Honestly, I was going to wait a little bit more before uploading this chapter, but I couldn't resist.
I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it!
I do not own Elsword blablabla.
The room was enveloped in quietness, captured in the stillness of a moment caught in time with only the agitated panting of a man irrupting in the density of that heavy silence. Everything was completely bathed in the darkness of the night and only slight traces of a white shimmer contoured the shapes of the unfamiliar setting. The weighty atmosphere fell over him like trying to constrict him with its accusatory murmur of silent reproaches, protecting that frozen frame of a wrongful climax. Right at that moment he could feel the warmth of the body underneath him defying the coldness of his own skin, surrounding him of the welcoming heat it emanated, and the slow up and down motion of her breathing. The disgust grew larger and fuller of intensity in his guts.
"What the hell?!" her voice exclaimed right next to his ear with the confusion and the anger printed evidently on her exasperated tone. He felt her hands on his chest trying to push him away, but he was unmovable. "Get off me right now! Who gave you the right...?!" he heard her insist once her attempts of using force against him proved to be futile.
"Miss...Ara..." he cut her off with a weak voice that struggled to get out of his chest, getting lost somewhere in his throat, choking him. For a second it felt like needles were travelling through his tongue instead of those simple words, and he found himself wanting to hide with a childish impetus that had been buried deep inside of him for so many years, repressed, suffocated. The fear of losing himself to this sickness overcame the flood of emotions that twirled inside, and his last defensive resource was to bury himself against that appealing heat. The powerful smell that had driven him to a blind madness so many times was now a calming trace of familiarity that he inhaled with the hunger of an addict as his only consolation. The irony of it all pulled a suffocated chuckle out of his broken spirit and he recognized himself defeated. "Please...don't push me away" he managed to articulate in a desperate plea that seemed to cast a light of understanding in the girl victim of his recklessness, because the pushing and squirming stopped suddenly.
His upper body was then surrounded by arms that drew him closer, tightly and firmly embracing him with a tenderness that he couldn't get himself used to. He felt her fingers running delicately through his hair and something oppressive weighting inside his chest. The softness of her touch made him feel allowed to let go of his tight grip on her shoulders and sink his body onto her even more, being freed of his own weight. He was welcomed by her with no questions or reproaches, convinced that the answers she was seeking didn't need to be spoken, sensing a complicit and mutual understanding. So close to the object of his desires and yet he wouldn't dare betraying the trust she was putting on him, exposed as she was the notion of his guilt was stronger than anything else.
Despite the heavy weight over her, she managed to partially sit down on the bed with her back still slightly curved and resting on the mattress and moving to a side, accommodating him the same way. He felt like a dead weight, being moved around by her like that, but there was something similar to a motherly protectiveness in the way she managed to cuddle him between her neck and chest and hold him close. It was the closest he had ever been to that kind of comfort ever since he was a mere child, and those memories were still just blurry images in his mind, no matter how much he tried to recover those soothing sensations of the far past.
"It is okay now. You won" she cooed with a whispering voice that seemed to melt on his ears. He savored those words like the ultimate proof of this small victory. He had successfully conquered over the beast one more time, he knew that and yet her statement felt like the most reassuring confirmation. A light tranquility slowly followed to his internal turmoil, replacing it little by little as the minutes passed in silence and her fingers caressed his scalp. Not a single word was pronounced from that point on, and he enjoyed that comforting and full silence as his consciousness gradually became black.
The next time he opened his eyes everything was still covered in darkness, yet the first thing he saw were brilliant orange eyes staring at him from the opposite side of the bed. A slight confusion invaded him as he incorporated, sitting up and running a hand through his hair to fix the mess.
"It is about to dawn, you should probably leave before the sun rises" a soft voice whispered to him, talking in a way that didn't disturb the quietness of the early morning. He looked over to see Ara by his side and a strange and unknown sensation took over his chest, as if a giant hand was grabbing his organs from the inside. He frowned, still not completely aware of the situation he was in, trying to process and recognize his surroundings and get rid of the drowsiness that kept his mind cloudy.
