Chapter 24

What The Fuck Is Up With The Moody Viking?

Pam's POV

I immediately liked the hot little blond that came strolling in with that asshole Bill Compton. He was on my shitlist, the short-shitlist at that. He had propositioned me on several occasions here at Fangtasia. No matter how many times I told the putrid maggot that I wasn't into vamp on vamp, he couldn't take the hint. I would have gladly staked him but the effort seemed worthless when I thought of all the gore that would get all over my Gucci pant suit and Ferragamo pumps. My dry cleaner would be pissed and Armand was not a vamp you wanted to anger.

So what the hell was a nice human like her doing with the dregs of the local undead? I couldn't figure it out. There was something about her but I couldn't define what it was. As a whole, I find humans boring, stupid and pointless beyond their uses for food and carnal pleasures. And I do greatly enjoy sex with humans. I would have greatly enjoyed introducing Miss Stackhouse to human female on vamp female sex. But I digress, this draw I felt to her was more than wanting to munch her box and sip some of that fine vintage that flowed through her pulsing veins. I was definitely intrigued. The look on my masters face told me that he was feeling this attraction as well. He looked almost animated. The wonders never cease.

I decided to hurry things along without any prompting from Eric. It was obvious that he wanted an introduction. It was also obvious that Billy-boy was determined that there not be one. That fact alone drove me to the table they sat at. After some brief pleasantries, I led them to where Eric sat on his throne, surrounded by fawning breathers. He shooed them away as we approached and they scattered like the cockroaches they were.

I stood back and watched the progression of Eric's fascination as well as heard it through our blood bond. He was already thinking of fucking her, of course, bent over a table in the bar in full view of everyone. Hot damn, I liked that idea. Eric was a hell of a lay. Like I said, I'm not into vamp on vamp, but he knew how to work a pussy, supe or human, and any woman would be lucky to find him between her legs.

There were strange waves emanating from Sookie as she looked around the bar. They were like invisible fingers, probing the air, investigating. I guess you could say that almost every vamp has an otherworldly gift of sorts. Eric can project his thoughts to anyones mind, Bill has the ability to be a total asshole, I myself can see human aura's. Some may say that this ability might be the reason I hate most of the breathing population. Most aura's are black, the sign of decay and rot of the soul and mind, this meaning that most humans are up to no good or soon will be. Sookie's aura was a very serene blue and it didn't just outline her body like every other aura I had ever seen, it pulsated, stretched and flowed into the room around her sometimes. Interesting indeed!

When she announced to Eric and I that the bar was about to be raided due to a fangbanger getting what he asked for (which is illegal in a public place like Fangtasia) in the bathroom, I knew the reason behind the strange aura. This hot little piece of cake was telepathically inclined.

We spoke with Sookie and Bill briefly outside before leaving. Bill took a stolen second to ask if he could probe me anally later. I ground my stiletto heel into his grotesque loafer before smiling at him sweetly. I had to give him credit for keeping his face pleasant while I tortured his toes.

The sound of approaching sirens reminded us that a quick exit was a fantastic idea. Eric and I went to my Mercedes and headed for his home. I was the only person in his service that knew where he slept. I had his security codes and knew how to access the lower level. My loyalty to Eric was real, I would die to protect him, he had given me this life I loved and I knew that if not for him I would be long returned to the dirt in a grave somewhere.

He had asked me several questions. What did I think of Sookie? What kind of name did I think Sookie was? Should he send her a copy of the calendar we had just started shooting? Did I think he should invite her back to Fangtasia? He might have gone on forever if I hadn't told him about her telepathic abilities. Didn't he wonder for a second how she knew of the raid?

His eyes gleamed the way they do when he's planning something devious. I love devious Eric, he's so much more fun that bored or angry Eric. I had never told him of Bill's advances and I planned on keeping that secret to myself. Eric would have felt it necessary to teach Bill a lesson and that could only get my master into trouble. Like I said, I was all about protecting him.

So I launched into a very un-Pam-like filibuster about how Sookie could be an asset to him, how I liked her and how he should do what it took to gain her favor and get her away from Bill. He would have thought of these things himself eventually but I wanted to get this intrigue on the road. What woman hasn't helped a man decide what he wanted or needed before? Sometimes they need a little prodding, sometimes they need a fist up their ass.

