It's Murder Sequel
Chapter 3
EPOV
My first thought when I saw Bella standing there in her towel, was "Thank God."
She looked like my Bella again.
I had been shocked at her appearance at my brother's wedding. She had lost weight that she definitely couldn't afford to lose, and her eyes had black lines under them, but it was her actual eyes that worried me the most.
The light had gone out of them.
She was Alice's lead bridesmaid and there was no chance in Hell that she was going to outshine the bride.
Esme had attempted to pin Bella's dress in because it was far too loose, and I'd suggested she free Bella's hair down from the ornate bun thing on her head that the hairdresser had done.
With her hair scooped up away from her face, her neck looked too fragile.
Her cheeks were sunken, and her dulled eyes looked enormous in her face.
She stood at her friends side through the service but I doubt she had any idea what was being said. She was using all her will and concentration just to remain upright.
Rose was the other attendant, and she moved from her assigned spot and stood half behind Bella, giving her physical and emotional support for the duration of the ceremony.
I could hardly concentrate on my Best Man duties, I was so shocked, and kept looking at her over Alice's head, wishing I could be the one at her side.
I just hadn't expected this.
We'd had a few screaming matches over the phone by then and I'd pictured her in my head looking the same as she always had, just maybe with a reddish purple hue to her face from all the yelling.
What the fuck had this done to her?
The punishment seemed excessive, even if the crime had warranted our reactions.
I never meant for this to happen.
Obviously we all had to ease up and get off her case.
Rose had called me the day before and told me to be prepared and not freak out when I saw Bella , but I'd misinterpreted what she was saying, and thought she meant don't get right into it the moment we faced one another.
Behave.
It's a wedding.
As a result, I'd been completely unprepared.
Bella had been nervous to face me that first time and tripped up twice just walking across the yard towards me.
Then she'd started to stutter out an apology and instead, burst into tears.
I was appalled at how shattered she was. I hadn't intended scaring the crap out of her...well, I had, but it wasn't likely she would be around another 'Palace of Pleasure' ever in her lifetime, so this had to stop.
She knew now what she'd done and she was truly sorry.
I put my arms around her shaking body and she stiffened.
I was so used to her melting against me whenever she had been in my arms, I wanted to cry myself.
For one horrible, unimaginable moment I thought all was lost.
I thought we were done.
Clearly she didn't need any more confirmation that things had fallen apart so completely, so I kissed the top of her head then smiled at her, hiding my despair and dismay at how she looked, and gently wiped the tears from her cheeks with my thumb.
"The bad stuff is all over now; in the past. We can start over again and move forward as soon as you feel up to it. This being apart crap isn't cutting it for me, we need to fix things, Bella. I want you back. I want us back."
She looked at me incredulously.
"Come on, we were made to be together. Nothing has changed that basic fact. We have some issue and they were serious , I admit, but you and I can get past them, together. Every relationship has it's teething troubles. I'm sure if we were not soul mates it may have been time to say Goodbye, but we are, Bella, so we have to fight for what we want.
We have to get through a photo session with the bridal party, then we are sneaking off to talk and resolve our differences so we can get back on track."
I took her inside so she could wash her face,which she did gingerly, trying not to ruin her make-up, and I kissed her.
God I had missed kissing her.
"Let's do this. Let's pretend like nothing happened and smile for the camera so we can get out of this place."
She was quiet and still shaky so I held her at my side as a couple of photos were taken of the group; I had a feeling Alice would be asking for a reshoot at a later date anyway, when her friend looked better.
Then we left the crowd and snuck away.
Bella sat down beside me in the little gazebo and I put my arms around her and told her things were not as bad as she thought.
She looked terrified, so I just said everything that was in my heart.
"I don't want us to break up over what happened. I told you that. I wish I'd handled things better.
God, Bella, I'm so scared that I've pushed you too far and lost you."
She clung onto my hand and looked up at me.
"You still want me?"
"Of course I do. No matter what you ever do, I will want always want to be with you. You are my Bella. I should never have left. I thought you were coping. I had no idea you were suffering this much. You have to eat. I'm going to go inside and get you a plate of food. Stay right here."
I'd been puzzled but relieved as she polished off everything I'd brought her, but that was apparently the way this stress thing went, she explained as she started to recover.
No appetite for weeks then someone would start shoving food down her throat and she'd start eating like there was no tomorrow. Charlie and Sue had broken the fast already.
In no time she'd be back to her former weight.
All the same, it made me realize Bella's health was more important than anything else.
We'd work out a way to get past the crap and find one another again.
xxxx
Raindrops hit the old metal roof with a sound similar to gunfire as I showered. The water in the cubicle competed with the rain outside and all in all, it was pretty deafening.
