A/N: Hey there :) This story just reached the 100,000 word mark, and it would make me so, so happy to reach 100 reviews along with it. If six of you lovely people review, my day will be made! Here's the wedding a lot of people said they wanted to see. Oh and I think President Snow will make an appearance by the next chapter.
I fall into a hushed silence as I gaze at my reflection in the vanity mirror. I try my hardest to take in every little detail. Today is one of the most important days of my life, and I want to remember every bit of it.
I won't allow myself to forget the exact way my wedding dress fits. It's a simple white dress that drapes to the floor. True, it's nothing like the elaborate dresses I'm given in the Capitol, but that doesn't matter. It's simple and elegant, and when I look at my reflection, I see me. Not a Capitol pawn. It's the kind of dress I would've worn at my wedding even if I had never been part of the Hunger Games.
My hair is done in a formal up-do and I am wearing some subtle makeup. I can imagine how different I would look if I had a prep team working on me.
It was my choice to keep this day small and intimate. It's no secret in Panem that Alec and I are together, even though we tried to keep it quiet at first. I was scared the President wouldn't approve, but eventually it became clear that having a victor couple only made the Games more marketable.
I guess that's the best way it could've worked out. What I don't like is that it's made us get more involved with the media, making it impossible for me to fly under the radar. The silver lining is that people will stop caring in a few years when there are more new victors to obsess over. Eventually, we'll be old news.
That day hasn't come quite yet, but my wedding day isn't something I'm willing to share with the Capitol.
My mother comes up behind me and squeezes my hand supportively. "You look beautiful, Mags. So beautiful."
I smile and thank her as Marilla bursts through the door.
"Aunt B, Hallie's dress doesn't fit!" she says in a rush.
My mother's smile pulls into a frown. "It fit her a few weeks ago. Where's your mom?" she asks.
"Late as usual," Marilla replies.
"Okay, I'll go help Hallie." On that note, my mom makes her exit.
Marilla leans against the door. She's nearly sixteen and looks so much different than the child I remember. For as much as she's changed physically, her personality has remained the same.
"So today's the day you tie the knot. Huh. You should have an interesting night tonight," she says, her face pulling into a sly smile at the end.
"Anddd you're not making any comments like that during the ceremony. I mean it, don't," I say. I'm smiling, but I'm completely serious at the same time.
"Okay, fine. I'll be nice because it's your special day," she sighs. "Where's the net thing you've been working on?" she asks, her blue eyes darting around the room.
"Oh. Hold on, I'll get it." I walk across the room and pull a large grass net out of a box. It's District Four tradition that the bride and groom craft a net together to drape over each other during the vows. Alec and I have been working on it for the past week. I'm pretty proud of our work.
"What do you think?" I ask my younger cousin.
Marilla examines it carefully. "It's cool." She pauses for a while before she speaks next. "Um, Mags, can I ask you something?"
"Of course. What is it?" I ask in concern. I try to search her expression for any clue to what it is and come up empty-handed.
"After you're married and if you have kids…you're not just going to like disappear are you? I mean, you'll still have time for me and my sister, right?" she asks, avoiding my eyes.
"Nothing's going to change. I promise," I say. I'm pretty confident that's the truth.
"Okay," she says, sounding relieved. "But are you going to have kids? I remember you said you wanted to."
"Um, yeah I still want to eventually, but I'm just not sure if I want to risk it…" I trail off, but Marilla just looks confused. "The reaping," I clarify. "And the media. The kid wouldn't stand a chance at living a normal life. And I still have a lot of time to think this over. Today's my wedding day, so I really shouldn't even be worrying about this right now." I stop myself then because I feel like I'm rambling. "What about you?" I ask, changing the subject. "Still opposed to marriage and kids?"
"I'm fifteen. I don't even need to think about that." she answers.
"Okay then," I shrug and turn back to the mirror.
"Are you nervous?" she asks.
"A little," I admit. "Well, maybe more than a little. I'm more excited than nervous, though."
My mother bustles back into the room. "Fixed the dress situation. Time to get everything set up. We're falling behind schedule!" I smile then because this is the first time I can say my mom sounds like Isidora. Usually the comparison words the other way around.
She hands Marilla the box with the net and tells her to bring it down to the beach. The preparations continue for a while I am left sitting by the vanity, anticipation creeping up on me. Eventually, my father comes to get me, and we make the walk down to the beach. We continue walking towards a secluded section a good ways down the shoreline.
