"Addiction isn't about substance - you aren't addicted to the substance, you are addicted to the alteration of mood that the substance brings."
~Susan Cheever
Spencer unlocked his hotel door and pushed it open, revealing a standard decorated room that resembled nearly every other hotel they stayed at while on cases. Reaching back, Spencer grabbed his suit case and dragged it into the room, shutting the door behind him. It was quiet save for the low hum of the air conditioning going to work. Thank God for that too. It was deadly hot in Phoenix, especially at this time of year.
Spencer opened the curtains to reveal the dark skies in contrast with the city lights of the capitol of Arizona. He was high up enough for the sound of the traffic below not to bother him, but he did however like the quiet murmur of the outside noises. He never liked it being completely silent.
Before he could even sit down, there was a soft knock at his door. Spencer yawned and smiled a bit while rushing to get the door. He unlocked the latch and pulled it open revealing Evie standing outside in the hallway, looking as tired as he probably did. Whenever they checked into hotels for cases, Hotch would get enough for everyone to have their own, including Evie and Spencer. It was just more professional that way, but even though the team all knew that Evie and Spence ended up sharing a room anyway in the end, no one really acknowledged it.
"Hey." she said sleepily, rocking up on her tiptoes to kiss Spencer on the cheek before walking past him into the room. He smiled and shut the door behind her, following Evelyn to where she sat on the bed and laid her pajamas out next to her. He assumed the rest of her suitcase was back in her room. That's how they'd usually set things up, anyway.
She didn't hesitate for one second to start pulling her work blouse over her head, careful not to catch her ponytail on the zipper on the back. Spencer's breath never failed to falter when she started undressing. The bones and muscles underneath her skin moved perfectly with her body and he found himself wanting nothing more than to kiss her all over.
Caught up in his own thoughts, Spencer didn't realize that she had taken notice of his not-so-subtle staring. She had an amused smile on her face as she watched him finally acknowledge that she stopped.
Without a word she stood up and took a step towards Spencer, closing the distance between them in the small hotel room. Her small, fragile arms wrapped around his waist and pulled him against her body. Reid returned the notion, securing her in his arms and kissing the top of her head before resting his chin on top of it. He breathed in the scent of her shampoo and she nuzzled his neck while embracing him tightly. Sometimes he still couldn't believe this girl was his. The probability was little to nothing in his mind, and yet she loved him for some reason.
"I love you." he whispered while running his fingers gently over her bare back, skipping over her bra strap and traveling up and down in a consistent pattern.
Instead of answering, Evie looked up at him and raised herself on her tip toes so her lips could reach his own. She very gently kissed him, hardly even grazing her lips against his. Spencer closed his eyes and felt the familiar sense of warmth and excitement mixed with... a hint of sadness? Why did this make him feel so melancholy? Something wasn't right. He could feel a sense of a rising sensation of grief almost. Spencer couldn't quiet think of why that was.
Meanwhile, Evie continued in kissing him a bit harder this time, Reid forgetting the odd feeling he had at the pit of his stomach while kissing her back. He raised a hand to run it through her hair, carefully sliding off her hairband as he did, letting Evie's slightly curled brown hair cascade down the skin of her back. Their kissing intensified and it wasn't long before their was tongue involved. A fire igniting in Spence's stomach, replacing that mysterious aching feeling. He ran his hands down to the tips of her hair until he pressed a hand to the small of her back and grasped her hip with the other, yanking her hard against him and making her gasp. He watched her close her eyes and bite her lip. He loved when she did that.
Sliding his hands down to the back of her thighs, he lifted her so that her legs were wrapped around his waist tightly, pulling their two bodies even closer together. She instinctively snaked her arms around his neck, not hesitated to return her lips to his while gently massaging their tongues together.
Reid carried her to the side of the bed and laid her down gently. Before he did anything else, he let his hand slide of her stomach until he reached the button of her pants. She pulled in a sharp breath and looked at Spencer with wanting eyes, giving him all the permission he needed. He undid the button and very slowly unzipped the zipper. He felt her eyes on him as he slid the pants over hips and down her legs until she was just left in her bra and underwear.
