A/N: Thank you for all of the reviews and PMs. I appreciate every single one. Truly.
A few of you wanted to know if I planned on writing new story. Yes. I have been writing an original story. I've been looking forward to spreading my wings with original characters and new story lines. You can send me a friend request on facebook at "Netzel Fanfiction" and/ or I have a Twitter account "Netzel Netzelfanfic to keep up with my progress.
As far as Late Night Thoughts…It's no secret that I love these characters and I love this story. I may write a one-shot here and there, filling in the gaps.
Now back to Swan Songs. This is Part 2 of 3. The timeline is still fast forwarding. The chapter after this will be the Last Chapter for Late Night Thoughts- 20 Years Later. I know it's corny, but I am truly humbled by the support all of you have given me through this story. Every review, PM and view is very much appreciated. Special thanks to Susana and Marpuri for the Jane idea.
Ok...on with the show…Part Two of Three.
Swan Songs- Part 2 of 3
June, 2041
"Christian, the baby is crying. Can you get her out of the crib? I'm in the middle of helping Raymond get dressed."
"I'm on it, baby."
Taking care of children was definitely easier when we were in our twenties. We've had Raymond and Gabriella since Friday night. Teddy and Maddie needed some adult time. I remember those days, when we were desperate to sleep in, go to the bathroom without an audience or have a little "alone" time without interruption.
Christian and I are exhausted. We love our grandchildren but we can't wait to give them back to their parents, we need the sleep. Thank God it's Sunday. Teddy and Maddie should return to pick up their little munchkins around lunchtime.
"Raymond, are you sure you want to wear your Superman cape and the boots? I think the jeans and T-shirt you are wearing are fine without it."
He looks at me and rolls his eyes.
"Grandma. I have to be ready for the bad guys" He furrows his brow, ugh…another mini Christian to deal with. Not only is this four year old child a carbon copy of Teddy, making him a carbon copy of Christian, but he's as mercurial as his Grandfather too.
"Of course, how silly of me. Ok, wear your cape and boots. What would you like for breakfast this morning?"
"I want Grandpa to take me out."
"You do?"
He nods.
"Ok…I'll see what I can do."
I walk into Teddy's old bedroom, which now has a twin bed and crib for when the grandchildren stay overnight. Christian is cradling the baby in his arms and singing to her. How freaking adorable. I take a moment and listen. Then I'm about to kill him.
"You, your sex is on fire
And you, your sex is on fire.
Consumed with what's to transpire"
"Christian Grey…are you singing 'Sex on Fire' to that baby?" I ask.
"I only know one lullaby and I'm saving it for another day. I don't know any others, this was the best I could do. She likes it, look…she stopped crying."
Saving a lullaby? What the hell does that mean? Oh, whatever…she did stop crying. I briefly close my eyes and shake my head. Let's just move on.
"Raymond has requested you take him out for breakfast. Do you want to take him?"
"Did he now?" He grins. Christian and Raymond have a very special bond. It's really quite sweet.
"He did. Do you want to take him out?"
"Sure. Give me five minutes and I'll be ready to go."
"Where do the two of you go? You never tell me."
'Top secret Mrs. Grey." He hands the baby over to me, kisses my forehead and leaves the bedroom.
~o0o~
"Must you wear that cape and boots?" I shake my head.
"Grandpa, I have to protect you from the bad guys"
There's no arguing with this child. He's headstrong and can be so moody at times. He must get that from his mother's side of the family. It looks like we're going inside with the cape and boots.
"Raymond, you must hold my hand while we walk through the parking lot."
He reaches his tiny hand up and I wrap mine around his. I laugh to myself as I watch him surveying the parking lot in his Superman get-up, searching for bad guys. I can't help but feel a sense of pride as I glance down at him, my life's goal has been to keep my family safe and here he is doing the same as he walks into the restaurant in his cape and red rubber boots, his only care in the world is keeping the villains away from his Grandpa.
"My Dad used to bring me here when I was a child."
"To IHOP?"
"Yes, when Grandma Grace was away. He would bring me here with my brother and sister."
