"I really think this is a very bad idea," said Remus unsurely.

I shrugged, and rubbed my hands together with a grin. "Yeah, well. Watch out."

And then I made a movement as if I were pressing something downwards with my hands just as my friends jumped, sending fire all around us. Sirius stared at me. "Since when can you do that?"

"Since now," I said nonchalantly.

"James," said Regulus, glancing around. "I think you've really confused the reader."

"Regulus, what have I told you about breaking the fourth wall?" scolded Lily.

"Sorry, Lils!"

Alright, then, let's rewind. As you're probably wondering why we were fighting for our lives and what we were fighting against, I will start at the beginning…

A black-haired boy zoomed around the kitchen on a miniature broom-

WOAH, HANG ON! Not that far back! No baby stories! Not that far back. Let's try this again…

"JAMES! I'm bored," complained Sirius, flopping down on his bed. I glanced up from my homework to give him a bemused look. "Do something interesting."

"Mate, you're the one that does the interesting stuff," I said, raising an eyebrow. "I'm doing homework."

"James, you're boring."

"Thank you."

There was a blessed silence in the next few moments, until Regulus's voice rang out: "JAMES! I'm bored!"

I groaned and let my head fall onto my desk. "Okay. Why are you telling me?"

"So you can cure my boredom," said Regulus. I looked up. He was floating upside down right in front of me. "Wanna sneak into the kitchens?"

"Not particularly," I said. "Again, I'm doing homework. Go bother someone else. Anyone else."

"Like Voldemort?" asked Sirius.

"Sure, go bother Voldemort," I said, slightly more preoccupied with my Ancient Runes homework and fairly confident that my brothers had some intelligent.

Silence reigned, only broken by the scratching of my quill. After a few minutes, another voice broke my concentration.

"James," said Peter unsurely. "I thought you might want to know that Padfoot and Red just ran out of the Gryffindor Common Room looking like they were about to wreak unmatched chaos and destruction upon the whole world."

I paused, and suddenly realised I'd just given Sirius and Regulus permission to go bother Voldemort. I cursed under my breath, and decided that next time my brothers were bored, I'd pay more attention to their ideas before saying 'sure, go ahead.'

I ran out of the dorm room, followed closely by Peter, only to run straight into Lily, who looked mind of confused and worried at the same time..

"What's going on?" asked Lily, holding my arm. "You look panicked."

"I just gave Sirius and Regulus permission to go bother Voldemort," I told her. She blinked at me and opened her mouth. "I know, I know, I'm an idiot."

"Actually, I was going to say that they were idiots, but, yes, you're right," said Lily dryly.

I reddened slightly, but did not argue (after all, it was I who said it in the first place; to argue would be kind of hypocritical).

"Um, James, do we have a plan?" asked Peter.

"Yeah," I said easily. "I'm going to find them and the rest of you are going to stay at Hogwarts where it's safe."

Lily face-palmed, and Peter gave me a deadpan look. "Yeah… good luck with that, Prongs. OI! MOONY!"

Remus looked up from his book, and so did several other students.

"We're off on a secret mission," said Peter cheerfully. "You in?"

"Do you even need to ask?" said Remus, putting his book down and bookmarking it.

"Oh, Merlin," muttered a seventh year prefect, staring at us with undeniable horror. "Potter's lot is off on another suicide mission."

Several groans followed her statement, along with comments like: "It's a miracle any of them are still alive!"

"It seems," I said bemusedly (though I had to agree) as we walked out, "our reputation precedes us."

"So what's the problem?" asked Remus.

"Why do you assume there's a problem?" I asked curiously.

Remus rolled his eyes. "Because every time we run off like this there's a problem, and it usually involves you and Sirius and Regulus. So?"

"James told Sirius and Regulus to go bother Voldemort," said Peter, as if he were simply commenting on the weather.

Remus paused midstep. "You told them to what?"

"They'd left by the time I realised my mistake," I lamented.

We reached my dad's office in record time. I poked my head in, and he looked up from helping a first year. "Yes, James?"

"Just wanted to let you know we might have to leave the school depending on how far Sirius and Regulus have gone," I said quickly. "Hopefully we'll stop them before they find Voldemort, but, you know them… anyway, bye!"

And then we ran as fast as we could before my dad realised what we said. We ran right past Severus, who bewilderedly followed us (have I mentioned how much I love my friends and how they'll follow me blindly like that?).

As we ran through the halls, perplexing students and teachers alike, I whipped out my wand and yelled a spell that would hopefully lead us straight to Sirius and Regulus. Two lines, one white and one red flickered into existence in front of me, and I smirked.

"Potter, where are we going?" exclaimed Severus from behind me.

Lily made a face. "Hopefully not straight to Voldemort. But, given how fast Sirius and Regulus seem to be able to move, it's almost foolish to hope."

"Oh, come on, they can't have found him," I scoffed. "Not unless he's in the Forbidden Forest or something."

All of us were silent for a moment.

"Five galleons Voldemort is in the Forbidden Forest," said Remus dryly.

"The universe really hates us," Peter moaned as we ran into the forest. Luckily, it didn't take us long to find Regulus and Sirius. They were hard to miss, causing all the ruckus they were while fighting acromantulas.

Wait… acromantulas!?

"I'm not sure what's worse," muttered Lily, shuddering. "Voldemort or giant spiders."

"Giant spiders," Peter said automatically. "Voldemort won't eat us."

"Point," said Lily.

I rolled my eyes and threw a fireball at one of the acromantulas. Regulus and Sirius glanced at me.

"Hey, you finished your homework?" Regulus asked happily.

"No," I said irately. "You two ran off like a couple of idiots, and I was honour-bound to come save your tails."

"Honour-bound?" asked Sirius, raising an eyebrow. "James, you wound me."