Spencer moved on top of her so that he was kneeling with a knee on either side of her hips. Reid bent down to resume kissing Evie while unbuttoning his shirt as fast as he could. He felt Evie's hands working on the button of his pants and soon he was left only in his boxers. Not taking his sweet time anymore, Spencer lied flush against her, pulling her legs up around his waist and pushing his hips into hers, causing Evie to grip the sheets at her sides and moan. He loved ending a hard work day with this.
Spencer's eyes fluttered open. He was lying on a hard surface that was uneven and pressing uncomfortably into his back. A cold wind blew around him and created a low, lonely whistling sound. It was dark and before Reid's eyes could adjust, he had a small panicking moment when he realized he didn't know where he was. He sat up with a start and heard a small clink sound like something small had just fallen to the floor. Spencer looked on the ground next to him and saw the gleam of the syringe that must have fallen off his lap when he sat up. This brought all of his memory back to him.
It was about 3 am when Spencer had slipped out of JJ's house with a vial of Dilaudid and a syringe closed in his fist. Upon leaving his apartment, he had buried it in the deepest, most hidden pocket of his suitcase that he could. Two days ago was the first time he sneaked out and found the small abandoned wooden fort that he was sitting in now. It was on the outskirts of the woods surrounding JJ's neighborhood and was falling apart around him; a perfect place for him to escape to however. He hated himself for it. Evie would be so, so disappointed in him for sinking back into the drug scene. It was the only way he could see her, though. Every injection brought a new memory and if that's all he could get, than he'd take it.
It had been around a week since Evie died... he thought. Time all melded together lately. Ever since people started to try to talk to Spencer about what to do with Evie's things and if he wanted to bury some part of her, he had shut down even more than he had before. Sometimes he was just completely numb, not even able to move. He felt nothing. He was just an empty shell. Other times, it felt like knives were twisting into his chest. He would grip the shirt over his chest tightly as if it'd help against the pain as his body heaved with something between sobs and gasps of torment. Every single waking moment he had wished JJ and Hotch had never found him before he had died that afternoon.
Sighing and pushing himself up, Spencer snatched up his syringe and felt around on the ground until he found the small container of Dilaudid. He found the old deteriorated shoe box some kid must've left here years ago, and hid his drugs inside. Pulling he coat tighter around his body and crossing his arms against the cold, Spencer ducked under the opening of the rickety fort and carried on into the cold, biting wind back towards JJ's house.
The truck hit another bump, sending Evie flying into the air and slamming her back down again. It wasn't exactly the ideal place to sleep but that's all she had done lately. If she wasn't sleeping, she was lying still and thinking; thinking about her life she was leaving behind, thinking of what was ahead, thinking of Spencer and how much she missed him.
Evie opened her eyes groggily to see Batra staring at her from the other side of the truck. He did that a lot lately: just stared at her with a blank expression. She didn't care to talk to him, not since he botched their chance at escaping a day ago. She couldn't be mad exactly, not when she understood how much pain he must be going through. Still though, she wasn't in the mood for talking. Not to mention they still had their own guard sleeping ten feet away from them, leaned up against on the of crates. Evie looked at him in disgust. He held his gun loosely in his hands so that it was constantly bouncing up and down on his lap with every bump they hit on the road.
Evie's eyes wandered over to her leather skinned water pouch. Batra had one too. They refilled it for them twice so far, but it was never enough. She had drunken hers dry about an hour ago, but still she was parched.
Evelyn sighed and closed her eyes again. She felt the lump rising in her throat but forced it back down. She wouldn't cry. Not now when she needed herself to be held together most.
Slipping back into sleep, Evie thought of things to try to make herself happy like what her and Spencer's wedding will be like and how beautiful their children will be. With that in mind she found just a bit of peace to let herself drift again.
Before she knew it however, there was a hand shaking her awake. Evie jumped at the sudden and unexpected contact, expecting another one of the guards to be trying to force her awake so they could smuggle her into a run down pit stop bathroom like they did a few hours ago. It wasn't a guard, however. Once the haziness of Evie's vision cleared, Hani's face appeared five inches from hers, his face more afraid and alert than she's ever seen it.