I liked it though, it let my mind clear and rest.
My body stirred as I washed it and I shook my head ruefully. If Bella hadn't sprung up and run this morning, we'd still be in that bed, enjoying one another's bodies, giving and taking until we were both spent.
She had done the right thing, I assured myself. We were not ready yet. It was pointless just jumping straight back into where we'd been before, because that place had not been perfect and we needed to be.
Then my mind drifted to last night.
As always, I recalled little. Just flashes. It was as if my brain needed to work through what might have happened but it still needed to protect my awake mind from the full horror.
My parents had worried a whole lot about my noisy nightmares, but finally Carlisle had concluded it was probably as good a way as any to come to terms with what had happened. By day I was on top of things and could push away the echo of fear I'd lived through, thinking Bella was possibly dead, or worse.
Night time was when the fear took charge.
Maybe I'd overreacted, I had considered numerous times. We had all walked away unscathed. Nothing bad had happened.
One doesn't rethink every car trip, wondering if we should have even gone on the road in case of an accident. There were dangers lurking everywhere, in everything we did.
Bella did a stupid thing but she was fine. She escaped without consequences.
I know I shouldn't have walked but on the other hand, walking away had been the short, sharp slap I wanted her to feel.
Then Dad had been forced to rush Bree into midnight surgery one night, and I'd known, no, Aro and his cohorts had indeed done things too despicable to contemplate to the girls he held captive and he probably would have gotten around to abusing Bella.
She could have been the one needing surgery.
Bad enough it was the fifteen year old girl in my parents care who did.
Bree's body was torn inside and had not been able to heal itself, so there was no other option than to operate and stitch things back into order.
Carlisle didn't think it would affect her fertility or ability to carry a pregnancy in the future, but time would tell..
If indeed, she ever did come to trust that this world was a suitable place for children.
I kind of hoped for boys, after seeing how some girls ended up, but Marcus had since informed me there had been young teen boys in another dungeon as well.
Riley was undergoing therapy, and had taken time off to run a bar instead of risking becoming immersed in another similar situation. There were plenty more 'Aro's' out there.
One would think running a bar was not the safest occupation either, but he felt more in control there, and was handling his life outside better than most had hoped, so they were stepping back.
I was so glad I'd not seen the things he'd seen.
My nights were bad enough.
I usually woke up with my bedsheets twisted around my body, or on the floor, and sometimes I was on the floor with them.
I knew I'd earned the sweat on my skin from physically fighting off the bad guy, and no prizes for guessing who he was. Always. It was always Aro.
Sometimes I was avenging Bella's death at his hands; other times the unspeakable things he had done to her.
Rose had managed to get her hired in a position of some safety and power, but things like that change on a dime. At any point he could have decided Bella was just the girl he needed in one of the even more terrifying dungeons, where a whole party of men paid for the services of a single girl. Not many of those girls came out of it alive, and even if they did, they were too damaged to remain an asset and were thus disposed of.
Or he could have decided she was just what he needed in his own playroom for his own enjoyment. God knew what sort of twisted pleasures he preferred himself.
Like Emmett, Bella had held a fanciful idea of what went on in those places, though I knew by the time we got her out she knew a lot more of the reality. But even so, she had still been working in the softest option dungeon. It would not have lasted. Aro would have realized he could get a lot more money for both her and Rose had he taken away their whips and stripped their bodies of their sexy little costumes and thrown them naked to the wolves.
I saw it over and over again in my sleep.
Rose had walked away relatively intact it seemed. Emmett said they were both coping okay and looking forward, not back. He was completely captivated by her and she by him, so we had that silver lining as well.
So all that needed to happen now was for the images in my mind to be erased and relieve me of the horrors it had concocted up.
Nothing had happened.
Bella had not been touched.
Why couldn't I just celebrate that actual fact and let go of the 'what ifs'?
It was over now.
Being apart from her had not helped at all. Breaking up was never the answer and not an option, anyway, and not what I intended.
I couldn't recall exactly what words I'd said to her but she knew it was not a Goodbye Forever situation. We both needed time, but we both knew we would get back together.
Together we had one anothers backs. God knows what would happen to her if I wasn't around.
I knew she had learned from her mistake.
And I needed her like I needed air.
This seemed like the ideal setting to start again.
Bella had to attend classes by day and although they were different classes to mine, I still would know where she was. Outside of class, we would be in the same building, hopefully in the same room much of the time.
Maybe she could sleep in here with me at nights and keep the bad dreams away. Just feeling the warmth of her body pressed up against my back had flipped a switch and left me sleeping like a baby, warm and safe and content.
My body needed hers even in slumber.
