CH 14 Muggle Music
Music credits at the end of this chapter. If you have never seen the Abbot and Costello skit "Who's on First" it is worthwhile to Google it before reading this chapter.
The end of January Jim Shook met with Harry. Jim was still in charge of the family security. "Harry," Jim said, "I am worried about the children when they go to music lessons. We have everything under control when they have individual lessons, but when they practice in their band I am worried that bad things could happen."
"Why?" Harry asked.
"They have to practice in a more public area, and more and more people are coming in and out. They are getting reasonably good for as young as they are. Remember, two of my children are in the band too."
"Rose takes piano lessons," Harry said. "Is she in the band?"
"Have you heard Rose play?" Jim asked.
"No," said Harry. "Is she any good?"
"I'm not sure there are any charitable ways to describe her playing," Jim said. "She hits all the notes, but she has no sense of rhythm, and the result is stilted at best. She does not like the Rock and Roll from the Fifties, Sixties and Seventies I grew up with and play. I corrupted my children with that music, and they have taught it to the rest of the band."
"The band could practice at our house," Harry said. "Are there Muggles in it?"
"Cal Glenbell is the other guitar player, in addition to Albus and our oldest, Sheryl. Our Christy plays the drums, and the bass player is Mac Paul.
"Mac Paul is a Muggle, and is probably the least talented in the group. Cal is a little out of place. He likes a softer type of song, but he can rock with the best of them."
Harry said, "We have what we call our Muggle Switch, a set of spells that changes the Drawing Room so it has the same furniture arrangement each time, keeps the pictures from moving, and has Muggle Repellent Spells on everything but the Living and Dining room on the Main Floor and the Drawing Room on the First Floor.
"Have the band practice in the Drawing Room."
A couple of weeks later Harry and Ginny were in the Drawing Room listening to the band during their normal Saturday practice session. It was the first time Ginny had heard the band.
"Is that Christy Shook?" Ginny asked as she saw the tiny girl attack the drums. Christy had long hair that she was constantly fussing with, and liked dresses that made her look even younger and smaller than she was. It's hard to sing a raucous song when all the voices are sopranos', but Christy was equal to the boys.
Ginny was very confused. She had never really listened to any Muggle Music, and this Muggle Rock and Roll had her totally baffled."
"Shake it up baby?" she asked. "You don't shake a baby!"
"I think the boy is telling his girlfriend to shake," Harry said.
"Why?" Ginny asked. "Twist and shout? What are they twisting?"
"I think they are twisting their bodies," Harry said.
"Like when you apparate?" Ginny asked. "Maybe they are shouting because they are splinching themselves."
"It is a Muggle song, Ginny. I am sure they are not referring to apparating."
"Work WHAT out?" Ginny asked.
"It," said Harry, laughing.
Ginny punched Harry in the shoulder. "That was NOT a helpful answer."
"What is a Beatle Tribute Band?" Ginny asked.
"A band that plays mostly Beatle songs," Harry said. "They are playing a lot more than just Beatle songs, although the Beatles covered 'Twist and Shout.'"
"Beatles, crickets, grasshoppers, they are insects, not band names."
"I don't know about grasshoppers, but the Beatles did name their band as a tribute to the Crickets."
"Now you really are kidding me, Harry," Ginny protested.
"Honestly, Buddy Holly, one of the early pioneers of Rock and Roll, had a band called the Crickets."
"Rock and Roll, like stones, like a rolling stone?" Ginny said.
"Oh, the Rolling Stones are a famous Rock and Roll band."
Ginny looked at Harry like he was crazy.
"Want to try a little Do-Wop?" Al asked the band. They started in singing.
Ginny looked at Harry. "Do wrap a diddy diddy dumb diddy dumb?"
"It's Wop, not wrap, Ginny."
"Well, I guess if you cannot wrap a diddy you might as well wop it," said Ginny, throwing her hands up in utter frustration. "I will never understand Muggle music. I guess I am just too dumb to know what a diddy is."
Then band had moved on to another song. Al sang to Christy, "The purpose of a man is to… love a woman."
Christy sang back, "And the purpose of a woman is to… love a man."
"I understand THOSE lyrics," Ginny said.
"Do they?" asked Harry.
Ginny looked at Al and Christy. "Merlin, I hope not!"
Sunday the family met as usual. Ginny told her mother, "I listened to Al practice his Muggle music and I just do not get it. Wrap a diddy dumb diddy dumb?"
