Marinette didn't often have friends over, as her room was relatively small. A converted attic didn't tend to lend itself toward being spacious in the best of situations, but given that Marinette's room was filled with dress forms and half completed art projects that friends and family had requested, it was an even tighter squeeze than usual.
It had been five days since she and Adrien had agreed to pretend to be in a relationship, and after some pointed questions from Chloe, they realized that they knew very little about each other. Or, rather, Adrien had come to the conclusion that he had very little information about Marinette. Nino, ever the creative problem solver, had a solution.
And this solution, as it turned out, involved Marinette, Alya, Nino, and Adrien all stuffed into Marinette's pink attic room. Marinette sat on her bed with Alya right beside her in case of the necessity for emotional support, while Nino lounged on the couch and Adrien took the desk chair. She'd had just enough warning to bolt up and take down every picture of Adrien that she'd tacked to her wall before he'd come in, but she was not entirely sure she'd found them all.
Despite the low key panic over Adrien finding something embarrassing in her room, she still managed to be completely on Cloud 9 at this turn of circumstance. Adrien, the model, the philanthropist, the boy of her dreams was right there, in her desk chair. She could almost cry from how beautiful it was.
"So, what's the plan here, Nino?" Adrien asked, sliding his phone into his pocket.
Nino took two small whiteboards out of his backpack, accompanied by two dry erase markers, and handed them to Marinette and Adrien respectively. Marinette decidedly did not approve of the wicked gleam in his eye, nor of the fact that Alya seemed to have been clued into the plan.
"We're going to ask you questions about each other, and you're both going to write the answer on the board. You'll reveal it at the same time, and you'll learn about each other!" Nino announced proudly.
Marinette looked at Alya, panicked. There was no way something good would come of Adrien finding out exactly how much she knew about him. Alya shrugged and patted her on the shoulder reassuringly.
"You'll both do fine," Alya said, winking at Marinette. "I think you'll be surprised at how much you already know about each other!"
"I'm in," Adrien said, smiling and uncapping his pen. "Give us the first question, bro!"
Nino opened up a notebook he'd been keeping in his bag, and Alya moved from the bed over to the couch so that she could see his questions. Marinette had never felt so abandoned. Still, she uncapped her marker and prepared for the first question.
Alya began, reading off of the list of questions she had no doubt helped put together: "What is Marinette's favourite animal? Marinette, you write your answer, and Adrien, write what you think the answer is."
Marinette hastily wrote the word 'hamsters' and doodled a quick hamster along with her answer. If she had to do this, she might as well make it cute. When Nino announced that it was time to show their answers, she hesitantly put her board up, as though she were the one being tested.
On Adrien's board was a caricature of a black cat, no words required.
Alya began to laugh.
Adrien looked at Marinette's board with a perplexed expression, looked back at his, and squinted at hers. Marintte tried to smile encouragingly, but just the thought of Chat finding out that anyone presumed that her favourite animal was a cat (a black one, no less!) was...appalling. Additionally, the fact that her brain immediately supplied the alternative word "a-paw-lling" put the icing on the cake. She was spending far too much time with that ridiculous alley cat.
"Hamsters, huh?" Adrien said, smiling despite his evident disappointment at being wrong. "I totally had you pegged as a cat lady."
"Pfft, never," Marinette replied, shaking her head firmly.
"After you said Chat Noir was cool, I thought it was a natural assumption," Adrien mused.
"I…" Marinette did not want to get caught in a lie, or expose the fact that she'd been trying to tell Adrien that he was far cooler than that stinky kitty Chat Noir, so she scrambled. "Just because Chat Noir is okay doesn't make him my favourite," she explained weakly.
"Next question," Nino announced, reading from his notebook with an overabundance of pride. "What instrument does Adrien play?"
Easy. Marinette wrote 'piano' upon her board and tried to figure out if she knew how to draw a piano, before deciding that she didn't. The time was soon up, and she proudly displayed her board, which matched Adrien in everything but the handwriting.
She beamed at him, and he smiled back.
"One point for Marinette!" Nino said, and handed the notebook to Alya.
"Adrien's turn to try to prove that he didn't bribe Marinette into being his girlfriend without having done his research!" Alya said playfully. Adrien tugged at his collar nervously. "What is Marinette's favourite pop singer?"
Marinette thought for a moment. Her absolute favourite? Her eyes turned to the Jagged Stone poster on her wall, and she figured that she may as well pick her most popular fave and give Adrien a chance at getting any points at all. She really ought to take pity on him-even if he had tried to get to know her, she would have clammed up and been unable to make words.
At time's up, Adrien had just drawn an arrow. Everyone looked at him with varying levels of confusion, until he held up the board and angled it at the same poster Marinette has consulted when deciding who to write down.
"I cheated," he explained with an uncharacteristically cocky grin. "I saw her look at the poster before she wrote down her answer. Marinette, never play poker," he said the last part directly to Marinette, with an air of confidentiality.