"What's your dad's name?"
"Carrick"
"Where does he live?"
"He lives in heaven now"
"Like an angel?"
"Yes Raymond, like an angel."
"Were you sad when he went to heaven?"
"Yes, I was very sad."
"How did you feel better?"
"I would visit you and I'd feel better." I shrug. This little man brightened up even my darkest days.
"Is Grandma Grace an angel too?"
"I suppose she is…she's my angel on earth. She lives with my sister Mia now."
Our server places our breakfast plates in front of us. Two large stacks of pancakes and bacon. I have a cup of coffee and Raymond has a cup of milk, which he insisted had to be served in a coffee mug, so he could be like his Grandpa. What a great fucking kid.
As we're eating, Raymond pulls a small toy dinosaur out of his jean pocket and pretends its flying over our breakfast plates.
"Do you like flying, Raymond?"
"Yes"
"When you're a little older, I'll take you soaring…it's like a plane ride, but different. It's more like you're sailing through the sky."
"Like a Pterodactyl?"
Always with the fucking dinosaurs.
"Yes,like a Pterodactyl"
"Cool Grandpa. High five." He holds up his hand, looking at me expectantly. I roll my eyes and slap his waiting palm.
Christ, High fives…probably his great Uncle Elliot's influence.
We finish up our meal and head toward the car. Raymond's tiny hand is holding mine while his cape whips in the wind.
"So we don't tell Grandma where we went?"
"No, it's our secret. Not knowing where we went will drive your Grandmother crazy."
"Do you like to drive Grandma crazy?"
"In all things" I smirk.
"Ok. Thanks for breakfast Grandpa."
"Thank you for keeping the bad guys away, Raymond"
~o0o~
We get into the car, I make sure Raymond is tightly strapped into his booster seat and I instruct Roger to drive us back to the Big House.
"Grandpa, can we go to the park?"
"The park? We have a backyard that's three times larger than the park."
"Please, I wanna go on the swings." His blue eyes are pleading with me. There's no fucking way I'm going to say no.
I glance down at my watch and sigh. I have work waiting for me at home but fuck it.
"Roger, take us to the park."
Raymond grins. I'm getting soft in my old age.
~o0o~
The park is so fucking crowded. There are half naked people laid out on the grass, soaking up the sun. Haven't they heard of skin cancer? Children are running like wild animals all over the park…where are their parents? Don't they have any control over their children?
There's some hideously tuned song playing from an ice cream truck. What is that song? It sounds so familiar. Christ, it's "Turkey in the Straw". Now I'm never going to get that fucking song out of my head. Rollerbladers, skateboarders, barking dogs…noise, noise, noise.
I roll my eyes. Why, oh fucking why, did I agree to this?
"This way Grandpa." Raymond tugs at my hand, pulling me in the direction of the swings.
As we're walking to the swings, some idiot on rollerblades nearly knocks Raymond over.
"Hey, watch it, you fucker" I yell at him.
"Oh, uh…sorry" he mumbles. I feel like I've seen this jerk before. Well, I'm not going to waste my time figuring out that mystery.
"Grandpa, you said a bad word." Raymond shakes his little finger at me. Nothing like being scolded by a four year old.
"Sorry Raymond."
We finally get to the swings. Raymond jumps on, insisting I don't push him. I have to admit, he looks fucking adorable with his cape flapping in the wind as he pumps his legs wearing those ridiculous red rubber boots.
I sit on a park bench that faces the swings and watch Raymond. As I thought, 'Turkey in the Straw' is playing over and over in my head when I hear a purr from the side of the bench.
"Hello Mr. Grey."
I look over to my side. Oh, this is fucking great, its Phoebe's friend. The last fucking person I want to see. This girl has flirted with me and every male security employee we've employed since she was five.
This park really is my hell on Earth.
"Hello Jennifer" I nod.
"What are you doing here, Mr. Grey?" she asks as she as mindlessly twirls a strand of hair around her finger.
"I'm here with Raymond. He's on the swings."
