A/N First of all, sorry for the lengthy delay between chapters. Secondly, big thanks to my beta, Gotta for all her help on this chapter! Thirdly, the words in italics reflect that characters thoughts. Hope you all enjoy and thanks for all the loving, you guys are the best!
Where the hell am I? I'm freezing cold and it's pitch black except for a tiny speck of light in the distance. I can hear voices and they're coming from the direction of the light. Jeez why am I so cold? I need to warm up or I'm going to freeze to death. Wait, why is the light getting closer and the voices getting louder? I haven't moved since I found myself in this black hole. The only logical explanation is that I'm dreaming.
"Oh my god, Ducky! Is Gibbs going to be okay?" Abby cried hysterically as Tony used his hands to stabilize Gibbs' neck while the two doctors assessed the leader's injuries.
Ziva arrived out of breath with a pile of blankets and Ducky's medical bag. Taking orders from the older man she strategically placed the blankets over Gibbs to buy him some time before hypothermia set in. Rifling through his medical bag, Ducky pulled out a package of smelling salts and cracked it open. With the sound of sirens approaching he waved it beneath Gibbs' nose, hoping the younger man would be conscious by the time the ambulance arrived.
What's that terrible smell? Whoa what's going on? It's not dark anymore but I'm having trouble focusing. Maybe if I blink my eyes a few times everything will be much clearer. Hmm I'm blinking but it doesn't seem to be helping. Oh wait, the faster I blink the better I can see. I'm confused, why is my entire team huddled around me and why does my head hurt so damn much?
As Ducky waved the smelling salts under Gibbs' nose, the entire team gathered around in anticipation. They were heartbroken when Maggie, Penny and Sarah drove away with Tim, but the situation escalated when Gibbs fainted and smacked his head on the curb. Watching as his eyelids fluttered they all breathed a collective sigh of relief when Gibbs' eyes popped open and he let out a small groan.
"Welcome back, Jethro."
Ducky could tell Gibbs was confused as to what had happened and squeezed his hand in reassurance. "Stay still my friend. You hit your head on the curb after you fainted. The ambulance is on the way."
Trying to nod and realizing he couldn't, Gibbs became agitated. Abby knelt down on the blanket and took his free hand. "Gibbs, try to stay calm. Tony is holding you still until we are certain you don't have a neck injury."
"Hey Boss." Tony said, maneuvering his body in a manner that allowed Gibbs to see him.
"Tim?" Gibbs' voice was raspy, practically a whisper as the team looked amongst themselves in sorrow.
Sighing, Ducky responded, "Let's take care of you first."
"No, I want to see Tim!" Gibbs bellowed, attempting to sit up.
"Jethro, please stay still. The extent of your injuries are unknown and you're only making it worse by fighting us."
Gibbs struggled against the three men who were holding him down, finally he grabbed hold of Ducky's jacket and looked at him pleadingly, "Where's my boy? Why can't I see him?"
"I'm sorry, Jethro. You can't see Timothy because the McGees took him with them back to their hotel. He's no longer here with us."
Gibbs' face crumpled and tears welled up in his eyes. "No, no, my Timmy can't be gone!"
"Clear some space, please. Can somebody tell us what happened here?"
A pair of paramedics along with the fire department made their way over with supplies including a backboard, stretcher and cervical collar. Jimmy, Abby and Ziva took a step back to allow the paramedics room to work.
"Uh yes my name is Dr. Mallard chief medical examiner for NCIS and this man's personal physician."
The paramedic nodded and crouched down next to Gibbs, "Sir, can you tell me your name?"
"Leave me alone. Let me die, I just want my Timmy back."
The young paramedic shot Ducky a worried look. The older man patted him on the back, "Agent Gibbs had a rough morning. Custody dispute gone wrong and he's having some short-term memory loss. He fainted and hit his head on the curb and doesn't remember that his son was taken away. We need to get him to the hospital right away."
"Poor guy." The paramedic responded sympathetically before turning to his partner, "Let's get Agent Gibbs' neck stabilized and on the backboard so we can get him off the cold ground."