We plotted until the sun came up and for the first time in at least eighty years I slept beside Eric. It was the very first time, however, that we were in the same bed for any length of time without fucking the hell out of each other. I'm pretty sure that the same little blond-headed barmaid from Bon Temps invaded both our dreams that night.

As days went by his mood was swinging more than the asses in a gay pride parade. He would seem fine one minute and then turn into a brooding, snipping mess the next. I hated to take advantage of the mental bond but I had to know what was chapping the Viking's ass.

Holy fuck, he was falling in love. Eric Northman, thousand year old Scandinavian, kicker of asses and plunderer of villages was losing his grip, falling for a human. And it was pissing him off to no end.

It only got worse and not just for him. Suddenly there was a lot more of Bill coming around at Eric's summons. The bastard took every opportunity to hit on me. The final straw came when he tried to sneak up on me from behind and fang me in the back of my neck. I turned and grabbed him by the throat and told him that sex with him would be pointless. That after I had been fucking Eric's humongous cock for so long, his tiny baby dick would be lost in the tunnel. I knew by the look on his face that I'd put an end to his advances. I knew immediately that his pursuit of me had been a vampire pissing contest. It wasn't about him actually wanting me, it was the fact that Eric had fucked me and he hadn't. Men, human or undead were all the same.

I let him loose and he stood there, trying to appear brave, smoothing out the wrinkles I had just put into his JC Penney's slacks and his Wal-Mart polo shirt. I stamped my foot and the loud echo sent him blurring his way to Eric's office.

Time went on and Eric was getting steadily more distracted. Someone was embezzling an ass load of money from us. I had my suspicions that Ginjer was the thief but Eric used this opportunity to put Sookie's talent to use. He was so transparent. The old Eric would have just started killing people and kept on until the stealing stopped. But now he wanted Sookie to come and help discover who was responsible.

Even more surprising than finding out it was Longshadow who was to blame, was how Eric had staked his longtime bartender after he tried to kill Sookie. Don't get me wrong, I like Sookie just fine, but I couldn't believe the Eric I knew would protect a human by killing a brother. I wasn't overly fond of Longshadow, he bored me to no end, so my disbelief took a backseat to the love story I saw unfolding. Eric most definitely wanted Sookie. Sookie would absolutely want Eric as badly, she just didn't know it yet. And if she thought that little worm Bill was tossing at her was nice, wait til she got a gander and the sea serpent Eric was packing!

After that night, Eric seemed more like himself for the most part. He had taken to slinking around Merlottes to spy on Sookie. He said it was to make sure she was safe, I knew the truth. He couldn't stand to go a day without actually seeing her, even if it was through a dirty bar window. If I'd been capable of human emotion, I might have shed a tear at the sweetness of it all. I was proud though that I could think of it and not gag.

Eric called me in what I would almost call a tizzy one night. Sookie had asked him to accompany her to an orgy. My, Sookie, what a little minx! But he then explained to me all the boring details, murdered friend, blah blah blah, Bon Temps sex club, yada, yada, yada. I finally broke in and asked him if he cared about Sookie. Yes, he did, he told me. Well then, for fuck's sake, go protect her frail human ass. I suggested that he might get lucky and get the keys to the kingdom of Sookie's sugar walls. He laughed but even over the phone, I could hear the gears turning. I told him to drive that horrible red Corvette. I could just see the look of excitement of her face when he drove to pick her up in it. The he asked me how one would dress if they were gay. I couldn't resist, even if it meant being called out for it later. I told him to go to the 80's section of his closet and find something pink, neon and spandex.

So now, tonight, I'm summoned to his house with instructions to bring the dress he'd had made for her weeks ago, to find suitable accessories and to bring some make-up. I decided to stop and get her some greasy burgers because I knew she would be hungry from all the fucking she and Eric must have done. Nothing could have prepared me for the shock of not only seeing that she had drank Eric's blood (it was written all over face with little changes and the overall glow) but I could hear her thoughts. She was blood bonded with Eric. This was going to be bad. I knew that Bill was not going to take this lying down.