"Oh, isn't he adorable? And sooo handsome, just like his Grandfather." She purrs, batting her eyelashes.
Go away. Go away.
I hear a whining sound coming from the back of the bench. That's when I notice in Jennifer's other hand is a leash that is wrapping around the bench. I turn my head to find the source of the whining and see a small Beagle, with his tail between his legs, trying to hide under the bench.
"And who do we have here?" I ask.
"Oh, this little guy is from the Animal Rescue where my Mom volunteers. He's very timid around adults. We're afraid no one will adopt him. I was visiting my Mom and offered to bring him to the park to try to socialize him. I heard about Baxter passing away last year, Mr. Grey. I'm very sorry."
"Thank you." I nod. It's been over a year but just hearing Baxter's name still guts me.
"Grandpa!" Raymond comes barreling over. "Is this your new doggie?" He kneels to the ground and pets the dog. The dog seems rather receptive to him, licking his face and furiously wagging his tail.
"No, Raymond. He's just visiting the park."
The dog walks over to me and sniffs my feet. He looks up at me and stares. I've avoided dogs ever since Baxter died. I can't bear to be around them. There's something interesting about this little guy. I like his face. I reach my hand out, pat his head and scratch behind his ear. He cocks his head to the side and closes his eyes.
"He could use a forever home, Mr. Grey"
"I'm sorry Jennifer. I've had my fill of dogs."
"If you ever change your mind, you know where to find us. Well, I guess I better get going. I'll see you at Phoebe's wedding in August, Mr. Grey. Make sure you save a dance for me." She purrs.
I'll dance with you when pigs fly.
Raymond says his goodbye to the dog and sits next to me on the bench.
"See ya Mr. Grey, Raymond." She tugs on the leash "Come on Taylor, let's go"
Taylor?
"Bye doggie" Raymond sadly waves.
"Are you ready to go Raymond?"
"Grandpa…do you want another doggie?"
"No, Raymond."
"Why not?"
"Because dogs die."
He furrows his brow and his lips form a hard line. He must get that from his Mother's side too.
"When my fish died, Mommy got me a new one. She said everybody needs a home"
"Did she now? Well, I suppose they do."
I've never entertained the thought of adopting another dog. The idea of replacing Baxter feels disloyal.
~o0o~
"It's about time the two of you met. This is Baxter's favorite tree. Baxter's ashes are buried under this tree. You are not to lift a leg and piss anywhere around this tree. This is sacred ground. If you disobey this rule, you will be punished for your transgression. Do you understand?"
A vacant stare looks back at me.
"Baxter, this is Taylor. He's been with us for two weeks now. He's not your replacement, just another lost soul like us, looking for a home and a second chance." I shake my head and exhale. No matter how much time has passed, it's always difficult to visit Baxter's final resting place.
"I miss the fuck out of you, boy. You were the best dog that ever lived. After you died, I'd sit in my study and stare at your empty bed for weeks. You've set the bar pretty fucking high for Taylor. He's a great dog too, but he needs some work to bring him up to our standards."
I glance over at Taylor, who is running in a circle, chasing his tail.
"Do you see the fucking shit I have to deal with?" I ask Baxter's small tombstone.
I straighten myself up in my Dom stance and stare down Taylor in effort to bring him to heel, he looks up at me, wags his tail and barks. When I met him at the park, he was so timid. I thought for sure he was a born submissive. Yet this dog defies me at every turn. It's frustrating as hell yet I fucking love the challenge.
July, 2041
I better keep my eyes open for Grey again. I nearly knocked him and some little kid over two weeks ago. The guy owns half of Washington, why would he be in a public park, my little slice of the world? Well, I don't think he recognized me as a GEH employee, so I'm in the clear yet again.
It's is great day for rollerblading in the park, hot and sunny. The warmer it is outside, the fewer clothes the ladies wear and that's just the way I like it. Less is more in my book.
There's a stone cold fox sitting alone at on a bench. I'm going to roll over there and brighten up her day.
"Hey there pretty lady. Do you remember me?"
"No" she says dryly.