"Yes, certainly, I should" he answered unconvinced, his voice coming out through his throat with an unexpected dryness that made it strange to recognize that voice as his own. He stared at her while she got out of bed, the simple white dress she used as a night gown flowing lightly by her sides as she walked around the room, searching for something. She opened the drawer and took a hair brush out of it before going back to where he was. "What are you doing?" he questioned her grumpily, his voice giving away the lingering drowsiness.
"I will help you comb your hair. Having it loose looks rather charming on you, but the ponytail is a signature" she said lightly, lifting the edges of her dress to give freedom to her legs before accommodating them at his sides as she positioned herself behind him.
"Don't touch my hair" he retorted with a husky voice.
"You didn't say anything about that last night, did you? You are so grumpy" she replied with a slight trace of mockery in her tone. And she certainly hit the spot, because he didn't have anything to say to that. He figured she had interpreted his silence as permission when feeling her hands grab portions of his hair softly, running the hair brush gently through it. Even if he wasn't going to admit it, it felt extremely relaxing the way she worked through his hair with such delicacy. If any part of it got loose again and were to fall on his face, she would pick it up again, brushing her fingers against his cheeks. He liked it when that happened; he thought her hands were really soft.
Ara used one of her own hairpins to hold his hair in place.
"Look at me" she commanded after leaving the hair brush on the bed, grabbing his shoulders lightly. He obeyed silently, staring at her with a slight frown showing on his forehead when he turned his head to meet her eyes, letting her examine the finished work. She ran her fingers through his cheeks, accommodating the few strands of hair she had left out of the ponytail. He closed his eyes. "How charming" she said finally, a faint smile curving her lips before she got up once more.
At that point he knew there wasn't anything else keeping him in her room, so he got out of bed as well, fixing his wrinkled clothes before walking towards the balcony. He didn't look at her again, but he could feel her gaze piercing on his back when he was about to jump off back to the street, the same way he had came in.
"So...about your invitation" she started in a whisper, he stood still. "I will go".
"Good. Be there tonight" he merely replied right before making his exit.
Even when the preparations for the ball were ready without him having to do anything but give instructions to the employees of the castle and the guests started to arrive, he couldn't help feeling anxious and stressed. Seeing how the mansion was slowly starting to fill up with dignitaries and aristocrats that were nothing but strangers to him felt oppressing. He had never been very fond of big crowds, and having to act as the host for this sort of meetings was something that made him feel completely out of his element. The first hour he occupied himself in greeting the guests with a wide smile and courteous words that didn't hold a single trace of honesty in them, having to listen to banal conversations and dishonest flattery that were boring him endlessly. Still, he had been raised a gentleman and taught the relevance of keeping this kind of connections, so he diligently made a display of his manners and flawless role as a host.
Big groups of people had formed all over the principal salon, chatting lightly with glasses of wine in their hands, filling the room with circles that allowed the butlers to come and go between those improvised corridors of empty space, offering the delicacies the cooks had prepared for the occasion. All of the candles and chandeliers were lit up, filling the lounge with a golden light; the turntable played a waltz. Add stood in the middle of the room with a glass of animal blood that did a great job in passing as wine, looking at his surroundings with a strong displeasure showing just slightly on his partially twisted mouth. He sipped a bit of the liquid, savoring its metallic taste smoothly going down through his throat, his eyes scanning the salon.
"Excuse me, Mister Kim?" a feminine voice took him out of his self-absorption. He looked over to the source of the voice to find an elegantly dressed woman standing in front of him. The daughter of one of the dignitaries, he guessed. "I wanted to thank you personally for the invitation. This is such a lovely party. The set up of the salon is magnificent and the food is delicious, you must have worked really hard to set this up" she said showing a big smile, her tone being too high for his tastes. This sort of conversation was annoying to him, but he managed to show her a smile nonetheless.
"I am greatly honored by your compliments, Miss. I am glad everything I have prepared is of your liking" he answered courteously, smiling down at her charmingly. "Please do enjoy this evening" he added.
"Oh I will, doubtlessly. With a fine man like you as a host, I am certain it will be an enjoyable night" she said, batting her eyelashes while fixing the cleavage of her dress. "You'll have to excuse me for making such a selfish request, but would you mind having this piece of dance with me?" she asked, smiling broadly at him as she interlaced her arm with his. He had to hold back the impulse of flinching with the sudden contact of their arms.
