia stepped up to him anyway, so that they could dispel the bubble together.
As they focused their powers, Cresselia was turning off the computer they got from out of nowhere and started floating away. "I'll go to Smash Castle to apologize. And also tell the Smashers that there's a fanfic about them."
"You do that." Dialga grunted in response.
Wario and the Puppit King stood at the front of the lobby, where they had flipped coins to decide who dies for the last several minutes or so. The Puppit King floated over the crowd of Smashers to summarize the results. "So, ThiRtEeN oF yOu ShAlL sTaY aS tHe GaRlIc KiNg'S sUbJeCtS, wHiLe ThE rEsT oF yOu ArE tO bE eXeCuTeD."
"You forgot to flip for me!" Shiek yelled.
"Wah? Oh right, sorry." Wario apologized, taking his coin out again.
"WARIO, THAT'S ZELDA." Mr. Game and Watch said.
"No, I'm Shiek!" Zelda insisted.
"You heard the girl. Guy. Wa, whatever." before the Garlic King flipped the coin, however, he caught sight of something. "Wahaha! The clocks are moving again!"
A clock on the wall was suddenly moving again, its hands spinning around rapidly to catch up to where time actually was. Some Puppits checked some watches that some of the Smashers wore and confirmed that time was moving again. "Ah, ThE bUbBlE mUsT bE dOwN nOw." the Puppit King cackled. "EvEn If, YoU pItIfUl SmAsHeRs CaN sOmEhOw EsCaPe, We'Ve DiSaBlEd AlL yOuR vEhIcLeS. wE wIlL hUnT yOu DoWn As YoU rUn On FoOt, LiKe ThE pItIfUl RaTs YoU aRe."
"...That's deep." Marth admitted.
"Go, BrInG tHe SqUiD hErE." the king commanded his subjects. Most of the Puppits in the room saluted and floated away to do his bidding.
"WAIT, HOW COULD YOU DISABLE ALL THE VEHICLES?" ROB asked, no longer in his Ancient Minister clothes. "YOU CANNOT HAVE DISABLED THE HALBERD; META KNIGHT DESIGNED IT IN A WAY THAT IT CANNOT BE SABOTAGED UNLESS IT'S ACTIVATED."
"Guess again, loser!" Wario laughed. "I, the Garlic King... and some random guy... took out that stupid battleship!"
"He's telling the truth." a voice said; the voice clearly did not belong to a Puppit. Everybody in the room turned, hero and villain alike, and saw the Normals. The Normals waltzed in the room, without fear, full of confidence, and with full stomachs.
"...Oh right, you three chumps!" Wario facepalmed. "How could I forget your ugly faces?"
Lucario frowned. "We're not that ugly. Well, I'm not sure about Meta Knight but..."
Meta Knight scowled at him. "Not funny."
"Oh, sorry. I wasn't trying to make a joke."
The Puppit King just looked at them absent-mindedly before it clicked in his wooden head who they were. "It'S yOu FoUr! HoW dArE yOu TrY tO rUiN mY pLa-"
"Our plan." Wario corrected.
"...oUr PlAn AgAiN? fOr ThIs, YoU wIlL bE eXeCuTeD iMmEdIaTeLy, AnD yOuR tRoPhIeS sHaLl Be FeD tO tHe SqUiD!" the leading Puppit looked at his subjects. "WhAt ArE yOu WaItInG fOr? KiLl ThEm!"
The Puppits let out a horrible death screech and lunged toward the Normals. Meta Knight jumped to the head of the pack and took out another Smash Ball, to the shock of everybody. Before the Puppits realized how much shit they were in, the room darkened as Meta Knight swung his cape at them. Then, with a flash, the Puppits were broken on the floor. However, something else appeared while the place was dark.
Falco's Landmaster was parked at the end of the room; the magic of the Final Smash fixed whatever the Puppits did to it to sabotage it. Meta Knight clambered into the cockpit with Falco, who was intensely focused on making Wario explode. "Wario, I'm going to blow you up into fat, garlic-smelling pieces!"
The fat king shook his finger. "Wrong! Don't call me Wario..."
"I KNOW YOU'RE THE GARLIC KING, WHATEV-"
"Also wrong! I am..." he pulled out his own Smash Ball and destroyed it in his hands, which caused a flash of light to discharge. "Super King Garlicman!"