"I told you to leave me alone." Gibbs responded gruffly and thrashed his body making it hard for the paramedics to securely fit the collar around his neck. Knowing his friend was not in his right mindset, Ducky asked everyone to give them some space. Tony wasn't about to remove his hands from Gibbs' neck but turned his head to give them the illusion they were alone.
Gibbs closed his eyes, hoping this was all a dream and Timmy was just in the house napping. The possibility his little boy was gone forever couldn't be true. As tears escaped the corner of his eyes he felt a warm hand suddenly clutch his hand.
"Jethro, open your eyes and look at me, please."
Slowly opening his eyes, Gibbs attempted to wipe the tears from his face but stopped when Ducky pulled out a tissue and dabbed the stray tears. Squeezing the younger man's hand tighter, Ducky made eye contact, "My dear friend, I know you're heartbroken that Timothy is gone. We're all sad but if that young man were here now he would want you to get help. If you lay here any longer you'll get hypothermia and frost bite. You're always telling me that you never leave a man behind and I play by your rules. I certainly don't intend on leaving you behind even if I have to sedate you to make it happen. Now are you ready to be civil and let the paramedics help or do you wish to do this the hard way?"
Taking a deep breath, Gibbs knew he had no choice but to follow orders from Ducky. He tried to nod but realized Tony still had hold of his neck. "I'll be civil if you can give me something for the pain."
"That's my boy." The older man responded motioning for the paramedics and firefighters to reconvene in front of their patient.
"Agent Gibbs is willing to cooperate now but he's in pain. Can we get him something before we load him up?"
The two paramedics exchanged glances before the one in charge spoke up, "Dr. Mallard normally we wait until we have the patient in the ambulance before we offer any pain relief."
Upon seeing the exasperated look on Ducky's face, the paramedics whispered amongst themselves before one of them ran back to the ambulance. "Is he allergic to anything?"
"No, not that I can recall." Ducky responded giving the young man a warm smile.
"Okay my partner is getting some morphine. In the meantime let's get this collar on to stabilize his neck and then we'll give him the shot before we put him on the back board."
Tony's hands shook as he relinquished control to the paramedic while the firefighters slipped the cervical collar around Gibbs' neck. The second paramedic returned from the ambulance with a syringe and with help from Ducky, pulled down the blankets and rolled up Gibbs' shirtsleeve. Cleaning the area with alcohol he said, "All right Agent Gibbs, I'm going to give you a little morphine, it should take the edge off until we can reach the hospital."
After slowly injecting the morphine they rolled Gibbs onto the backboard, secured him and carefully loaded him aboard the stretcher. The team huddled around, each giving their team leader some reassurance before the paramedics whisked him to the ambulance. Ducky followed the paramedics, barking out instructions for the others to lock up the house and meet them at Bethesda.
As Maggie drove away Tim continued to scream and cry, each gut-wrenching shriek louder than the last as he called out for his daddy. Sarah sat in back trying to console the toddler who had just been taken away from the only family he'd ever known. She couldn't believe how selfish her mom had been in taking Tim even though her brother obviously had a strong bond with Gibbs. As they stopped at a red light, Maggie turned around and attempted to comfort Tim, which only caused the youngster to scream louder.
"I hope you're happy, mom! How could you do this to Tim?" Sarah asked in between the little guy's sobs.
Maggie rolled her eyes and startled when the car behind them blared their horn, signaling that the light had turned green and it was their turn to go.
"Timothy is my son, Sarah. There was no way in hell I was going to let Agent Gibbs raise him. Why am I suddenly the bad guy in this whole situation?"
"You're the bad guy because you ripped Tim away from the only family he's ever known! He doesn't remember us and you selfishly decide the best idea is to take him away so you can raise him? The poor baby is terrified of all of us and you don't even care! How would you feel if you were in his position and were suddenly taken away from the people who had been taking care of you?