She turned bright pink and laughed nervously. She had been getting used to him more and more the last few days, with him always draping his arm over her shoulders when Chloe glanced their direction, and the occasional offers to buy her things, but whenever he acted truly comfortable with her, she returned to her infantile fangirl state with just a blink.
"You get partial credit for using your environment to your advantage, dude," Nino decided, making something down on the notebook. "Marinette: What is Adrien's favourite colour?"
This wasn't something that was listed on his modeling portfolio online, nor did he ever mention it in casual conversation. He hadn't ever actually displayed his favourite colour for her to see, at least in any obvious way, so she'd have to guess.
Moments later, Adrien and Marinette both held up boards with the word 'green' hastily inscribed upon them.
"Tell me honestly, Marinette," Adrien began, squinting suspiciously at her. Her heart leapt to her throat. He was going to ask if she was stalking him, she would stand up to explain that she wasn't, and she'd trip and accidentally pull down the chart with his schedule on it. Their fake relationship would be over and he would hate her forever. "Are you a mind reader?" he asked, his suspicious face melting into a friendly smile.
She breathed out a sigh of relief, too audible to be natural, and pulled her face into a semblance of a smile. "I just guessed, honestly!" she insisted.
"Alright, next question. Adrien-" Alya began, but was cut off.
"I don't think we should play this game anymore," Adrien said, capping his pen and setting his board in his lap. "I know I don't know much about Marinette, but I think that would be better solved by just chatting with her," he explained. His mouth quirked oddly as he said 'chatting,' and for the life of her, Marinette could not figure out why.
"Aw, but I had like 30 more questions," Nino protested.
"Why don't we quiz them once we've given them an opportunity to know each other," Alya suggested.
"What, are we supposed to wait around while they give speeches about themselves?" Nino asked, looking bored at the very idea. "Listen, dude, I love you like a brother, but I am not invested enough in this arrangement to play chaperone on this playdate."
Adrien smiled. "I was thinking we could go get lunch."
Adrien decided not to take her to his same diner as he had last time. After the waiter's akuma fueled outburst, he didn't want to jinx things by going there twice. They say lightning never strikes the same place twice but, with his luck, he didn't want to test the theory. Instead, he had his driver take them to a cozy little cafe not far from his home. As a last minute gift for Nathalie's birthday, he'd once gotten her a cup of coffee and a muffin from the place, and as such, he remembered it fondly.
They sat by the window, across from one another. He smiled, and once again, Marinette looked as though she were casing the joint. Idly, he wondered if the reason she was so often late to school and complaining about late nights was that she was a burglar, but the thought passed as quickly as it came.
"I thought this might make up for our last lunch together," he said, smiling. "I hope that akuma villain didn't hurt you at all."
She smiled and looked up at him, as she always did, with pink cheeks and stars in her eyes. "I'm tougher than you think," she said, her smile growing.
In the past week they'd almost grown closer-she still stammered and stuttered and often tried to avoid talking to him at all, but she was a bit more comfortable, he hoped. He could tell that there was a part of her that he was being denied access to, and it drove him crazy thinking about. It was like there were two Marinettes: the one he took out to lunch sometimes and forced to hold his hand, and the one who protected the entire class from an attack by demented knights and ran for class president.
It was only fair that she got to have two identities, however, given that Adrien himself had an entirely different alter ego. But to think that Marinette could manage these twin identities as easily as himself, an actual superhero, was impressive to say the least.
"So it seems!" he said, chuckling to himself. "In any case, I'm really sorry things went so poorly. I haven't had an opportunity to actually bribe you yet, after all."
She waved it off. "It's not like you caused the akuma or anything! You're just a perfect gentleman."
"Yeah it's-hey, here's a first date type of question," Adrien began, eyeing her carefully. "Have you ever caused an akuma?"
Marinette looked toward the ceiling, deep in consideration. Her face was just too expressive to be real, Adrien thought. When she didn't know that he had eyes on her, she went through a huge range of emotions in just moments. He hoped she never had to lie; her face would give her away in a second.
"Maybe?" she said at last. "When Nathanael turned into the Evillustrator, it was somewhat based on his feelings for me."
"You can't blame yourself for that!" Adrien insisted. "That was all Chloe's teasing, not you!"
She shrugged. "I could understand feeling that badly about an unrequited crush," she admitted, looking away from him pointedly. It dawned on him then that she very likely liked someone else, which is why she was so uncomfortable around him. He suddenly felt very bad about trying so hard to get her to enjoy his company. He, too, understood the pain of unrequited pining.
"What about you, though?" she asked, trying to change the subject away from whomever she has a crush on. "Have you ever caused an akuma?"
He didn't have to think hard; it was a memory worthy of a cringe. "Yeah, actually. I once told a guy I was dating the girl he liked, kinda just to mess with him, and he went more than a little darkside," he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck.