Marcus didn't necessarily know I was here, he had merely passed on to me all the relevant details of the case including this address, where Bella would be living. It had been simple to get voted in. A few suggestive smirks toward Jade when I 'accidentally' met her in the coffee shop on campus; an interest in Siobhan's pregnancy when she was at the local maternity clinic where I would be doing some behind the scenes shiftwork; buying a few rounds of drinks at the local club for the males in the house before the interview, and I was unanimously in.
They all recognised me immediately and I was 'that nice guy from the coffee shop/clinic/bar' and that's all it took.
I was everyone's best friend.
Carlisle had listened when I told him why buying this house would be a good investment. It was located near enough to several learning centers to ensure it would always be fully occupied by students. Now that Bella had moved in, I wanted to 'renovate'.
I'd shown a builder what needed to be done to convert the attic back to one big room, and the only problem was expanding the bathroom.
It pretty much could not be done without ripping everything out and starting again, and that would mean we couldn't live there while it was being refitted.
Instead, I decided to have a free standing clawfooted bathtub installed in one of the bay windows.
I already knew how much Bella loved bathtubs in the bedroom, so she would be delighted. I didn't need to discuss it first, but I did need to be very sure she was ready to share the attic room with me.
We didn't need to backpedal all the way back to the beginning, just take a few steps backwards and do things in the proper order.
We'd been so happy sharing her first tiny apartment and I felt strongly that going back to that type of cohabiting would revive our deep friendship, the foundations on which this relationship was based. But we could sleep together in the literal sense.
That meant while we may share a bed, there would not be sex.
Not immediately.
Well, not full sex.
Putting Bella in my bed and banning all forms of touching was never going to work.
I liked the idea of experiencing the acutely pleasurable anticipation of the day when we would consummate again, so I had no clear date in mind when it would happen.
We'd just know.
In the meanwhile, we'd get us back to where we were when things fell apart and this time, get it right.
Sunday we had explored the surrounding area, and gone to a open-air weekend produce and crafts market where she'd bought several boxes of fresh fruit and vegetables 'straight from the farm'; eggs so fresh they'd been under a chicken an hour ago, and a handmade poncho in all shades of purples for her Mom. Just because both of us lacked a spare hand to carry it, she'd put it on, and by the time we got home I knew Renee would not be getting it.
My hands were blue with cold when we got back to the car and Bella took them and tried to rub the blood back into them, then grinned and instead, put them inside that warm poncho, onto a pair of very cosy breasts.
"Honestly, Edward, you need to wear gloves. The circulation in your hands is pitiful."
"Funny, it feels amazing," I'd replied, rubbing them gently against her bare skin. Somehow they'd crept inside her clothing but nobody could see that because of the brightly coloured garment hiding what lay beneath from prying eyes.
"I like this pocho on you," I murmured and she laughed.
"I guess it has it's uses. I suppose we could come back next weekend and buy another one for Renee, seeing you are so attached to this one already."
Despite being in a parked car in a car park surrounded by people coming and going to and from the market, things had moved along, and I'd started kissing her.
Initially she'd pulled back and frowned, then she'd justified us kissing.
"I suppose this is like a first date and everyone kisses on first dates. The hands in the bra thing is just a medical issue, not us moving forward too quickly, right?"
"Considering I'm about to turn thirty one years old, I think our dates can be a little more adult than the usual new relationships," I replied.
"But no real sex?" she said wistfully.
"That's right, no real sex," I confirmed and her body sagged against mine in disappointment.
"One step at a time, my Bella. If you want to sleep over in my bed some nights, we can do that. We are adults and have some self control."
"Of course we do," she agreed, her eyes brightening up, no doubt realizing, actually, we had very little self control. "It's a pity they ever divided that attic. Think of what an amazing space it could be if they hadn't put up those stupid dividing walls."
"They are only temporary. It has just been done to create two bedrooms from one space to get an extra tennant in."
"Well, I hate them. I liked it when you stayed over in my little home back in the day," she sighed. "I liked arguing over coffee duty and listening to you sleep."
"Maybe we can do something about it," I murmured, lost in her aroma as I pushed my nose into her neck and let her hair cover me.
I mouthed her throat and she writhed and sighed, finally pushing me away.
"We should get back. Sorry, folks, the show is over," she grinned at several people who were looking our way. We'd attracted a little attention with our antics, but most were women looking on and possibly reminiscing about when they were college students.
Young love, is there anything better?
I actually hoped so. I hoped our love would have the chance to mature and grow and solidify into forever love.
xxxx
Jade frowned as we walked inside laughing at something silly, and Bella raised her eyebrows at me behind the girl's back.