"Sarah, I'm his mother, his flesh and blood and now that Timothy is a baby again it is my responsibility to take care of him. He'll be upset for a while but once he gets used to us he'll be fine."
Penny's heart ached as her grandson screamed bloody murder in the back seat. She couldn't blame him; it was obvious he was confused as to why he was being taken away from his loved ones. While she understood Maggie's intentions, as convoluted as they were, she was upset with the way her former daughter-in-law ultimately carried out her plan. The best she could hope for now was that Maggie realized Tim would be happier with Gibbs and to provide comfort for him until that time came. Unfortunately the comfort would have to wait, as she had to finalize plans for John's funeral.
When they finally arrived back at the hotel, Tim continued to cry although it was obvious he was showing signs of tiring. Before Maggie could get to the back to unbuckle Tim, Sarah had gathered him in her arms and was bouncing him on her hip in an attempt to calm him down. When Maggie tried to take the toddler from her, she twisted her body making it impossible for her to reach him. Huffing, Sarah snarled, "After all you've put him through you don't deserve to hold him right now."
Maggie exchanged glances with Penny who only shrugged her shoulders and smirked, proud that Sarah was being so protective of her now younger brother. Grabbing Tim's supplies the two women proceeded to follow them into the hotel. While they stood waiting for the elevator, Sarah chuckled at Maggie's embarrassment as Tim's desperate cries for his daddy echoed through the lobby causing everyone in the vicinity to stare. Once the elevator doors slid open and they entered, Maggie breathed a sigh of relief as it ascended to their floor.
"I forgot what it's like to have an unhappy baby and everyone look at you like you're a bad parent because you can't keep your child happy."
When the elevator stopped and the doors opened to their floor, Sarah turned to Maggie and said, "You asked for it and now you got it. Tim was a perfectly happy baby with Agent Gibbs and now look what you've done."
Stepping off the elevator, Sarah dug the extra key out of her purse and unlocked the room, not bothering to hold the door for Maggie and Penny who trailed a few steps behind. Before the two older women entered the room, Sarah gave Tim a kiss on the cheek and whispered in his ear, "Don't worry, kiddo. I'll do my best to try and get you back to your daddy."
Tim looked up at her, the sincerity in her eyes made him realize he could trust her and that she would do her best to reunite him with his family. Giving her a slight nod between sobs he buried his face against her shoulder as she soothingly ran her hand up and down his back. She had watched Gibbs closely with Tim and realized that when the older man wanted to calm her brother down this was one of the tricks he used. Turning to see Maggie and Penny watching with looks of disbelief on their faces, she shrugged her shoulders and whispered, "I saw Agent Gibbs use this to calm Tim down so I figured I would try it."
Penny smiled warmly and rested her hand on Sarah's free shoulder, "Nice work my dear. You're still planning on coming with me to finish up the funeral arrangements though, right?"
Sarah was torn, as much as she would like to stay and comfort Tim she knew Penny also needed her support fulfilling the final arrangements for her father. Nodding, she whispered, "Let me get him settled and then we can go, okay?"
"Of course, sweetie. I have a few phone calls to make so I'll be in the other room if you need me."
Tim's sobbing had decreased to a quiet whimpering as he held on to Sarah for dear life. Maggie was busy unpacking Tim's supplies that Abby and Ziva had packed for him and was making a list of needed items to sustain them until she returned to Texas. As Sarah continued to rock and reassure her brother that he was safe, Tim expelled a small snuffle and relinquished the death grip he had around her neck. Unable to see his face, Sarah looked in the mirror and smiled as Tim's eyes drifted closed and he began snoring softly. Continuing to rock him until she was certain he was asleep she gently laid him down on the bed and carefully removed his coat. Giving him a kiss on the cheek she took the offered blanket from Maggie and covered him with it.
"You'll make an excellent mother someday Sarah."
Grabbing Maggie's arm, Sarah pulled her into the bathroom and closed the door.
"What's going on with you, Mom? You were at one point an excellent mother to both Tim and me. Now you're acting like a selfish bitch."