"This has to be one of the hardest things a dad has to do. It's not easy giving you away," my father says. He doesn't say it, but we are both thinking that this isn't the first time he's had to give me away. Saying goodbye after the reaping was a completely different situation, though. It was a literal giving away rather than a figurative one.
I know we both prefer the figurative kind.
As soon as I can make out the shapes of our guests in the distance, my dad steers me behind the sand dunes, so I will be concealed when we reach the site. I peer around the dunes and look at the scene.
We don't have very many guests, but that is to be expected from a semi-secretive private wedding. My family is there of course, and so is Kallan. There are just a handful of other family friends. Some chairs have been set up in the sand in two distinct sides, leaving enough room in the middle to form an aisle. A few plants adorn each side, and flower petals are scattered around.
At the end of the aisle is Alec. Instead of wearing one of the expensive suits from the Capitol, he's in nice dress clothes that don't seem out of place in District Four. It's light and airy and perfect for a beach wedding. I can't help but smile looking at him. My fiancé. Soon he will be my husband. Husband; I like the sound of it.
Everyone takes their seats and I feel my breathing spike. This is it. I remember again to take in the little details. It's early evening. The air is warm and the clouds at just starting to gain a rosy tint. The ocean gently swooshes in the background.
My father takes my hand again and slowly leads me out into the open. We make our way down the sandy aisle, and I can feel everyone's eyes on me. I glance around and smile nervously. Then I look down to the end of the aisle where Alec is waiting for me. Just these few steps separate us. Just these few steps to reach the place we will be pronounced husband and wife.
I give up on trying to memorize the exact way the bottom of my dress slides against the sand, or the expressions on each individual's face. I'm to focused on getting to Alec; to the end of the waiting. We finally make it, and my father hands me over to my soon-to-be husband.
Alec reaches out and grips both of my hands as we turn to face each other. I'm grinning up at him and he's smiling at me, and everything is right. This is perfect. All I can feel is happiness. After what we've both been through, it's a great feeling.
It takes me by surprise when someone drapes the grass net over both of our shoulders. I feel like it bounds us together in a way, separating us from everyone else here. Everyone outside is so distant. I step in a little closer to Alec, noting the way the sunlight creates highlights on his face. His eyes are so green and he has those little lines around his smile that I love so much.
We have a friend of my father's in charge of leading the ceremony. After the net is situated around us, he begins. "We are gathered here today to celebrate the union of Alec Calder and Magnolia 'Mags' Brine. We'll begin with the traditional wedding song."
He leads the signing, and the others chime in from memory. The song seems as old as time itself, and it compares marriage to a voyage at sea. My eyes are still trained on Alec as I listen to the gentle rhythm of the melody.
Take my hand and come with me
Today our journey starts
Our ship has finally been set free
Come aboard and head to sea
To the unknown we now depart
Piece by piece we put together
This ship we will now share
Built to last through any weather,
Meant to sail until forever
Bound by patience, born by care
Today we leave the sandy shore
In our tracks is all we've known
But there's so much to explore
New sights and pleasures, open doors
A brand new life to call our own
Gentle smiles kept content
The sun will shine through lazy days
But even sun cannot prevent
The windy storms that will torment
And form a cloudy haze
Winds will howl, masts will break,
It all becomes hard to take.
But after sun has cleared the rain,
You'll find the joy outweighs the pain.
If that doesn't describe my life, I don't know what does. We are surrounded by pain, but moments like these make it all worth it and then some. Marriage will be the same way. Even though we are both young, I feel like we've come to learn a lot about life. I know we will make this work, regardless of any rough seas ahead.
I'm suddenly very eager for the rest of the ceremony, but I patiently listen to the rest of the song.
A solemn vow, sincere, for sure
Will make this last forevermore.
No matter how far we may roam,
The sea will always call us home.
Take my hand and come with me
Today our journey starts
Our ship has finally been set free
Come aboard and head to sea
To the unknown we now depart
Our ship has finally been set free
Come aboard and head to sea
The song comes to an end and all voices fall silent. The ceremony leader picks up from there.
"Marriage is a voyage only the most dedicated couples are fit to take. Only ships built with a strong foundation can pass the test. The most important building block is love. It is the strongest thing in this world, something that bounds us together no matter the circumstances. Today, this couple will be joined in the name of love as they prepare to take their own journey out to sea."