"...That is a ridiculous thing to say out lou-" the co-pilot knight could not finish his thought, because Wario thundered in, riding on his motorcycle at top speeds. It pushed the unprepared Landmaster down the hall until both ended up crashing through the wall and plummeting outside.
"...Well that happened." Dedede said, looking at the hole left behind.
The Puppit King hissed at the Puppits that weren't killed. "RaLlY tHe OtHeRs! LoCk Up AlL oF tHe OnEs DeStInEd To LiVe AnD bRiNg ThE rEsT tO tHe CaStLe'S pOoL!" The Puppits quickly started to shove all the non-Normal Smashers out of the room. Then, reinforcements arrived, to take down Dedede and Lucario. Their king just glared at them before flying away to attend to business.
"Do you want the honors?" Lucario asked Dedede.
"Nah, you got this." he answered.
Lucario crushed a Smash Ball in his palm, and his eyes gave a deadly glow.
Even the Puppits were scared by the look in his eyes. "R-rEtReAt!"
Lucario leaped toward them and pointed his hands toward them. The Puppits could only hiss angrily before a large beam of aura fired out of Lucario's hands. The highly concentrated and awesome beam of death easily disintegrated them. However, since the beam lasts longer, Lucario was forced to accidentally burn the floor and carpet until the Final Smash ended. "...Whoops."
"Eh. Not our problem." Dedede assured him. "Come on, we have to free the others!"
The ten Smashers were taking a break from beating up the giant squid, relaxing a good distance away from his tentacles. The squid could only glare at them as they rested.
"We'll get you... after a quick nap!" Ness threatened.
"I will eat all of you."
"Yeah, keep saying that..."
A mass of shadows suddenly moved over the Smashers, prompting them to look up. In the air was an entire murder of Puppits, who were like a pack of crows. They descended to the lake and grabbed onto the head of the squid. They started to lift the gigantic sea creature out of the lake. "Oh, the time has come... So long, fishbait!" The Puppits started to fly away (albeit slowly), their cargo in tow.
The Smashers acted as if that was a normal thing. "...At least our job is done." Samus said.
"Where do you think they're taking that thing?"
"Who cares?"
"Yes! Now we can eat the fish!" Yoshi laughed. He and Kirby ran down to the lake and jumped right in.
"No! We-a came here to save-a the fish!" Mario screamed. The other Smashers dived in after them to keep them from consuming the whole ecosystem.
"MoVe It!" one of the Puppits snapped as they moved Wario's group of Smashers to...
"Where are you even taking us?" Diddy asked.
"We'Ll Be PuTtInG yOu In YoUr RoOmS..."
"Ooh! That's not so bad!"
"...bUt We'Ll DiSaBlE tHe ElEcTrIcItY iN yOuR rOoMs." This was answered with shouts of outrage and dismay.
"Hey! How dare you take away their electricity?" someone said at the end of the hallway. There, at the very far end, was King Dedede, with the Final Smash aura around him.
"He'S cOnSuMeD a SmAsH bAlL! kIlL hIm!"
However, it was too late: King Dedede was already starting to dance. The king lifted his feet and hopped around, while chirping out some foreign song that must have belonged to some ancient penguin culture. Probably. As he sung out his penguin lullaby, his minions - Waddle Dees, Waddle Doos, and Gordos - started to pop into existence and they ran toward the Puppits and captured Smashers. The Waddle Doos and Gordos in particular struck out at the wooden beasts, but they were easily defeated and dispelled.
"WhAt WaS tHaT sUpPoSeD tO dO?" one Puppit said, prompting cackles from the others.
"Ahem." at least thirteen voices said behind the Puppits.
The villainous marionettes turned and saw that the Smashers were no longer bound in chains; Waddle Dees were jumping up and down, holding the discarded chains in their hands.
"You guys have fun with that!" Dedede said before walking away whistling as the Puppits started to screech.
"Why am I being fed to a squid?" Fox whined as the Smashers stood outside the pool. "Wasn't I supposed to be with Mario and Samus and the others?"
"THAT'S A SURPRISINGLY SMART OBSERVATION, COMING FROM YOU, FOX." ROB said.
"At least-a the author forgot to write you-a in on-a accident." Luigi said, crying a little.