"Oh that's right; we've only met in my dreams"
"Hmmm" she purses her lips.
"Didn't I see you on the cover of Vogue?"
"No, I'm not a model." She blushes. Ah yes, my charm is working. No one can resist me when I'm on my game.
"Do you live around here?" I ask.
"Yes, not far."
"Oh, I thought you may have been lost because heaven is a long way from here"
She cocks her head to the side and studies me. Yeah, yeah, that's right pretty lady, this is your lucky day. Drink me in, pretty lady, drink me in.
"What's your name?" She asks.
"Jake. And yours?"
"Jane"
Her lips curl up, ever so slightly. Uh-oh. I know this look. The dreaded brush off. What is wrong with the ladies in Washington? Don't they know a prize when they meet one?
"Well pretty Jane, here I am. What were your other two wishes?"
She looks down at my rollerblades then back up at me.
"You know what they say about men with big feet. Want to prove that to me?" she purrs.
Huh?
"Do you want to have my children?" I ask.
"No."
"OK, can we just practice then?" I raise a brow. It's a very sexy move, subtle, but brings attention to my incredibly sexy international male model facial features.
"You want to have sex, Jake? Breathe for yes, lick your elbow for no."
She just said what?
"I'd like to point out that "beautiful" has U in it. But, 'quickie' has U & I together."
"Your body is a wonderland and I want to be Alice" She licks her lips.
I have butterflies in my stomach. Is this girl real?
"Baby, I'm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock!"
"If you were a burger at McDonalds, you'd be McSexy"
I've often thought that myself.
"Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material. Maybe you could wear it"
"I have a better idea; you can take off your shirt. You know what'd look better on you?"
"What?"
"Me." She murmurs.
I think I'm in love. I'm totally in love.
She stands up from the bench. Shit, she's leaving. The girl of my dreams is leaving me. For the first time in my life, I feel …crushed.
"Hey aren't you forgetting something?" I ask.
"What?"
"Me."
She looks me up and down, surely soaking up the awesomeness that is Jake.
Please, pretty Jane, be unique and different and say yes.
"Look Jake…" she sighs.
Here comes the big kiss off. She continues…
"My twin sister in town; she's staying with me for a few days."
"I see." I get it, I get it. I've been down this road before…the big fuck you. Here it comes.
"I hope you don't mind a threesome" she smiles as she holds out her hand to me.
What the fuck? Did heaven just plunk this angel down on this park bench just for me? Jane is the ying to my yang. I know it.
"Jane, what took you so long to come into my life?"
August, 2041
It's a week before Phoebe's wedding and what a week it is. There's just so much to take care of and so little time left. Our wedding planner, Javier and his assistant Brooke have been wonderful, taking care of all the little details from the flowers arrangements to securing accommodations for out of town guests.
We're meeting at the venue. Choosing the venue was easy for Phoebe. She has always had a soft spot for Grace and Carrick's Bellevue property. Although Grace is now living with Mia and Ethan, we've always made sure the property was well maintained. Grace was thrilled when Phoebe asked if she could have her wedding there.
I've always had a sentimental draw to this property too. I look toward to water, at the boathouse. So many memories from that old place…Christian's hearts and flowers proposal, to the many times we'd secretly slip away from family and fooled around like teenagers.
I look back to the house, where we shared family dinners, celebrated our engagement and made love in Christian's old bedroom.
I glance at the grounds where we danced at so many Coping Together events and more importantly, our first dance as husband and wife. Yes, this place is very special.
Christian is coming here straight from the airport. He's been in New York for the past four days and wanted to see for himself the progress of the wedding plans. Always the micromanager.
Phoebe, Javier and Brooke are huddled together in deep discussion over what shade of purple the flower arrangements will be. I never realized there can be so many different purples. The purple theme Phoebe wanted made me smile. Ever since she started working at GEH, she's been so focused and serious…it's nice to see her let a bit of the frilly little girl inside of her shine through.