"Hi Edward. I wondered where you'd gone so bright and early. I was about to head off to the gym. I was wondering if you were interested in coming with me. I'm a full member so I can take a guest for three months without them having to pay anything."
"I don't actually enjoy working out, so you would be wasting your free pass," I replied, walking to the kitchen to place my box of produce on the table next to Bella's.
"Actually, Bella and I had just decided to become running partners. I can't afford to sit around and get fat at my age, so she has convinced me we should partner up and run off an early morning when the air is all crisp and clean. I know you prefer sleeping in, so I knew you wouldn't want to run with me."
"That's true," she replied. "I find staying in my warm bed much more satisfying than freezing my arse off out in the cold air outside, until I'm forced to get up and face it. I guess you and Bella have nothing better to do of a morning than go for a run. It's great that you two are friends."
She was fishing again but the last thing I wanted to do was cause any problems within the house. Bella could not get kicked out and screw up another assignment.
"We are friends," I confirmed. "So, have fun at the gym and I'll see you later."
I hoped I didn't sound like I was leading her on. It was a tricky situation. I had zero interest in her, but it was necessary to keep her sweet. She may not be too pleased when she found out I was converting the attic back to a single room.
"Hey, I had an idea. My family has an on snow chalet in the ski lodge in Jiminy Peak. We should go there next weekend."
"That would be fun," Jade answered, putting her hand on my arm. "I have plenty of suitable outfits I want to wear. On the slopes and later, much later. Around a roaring fire, with a glass of brandy in my hand. Maybe on a bearskin rug. I'm sure you and I will have a great time."
"Bella loves to ski, and I bet Laurent and Benjamin and Alex would love to come with us as well. And Siobhan could watch us skiing from inside the cabin. We should all go," I added.
Jade pouted. "I guess. We would have our own bedroom, though?"
"There are enough bedrooms for everyone," I replied, ignoring her question. There was no 'we' and never would be, but how to convey that without causing problems?
I just wanted everyone out of the house so the builders could do their job and be gone by the time we returned. There was no reason for anyone else to ever venture uninvited up our staircase.
xxxx
The guys were enthusiastic when I announced our plans for the next weekend and that night Bella and I talked about what our behaviour would be towards one another in the chalet.
She was curled upon my bed, above the covers, and I didn't say anything.
Of course there would be times when one or the other of us were too wired to allow any skin contact, for various reasons.
If we were to remain chaste, we had to respect one another recognizing in themselves sometimes that 'right now, I would just not be able to stop if we so much as just kissed'.
Hopefully it would occur at different times so there would always be one of us still in control. If not, then this was not going to work.
I really wanted to rebuild our connection slowly, and strange as it might sound, I was eager to indulge in nothing more than petting. In my early relationships, that's all there had been. For me, petting brought back the times I was with a girl because I truly liked her and wanted to respect her, and it had been vastly different to the later randoms I'd taken to bed strictly to fuck.
With the latter I'd been so uncaring I could hardly look back now and bear acknowledging that that closed off, lust driven man had been me. I hadn't cared if they'd been ready or not, I'd just lubed them up and ploughed right in and done the deed; usually no kissing even had been involved.
Why pretend to have feelings when none were present?
But petting had been different, and had come after a period of time when each girl and I had only kissed and held hands. Then I'd been allowed access to soft breasts, and after a time, petting in the lower region, but it had only happened between girls I'd had feelings for.
Bella I cared about so much more than any of the others, so I wanted that period of time before I had full sex with her.
Sadly we couldn't go back to when we were both untouched and innocent, but I wished we could have. How much more meaningful would life be if we'd waited for one another? There was not one single relationship or encounter I would regret not experiencing, if we could turn back time and only truly know one another.
In our next lives, we would be smarter.
I had no doubts that we'd been made for one another and would find each other every reincarnation.
Next time we would get it right the first time.
But in this life, all we could do was make amends.
We'd take it slow, and not rush.
We'd be patient and neither would push for more until the other was ready.
It would be a natural progression and one night we would not want to stop, and we'd be back.
Stronger and better than before.
But that night was still a while away.
I wanted it to be very very special for us both, but how to ensure that?
I shook my head to clear the images away and got back into the present moment.
"We have to be strictly platonic in the chalet. No gazing into one another's eyes; no kissing,or disappearing together. I really need to convey to everyone in the house that I am not available and words aren't doing it, so I plan to use this opportunity to show them all that we are all just friends. No doubt someday in the future it will become obvious to everyone that you and I are together, but it has to happen in our own time so no need for any of them to get a heads up yet, in the meantime.
It's our business and most of them won't care anyway."