"You must go now!" he whispered shrilly in her ear. Evie was only partly awake and fully confused as he told her this. It took a while to process what he was saying.
"What... why?" she asked in a voice just barely above whispering.
"Shh!" he shushed her, glancing over at the sleeping guard. Evie followed his gaze to see that he was indeed still sleeping. Hani turned his attention back to Evie with eyes as big as saucers.
"You must go now!" he repeated, taking Evie's arm and pulling her towards the giant door of the back of the truck so that she stumbled to walk on her knees to keep up with him. The truck was still on bumpy terrain, a few big jumps threatening to nearly knock Evie down. Batra was consistent in dragging her forwards until they made it to the latch that opened the door. There was a strap tied around it, tied so that it was sealed with a lock at the bottom so they couldn't get out. Evie watched Batra start fishing in his pocket for something, occasionally glancing back at the sleeping man only 15 feet away from them.
"Hani, are you crazy? What are you talking about?" she whispered, frowning at Batra while watching his efforts to find something. He pulled out a black handled object that he enclosed in his fist. He flicked his hand forward and a gleaming blade shot out. A knife? How had he gotten a knife?
"Hani..." Evie whispered in pure confusing but amazement. He ignored her and immediately began sawing away at the strap holding the door down. Evie kept looking back and forth from Hani and the man sleeping with the gun next to them, her eyes wide. She didn't even know what to think.
It did seem that whatever plan Batra had, it was working. The knife was almost halfway through the strap, Hani not faltering one bit.
"Are we escaping?" Evie asked, a gleam of fear and hope in her voice. Batra glanced up at her with big brown eyes for a split second before returning to his work.
"You are." he said. Evie felt her heart sink.
"You're not coming with me?"
Batra was silent.
"Why?"
Snap! The rope was cut loose and Hani pulled it off the latch. Evie watched in surprise. Was this his plan the whole time?
He reached over to where he was previously sitting and grabbed his water pouch by the strap, dragging it over to where they knelt. Hani shook it a few times, seeming to check how much water was left before thrusting it into Evie's hands. She looked down at the water pouch and then back at Batra who was putting away the knife.
"Where the hell did you get the knife?"
"His pocket, now shush. Do not wake him."
Batra looked over at the guard one last time before he carefully grasped the handle of the latch in his hands, ready to turn it and throw the door open. His eyes found Evie's and he frowned at her through his bushy eyebrows.
"You're going to need to jump. Just tuck and roll your body when you hit the ground. We are somewhere in Virginia, this is the closest I could get you." he whispered so quietly that Evie could barely hear him over the hum of the truck.
"I-"
"You need to run. Don't come back, not for me, not for any reason." he interrupted, not letting her protest.
"But Hani-"
"GO!" he boomed, twisting the handle and throwing the door up so that they were hit with a wall of cold air and wind. The scene before them was woods all around, surrounding a small run down dirt road that they were traveling on. There was no sign of civilization anywhere, just miles of trees.
The abruptness of the situation in general made Evie freeze just in time to see the guard's eyes fly open, alarm written all over his face. Her mind was screaming at her to just jump but her body wasn't following.
"Evie!" Batra screamed, giving her a light shove. This was all she needed before she used her own momentum to jump off the back of the truck, feeling her heart jump in that fraction of a second she was in the air. The impact was hard and unforgiving, her arm crushed beneath her own weight and rocks jabbing into her sides as she rolled into the grass as Hani had told her to do. She squeezed her eyes shut, occasionally opening them just enough to see a whirl of grass, sky, and dirt as she was hurled into the grass.
When she finally stopped moving, she landed stomach down. Pain flared up in her gunshot wound and in her arm, making her grimace but she didn't have time to process the deep stabbing sensation throughout her body. Her eyes darted around to her surroundings, taking in the endless stretch of forest in all directions. The truck meanwhile, had come to a screeching halt. Evie glanced over with wide eyes just in time to see the guard getting up right behind where Hani was on his knees, looking out at Evie from the truck. The man had an enraged look on his face when he saw Evie, but soon his anger was diverted to Batra.