"Bella Ana, do you like?" Javier walks over to me, hooking his arm around mine; his free hand is holding a photograph of a floral arrangement for the table. This is the first time I'm seeing the flower arrangements. I wasn't able to go to the florist to see them in person, Phoebe and her fiancé Matt chose the flowers.
"Oh, it's lovely, Javier. Do you like it, Phoebe?"
"Yes, I love them. Javier can you show my Mom the bouquets?"
"Of course…Brooke can you get the bouquet photos, por favor."
'Of course, Javier"
"Oh Bella Ana, you will love it. Of course, the flowers are not as beautiful as you." He turns to me, wraps his hands around each of my forearms, leans in and kisses my cheeks. I blush.
He looks at me with a sweet smile when I notice his expression changes almost immediately, as he's looking past my shoulder. What?
I turn my head to spot what's concerned Javier; Christian is standing behind me, scowling.
"Anastasia" he growls.
"Ah, Mr. Grey, so very good to see you again" Javier chimes in.
"Mr. Rodriguez" Christian nods as he stands next to me and pulls me close to him, his arm around my waist, staking his claim.
There are three things Javier has going against him. The first issue is he's a man. Christian does not distinguish the fact that Javier has no sexual interest in me whatsoever and has always been nothing but professional. If he has a penis, he can't touch me. The other problem with Javier is the fact that his last name is Rodriguez. Ever since Jose tried to kiss me, four thousand years ago, Christian has held a grudge against the name. And last, we haven't seen each other in four days, there's a lot of pent up frustration.
Oh, my complicated, brilliant, jealous fifty… love of my life.
I ignore his scowl, turn toward him and kiss him. I missed my jealous husband, the four days apart felt like forever.
"I missed you Mr. Grey"
He pulls me into a hug; I'm sure this show of affection is another territorial tactic on his part and he kisses me again.
"Did you now?" he dryly answers never taking his eyes off Javier.
"Hi Dad. Good flight?" Phoebe chimes in, oblivious to Christian's mood.
"It was fine"
Brooke walks over with the photos of the bouquets Javier requested. She hands me the photos but never takes her eyes off of Christian. Did I just see her lick her lips while she was staring at him?
Put your damn tongue back in your mouth and fuck off bitch; he's old enough to be your father.
"Thank you." I snatch the photos from her, holding them in one hand, latching on the Christian's arm with the other, holding him close. Mine.
The bouquets are stunning; orchids, roses and calla lilies in varying shades of purples and lavenders.
"Bella Phoebe, I have the music playlist from the band. I'd like to go over it with you for final approval. Should only take about a half hour"
"Javier, don't forget my Dad said he wanted to pick the song for our Father/Daughter dance"
"Yes, of course. I remember. We must look over the rest of the playlist."
"Oh, ok. Why don't we go inside the house so we can sit at a table and look it over? Are you coming Mom?"
"I want to speak with your mother first, Phoebe. We'll meet you at the house in a few minutes" Christian answers before I can respond.
Once the three of them are out of earshot, I brace myself because I know what's coming.
"Why were his hands all over you?"
"Christian, he was kissing me on the cheek, in front of our daughter"
"I don't like it" I can see his anger bubbling to the surface.
"Oh please. At least he wasn't salivating at the mouth like his assistant was when she was eye fucking you" Brooke? What kind of name is Brooke? I'd like to drown her in a fucking brook.
He closes his eyes; I know he's silently counting to ten. When he opens them, his eyes are blazing.
"You. Boathouse. Now." he growls.
"Now?"
"This is not a request Anastasia"
~o0o~
Twenty or so minutes later we find Phoebe, Javier and Bitch Whore sitting at the dining room table, reviewing a long list of songs.
"Took you long enough, I was about to send out a search party….Mom, why is your hair braided?"
Shit!
"Oh, the heat was getting to me outside; I braided it while I was talking to your Dad. You know, hot flashes." I lie.
I glance over at Christian with a sly smile. He's smirking, looking very relaxed.
~o0o~
Phoebe, Christian and I are sitting in the back of the SUV while Roger drives us back to the Big House.
"Phoebe, are you getting nervous? In one week, you will be Mrs. Phoebe Richards." I ask.
