Jasmine's Day Off-Chapter 44

Paula: *runs by, stops, and looks back* "Momma… are you cryin' … umm, let's have a battle, that will make you forget about that dumb river."

Neurologist: "You're not helping! Go away!" *tries to wipe away the tears that she has been holding back*

Paula: "Come on, you can talk to me about anything… 's(it's) not like I'll understand."

Neurologist: *tries to let out all of her thoughts at once* "He has multiple fractures throughout his body, he's covered in bruises, I think all the hits I gave him caused that broken rib of his to go puncture his left lung… he's like that because I overreacted for the thousandth time this week… I just ruined that girl's life by destroying him… I didn't mean to hurt him so badly, but he kept making me madder and madder. That idiot deserved what he got… I'm not a bad person I just made a mistake… that they are both going to suffer because of… shit, I'm a monster… how can anyone love somebody like me... how could he ever love me… I won't ever be good enough for him… fuck it, who needs him… I sure as hell don't."

Paula: *hugs the neurologist* "That's right let all the bad thoughts out momma. Let them melt away with my hug."

Neurologist: *still letting out her thoughts* "Who am I kidding I need him… but he'll never love me because I'm so terrible… I fucking put one of my own patients in the ICU and gave the other one alcohol… which I dared her to drink completely. Damn it, she must be miserable in there all alone… I have to go say something, but what'll I say? Sorry for beating up your boyfriend to a bloody pulp… oh, and I'm sorry for fighting him until he was absolutely desperate to survive… he's only alive because he outsmarted me? Yeah like that will cheer her up or get her to forgive me for sending him to the ICU… fuck and he's on a respirator too… he won't be allowed to leave the hospital… much less see her again if anyone ever finds out… they won't find out because I'll make everyone that knows shut up about what happened today… yeah and I'll do my best to heal him up… that will make this all better... then people will love me for more than my looks… and then I won't ever be alone…" *looks at Paula* "right?"

Paula: "… Wait here, I'll go find more people to hug you." *runs upstairs*

Jasmine: *opens the door* "I heard all of that… are you bi-polar or something?"

Neurologist: "No… you wouldn't understand… no one ever does."

Mitch: "Sounds like you have Borderline Personality Disorder(BPD) or something extremely similar."

Neurologist: *looks at the scared child hiding in the corner* "Yeah, you'll have to start talking now or risk getting hurt the next time I see you. No, that wasn't a threat… it is a promise. Now talk."

Mitch: "Dad was wondering what could make you so moody all the time and I went researching… I stumbled on a few book about BPD… well more like I tripped over them. Umm, here look at my check list." *takes out a piece of paper and hands it to Jasmine."

Jasmine: "Why hand it to me?"

Mitch: "You can't pay me enough money to risk getting my leg put in a cast again."

Neurologist: "Hey, that was an accident and it is irrelevant since it happened when you were little."

Mitch: "It happened last year and you went from being happy to chasing me into a hole with your fists clenched."

Jasmine: "Okay so Extreme Mood Swings check. Difficulties in Relationships… I'd have to be an idiot not to check that one off for you… double check. Impulsive Behavior… you better hope that recent fight was mostly impulse… making me drink that bottle of who knows what seems rather impulsive… same with trying to pay me and Auggie to have sex… check. Fear of Abandonment… well you sounded pretty scared of being alone… check. Difficulty Managing Emotions… heh, more like your emotions manage you… check. Unstable Self-Image… well you think people only like you for your looks and that you are terrible… complete lie by the way and you felt the need to parade around naked when you were trying to keep the doctor by your side… yeah you could have been less obvious about that… check. Well you only needed 5, but you have 6 out of 9… congrats, you are now diagnosed with BPD… I think."

Neurologist: *irritated* "What are the other 3?"

Jasmine: "Self-injuring acts, Suicidal Ideation, and Transient Psychotic Episodes."

Mitch: "Check check check… she has all 9 symptoms of BPD. I think we should take her to some of the nearby support centers to get her hel-"

Neurologist: "No, just go home you little brat and don't you dare mention any of this to your father or anyone else."

Mitch: "But you need to get help… I… I don't want to see you jump off a building again… Dad loves you."

Neurologist: "Oh for the last time I tripped… wait what did you just say?"

Mitch: "Umm, d-dad loves you. At least he thinks he does, but he seems confused and I… I'll stop talking now."

Neurologist: "Want a hug?"