"SiLeNcE!" one of their captors hissed. The Puppits looked into the sky and saw something large moving toward the castle. And no, it's not an airplane. Nevermind the extremely weird mechanics and conventions in my stories. "yOuR eXeCuTiOnEr WiLl Be ArRiViNg SoOn. YoU mAy WeEp BiTtEr TeArS uNtIl ThEn."
"Grrf..." Bowser's snout was tied up so that he couldn't breathe fire or yell really loudly.
"No crying till the end, Lucas..." Lucas said to himself quietly.
"There will be no tears today, you terrifying fiends!" a shout came from one of the windows on the second floor.
"WhO dO yOu ThInK wE aR-"
Then a giant blast of blue aura came crashing through the second floor and down upon the Puppits, disintegrating half of them. The other half flew away from the blast as it was redirected toward them. Eventually, the aura ran out, leaving Lucario standing alone in the large gap he created in the wall. "Oh, whoops, I didn't get you all. Just let me get..."
"NoPe." Suddenly, Lucario was pushed out by a Puppit and he landed on the ground face-first.
"Doof... rude.." Lucario muttered. Before he could get back to breaking another Smash Ball, several Puppits surrounded him and held him down.
"FoOliSh PoKeMoN! yOu ShAlL dIe LiKe ThE rEsT oF yOuR cOmRaDeS!" the Puppit said. Lucario glanced in the sky and saw the large object heading towards them, recognizing its writhing tentacles. Lucario decided that this was sort of karma for making the squid angry at everyone in the first place and silently cried to himself.
Then, the unexpected happened - Cresselia flashed into existence. She was happy, completely oblivious to what was going on. "Hello Smashers! Sorry for trapping you all in here! As it turns out, this Garlic King jerk sort of manipulated us into doing it - so sorry! I'll leave all of you guys and your creepy friends to your pool party... oh, and by the way, do you know that some weirdo wrote a fanfic abo-"
Then, Lucas perked up, a thought coming to him. "Wait... did you and Dialga and Palkia send me that message on tumblr?"
"Haha, what's a tumblr?"
Everything was quiet. Lucas realized who sent him that message in the first place. Cresselia realized that this was not a pool party. Lucario realized that the Puppits were now screwed.
Somehow, the chains keeping Lucas together broke apart and the enraged boy threw a PK Fire at the Puppits holding Lucario down, freeing the Pokémon. "How lucky for us." Lucario said, grateful for Cresselia's intervention and Lucas' mindless rage.
"CrAp." The Puppits were then quickly destroyed, with a combination of giant Final Smash beams of pure death and psychic fire. Lucario and Lucas went about untying everybody while Cresselia just floated around, wondering what the hell was going on.
"Oooh, what's that?" Cresselia said, looking at a giant shadow that was now above the castle's pool.
Then, the Puppits dropped the giant squid into the pool, creating a small tidal wave. As he roared angrily, Lucario used another Smash Ball to dispatch the Puppits that lingered in the sky. The squid did not seem to mind this, though. "I will smash you all into a fine paste and suck you all up!" he threatened.
As the Smashers got into battle positions, Cresselia openly questioned. "Is violence always the answer for you guys?"
Right as the fighting was going to start, Lucario shouted. "No! Step back!"
The Smashers decided to listen to him and cautiously moved away from the squid. The squid squirmed, thrashing its tentacles around, trying to hit them. However, everyone was a good distance away from it. That's when everybody realized: the squid can't move; walking away from him was definitely smarter than trying to fight him.
So everyone left, ignoring the squid to attend to the Puppit infestation. "What? Get back here! I'm not done with you!"
"...I guess my job is finished." Cresselia said before she teleported away.
The Smashers that Lucario freed ran in different directions, to start beating the crap out of some Puppits (Bowser's mouth was still bound, but it's probably better that way). Then, King Dedede appeared before Lucario, being carried by his Waddle Dees. "So, what's new?"
"We have a squid in our pool now. Just ignore him." the Pokémon answered.
"Don't you dare ignore me!"
"...Okay. So, this means that we have to fight..." the penguin shivered. "..the head honcho, right?"
"...Yep. Where is he, though...?"
In the courtyard of the castle, an epic battle was waging, between Falco's Landmaster and Super King Garlicman. Both sides quickly had to burn through their Smash Balls before the other side attacked. Every time Wario lost his Final Smash, Meta Knight attacked with his and Falco provided supporting fire; when the two Normals lost theirs, however, Super Garlicman kicked them around until Falco spawned another Landmaster for them to take cover in. As a result, all three participants have accumulated wounds throughout the whole battle.