"It would be kind of nice to get back together and have nobody at all aware of that fact for a while. I feel a bit guilty of not letting your parents know you are not actually off chasing some new piece of skirt, mind you."
"It's their own fault," I replied. "You know if they knew we had found one another again, it would be 'so, is the engagement still on? When can we expect a wedding? Does this mean there will be the pitter patter of little feet coming along soon?'
We don't need that sort of pressure."
"You are right," she agreed.
I switched off my bedside light and Bella snuggled up closer, her head on my chest, and we both got a good nights sleep.
Somehow having her with me, reminding my brain even as it slept that she was safe and here; home with me, kept the nightmares away.
xxxx
BPOV
Edward took it upon himself to show me around campus and after I signed in and got my schedule, we parted, agreeing to meet up for lunch each day.
My classes were a little challenging to my surprise. Things had changed already since I'd finished my actual college years, so it wasn't the ride in the park I'd expected.
It was actually interesting to see the slant different professors put on old subjects.
I was glad to have some challenges while meeting new people and fitting in amongst them.
I had to make as many new friends as possible in order to one day be privy to hearing about who bought what drugs from whom, so I became Butterfly Bella, fluttering from one group to another, introducing myself.
The guys were mainly pretty friendly, but then, their main reason for being in college was to get their jollies with as many different girls as possible, so naturally they were welcoming. The girls less so. Some were hesitant if I'd been flirting with the object of their affection in front of them, so it was a tricky hand to play.
Friendly but not too friendly.
Flirty but not threatening.
Occasionally I confided in some of the girls that my heart was already taken by some mysterious stranger who didn't know I existed, so that warmed them to me. Nothing like a fellow female in the same boat, suffering through unrequited love, to bond us together.
Day by day my circle of friends increased and I become someone many of the students knew by sight, at least, so I managed to stand in while different groups chatted and they accepted me without thought. I was just one of hanger-oners of the group. Someone else's friend.
Nobody questioned my presence.
I was not to mention drugs at all in case it triggered interest and suspicion from the wrong sources, the dealers themselves. This assignment was to merely chat and listen and if any pertinent information came my way, pass it on.
It was a newbie assignment, my 'parole' for past indiscretions.
Edward and I were meeting up for a drink tonight at Biers Beers, and so at lunchtime I would be making sure he knew everything there was to know about me and my ex.
I didn't want anything getting stirred up again but I was not about to lie to Edward and keep any facts from him. If I didn't tell him Riley was living in 'our' apartment, and he found out by himself, he might be thrown,and start thinking things that were not true.
I'd blown it properly in the trust department, and he was trying to believe that I would never do anything that insane again, but he still had issues.
Just because I'd given him the benefit of the doubt that he could change his ways and settle down after years of man whoring did not mean I got a free pass. I'd been no better than him, in fact, I'd sort of let the men I'd been involved with assume there could be a future together by not making it plain from the beginning that I was just using them to fill in time.
The only thing Edward had done to me in a negative light was walk away, but strangely, I'd needed him to, or I'd never have processed the severity of what I'd done.
His walking had made it hit home just how reckless I'd been.
Had he simply forgiven me and put it behind us right away, who knows? Like a kid who never gets punished for their misdeeds, would I have taken it as permission to repeat my actions in a similar way again at a later date?
What I'd done needed to have consequences, and Edward had punished me in the only way he knew would hit home.
Still, like him, I'd been dismayed and terrified of how hard it was to simply function when we'd been apart. He'd admitted the same, and it reinforced our pledge to take things slowly and build nice strong permanent foundations.
Of course, while my brain agreed and merrily clapped our decision, my body hated it.
Every time we touched hands or kissed, it tried to takeover my brain and force itself closer to his body.
Some nights I managed to stay in complete control and be satisfied with just feeling his arms around me and his lips on the top of my head; other nights a simple Good night kiss on my lips sent trembles of lust pounding inside and I'd had to tell him I really needed a night alone in my own bed.
I considered buying a 'little plastic friend' but that only occurred to me too late when I was already tucked up, having had to flee back to my bed before I ripped Edward's blankets from his body and ravished him.
My sex dreams were back, in full cinematic technicolour. Sometimes they alone got me off as I dreamed of a naked Edward hovering above me, about to enter inside me.
Sometimes I got cheated and woke up as I started writhing around at his tender touch, only to open my eyes and realize he wasn't here with me, and I'd had to resort to touching myself.
I'd never been a fan.
When things got to this point in the past, I'd taken on a lover.
That was no longer an option.