"Good," I said flatly.

"Potter!" snapped Severus. "Got a plan on how to deal with the giant spiders?"

"Yeah," I said. "Shoot random spells at them and if one succeeds, stick to it!"

"I really think this is a very bad idea," said Remus unsurely.

I shrugged, and rubbed my hands together with a grin. "Yeah, well. Watch out."

And then I made a movement as if I were pressing something downwards with my hands just as my friends jumped, sending fire all around us. Sirius stared at me. "Since when can you do that?"

"Since now," I said nonchalantly. "And, Regulus, not a word- I've caught the reader up."

Regulus clamped his mouth shut.

Lily was shooting wordless cutting spells at the acromantulas, all the while yelling: "Die, evil arachnids, die and suffer in the deepest pits of the underworld!"

"Your girlfriend is kind of scary," Peter said, eyeing Lily weirdly.

I smiled. "Yeah, but you gotta love her for it."

Unsurprisingly, it was Lily who killed the most of them, and scared the rest of them off. The rest of us kind of stared at her; she flipped her fiery hair out of her face and gave us an innocently confused look. "What? I really hate spiders."

"Yeah," said Severus. "We can tell."

"I am so in love with you right now," I told her. She laughed, and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek.

"I should hope so," she quipped.

"Urgh, get a room, you two!" complained Sirius.

"So…" said Remus awkwardly. "Shall we get back to school before Professor Potter sends out a search party?"

We all exchanged looks, and took off in a dead sprint back to the school.

"So you didn't find Voldemort?" asked Dad, arms crossed.

"Just a bunch of acromantulas," said Sirius.

Despite myself, I started laughing. "I bet you thought Voldemort was in the Forbidden Forest, too!"

Dad gave me a weird look, before returning his attention the Sirius and Regulus. "So you ran into a bunch of acromantulas?"

Regulus nodded. "We thought they were close enough. Tried bothering them."

"Voldemort's nicer," said Sirius sagely. "Although, if we could make him look like an acromantula and then sic Lily on him…"

I couldn't help it. A sadistic smile crossed my face at the ensuing image of Lily savagely attacking acromantula-Voldemort, all while cackling and yelling, "Die, Voldemort! Die like the spider you are! Suffer and die!"

"We should totally do that," I decided, the grin still plastered on my face. "And we should bring a camera, too."

"Er…" said Dad awkwardly. "Okay, then. Well, as long as everyone's okay, then you're not in trouble."

We all breathed a sigh of relief.

"But-"

We all groaned.

Dad raised an eyebrow. "But I'll have to inform your mother."

"Oh, please give us detention instead!" begged Sirius. Regulus and I nodded in agreement.

Dad chuckled. "Sorry, boys. I have no choice in the matter."

I sighed. "Well, we lived good lives, right, mates?"

Sirius and Regulus nodded solemnly.

"Besides," said Dad, looking slightly amused by our actions. "You scared that first year! We don't talk about Voldemort in front of the little ones."

I shrugged, not really bothered. The kids didn't need to be scared of Voldemort, but I didn't think we needed to hide his existence from them or anything. "I mentioned it once. On accident. Sort of. Besides, would you have rather I lied?"

"Not really, but, in the meantime," said Dad, abruptly changing the subject (I wasn't sure whether to be glad or put out at this). "Albus wants to see you, James. He says it's urgent."

I tilted my head and shrugged. "Alright, I'll be off then."

"Good luck, mate," said Sirius.

"And you two," said Dad as I left, "can help me sort these papers."

"Aw, come on, Dad!"

I laughed as I walked down the hall, glad to escape that fate. It wasn't until I reached the entryway to Dumbledore's office that I realised that that man never gives me his stupid passwords!

"Chocolate frogs," I said.

Nothing.

I frowned. "Lemon drops? Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans?"

Still no luck.

"Dumbledore, open the bloody door!" I yelled. I didn't expect it to work, and it didn't, so I kicked at the gargoyles. They glared at me, and I glared right back.

"No password, no entry," grunted one.

"Alright, then," I muttered. "Snickers? Three Musketeers? Uh… Frozen Pineapples?"

The gargoyles moved aside at the last statement. I blinked in shock.

"That was a joke," I said in disbelief.

The gargoyles did not seem to care. One shrugged. "We don't make these up."

"Sometimes I worry about Dumbledore," I mumbled to myself as I climbed onto the spiral staircase and made my way up to Dumbledore's office. It was pretty easy to figure out what was wrong, if the familiar voice was anything to judge by (though I hadn't remembered him being so… erm… loud).

"I swear, old man, if this is one of your stupid tricks, I will run away to the States!" the voice was ranting as I walked in. I crossed my arms bemusedly and leaned up against the edge of the doorway as the battle-worn man spoke.

"I can prove I am not lying," said Dumbledore passively, nodding to me, "if you would turn around."

The man turned and went sheet white. "J-james?"

"Hello, Frank," I said calmly. "I hope you're doing well."

Frank promptly fainted.

"Well," said Dumbledore pleasantly. "That went well. Lemon drop?"

A/N: PLEASE READ MY AUTHOR'S NOTE! Sorry. Had to make sure you were all paying attention. I am alive! And a published author! That's right, folks, I have written a book and it's on AMAZON! I'm so excited! You can search up "What is Real Magic?" on Amazon, and it's the one called Courage by Keara Harris. :D Link is on my profile, too.

Anyway, I hope all of you enjoyed this chapter! Big thanks to everyone who's stuck with me and to all my wonderful reviewers: N. E. Person, jkawesome, jeremiah123, Lady Loophole, Imaginer.012, and Betty.S! Love you guys!

I don't own Harry Potter. But I do own "What is Real Magic?" :D