"Wahaha!" Wario laughed as he bounced around in front of the Landmaster while dressed in his superhero garb. "Come out and fight Super King Garlicman, you scaredy losers!"
Then his Final Smash ended.
"...WAH!" the man screamed as the Landmaster shot at him, blowing him up.
Falco's Final Smash ended, leaving the two Smashers in the grass. "Did I get him?" Falco wondered, looking at the smoke.
"...I AM SUPER KING GARLICMAN!" Wario ran through the smoke, having used another ball after he got hit.
Meta Knight activated his Final Smash as he got near; it was useless, but it'd at least slow Wario or the Garlic King or Lord Asshole or Super King Garlicman or whoever the fuck he is now. "Hurry and re-activate your Final Smash!"
Falco rifled through his pockets and jacket. His eyes widened as he noticed something. Something horrible. "I'm out of Smash Balls!"
"What?" Meta Knight repelled Wario away with his sword before searching himself. "...It... appears that I'm out as well."
"...Run like hell!" Falco grabbed Meta Knight by his cape and started running with him in tow. However, they couldn't really get far, because Wario ran in, kicking Falco across several yards, leaving the two Smashers sprawled on the dirt.
"Wahaha! You Normal chumps lose - not a surprise, since you guys are already a bunch of losers!" Wario mocked as he stepped toward them. "You know what, I'll forgive you. You just have to eat the garlic ice cream that you ungratefuls don't want, hand me all your money, oh, and you better kneel to the Garlic King!"
"W-We'll never kneel to you." Falco coughed in defiance.
"Heh. Too bad for you the-" Suddenly, Wario got engulfed in a blue light. "Wah? I can't see! What is this? Did the sun turn blue?" He wandered around as the column of light focused on him.
Meta Knight and Falco diverted their eyes to the source and they could see Lucario, using his Final Smash as a distraction. "Guys, finish him off!" the Pokémon shouted.
"We used all of our Smash Balls!" Falco screamed back.
"Oh no - I'm using my last one!" Lucario said sheepishly. "Run and look for another one - I'll hold him off!"
"Right. Let's go." Meta Knight said. The two Smashers on the floor start to run away.
"Hey, I can't see any- AAARGH!" Wario lost his powers, allowing him to suffer the full burnt of Lucario's attack, which ended a few seconds later. "Ow, you guys suck! Um..." He stuck his hands in his pockets. "...Uh..."
Falco stopped running and looked across the courtyard at Wario. "Let me guess: you don't have anymore Smash Balls?"
"...Er, I still have some..."
That was of course an obvious lie. Falco started to stomp toward the no longer powered man, fists and teeth clenched. Meta Knight followed, gripping his sword while Lucario descended. The avian pilot cracked his hands as he faced Wario. "I've been waiting to do this for the last three chapters..."
"FoOlS!" Lasers rained down from the sky all of a sudden and hit the three Smashers, forcing them away from Wario; the Puppit King arrived. He floated above Wario, glaring at the three Normals. "yOu MaY hAvE dIsRuPtEd EvErYtHiNg... BuT aS lOnG aS yOu NoRmAlS aRe DeStRoYeD, i'Ll Be SaTiSfIeD." Then, the mannequin king opened up his jaw really wide, releasing something from it.
A Smash Ball poured out from its mouth and landed in Wario's hands.
"Ha! Game over!" Wario laughed. But before he destroyed it...
The ground rumbled under them as they heard a mass of footsteps, distracting Wario from his objective. Then, pouring out the castle came King Dedede's minions. They swarmed the two villainous kings, which caused Wario to drop the ball into the mob. A random Waddle Dee picked it up and ran away in a random direction, intent on keeping it away from them. Then, King Dedede came, being carried by his entourage. "Ha! Dedede saves the day again!"
Wario looked very discouraged and frustrated. "No... no! The Garlic King does not lose! Wario never loses!"
The Puppit King was completely outraged, his head rotating on his neck. "YoU... yOu InSoLeNt SmAsHeRs! I wIlL rIp ThE hEaRtS fRoM yOuR bOdIeS aNd BuRn AwAy YoUr TrOpHy CaRcAsSeS, dEsTrOyInG yOuR fRaGiLe ExIsTeNc-"
Falco punted a Gordo into him, hard enough to shatter the puppet. "Oh shut up."