"Not really. I can't wait to finally marry Matt. Although at work I'm keeping my maiden name"
"Good idea. Smart girl." Christian says.
He said what? I turn toward Christian.
"Are you kidding me? When I wanted to keep my maiden name for work, you went all thermo nuclear and showed up at my office to argue about it."
"That was different"
"How was that different? It's exactly the same."
"It just is." He shrugs.
"That's your answer. It just is?"
"Yes, that's my answer." He raises his brow and smirks.
Damned Hypocrite!
~o0o~
Its Phoebe's wedding day. In my mind I was picturing a leisurely breakfast, then a quick ride over to Grace's house to get dressed and whatever else needed to be done.
Not so much.
Keeping in the tradition that the groom can't see the bride before the ceremony, Phoebe slept in her old bedroom last night, instead of the condo she shares with Matt. She walks into the kitchen in her old blue terry cloth robe with a scowl on her face.
"Phoebe, what's wrong?"
"It's raining"
"I know. They say its good luck to rain on your wedding day."
"Well, I don't know who they are, but they're fucking idiots."
"The weather reports say it's supposed to clear up later today. Don't worry, rain or shine, it's your day and it will be perfect."
She grumbles something under her breath then grabs a muffin off the kitchen counter and goes back to her room. Let's hope her mood improves as the day goes on.
~o0o~
We arrive at Grace's house to begin the wedding day primping. There's so much for the bride's side to do. Hair, make up, photographs, it seems like an endless list. The rain is now a misty drizzle. Hopefully it'll stop soon.
Javier is waiting for us at the front door when we arrive. His Bluetooth is secured in his ear and he's holding a clip board.
"Here is our Bella Bride! Come, we have a busy day ahead." He grabs her hand and whisks her off to a bedroom where a team of hairstylists are waiting. Some are already working on the bridesmaids' hair. Ava, her Matron of Honor looks so pretty with her strawberry blonde hair French braided with tiny baby's breath tucked in it. Mia's girls Olivia and Emma, Maddie and Phoebe's oldest friend Jennifer are the bridesmaids and are all getting the same hairstyling.
There's three make up artists lined up after hair. It's never ending primping.
Bitch Whore, I mean, Brooke is out on the grounds making sure everything is perfect inside the giant tent.
Christian is somewhere in the house with the ring bearer, Raymond. Raymond looks adorable in his black tuxedo with a purple cummerbund and bow tie.
Teddy is at Phoebe's condo with Matt and the other groomsmen. They have it so easy. They just show up.
Roger dropped my Mom and Grace off at the house. Bob hurt his hip and had to stay behind in Georgia.
"Mom, you look lovely. I like your red hat." I kiss my Mom's cheek and hug her.
"Ana honey, I'm a Red Hat Lady. It's what we wear."
'Well it suits you" My Mom spots Raymond and walks over to see him. I turn to Grace and give her a hug. I have to hand it to Grace, for a woman who is almost ninety, she is amazing. She's still sharp as a tack and getting around well.
"Darling Girl, that silver gown is lovely on you."
"Thank you Grace. You look lovely too"
She slyly smiles and leans in close to my ear.
"Did you read in the obituaries that Elena Lincoln died last week? Heart attack I think." she whispers.
"Yes, I read it." Who knew she had a heart?
"Well, ding dong the witch is dead" She grins.
"Grace! You're so bad!" I place my hand over my mouth, unsuccessfully trying to hide my smile.
"Ana, once you're my age, you can say anything you want and get away with it" She smirks and winks at me.
~o0o~
Hair and makeup are done. The bridesmaids look lovely in purple chiffon knee length A-line dresses. I walk into the master bedroom to see how Phoebe is doing and freeze when I see her.
"Well?" she asks.
"Oh baby girl, you look so beautiful. I'm so proud of you. You've grown into such a wonderful woman."
"Mom, is this going to be a repeat of Teddy's wedding? Are you going to cry the whole day?"