"Of course, allow me to escort you" he conceded, hiding his displeasure. He bent his arm and brought it to his stomach, giving the woman a firm stance to hold on to before walking next to her towards the center of the salon where other couples were dancing to the music. Stopping, she stood in front of him with a big smile, placing a hand on his shoulder lightly and letting him grab her free hand. He held her by the back and started to move swiftly to the rhythm of the waltz, swinging at a perfect timing with the music and guiding her along the way, tracing circles on the spot with their movements. He could sense her eyes scrutinizing his face, waiting for him to stare back, but he couldn't really get into the moment. His eyes kept wandering around the room as the scenery around them changed and repeated itself in circles, taking in their surroundings.
Then, trying to blend with the crowd he spotted her, standing alone in one of the corners of the room with her long black hair tied up in a bun held with a small braid and a few strands of hair falling by the sides of her porcelain face. She wore a long crimson dress that showed off her shoulders, tightly wrapped around her upper body and falling gracefully from her hips with an ample skirt below the black corset. He saw her looking everywhere, examining the people around her like a foreigner, until she noticed him too. Their eyes met for an instant, and for a brief moment it felt like a recreation of the night they met. He felt the woman's body closing the distance between them and her hands tightening their grip on him. His mouth twisted in response.
"What's the matter, Mister Kim? You seem distracted" he heard her say, even though her voice sounded distant. Every turn they made, he managed to lock his eyes to Ara's again and again. He noticed she hadn't stopped looking at him either, because her eyes immediately met his every time.
"Oh, it is nothing. Please, do not worry about me, Miss" he replied, laughing doubtfully under his breath. Every bit of the dance that passed she seemed to close the distance between them even more, talking to him and asking questions he always replied automatically. He felt relieved when the song ended before she could actually throw herself to hug him, and took a step back from her, holding her hand still and directing a faint smile to her. "It has been lovely having this dance with you, Miss. Unfortunately, I must leave you now. Again, please enjoy the evening" he told her, releasing her of his grip and walking away before she had the chance to answer. It had been unpleasant enough for him to put up with more time with that woman.
Add made his way to one of the corners of the lounge, where he knew he would find her. And there she was, standing with her back supported on the wall behind her, her arms folded over her chest. He felt the inquisitive look she directed at him, peering at his face.
"That was a beautiful dance" she commented with a soft voice once he was standing in front of her. He couldn't help but snort at her words. Of course she would say something like that.
"It really wasn't" he replied huskily. One of the butlers walked by and he stopped him with a motion of his hand, grabbing one of the glasses of wine he carried in a tray, and then handed it to Ara.
"Thank you" she said before taking a sip of the dark liquid.
"I didn't think you would come" he said.
"I told you I would, didn't I?" she replied.
"You did, but I didn't think you actually would".
"Well, I am here now. Even though you don't seem to need a partner after all" she retorted, drinking some more without taking her eyes off him for a single second. Her tone struck him as somewhat cunning.
"Are you jealous, perhaps?" he inquired with a mocking tone, followed by the arching of one his eyebrows and a crafty tone. He couldn't help but laugh when she frowned.
"It doesn't really matter if I tell you I am not, does it? You will think whatever you want" she replied, a little bit haughtily.
"That is correct" he said with another, more extended laugh that came out huskily and dryly. "But I won't reject you if you ask me for a dance" he added, speaking cockily to follow up their mocking interaction.
"Actually, there is something I would like to talk to you about, before anything else" she said, her voice now showing the seriousness of her words as her face became stern. He immediately frowned in anticipation, nodding as a way of letting her go on. "When do you think I'll be able to read that book?" she asked, chewing onto her lower lip.
"Do you feel ready?" he asked. She nodded as the only answer, determination showing all over her face. He knew it was something important to her, maybe important to him too, and that it wouldn't be fair to deny her the right of reading that book after all the work they had done towards that objective. Even if it made her hate him in the end. "Do it once the ball is over" he replied.
"Fair enough" she said. "Thank you…for helping me with this. It is really important to me" she added with seriousness. Her words casted a resigned smile to appear on his face. He knew that, the same way he knew that none of that sincere gratitude she was expressing to him was going to exist once she discovered the truth, that nothing was going to be the same. But he could treasure it while it lasted.