"Oh, I like that song," Molly said. After you left Arthur got a recording player that works with the Muggle Electricity in this house. He repaired a lot of old Muggle plate like things, records. There are these little one song forty five records, and these thirty eight special big records.
"Muggles also record music on something like black Spellotape, called magic net tape. Too much magic ruins it. Arthur and a couple of others had to Oblivate a whole family, and in the process they ruined all the magic net tapes. They had to call in specialists from North America to fix them.
"Muggles also have music on seedy disks, but we cannot play them yet."
"Accio 'Do wah diddy diddy' single," Molly said. "You push this little round thing in the middle of this big round thing, and it pops up. You push it again and it stays down. No spells, just Muggle magic."
Molly played the "Do wah diddy diddy' record," bouncing around. "It is good exercise," Molly said. "One reason I've lost a little weight.
When the song was done Ginny said, "I just cannot believe the band names. Beatles and Crickets, Rolling Rocks."
"The Crickets are not British," Harry said.
"Who?" asked Arthur?
"Oh, they are British too. The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, and The Who, three of our British bands," said Molly.
"Who is the third British band?" asked Ginny.
"That's right, Ginny," said Molly.
"You haven't ANSWERED ME?" said Ginny, shouting at her mother. "WHO is the third British band?"
"You have just told me," Molly said, "WHY are you upset?"
"Because you haven't told me who the third British band is."
"I did tell you The Who is the third British band."
Harry had seen the famous "Who's on First' skit by Abbot and Costello on the telly, and he realized that something just like it was going on. He wondered if Hermione had ever seen it, so he said to Hermione, "Abbot and Costello."
Hermione got a look of recognition on her face, and said, "Who's on First?"
Harry said, "What's on second."
Hermione said, "I don't know."
Harry answered back, "Third base. Got It!"
"YOU ARE ALL CRAZY!" Ginny said.
"We're in trouble now," Harry said.
"I don't have to go home with her," Hermione said. "You explain."
By this time Ginny was red with anger and frustration, and all the family knew that an angry Ginny was a dangerous thing. All the children had disappeared, and Percy and Audrey were close to leaving.
"Do you have a record by 'The Who'?" asked Harry.
"Accio, 'The Who" records," Molly said. A number of disks came flying towards her hands."
Harry took one of the records, and pointed to the label. "The band is named "The Who," Ginny."
Ginny just looked at the label in disbelief. She said, "I thought Quidditch was dangerous. I don't know if I am going to survive Albus playing this rolling rock music." She looked at the record jacket again. "The Who!" Ginny sort of giggled. "I guess it was pretty funny."
Everyone breathed a sigh of relief.
Harry had never really wanted to be a farmer, or even a gardener. The house elves made sure there were house plants in the house, which was nice. Ginny didn't mind occasionally helping at the New Burrow property, but Harry avoided it when he could.
It was the spring of 2013, and Harry and Solon again had to work with the Longbottoms and the Weasleys on farm plans. Mostly Harry just had to make sure everybody did what Solon and Sojourner said It sure looked like 2013 was going to be more profitable than 2012. If the Weasley men farmers sometimes complained about all the changes, their wives were delighted that they had a little more money to spend, and that they would not have to live on the edge of poverty for the rest of their lives.
After one of Harry's meetings with Solon and Sojourner he asked, "Where is Kreacher? I do not think I have seen him in months."
Solon said, "Kreacher has not left the houses on Grimmauld Place in over six months. He is getting very old, and has to be taken places in a chair with wheels, or in a magic chair."
"Azalea?" asked Harry.
"Not so bad body, but mind not so good. Very hard on her to watch Kevin, but she will not let anyone else do," Solon said. "Very sad. Eves doing all they can. Best for Harry not to see or notice. Kreacher embarrassed."
Not trying to comfort Kreacher was hard for Harry, but he recognized that Solon was probably right.
Music Credits
'Twist and Shout' was written by the Americans Phil Medley and Bert Russell. It was originally recorded by the Top Notes, and then covered by The Isley Brothers. This author saw the Isley Brothers sing it. It was covered by The Beatles on their first album, Please Please Me.
'Do Wah Diddy Diddy' was written by two Americans, Jeff Barry and Ellie Greenwich. It was originally recorded by the American vocal group The Exciters. The most famous group to record it was the British group Manfred Mann, and their recording of it was #1 on both British and American pop charts.
"The purpose of a man is to love a woman' is from a song called 'Game of Love' by the British group Wayne Fontana & the Mindbenders.