Somehow Edward and I had to manage to take things so far and no further, seeing he'd put the sex ban in place. I had no doubts that our eventual consummation would be incredible and worth the period of abstinence, but tell me that late at night when I lay here alone with my body on fire because his lips on mine had ignited the flame.
xxxx
Edward didn't react at all when I explained about Riley. He seemed to think it was quite reasonable for the man to expect to be allowed to live in the apartment he had half paid for, in fact. Maybe because I wasn't currently living there myself he was able to see it logically.
"So, let's go formally introduce me to Riley Biers," he said as he opened the barroom door for me.
Riley kissed my cheek then turned his attention to my companion.
"Edward. I'm really pleased to meet you. Good work saving this one's arse at the castle. Honestly, she can be a firecracker in the worst possible way at times. I always had trouble keeping one step ahead and pulling her back from the edge of the cliff. She tends to do first and think later as you know."
"No blood no foul," Edward replied, refusing to get drawn back down that avenue of conversation. All I needed was Riley relating all my stuff ups when we'd been partners, in both senses. I'd been bad for him on both fronts, professionally and personally, I could acknowledge that now.
And then I'd slipped back to my old ways, with Edward and nearly killed us all.
"What are we drinking?" I interjected, needing to halt too many confidences being spilled and compared. I was trying to be a better person, for Edward. Looking back at my mistakes with Riley would not be helpful.
Several students from college saw me there over the next few hours so I occasionally excused myself and socialized, as my job required, but of course I panicked over what Riley was telling Edward in my absences.
On the way home, he eased my fears.
"Riley said you were a great girlfriend ninety nine per cent of the time and it was really hard for him to walk away. I know how he felt. I think it's different with us because I couldn't bring myself to stay away, like he could. I knew what we had was worth fighting for with every breath remaining in my body.
I know you wish we'd both done some things differently, and we have a second chance, Bella. I want it as much as you do. We are going to make it this time, I know it."
We were lost in a session of passionate kissing for the next hour or so back at the house, but we'd been smart and sat on the old sofa on the middle landing.
From there we'd have plenty of warning if any of the others left the tv room where they were watching Bond movies, and could quickly separate before anyone saw us.
It was getting harder to remain in control if we kissed this way in Edward's bed, so we did restrict ourselves to only indulging outside of a bedroom.
Like high school kids being wary in case a parent walked by, we kept things under control. Then we'd be heading up to our respective bedrooms for some 'cooling down alone time' before I crept into the other attic bedroom to sleep in Edward's bed with him.
Cooling down time was a polite way of saying finishing off alone ourselves what we had started together.
Then, of course, even the option of seeing to things myself flew out of the window when we got back from the ski break in his parents chalet, and guess what, the attic dividing walls were down.
Don't get me wrong, it was a wonderful surprise and something I'd wanted myself but there was one downside.
I no longer had the privacy to quench the fire he'd started.
The attic looked amazing, that was the upside. It was all freshly painted in snowy white, and the exposed rafters now looked more like a design feature than a necessity. There were egg shaped cane swinging chairs hanging from the beams nearest my back window, and beanbags tossed in the corner.
Both our old iron beds were gone, and instead we now had a king sized brass masterpiece to share. The mattress was twice as thick as the former had been, and the bed was covered with a heavily embroidered white on white brocade bed cover, topped with a white puffy continental quilt.
The walls no longer followed the roof line from floor level; now the bottom half was enclosed in, making half height closets to hang our clothes inside. The doors were pretty with those lovely decorative moldings usually seen on French Provincial armoires.
We had white wicker furniture, complete with hand sewn scatter cushions.
The bare bulbs in the ceiling were gone, replaced by two white candelabra style chandeliers.
The whole room gleamed white like an ice cave.
The floorboards had been stripped back and whitewashed to complete the look. I felt my toes curl in delight as I kicked my shoes off and waded through the brightly coloured shagpile floor rugs.
The only colour to the room apart from these rugs was the newly installed stained glass windows.
A large pink flower sat inside light green leaves, surrounded by arched black lines that broke up the glass into sections.
"Just a little reminder of your loft," he said with a smile. "Obviously I could only have the fixed side of the window done, seeing we have to open the other half at times."
"They are beautiful," I said in awe. I looked around the room,feeling the need to pinch myself and prove it was all real.
And then there was the bath tub, sitting snugly in the space created inside the bay window.
"Edward, you bought me a tub," I may have squealed in delight.
I turned and threw myself at him, my legs around his waist as I pecked his face with a hundred kisses.
He walked us to the bed and dropped me on top, then hovered above me, his knuckles white as he gripped the bedhead posts, breathing roughly.
"We have to behave," he said through gritted teeth, releasing the metal uprights to start pulling my clothes off my unresisting body and lifting me again to place me inside the covers.
