Words You Don't Mean

by Lillyflower01

"I love you." Even though those were he words he'd been longing to hear, they broke his heart more than anything else he'd ever heard. You shouldn't say things you don't mean. Dan Howell has been in love with his best friend, Phil Lester, for as long as he can remember. But of course the latter doesn't feel the same. However a fake relationship hurts more than rejection.

8. Chapter 8

CHAPTER EIGHT

Dan sat on his bed, his duvet wrapped around his shoulders and his laptop balanced dangerously on his knees. The screen was open to Tumblr but Dan was having a hard time concentrating. Ever sense the kiss things had been awkward between him and Phil. Dan knew Phil was trying to remain normal, but the older boy didn't quite know how to handle the situation.

Dan sighed, running his hand through his hair. He had to do something, he couldn't lose Phil.

He slowly set his laptop aside and stumbled to his feet, tip-toeing out the door. He stopped in front of Phil's door, his fist raised. His lower lip wormed it's way between his teeth as he took a large inhale of breath. He hadn't been this nervous to talk to Phil in seven years.

"Dan?"

Dan spun around, finding himself face to face with Phil.

"Oh-Oh, hey," mumbled Dan, a light pink dusting his cheeks. "I-I was just...I was thinking that we should film another gaming video..."

"Erm-Sure," nodded Phil. "What do you wanna play?"

"I-Um-Erm-W-We could-Um-I-I don't know..." Dan admitted, staring down at his bare feet.

The two stared at each other, not moving. Then Phil lunged forward, wrapping his arms tightly around the younger boy.

"I know I've been distant lately but you don't have to be scared to talk to me," murmured Phil.

Dan buried his face in Phil's shoulder, tightening his grip on the older boy.

"Do you wanna watch anime?" Phil asked. "We can think of an idea for the gaming video."

Dan nodded, quickly. "Yeah, okay."

Phil dragged Dan into the living room and the two sat down, leaving a respectful distance between them. Dan curled into a ball, his head resting on the couch cushion as his eyes stayed glued to the screen.

For the first few episodes, the two friends watched with a small distance between them. But after awhile, they ended up cuddled together. It made Dan smile. Maybe things could go back to normal.

"Dilitha is basically phan in the sim world," Phil stated. "I saw that on Tumblr somewhere."

Dan chuckled. "Which one am I?"

"I dunno," shrugged Phil. "The lazier one."

"Oi!" Dan deadpanned. "Rude."

Phil giggled. "Okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

A smile flickered over Dan's face as Phil quickly pecked his cheek.

"You're cute," grinned Phil, causing Dan's cheeks to turn a light pink.

"Stop. Ugh. Don't be cute, it's gross," Dan joked, poking Phil's nose.

Phil just chortled and quickly kissed Dan's lips before returning to the screen.

"We need to buy Dil a new hobby," Phil stated.

"Y-Yeah," agreed Dan, trying his best to not appear flustered. "Well, I mean, we wouldn't have to if you didn't make me sell his Bonsai Tree!"

"I didn't make you," Phil argued. "You were the one who wanted money for Tabitha's party."

"Okay, well, how about we buy his violin again?" Dan suggested.

"Sure," agreed Phil. "Do you think he'll remember everything or will he have to learn it all again?"

"I hope he doesn't have to learn it all again," laughed Dan. "That was terrible!"

"So bad," Phil chortled.

"We'll be proud of him anyways."

"We're good dads."