"You do not speak to me like that, Sarah!" Maggie raised her hand motioning for her to stop, but that only fueled the young woman's fire.
"It's my turn to speak, Mom. I understand this whole baby Timmy scenario has been a shock to all of us, but you're acting with disregard toward Tim's feelings. You think you know what's best when in reality you have no idea. What's Nick going to say about all this when you bring Tim back to Texas and instead of the two of you traveling, you have a baby to raise? I'm fairly certain that will be the end of your relationship."
Sighing, Maggie took a seat on the edge of the bathtub and ran her fingers through her hair, "Sarah, I love you and your brother and with your dad gone it's my job to make sure the two of you are taken care of. As far as Tim's feelings I think you're referring more to Agent Gibbs and the rest of his team. Once Tim realizes that I'm his caretaker his feelings will change. He bonded with Agent Gibbs so who's not to say he'll bond with me too? Yes, my life has abruptly changed and if Nick doesn't want to be a part of it after I return then that's his loss. As a parent I'm willing to make sacrifices for my kids and I would appreciate a little more support from you going forward."
Chuckling, Sarah replied, "I think you're going to be in way over your head. Once you go back to Texas you'll be a single mom and forced to deal with the little guy all by yourself."
Maggie scoffed, "I'm not worried, are you forgetting that I was practically a single mom while your dad was serving our country? This isn't my first rodeo and I intend to give Tim the childhood he deserves."
Sarah swallowed past the sudden lump in her throat as tears welled up in her eyes. Sniffling, she took a deep breath, trying to control her emotions. Maggie reached out and took her hand, "What is it honey?"
"Tim deserves a childhood with a loving father. You did the best you could with both of us, but Tim never had that strong paternal figure to look up to. Now he's being given that opportunity and you don't even want to consider it."
Suddenly there was a quiet knock on the door and Sarah wiped the remaining tears from her eyes before opening it.
"I see you were able to get Timothy to sleep. Are you ready to go dear?"
"Yeah, Penny. Let me get my coat and we can go."
Following them into the room, Maggie quickly jotted down a few more items she needed for Tim and cleared her throat, "While you two are out could you pick up these things for my little guy?"
Snatching the list from her, Sarah tucked it in her purse and said, "We'll pick up the stuff, but I want you to know I'm doing it for Tim not for you."
Penny opened the door, holding it for Sarah who instead of closing it quietly let it slam shut. When she heard Tim wail, she smiled, hoping that by the time they returned her mom would realize how hard it was going to be taking care of a toddler again.
Once the ambulance arrived at Bethesda, Gibbs was rushed off to one of the trauma bays with Ducky hot on his heels. As the paramedics guided the stretcher into the room a middle-aged doctor took over and began giving orders to the nurses and orderlies who had gathered to help. As they began to examine Gibbs a nurse stepped forward and grabbed Ducky's arm, "I'm sorry sir you're going to have to wait outside while Dr. Phillips examines him."
Crossing his arms across his chest, Ducky scooted closer to Gibbs, "I'm not leaving. My name is Dr. Mallard and I'm the chief medical examiner for NCIS and Agent Gibbs' personal physician. I saw firsthand what happened and can answer any questions that may arise."
Dr. Phillips nodded and motioned to the chair in the corner of the room. "The paramedics gave us a brief summary of what happened but perhaps you could enlighten me."
"Certainly doctor, Agent Gibbs had just received some terrible news and right before our eyes he collapsed and hit his head on the curb. Unfortunately we were unable to prevent him from falling as we were a few hundred feet away."
The doctor nodded, gently laid his hand on Gibbs chest and crouched down to make eye contact. "Agent Gibbs I understand the paramedics gave you some morphine for the pain, are you comfortable?"
"Oh yeeaaah doc. I feeeelll greaaat." Gibbs' response was slurred and drawn out, no doubt a side effect of the pain medication.
Dr. Phillips squeezed his shoulder in reassurance, "We're going to take good care of you, Agent Gibbs. Let me know if something we do or touch makes you feel uncomfortable or is painful."