He pauses for a minute, then speaks to Alec. "Alec, are you prepared to take this voyage with Mags? To give her your complete dedication and remain by her side through sun and the storm?"
"I do," Alec says, his eyes still staring into mine, and the words make me feel so, so warm.
"Mags, are you prepared to take this voyage with Alec and remain by his side through sun and the storm?"
I have no trouble answering, "I do." As is traditional in Four, the ceremony holder speaks the vows the couple has prepared for each other while first the groom, then the bride repeat them. It's Alec's turn and I can't hear the older man at all. I know there are words coming out of his mouth, but it's all a blur, a smudge in the background. I want to remember exactly how these words sound coming from Alec.
"I, Alec, take you, Mags, to be my equal partner in life, today, tomorrow, and forever. I promise to help you through the hard times that lie in the future and heal over wounds from the past, to provide you the life you have always wanted, and to let you know you are never alone."
He's still looking at me, and I know each word is sincere. We altered the traditional vows because we aren't exactly in a traditional setting. There is a whole dark world we are forced to partake in, but these promises made right here, in the early evening on this beach, say that we will get through it together. That's what we need most as victors.
I can't stop my eyes from watering. There have been so many times that I've cried tears of devastation and pain. Tears of happiness is a completely different feeling. I'm so overwhelmed by the feeling of joy; by the realization that I'm getting the life I've always dreamed of after all, even if I had to go through a lot to get to this point. What could be more perfect?
The officiate addresses me next. "Mags, it's time for you to say the sacred vows."
He starts reading the words I have written, and I'm not surprised at all to find I can barely focus on them. Not that it matters, because I have these words memorized. I'm usually so bad at articulating what I want to say when things are emotional, but when I open my mouth, the words are miraculously right there. They slide out into the air, softly and easily.
"I, Mags, take you, Alec, to be my equal partner in life, today, tomorrow, and forever. I promise to guide you through rough times, to be there for you whenever you need a shoulder to lean on, and to let you be yourself and live your life based on your own decisions."
I smile when I'm done, happy tears still building up in my eyes. Alec gives my hand a reassuring squeeze, and in it are the unspoken words we're almost there.
The ceremony leader leans down and brings over a metal bowl of saltwater taken from the sea. He clears his throat and explains the ancient tradition. "It is custom to seal the marriage with salt water. Salt binds us together through life, as it finds a place in sweat, tears, and the ocean that provides for us. This salt water will bind Alec and Mags with the power of the sea as they begin their lives together."
He holds out the shiny bowl for us and we each unlink a hand to dip two fingers into the cool liquid. I touch my fingers to Alec's lips, slowing guiding them over the top and the bottom as he does the same to me.
The ceremony leader's voice is joyous when he recites the next words. "I now declare you husband and wife! Alec, you may kiss the bride."
He cups my hands in his face and we finally separate the distance between us. I can taste the salt on his lips and I could not be any more happy. I'm barely even aware of the others gathered here for us. I'm here with my husband. My husband. 'Perfect' doesn't do enough justice to describe this moment.
When we finally pull away, I snuggle in as close as possible and lean against him. Our net is still draped around us.
"I'm so happy," I say with as much strength as I can.
"So am I," he says, and he looks out towards the sea. I follow his eyes to see what he sees. At first, I think he must be looking at our little crowd of guests who are cheering and have started to move around.
"We've had a lot of big days by the ocean, haven't we?" he asks.
I think about that for a second and nod. "First date and kiss, engagement, and now marriage."
It's true that the ocean has always been there as a constant, no matter how crazy life got. It always has been and always will be. I'm still thinking about this when Kallan comes up from behind and throws his buff arms around both of us, rustling the grass net.
"Well come on, happy couple! Keep standing here and you'll miss your own wedding reception."
Alec takes my hand and our group walks back down the beach, all the way to my family's house in Victor's Village. My mom and aunt have decorated the house with candlelight and flowers, and they cleared out the living room furniture to form a dance floor. On the table sits a two-layer homemade wedding cake.
The next few hours are filled with a lot of dancing and laughter. For me, it's all kind of a blur. Everyone stops to congratulate me and I dance with a few different people. Most of the time I spend in Alec's arms though, slowly swaying across the living room floor. When it's time to cut the cake, Alec can't resist the urge to smear the icing over my nose, which brings some laughs from the guests.