"There is absolutely no need to thank me. Now…" he started, offering his arm to her with a charming smile curving his lips, lighting up his face. "May I have this dance?". She laughed lightheartedly in response, interlacing her arm with his tightly and moving closer to him.
"You may" she conceded, grinning at him. He stared at her for a few seconds, noticing the subtle shine in her eyes, the way her smile seemed to bring life to her face. It looked like an expression worth treasuring.
They walked together, side by side to the center of the salon, the same way he had done just a few minutes ago. Except that this time, the atmosphere that surrounded them felt different. She placed one hand delicately over his shoulder, barely touching it, and he held the other with a firm yet soft grip as he brought her closer with a hand on her lower back. Staring into each other's eyes they started to move with the lead of the music accompanying every step, gracefully sliding their feet across the floor as if they weren't even touching it. The way she was looking at him was intense, far from the awe and astonishment with which she glanced at him the day they met. There was no trace of admiration, fear or bewilderment on her gaze but rather a noticeable confidence that could only have its origin on the moments shared. The way she clung to him so firmly showed too that there was no doubt on her movements. Eventually the distance between their bodies became naturally narrower.
As they got even further into the dance he gradually started to be extremely aware of every little sensation and detail. Like the warmth that emanated from her body and how the contact of their hands created a tepid temperature that melted the coldness of his own skin, or how small her back felt under his hand, the way he could feel her accelerated heartbeats against his chest as if they were his own. And how close she seemed to be, and how much closer he wanted her to. He remembered how soft her skin felt against his cheeks the previous night, and how soft her face must had been as well.
He let his hand slide through hers, tracing her palm with his fingers as he slowly moved it back, feeling her gaze piercing into his eyes. Feeling her skin under the tip of his fingers he drew the contour of her arm, then the curve of her shoulder and the shape of her neck. He felt the line of her jaw under his touch and her small chin between his thumb and index finger, the warmth of her breathing close to his nose and the incredible softness of her lips exhaling hot breath into his mouth when he kissed her. With closed eyes they stopped moving, and he pulled her even closer when her arms were wrapped around his neck, cupping her cheek with the palm of his hand, caressing her skin with his thumb. Their lips intertwined shakily, biting onto each other, grabbing and pulling with delicacy, craving that contact over and over again. He heard her groan softly, the wild beating hitting his chest through her body; he felt and savored and pursued the sweetness of her mouth and the way their lips seemed to mold into each other perfectly. Then the heat and humidity of her tongue and the inside of her mouth, loving the way in which it felt so deep and so intimate. Her hands grabbed tightly onto his back and he felt her breathing becoming more and more agitated by the second. He let his lips slide through hers slowly as he moved back, keeping their faces close. She looked up at him with an expression he had never seen before, her eyes so brilliant, so full of a strange and charming emotion that looked like a silent plea. He gazed at her to take everything in and burn it into his memory; her parted lips, her colored cheeks, those wanting eyes. None of them moved an inch, staying close to each other, enjoying the shared warmth.
"I think…I could fall in love with you" he spoke to her in an ever so soft voice that slid through his lips almost naturally, words that he could almost taste. He saw the faint smile that formed on her face, curving her rose lips slightly.
"I think I could too" she replied in a whisper, and his chest felt heavy and full of something soft and alive that tickled him from the inside. He wondered if she felt that as well.
He didn't take his eyes off her for a single second, peering down at her face. That's why he was able to see the exact moment in which her eyes focused in something else, something behind him, and the second her expression distorted into one of horror. Her hands slowly left his shoulders, moving to his chest with a doubtful motion. He turned around to see what she was seeing. She muttered something under her breath.
"Elesis…".
Welp, it happened.
Artemicon: Thank you! But...what do you mean?
nanashimai: He certainly is a really troubled man, poor thing.
Also, what's that about the 'citrus fruit' and 'is the lime coming soon' thing, are you guys talking about lemon? If so, how dare you, you sinful little things.
My bf said the first part kinda looks like they're having sex, and I re-read it and...I guess it kinda does? Well THERE YOU GO, until the real thing comes i guess.
Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please let me know how you feel about it and if you're enjoying the fic so far!
See you soon.