King Dedede's minions dispersed. That left Wario all alone with the Normals. And the broken pieces of the Puppit King. The villain slowly stepped away from them. "Ha... I'm... sorry?"
"No you're not."
They advanced toward him. However, Lucario suddenly had a change of heart. "Wait, stop."
"Stop?" Dedede said, baffled by his behavior.
"Yes. Would beating him up and kicking him out again be a reasonable course of action?"
"I don't know... revenge is always cool..."
"Dedede, your revenge against Kirby didn't exactly work out." Meta Knight said, realizing what Lucario was getting at, based on Dedede's own experience. "If we ostracize Wario again, he'll come back - just look at what he's done this time. If we take our revenge on him, he'll just come back, more stronger than last time."
Falco looked at Meta Knight then to Wario. Then, he sighed, putting his fists down. "You're right. Even if we beat him up, that won't change how much of an asshole he is."
When even Falco has given up on beating somebody up, it truly is a time to let bygones be bygones.
"You're... really not beating me up?" Wario said.
"...On one condition." Dedede coughed.
"What do you have on mind, Dedede?" Lucario replied with a raised eyebrow.
King Dedede merely gestured at the surrounding landscape. The castle's courtyard was torn up by motorcycle and Landmaster treads, some of it was burning away, and the place smelled horrible, thanks to Wario's dreadful fart attack. Smash Castle was also in poor shape, with multiple holes in it and scattered Puppit limbs everywhere.
Then, the Smashers arrived. They were led by ROB, who was now wearing his Ancient Minister garb again. Considering that they were all holding weapons, it was obvious that they also wanted a piece of Wario. "OH, YOU HAVEN'T KILLED WARIO YET. HOW SURPRISING."
"Minister, you have to reconsider letting everyone beat up Wario." Lucario said. Before anyone could openly question it, the Pokémon hopped up to the minister and whispered something in his ears.
"...VERY WELL THEN. WARIO, YOU SHALL BE SPARED FROM OUR WRATH, AND YOU'RE ALLOWED TO CONTINUE BEING A SMASHER." The crowd of fighters behind him groaned in dismay, wondering why he would say such a thing. "...HOWEVER..."
"Wah?"
"...YOU HAVE TO FIX THE DAMAGES DONE TO THE CASTLE AND CLEAN IT UP. ON YOUR OWN TIME AND WITH YOUR OWN MONEY."
Now that was a definite blow toward Wario. "B-but..."
"You own a successful-a company, Wario!" Luigi shouted.
"YES, IT SHOULDN'T BE A PROBLEM."
"...Oh fine." The fat man sighed, conceding defeat.
Everybody was satisfied. The Puppits were all gone. The king was slain. Wario got a reasonable punishment. The squid's not a threat unless somebody was stupid enough to stand near him. Everything would be just fine. "THE PRIMIDS THAT HAVE SURVIVED ARE COOKING A VICTORY FEAST FOR EVERYONE AS WE SPEAK - WITH NO GARLIC, I MIGHT ADD. WHILE ALL OF US WORKED TOGETHER IN GETTING RID OF THE THREAT, REALLY, WE COULDN'T REALLY HAVE GONE FAR IF IT WEREN'T FOR THE NORMALS."
Cheers and chants came. The four Smashers felt flustered as the other Smashers shouted their names. Somebody threw a party ball into the mix, and everyone waited to see what the gift would be.
"It really is over, huh?" the avian pilot said.
"...It'll never be over, as long as we're stuck in this story." the knight replied.
"At least we have each other, right?" the Pokémon said.
"Yeah, we're a sweet bunch of friends! Nothing can stop us!" the king cheered.
Then the party ball opened.
"IT'S FULL OF BOB-OMBS!" Falco screamed.
The Smashers that were sent out to the lake stood at the entrance to the castle, baffled that everyone was gathered in a destroyed courtyard, the fact that they were exploding, and the fact that Wario was picking up wooden limbs while grumbling.
"...What...?" was all Pikachu could muster.
END OF THE FINAL ARC
Author's Note: The epilogue will come either later today, tomorrow, or Monday. My final thoughts on this story will be there, so see you guys then!