...
And we kiss each other one more time
and sing this lie thats halfway mine
The sword is slicing through the question
so I wont be fooled by this angel light
..
Claire Speaks
Slowly I woke, not recognising the forest I was walking through, that we were walking through.
It felt as though I had been asleep for weeks, and more than likely I had been. The last thing I remembered was Nisroc mentioning something about Heaven and how I might not be able to stay awake through it; no sneak peaks for any human behind that curtain. For a while I had demanded I was sent home, the job was done, I wasnt needed by the Seraphim or God anymore yet here I was, still only a tourist on the sceneic bus route through the forest.
'Hey.' I said, not sure if Nisroc was in the talking mood
'Hello. We need to speak.'
'I'm all ears.' I sighed, knowing I didnt have much of a choice.
I stared out of my own eyes, wanting to look around the area but I was only able to watch and hear. It was night time, the sky overhead riddled with stars and I sighed, wishing I could look away.
'We interigated Zeno for days, asked what it was exactly he had done to the vessle and myself.'
'Did he talk?'
Nisroc was quiet and I apologised, rolling my eyes as Nisroc continued to walk.
'He informed us that he had fused us together, your soul to my grace.'
Nisroc was silent and I frowned, needing answers to such a statement.
'How is that even possible? How can we undo it?'
'It is an ancient artifact, lost millenia ago by the demons. It was created so they had some way of killing angels. It entwines the vessels soul with the angels grace until the soul is completly reliable on the grace and the angel now possesses the soul,'
'Making them easily killed.' I finished off, Nisroc nodding its head, her head, my head.
'But I'm still here, is that why I cannot see myself and why we can do...this?' I said, testing my strength and able to get my hand to hook a piece of hair around my ear. I smiled; such a task like that now left me weak.
'Yes. But because it is incomplete, you and I share the same soul, same body and same grace. If I ever manage to leave this vessle, you will die and myself also.'
It really is like your world shrinks on you. One minute your demanding answers and the next your begging that they take it back, that they never told you. It wasnt what I wanted to hear and I tried not to get angry; if this angel and I were to share a body and soul, there was no point blaming it. Yet it didnt feel like I was the one blaming; the angel was carrying around its own blame.
'It is my fault, I was too confident in myself. Now I am weak, and can never return home.'
To the side of the Throne, I could see its thoughts and I sighed, but there was something in there that I liked; now we could alternate who was in control, like a demon possessing a human, but I would bring that up later, right now Nisroc was coming to terms with its new life.
'But do not fear, Claire Novak, we still have an important mission.'
'Oh yeah? Whats that? Make sure we dont get seperated, ever?'
'We are charged to watch over Jesse Turner and Ben Braeden.'
I gasped, sensing that Nisroc was pleased with my suprise. I wanted to ask why they were so important to anyone but me, and in an instant the forest changed to a different scenery.
Adams house was hard to not recognise, but I was more focused on the two boys, the two men lying on the bonnet of a car; sharing a few drinks.
My heart sank in my chest; they seemed to be doing fine without me.
I wanted to run over there, to let them know I was still here but of course I couldnt, I wouldnt.
'They are mourning you.'
I wanted to scoff; wanted Nisroc to leave but I couldnt. Nisroc our hand, lifting the silver cross that was still around our neck.
'What will they do?'
'I cannot see the future, Claire, but I do know that these two will become something greatly important to the world, just as they are to you.'
I would have blushed, but I knew no one would see anyway. With a groan I turned back to see Jesse and Ben fall silent, staring up at the night sky.
'Will I ever see him again?'
Nisroc remained quiet for a minute, but regardless if she spoke or thought it, I would see it.
'Perhaps, I am sorry. Things will not be the same as they once were, I am sorry.'
'No your not. Dont even pretend; I can see your thoughts.'
'And I yours.'
I snarled; this whole sharing every thought and feeling was not going to be easy to get used to, but as Nisroc had pointed out before; we had all the time in the world to.
Maybe this was my punishment; God punishing me for being so selfish and denying the world and so many other lives over Ben. I wouldnt change a thing, well maybe a few but in the end everything had actually worked out how I wanted it.
Jesse and Ben slid of the bonnet of his car and headed to the patio, Ben lingering on the ground a while longer and I felt my hope rise that he would look over and see us but his head hung, lips moving in silent words before he joined Adam and Pearl on the chairs up near the house. Nisroc didnt move; we remained in the shadows, watching.
'Can we go?' I asked softly, not wanting to linger around any longer than usual. Nisroc nodded, and we began to walk, something I asked Nisroc to do more often than the whole flying thing.
'You know, Nisroc,' I said as we walked along the road.
'Yes Claire?'
I grinned as I felt the angel reading my thoughts.
'Because you are in my vessel, which is a female, maybe you should have a better name.'
'I am neither male nor female, I have no need for any other name than my own.'
I huffed, I would have pulled a face at the angel if we didnt share it.
'I was thinking, The Rock? But too manly, what about Sera? With you being a seraphim and all. And what do you mean you are neither male nor female? You are me now, and I dont have a thing between my legs.'
It felt almost as if the angel was embaressed and I laughed, decided that Nisroc was a ridiculous name for the angel.
'As you wish.' Sera said gently, looking up to the sky now with a soft smile. She spread her wings, vanishing from sight of the oncoming vehicles. I could feel everything; the wind on my face before the complete stillness and I closed my eyes, allowing to fall back into the numbness.
As much as I had feared and hated the angels for what happened to my family, I knew that this was going to be different, knowing that somehow, everything would work out.