"Tiiimmmmy?"
Ducky stood up, found a spot next to the stretcher and took Gibbs' hand, "Jethro, do you remember how I told you that Timothy is now with the McGees?"
As the pacing on the heart monitor increased, Dr. Phillips pulled Ducky aside and asked, "Who's Timmy and why is talking about him causing Agent Gibbs' heart rate to increase?"
Looking over at his friend, Ducky replied solemnly, "Timmy is Agent Gibbs' son and he lost him in a custody dispute this morning. That is what caused him to faint and when he was finally conscious he didn't remember the lad was gone."
Dr. Phillips nodded, "I see, well that makes sense. I couldn't imagine losing one of my kids. I've ordered an X-Ray of his neck and spine and also a CAT scan to rule out any injuries to his brain. It's possible he has a concussion and that contributed to his memory loss or the trauma of losing his son has affected his memory. I'll know more after the tests and will be able to make a proper diagnosis. He's stable right now and will need some stitches to close the wound on the side of his head. Why don't you go grab a drink and take a break and I'll come find you once we're done."
Ducky nodded and shook the doctor's hand, "I appreciate that and please take good care of Jethro. I'm afraid he's in denial and these next few days, weeks, months, years will be tough on him."
"I assure you all of us here will take good care of him Dr. Mallard. Why don't you let him know you're taking a break while we finish up here."
Returning to his spot beside the bed, Ducky once again grabbed hold of Gibbs' hand and squeezed, "Jethro, Dr. Phillips needs to run some more tests and I'm going to step outside to find the rest of the team. We'll be back to see you once you get cleaned up and are allowed to have visitors."
Gibbs was having a difficult time keeping his eyes open as the medication and stress of the day was taking its toll on him. Briefly opening his eyes, he mumbled, "Want Timmy." Before they slid shut again.
"I know you do, but it's best that you get some rest right now." Patting Gibbs' hand, Ducky slipped out of the room to find the rest of the team.
Stepping outside the door he took a deep breath and ran his fingers through his hair. He'd never seen Gibbs so emotional before and knew the younger man had a long road ahead of him. Of course he hadn't known him when Shannon and Kelly were killed and shuddered at the thought of losing not only your wife but child as well. Losing Tim was going to open up all those old wounds along with a variety of new ones.
"Ducky, Ducky, Ducky!" Abby cried as she clomped down the hallway and launched herself into the older man's arms.
Tony, Ziva and Jimmy followed, eager to hear an update on their leader's condition. When Abby finally relinquished her grip around Ducky's neck he gave Ziva a quick hug and both guys a pat on the back.
"I want to give you an update on Jethro's condition, but first I want to say how proud I am of each of you with how you handled the situation earlier. Let's find the cafeteria and grab a hot beverage while they continue running tests."
As the door slammed shut and Tim began wailing, Maggie was tempted to run after Sarah and force her to console her brother. However, she thought twice about it knowing her daughter was attempting to make a point regarding her mothering abilities. Taking a deep breath she turned to face Tim who was sitting in the middle of the bed crying for Gibbs. Quietly approaching him, she reached down to pick him up and was startled when Tim sank his few tiny baby teeth into her arm.
"You little shit!" Maggie exclaimed, examining her arm and the indentation Tim's teeth left.
Don touchie wady! U took me awah fwom muh dada!
"Timothy, biting is not nice!" She admonished him as she rubbed her arm trying to get rid of the stinging sensation.
Tim stuck his tongue out at her and starting crawling toward the head of the bed. Picking the toddler up once more, Maggie held him at arm's length as he thrashed and screamed trying desperately to get away from her. Noticing Tim's diaper had leaked through to his jeans she clucked her tongue and deposited him on the floor. Reaching for the diaper bag, she pulled out the changing mat, a clean diaper, new pants and a package of wipes. Remembering what Tony said about the youngster not allowing anyone else to change him besides a select few she knew she needed a distraction. Rifling through the bag, looking for the extra bottles of milk she'd watched Ziva pack, she said, "Aww sweetie, I wish you remembered me. I was your mom for over thirty years and took good care of you. I guess it's going to take some time until you trust me. Do you want a bottle?"