His own clothes met a similar fate and he slid into bed beside me and reached for my breasts, his favourite toys. As his frenzied lips tore at my own, I pressed my needy body in closer and he slid a hand down to cover my mound then one single long finger invaded my folds and I writhed as he firmly traced small circles , faster and faster, exactly where I needed him to.
"Come for me, Baby," he begged, his voice rough and husky.
Of course he got me off in an instant and I flopped back down beside him, humming in delight.
"Too late with the dirty talk, I was already there. You do that so much better than I do. God, I needed that."
I felt my body ride out the aftershocks against his palm, then reached for him to return the favour.
I'd never enjoyed schoolyard petting so much before.
"No, it's okay," he said, taking my hand off his body and kissing my fingers.
"Come on, Edward. One good turn deserves another. Let me touch you."
"If you touch me like that, there's no way I'll be able to settle for a handjob. I can take care of myself later in the shower, like I normally do."
"But that's unfair," I moaned.
"How is it unfair? I satisfied your needs, now I can do the same for my own."
"You got to watch me come," I growled. "Why can't I watch you? We have usually been too focused on one another's eyes when we made love to watch the mechanics of getting off. I want to touch you and watch you come."
"Then I'll do it myself right here," he sighed, giving in. I wrapped my leg around his thigh so he could feel my core against him, riding him gently.
He was awkward and self conscious at first so I nipped his ear and licked his neck, always a turn on for Edward and he got into it and stroked himself harder. He shut his eyes, and tried to lose himself to the imminent pleasure, and I licked my thumb and leaned down, rubbing it gently over his tip and he lost it.
"Fuck me, I want you so much," he hissed as he came on the bed sheets.
I kept a layer of cloth between my hand and his erection and stroked gently until he was finished, then sat up to break the tension.
"Are you positive us sharing a bed is our best idea?" I checked, tucking my hair back behind my ears, then hugging my knees as I bent my legs up on the bed.
This was possibly the only way to keep them together. God knows my legs just wanted to sprawl apart and tempt him inside their apex. But Edward really felt it was a good idea to wait before resuming full sexual activities and I had to honour his wishes.
He grabbed a bottle of water from beside the bed and drank it down in one go.
"Maybe not. But we are useless apart and it's not like sleeping in the same bed is anything new. We can handle it."
Sure we could.
xxxx
My dreams that night were an entirely different version of events at the chalet, than what they'd been in reality.
Everyone in the limo Edward insisted on hiring to get us there, was shocked at the 'little chalet'. It was indeed 'on snow', not back with most of the others that were tucked away leaving a bit of a hike to get to where the actual skiing took place.
For us, we just opened a door and stepped out, right into the action. The ski lift was a few steps away from the front entrance.
Even I assumed the Cullen's just owned part of the building we entered; it could hardly be just for the one family,surely. It must contain apartments, I thought.
Wrong.
It was all theirs.
There were four enormous bedrooms upstairs with en suited bathrooms and sitting areas attached.
Then there were the usual library, music room, games room,and media rooms like every good weekend skiing chalet needed, I thought in amazement. Did this family even know how most of us lived?
Roughing it probably meant they had no butler.
I was kind of surprised now at the house they bought in Forks. Sure it was the largest and most expensive house there, but it wasn't so grand that you'd assume they also own properties like this one.
Downstairs there were two more bedrooms, plus a restaurant sized kitchen, and the sitting and dining rooms would look at home in the nearby resort.
The basement was one massive room full of pool and snooker tables , and all those table games boys liked to play. There was a bar in the corner, just so you didn't have to leave home to go mix with the commoners just to have a few drinks.
The far end was furnished with a collection of sofas surrounding an enormous wooden coffee table; somewhere for the females to sit and chat if they didn't want to join in and compete with the menfolk.
We walked back upstairs, mostly speechless.
Outside there were a series of garages housing a variety of vehicles. No doubt the jeep was Emmett's. There were enough snowmobiles for us all, and stacks of ski equipment in the last storage room.
We had a daily visit from both a housekeeper and a chef.
I saw Jade's eyes take everything in and they changed as she saw dollar signs.
"Why on Earth are you renting a room in a crappy little share house when you obviously could buy the whole town and live in your own gated estate?" she asked.
"This all belongs to my parents. I'm a student and I prefer to live like one," he replied. "I did buy the 'crappy little share house' mind you, so now you pay your rent to me."
Obviously the effect of knowing Edward Cullen came accompanied by endless funds just made him that much more attractive, and she pulled out all the stops.
Our host had showed us the bedrooms and suggested we choose which one each of us wanted and I'd deliberately chosen one of the two downstairs beside Siobhan's chosen room rather than one upstairs near Edward's.
That way there was no chance I'd be tempted to sneak in during the night. We'd only be here two nights; we could manage to sleep apart that long.