"Probably" I laugh as I dab my eyes with the handkerchief Christian gave me earlier. My husband knows me well. "Stand back, I want to look at you"
She looks like a fairy princess in her bridal gown. The dress is stunning. A strapless sweetheart neckline with hundreds of hand embroidered crystals covering the white silk bodice and an exaggerated tulle skirt. Her hair is swept into an updo with a small diamond comb that once belonged to Christian's grandmother holding her veil in the back.
Breathtaking.
"Mom, stop it. You're going to make me cry and ruin my make up"
"I'm sorry. I'll stop." I don't.
There's a knock on the door.
"Come in" I answer.
Christian walks in and stops in his tracks. He takes in a deep breath and holds it, his eyes never leaving Phoebe.
Her lips quiver as soon as their eyes meet. She cocks her head and shyly smiles at him. I've always loved their special bond.
"It's almost time for the ceremony. I'm going to check on your Grandmothers and the groomsmen." I walk to Phoebe and hug her tightly. "I love you so much, baby girl"
"I love you too Mom."
I kiss her cheek, walk over to Christian, kiss his cheek then leave them to have some alone time.
~o0o~
"Phoebe, you look beautiful."
"Thanks Dad" she blushes and looks down to the floor.
"I can't believe my little girl is getting married. It seems like only yesterday we were having tea parties in your bedroom."
"The feather boa really suited you" She grins.
"I was partial to the hot pink boa, but you always claimed that one first".
We laugh. Life certainly was never dull once Phoebe entered our lives.
"Phoebe, are you sure you want to marry this boy? It's not too late."
"Dad, Matt is twenty seven, as old as me. I don't think we can categorize him as a boy. And to answer your question, yes, I'm sure"
"You went through so many boyfriends. I didn't think you would ever find someone who was good enough for you. What did you have, fifty boyfriends?"
"Fifteen before Matt" She rolls her eyes. Nasty habit.
"Fifteen, eh? What made Matt so special?"
"I don't know how to explain it. There was something about him. It called to me on some deep level. I couldn't leave him alone. I'm embarrassed to admit, I stalked him for a month before he finally asked me out."
"You can't help that, stalking is in your genes. Or need I remind you of my stalking your Mother?"
"Oh, I remember. I guess when you find the right one; you do whatever you can to make it happen. Anyway, he makes me happy."
"A happy marriage is all I wish for you. I want you to have what Mom and I have had all these years."
"Thanks Dad"
There's an awkward silence in the room. We're brimming with emotions, but can't find the words to express what we feel.
"Well, I guess it's time to get the show on the road." I say.
"In a minute." She sighs.
"Second thoughts?" She could always move back in with us.
"No, I just want a few more minutes alone with my Dad." She cocks her head and looks up at me. Her quivering lip and glassy eyes say everything I need to know.
I wrap my arms around her and hug her, rocking her back and forth.
"No matter how old you are, married or not, you will always be my little girl." I whisper in her ear.
"I love you Daddy" she looks up to me as tears fall down her cheeks.
"Oh Phoebe, I have loved you your whole life, even before you were born." I croak out as my own tears well up.
~o0o~
The wedding ceremony is about to start. Luckily the rain had stopped and the rest of the day looks to be picture perfect.
Teddy escorts me to my seat. Grace and my Mom are already seated in front.
Raymond looks adorable as the ring bearer, as he walks down the aisle with the wedding bands resting on the little white satin pillow he's carrying.
The bridesmaids look stunning. Their purple dresses with their bouquets looked amazing.
When I see Christian walking Phoebe down the aisle, my tears start again. It's one of those moments in time you wish you could stop, just for a little while and hold on to.
Once they get to the end of the aisle, Christian lifts Phoebe's veil and kisses her sweetly on the cheek. I was able to make out Phoebe mouthing "I love you Daddy", he smiles at her and caresses her cheek, then turns to Matt, shakes his hand and places Phoebe's hand in his.
Christian sits down next to me and holds my hand as we watch Phoebe and Matt promise to live their lives together.