During the time her attention was diverted, Tim had managed to crawl clear across the room, picked up a small shiny object and was in the process of putting it in his mouth.
"No Tim!" Maggie shouted as she jumped up, hurried across the room and pried the toddler's mouth open. Tim screamed as she fished around desperate to find the tiny object. Finally able to get two fingers on it she pulled it out and sank down onto the floor. Her hand shook as she held up the shiny dime, "You trying to give me a heart attack, Timothy? C'mon let's get you some milk while I change you out of these wet clothes."
Sticking his thumb in his mouth, Tim fought her as she carried him back over to the changing mat and lay him down. Keeping one hand on his stomach as he cried and kicked his legs, Maggie used her free hand to pop the bottle in the microwave and warm it up. Once it was done she removed it and dabbed a bit on her hand making sure it wasn't too hot. All the crying and screaming had made Tim extremely thirsty so when the bottle appeared he removed his thumb and settled down a bit.
"There's my sweet angel. See mommy knows what her Timmy needs." Maggie cooed, guiding the nipple of the bottle between his lips. Once Tim had gained control over it she unbuttoned his jeans and slowly slid them down his legs. Tim struggled against her, but in the end was no match for her strength. He whimpered as she unfastened the sodden diaper and as she started wiping him clean he released a stream of pee hitting her square in the face. Sputtering in disgust as the urine dripped down her face and onto her shirt and pants, Maggie attempted to cover him with the diaper but by that time he was already done. Tim's giggling turned into a full blown belly laugh as she grabbed a baby wipe and cleansed her face.
Dada be pwoud of me!
"You did that on purpose you little brat! Stop laughing it's not funny!"
Maggie's screaming terrified Tim enough that he stopped laughing and started crying. Reeling in the aftermath of the shower she'd just received, Maggie didn't care that she'd made Tim cry and quickly finished changing his diaper. Following that with a clean pair of pants for him, she left Tim lying on the floor while she stepped into the bathroom to assess the damage. The front of her shirt and pants were soaked and she figured Tim's bladder was full by the amount of urine collected on them. Her face was sticky from the baby wipes and she shuddered at the fact she'd probably gotten some pee in her mouth. Looking in the mirror she muttered to herself, "When did babies become so difficult to care for? They depend on you for everything and need your attention every second of every day. How the hell did I deal with it thirty years ago?"
Washing her face with soap and water she returned to the main room just as Tim was pulling himself up using the back of a wobbly chair. Since he was still unsteady on his feet the chair was supporting a majority of his weight. As he gripped tighter the chair toppled backwards, taking Tim with it as they both tumbled to the floor. Luckily the chair had fallen to the side and not on top of the little guy as he burst into tears, each heart wrenching sob a plea for his daddy. Maggie sighed as she rushed over and struggled to console him. Tim fought her; kicking, hitting, biting, anything he could do to get her away from him. Throwing her hands up in frustration she retrieved his half drunken bottle from the floor and handed it to him. Inserting the nipple in his mouth, he quieted almost immediately as the warm creamy liquid caressed his raw throat.
Maggie watched him intently and sighed, "I don't know what I'm going to do with you Timothy. I take my eyes of you for one moment and you're into everything. I need to find a pen to corral..."
Smiling, she walked over to the phone and called down to the front desk requesting a travel crib and playpen. With Tim contentedly sucking on his bottle, Maggie propped the door open a crack to allow the hotel staff to enter with the furniture. Realizing her clothes were still soaked she ducked into the second bedroom to change and clean up. A few minutes later there was a knock on the door and Maggie was excited to see two bellhops entering with a crib. Happy that she'd figured out a plan to keep the youngster more contained she held the door open for them. Suddenly realizing Tim was nowhere to be found she went into panic mode, shrieking loudly and frantically looking everywhere for him.