"No!" she shrieked as the barrel of the gun connected with Hani's skull. Evelyn watched her friend go down and made eye contact with the man who had hit Batra right after. He had a snarl etched deep in his face, but Evie couldn't find it in her to run. The cold air bit at her face and her hands, but even that didn't snap her out of her terrified stillness. The man shoved past Hani's unconscious body and jumped off the truck, hitting the ground running.
Run Evie, run... she screamed at herself, trying to will herself to move. Everything was happening so fast, oh god what was happening?
The front door of the truck popped open and three more people in black jumped out with guns already in their hands. Evie didn't know what it was that clicked in her mind, but something slapped her consciousness awake and she suddenly was on her feet, running into the treeline of the woods. She could hear shout from behind her, but they were inaudible from the wind rushing and whistling in her ears. The cold was piercing her now as she ran, her face and hands nearly numb at this point. Yet her heart felt like it was beating at a million beats per second and she could feel her blood pumping harshly through her body. It had been a long time since she had run, and the fact that there were shooting pains in her arm and side weren't helping.
Dodging roots and trees, Evie weaved in and out of all of the potential obstacles in her way. She was breathing so heavily and labored that could hardly think straight. She wanted to look back to see how much distance she had in between her and the gang, but she knew that would lead to her ultimate downfall, literally.
So Evie just kept running. She ran as fast as her legs could carry her. She ran so fast that her legs nearly faltered, unable to keep up with her speed. The water pouch from Batra that she had slung over her shoulder bounced against her hip with every step which would've irritated if under any other circumstance.
Evie tried to ignore the burning in her lungs and the sting in her throat from the freezing air she was sharply inhaling. Her head was bursting with a pounding headache on top of it all, but she just kept running, not even realizing that she couldn't even hear the sounds of the men behind her anymore.
She carried on running until her mind went numb and there was nothing left to think about; just running. Step after step became almost an automatic process. She just knew she couldn't stop. At one point Evie turned to go diagonally left, hoping to go off track. She kept her pace the best she could, but she couldn't ignore the agonizing stitch in her side forever. She was slowing down no matter how much she willed herself not to. At this point, she guessed she had to have run just below 2 miles in 20 minutes which she never even thought possible for herself. Exhaustion took over and she collapsed, not caring how the roots uncomfortably poked at her body.
Evelyn lied there, just listening to her own heaving; clouds in the air escaped from her lips from the cold as she did. She lied looking up at the canopy of trees in what seemed to be an afternoon sky. Her and Spencer would be wrapping up their paperwork at the office around this point, almost ready to go home. The thought blurred her eyes and a tear slipped down her cheek. How the hell did she end up here?
The realization that she had escaped came to her suddenly, however. She had done it. She was free of them, all of them. There was a deep pain in her consciousness knowing she had left Hani behind, but she pledged that she wouldn't stop until she freed him and his family when she got out of here.
Where even was here? She had run so far into the woods in a direction that she had no idea how to get back from. There were no signs of anything but pure forest in all directions and all she had was a small half-filled container of water to survive on. In other words, she was screwed.
Evie would've loved to have just stayed there while curled up into a ball, having given up on everything. She had someone to go home to, though. Someone who was worried about. She could imagine him now, urging her to go on. Telling her that he needed her.
With this in mind, Evelyn sat up, turning her perspective from the canopy to be looking through the dense collection of trunks of trees instead. They were all huge, some of them with red bark, some of them with more gray. The only sign of green however, was the moss or the needles on the pines. Evie really wished it was spring or fall or even summer. Anything other then the constant sting of the chilling air.
Pushing yet another one of her misfortunes aside, Evelyn pushed herself up, feeling the ache in her legs from all of the sprinting. Her side still hurt from where Batra had stitched up her wound and the nagging pain from landing on her arm the wrong way persisted. And yet, Evie began walking.
A/N: Always sorry for the long wait! Guess what the next chapter is about, though! Get excited!
P.S. Who else loved the first episode of the 11th season of CM? Spencer was adorable.