Kallan is by far the loudest one there, which I'm kind of grateful for because I haven't exactly been talkative tonight. I'm in some sort of content daze. When it's finally time to leave, Alec scoops me up bridal-style and carries us to the door. I do a last scan of the waving people in the room and catch sight of Marilla and Hallie getting seconds on the cake. I smile at Marilla and mouth a thank-you for being on her best behavior. She laughs and shakes her head slightly.
Once out the door, we walk through the warm darkness to our honeymoon location, also known as our house next door. The sensations are still overpowering: the warmth, the love, the happiness. I know as we step into his house and head upstairs that we are beginning our first of countless nights as a married couple. This isn't the first time I've gotten a new start in life, but it is the first time I've gotten to choose. And I couldn't be any happier with my choice.
The Capitol will find out eventually, I'm sure. They'll intrude on our lives as they always do, but that's a bridge we'll cross when we get there. Tonight belongs to us and only us.
It's been a few weeks since the wedding, and I am still in an overall delighted mood. I'll be perfectly happy if this feeling never ends. It's nine in the morning and Alec and I are laying in bed, both of us too lazy to get up and start the day. I'm more than okay with staying where I am now, curled up against my husband with my head on his shoulder. The word husband still makes my giddy. Even now, it brings a smile to my lips.
I feel Alec's hand against my back and I let my eyes close, only to open them a minute later when the phone lets out a shrill ring from across the room.
"Should we get that?" Alec asks.
"I say we let it ring," I comment, leaning back down into his shoulder and closing my eyes again. I'm grateful when the annoying ringing stops, but then it picks up again seconds later. After the third time, Alec finally pulls himself out of bed to get it.
I lay under the ruffled sheets and listen curiously. It's hard to tell what's going on. The only thing Alec contributes to the conversation is questions like "what time?" and "where is it?".
"What was that about?" I ask after he hangs up.
"They just finished building a career training school. Today's the orientation and apparently victors have to be there." He frowns. "I guess we better get ready to go."
"Great." I say unenthusiastically. I reluctantly pull myself out of our bed and head for the closet. I'm not sure how I missed the construction of an entire training school. It's not much of a surprise, though. I knew this day was coming for the past few years.
The skills used in daily life in Four gives tributes an upper hand even without formal training. I guess we are trying to get even with One and Two. That doesn't change the fact that I hate the idea of kids volunteering. I thought it was ridiculous from the beginning and I've really hated it since Kai volunteered. He shouldn't have even been a part of the Games that year. He would still be alive now.
The way I see it, training is okay if it's just for preparation. It's fine to be on the safe side if the reaping doesn't go in your favor. Making kids overconfident and encouraging volunteering is a completely different story.
We meet up with Kallan on the way there. He seems way more pumped up about this than I am.
"I say it's a good thing. I mean, who would you rather mentor? A poor little kid who everyone knows will be a bloodbath or someone who's trained for years? I'm telling you, Four will have a lot more victors because of this," he explains.
He does have a point, but I don't want to admit it. I just make a noncommittal sound in response.
The Career school is impossible to miss. It's tall and grey, and somehow it looks harsh and out-of-place compared to the rest of Four. We're just a humble little fishing village. This is a building that belongs in the Capitol.
Kids as young as seven or eight are running into the building, yelling with excitement. Most of the children are boys, though there are a good number of girls coming too. Which one of these kids will I be mentoring a few years down the road?
The three of us victors are led to the front of the room as a stern man makes a speech and introduces us. We aren't made to talk, but we do get a tour of the school after. There seems to be a room devoted to each type of weapon, and classes range from beginning level to expert.
It reminds me a little bit of the Training Center stations, except none of these classes are devoted to survival skills. It's all physical stuff; as long as you can yield a weapon, why worry about the rest? I think back to how I was more adept with using resources than actually fighting. This would not have been the place for me at all.
On our way back home, I spend a lot of time looking down at the pavement.
"You okay?" Alec asks in concern.
I look up and give him a weak smile. "Yeah. I just don't feel great about this new school. I guess Kallan had a point about it being a good thing. I just don't know."
"Look, we'll deal with that when we have to. We don't need to worry about the Games again for months, Mrs. Calder."
He knows how much my new name makes me smile. I don't ever have to willpower to be stressed about the training ordeal any longer. I'll hold onto my happiness for now, and I know that it's strong enough to take us a long way.