Marinette began to laugh, drawing a confused look from Adrien. She was giggling into her hands, shaking as she tried (unsuccessfully) to contain her laughter.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she said between giggles. "But I just can't imagine you doing something so petty! It reminds me so much of another guy I know."
Adrien began to laugh too. "Well I'm glad to know I'm not the only one of your friends with questionable morals."
Her laughter started to die down as she smiled at him. "Trust me, you're so much better than him. Anyway, it's kindof a relief to know that you aren't...entirely perfect."
As soon as the words escaped her lips, she clamped her hands over her mouth. He was honestly stunned. Every time he talked to her outside of class, he learned something new about Marinette, but he still hadn't expected that she thought his ego was so big. Did he really give off the vibe that he thought he was perfect? No wonder his dad lectured him so often about his public image, he reflected, if he really came off like such a self righteous jerk.
He averted his eyes, his face falling for a moment, before he plastered on his typical, picture perfect smile, and scrambled to change the subject.
"Inviting you to lunch wasn't completely without motives," he admitted, pulling out his phone. Before he could say more, he saw her face seem to drain of colour completely, and her eyes widen. What had he done to make her so fearful of him? He tried to maintain a gentle and shy persona, if not just to confuse those who suspected he was Chat Noir, but to maintain his family's image. He pressed on anyway: "Chloe knows we're dating, but every day I still get awkward comments from fangirls who don't have the same class as us."
"Oh," she said quietly, but her colour did not come back into her face. "I don't think Chloe really believes we're dating."
He ran a hand through his hair in irritation. "I know, and she's the one we really have to trick," he admitted. "But I think I have an idea that should help both problems."
"What is it?" she asked with a furrowed brow.
He held out his phone. "We take a selfie together and post it to my official instagram," he said, smiling. "We make it look appropriately…" he paused, searching for a word that wouldn't make either of them cringe before settling on "Romantic and people will catch on. Plus, I think Chloe wouldn't imagine us announcing a fake relationship to hundreds of instagram followers if we were just doing it to trick her, right?"
Marinette stared at him, a smile growing on her face. "I should have known you were brilliant!" she said, before she clapped her hands over her mouth and turned tomato red. "I-I mean, that's just...just a pretty g-good idea!"
He smiled again, glad to have some measure of praise from someone who suffered so much from spending time with him.
"Come over here," he beckoned. "I'll take the picture."
Hesitantly, she got up out of her seat and walked over to him. Once she was at his side, he could practically feel the tension radiating from her body. He smiled up at her encouragingly, trying to communicate that he wasn't going to make a move on her or anything, but unwilling to actually express the thought.
He stood too, then, and pulled open Instagram to take a selfie. He had to bend down, just slightly, to make sure both their faces were in frame, but something about the pose wasn't doing it for him. Maybe it was his experience modeling, but he felt that the two of them just being in the same frame didn't communicate enough on its own. He contemplated how to fix this, and Marinette saw his mirrored expression on the screen of the phone.
"Is something wrong?" she asked, her voice trembling.
"It's nothing you're doing wrong!" he assured her. "The pose just looks unnatural," he mused aloud. "Maybe because it is."
With a Chat Noir like burst of inspiration, he sat down suddenly, and pulled Marinette into his lap by her waist. Just as she landed, he nuzzled into her hair and snapped the picture. She leapt up from his lap immediately, face burning red, and he smiled apologetically.
"Wh...buh...n…." she stammered out, not actually forming real words. With how bright she was blushing, it was likely that she was cooking her own brain from the heat of it.
"I'm sorry!" he said, but he couldn't help but smile at the steam practically rising from her ears. A small part of him wondered if he weren't already in love with Ladybug, would he be more interested in Marinette? She was adorable, everyone knew that, but seeing her flustered and so close to him was enough to make him want to mess with her forever.
"I..what...You…" she kept going, hands on her cheeks in (almost) wordless shock.
He held out his phone, showing her the picture that he'd managed to snap. Although very slightly blurry, the picture showed a surprised but smiling Marinette sitting on Adrien's lap, with his face partially obscured by her hair. While Marinette's big blue eyes were turned toward Adrien, which was something of a shame in his opinion-capturing those baby blues would have been a photographer's first instinct-but green eyes shone straight at the camera, his lips curled into a catlike smirk.
"It came out really good," he said lamely. "Can I post it?"
There was a pause where Marinette simply stared at the picture, looking aghast. After a moment, she nodded, still mute with surprise. Adrien smiled encouragingly at her, and gestured for her to take a seat, as they had still not eaten anything.
"I hope...it helps," she breathed, too awkward to raise her voice above a whisper.
"Hey, don't look so glum," he told her. "Order a drink, maybe some coffee? After all, I like the picture a-latte." He finished with the kind of smile that could only accompany a joke of that caliber.
She snorted, and he felt the same bubble of pride in his chest as when he'd made her giggle until she snorted in the limousine nearly a week ago. He would win his way to her friendship with bad jokes, or he wasn't half as funny as he thought he was.