Edward came back downstairs looking harassed.
"What's up?" I asked, having checked nobody was around in hearing distance.
"I miscalculated. I automatically assumed you and I would share a room, without thinking. We are one bedroom short. I know Alex and Ben would be happy to bunk in together but Jade assumed she and I were sharing a room. I'm not experienced at the art of keeping unwanted attention at arm's length. I don't know how to handle it yet still keep her on side."
His solution had always been to just bite the bullet and get it over with immediately, in the distant past, then make it clear it had been a one night stand. Now he had to learn how to find another way.
"I even told her I am in love and she said she was sorry to hear that and maybe this weekend would be a good opportunity to test that. If I still love my soul mate by Sunday night when we leave, then so be it, but she wants me to give her a chance. I want to just tell her to go away but I don't want to wreck things at the house."
"Edward, most people have to learn how to let someone down tactfully when they are still in High School. Have you really never just said 'no'?"
" I had a constant stream of girlfriends one after the other in high school, then I was with Tanya. Nobody attempted to come between us. In college, girls quickly figured out I was single, and it was always easier to just..."
"Well then, your education in turning down unwanted offers begins now. Talk to her. Explain you only do monogamous and you would never cheat. She has to respect that."
"Do you think so?" he said worriedly.
"Well, I would also lock my door tonight," I replied with a grin.
She had been a little prickly after Edward sat her down and drew the line in the sand, but I could tell she had not given up the chase by any means.
She wandered from her suite draped in a towel, completely unnecessarily when her shower room was en suited off her bedroom.
I saw Benjamin looking her over and raising his eyebrows. From what I'd picked up, he was the only other male in the house she hadn't been with, and maybe he'd use this time to remedy that.
It would be a convenient solution.
Edward was sleeping in the bedroom his parents usually occupied, partly to have some distance so nobody would overhear his cries of distress if he had nightmares. It was situated away from the other upstairs bedrooms, and he loudly thanked the two men for agreeing to share the bunk room so the rest of us got separate boudoirs.
All the same, he was still jumpy and nervous and preferred us all being on the slopes where Jade could not monopolize him.
She fell down as often as I did, but while my falls were a natural result of having two left feet, hers were orchestrated to attract Edward's attention and she'd reach out to him pitifully for help each time she tumbled.
Finally I saw him confer with Ben, and that boy suddenly became Jade's constant companion.
"How much did you pay him?" I asked as Edward pulled me from a pile of snow and got me upright again.
"Never you mind. It was cheap compared to the hassle of having her bothering me."
He made sure he sat at the head of the table at meal times so nobody could sit beside him, and always occupied a recliner rather than a place on the sofa in the evenings.
Even so, Jade waited until he set off for bed himself both nights, so he still had to repeat his intentions to remain faithful to his mystery girlfriend twice more.
"She's a tenacious beast," he murmured in my ear the last morning we were there and Jade was busy selecting Edward's breakfast from the buffet on the sideboard.
Ben looked dejected,so apparently she had not decided to cut her losses and let him keep her warm at night.
It had been a whole new experience for Edward but he had coped.
xxxx
Edward had cooked dinner when we got back to the share house, and announced he was exhausted and was going to bed straight afterwards, and I followed him up as soon as Jade left to go visit a bar with the guys.
That's when I discovered what had been happening in our attic space.
We'd taken a step forwards, and I supposed it would only be a matter of time before somebody came up and found just the one door opening off the landing, now even the little shower room was incorporated into our room.
Someone would soon twig that we were living together.
Whatever.
We would not be the first pair of students to play house while living away from home.
Most nights Edward prepared me a post dinner bath. He knew the ingredients.
Lots of warm water.
Soapy bubbles.
One naked Edward.
We had to sit facing one another to both fit, so it was a chaste exercise in naked togetherness that we could handle.
Nights were becoming harder.
Even if we managed to sit side by side sipping our hot chocolate and talking about our day, then turning out the light and falling asleep with Edward spooning my body, it didn't last.
Long before morning we would awaken and desperately seek the other out.
Then it would be a frenzy of kissing and touching and trying to satisfy one another's needs without crossing the line.
Who knew avoiding sex was even possible in these circumstances?
I gave us both a mental gold star when we managed to stop short of the real thing, and it was kind of funny listening to Edward's heart trying to calm down again after a round of petting, and hearing his breath rasp.
I seemed to be the one with the more control, so that was interesting, because God knows I had not expected to be.
A/N Indicate if still reading, please. If we are all bored by now I can do the quick ending. I have 2 more chapters written but can tie everything up with one more chapter after those if nobody wants it dragged out longer.