~o0o~
The reception was wonderful. I have to hand it to Javier and Bitch Whore, they did a spectacular job. Each table had tall crystal vases with fuchsia phalaenosis, purple anemone, lilac and lavender roses. The tables looked stunning.
Christian and I mingle among the guests. We travel table to table until we finally meet some very dear old friends.
"I'm glad you were able to make it" Christian says.
"We wouldn't miss this for the world"
"So, how's California treating you?"
"Good. I've taken up surfing."
"An old man, like you?"
"I may be old, but I have the body of a twenty year old. Besides, you're fifty-eight. Do you think that's young?"
"Younger than you. I think the California sun has fried your brain."
"I think all the Seattle rain has made you grouchier."
"Maybe so." Christian laughs.
"I hear you named a dog after me. Missed me that much?"
"The dog came to us named Taylor. It should have been a sign to keep away from him."
Gail and I are smirking at each other, enjoying our husbands' exchange. It's so good to watch Christian and Taylor trade jabs at each other the way old friends do.
Eventually we walk over to the family table. My Mom is happily sipping her third mint julep. Grace is swaying her head back and forth to the music. Christian crouches down to her and kisses her on the cheek.
"Mom, are you ok? Do you need anything?"
"I'm fine. Did you see the rainbow? Your father worked his magic and brought out the sun"
"Rainbows occur after it rains Mom." He shakes his head.
Grace has maintained that since Carrick died, whenever she sees a rainbow, she knows it's him looking over her. Christian thinks this is rubbish, but Grace believes. I think it's sweet and I hope she's right. It's comforting knowing those who've passed are still watching over you.
Christian and Phoebe have been called to the middle of the dance floor for the Father/Daughter dance. I stand at the corner of the dance floor. Teddy stands beside me, with his arm wrapped around my waist, I rest my head on his shoulder and we watch.
Christian's only request regarding music was that he chose the song they danced to.
Billy Joel's "Lullabye" plays. I knew Christian wouldn't choose a traditional song and now I understand why he didn't sing the one lullaby he knew to Teddy's daughter last month. Like he said, he was saving it for another day.
He holds Phoebe tight. The music plays. She rests her head on his chest as they dance. By the end of the song, they both have tears running down their cheeks. There isn't a dry eye in the house.
I look over at Teddy and he's teared up too.
~o0o~
"Phoebe, Matt…we'd like to give you your wedding gift"
"Mr. Grey, the wedding was gift enough." Matt says.
"This is something Ana and I both want. And please, call me Christian."
Ana stands next to me, with her arm wrapped around my waist. I hand Phoebe an envelope. She looks down at it then back up to us.
"Go ahead. Open it"
She carefully opens the envelope and takes out the document inside. Slowly, she opens it. Her eyes open wide as she reads the document in her hand, then she looks back up at us. She shows it to Matt, who looks as stunned as she does.
"This is the deed to Grandma's house."
"Yes it is"
"You are giving us this house?"
"Yes, your Grandmother can't live here anymore. I bought it from her."
"But what about Uncle Elliot and Aunt Mia? Is it ok with them? Do they know?"
"They're fine with it. They're happy the house is staying in the family. I know how much you love this house. It's a great house to raise a family."
"But what about Teddy? He has two small children."
"Ted and Maddie want to remain in Seattle. That's where Raymond's school is. They like living at Escala."
"I never thought you'd give up that penthouse"
"You'd be amazed what I'd give up for someone I love" I glance over at Ana, she smiles at me and tightens her arm around my waist.
"I don't know what to say Mom and Dad. Thank you."
~o0o~
It's the end of a very long day. The wedding was wonderful. Great food, great music, great friends…everything Phoebe and Matt could ever wish for.
Christian and I are in bed. We're resting our heads on our pillows facing each other.
"It's been a long day, Mr. Grey"
"It certainly has, Mrs. Grey"
"The wedding was lovely. Phoebe looked very happy"
"She did."
"After all the boys she's dated, I really do believe she found the right one"
"So do I…but don't tell him. I'd like to keep him on his toes."
I giggle.
"That's still my favorite sound"
"I believe there's another sound you like to hear from me. Are you too tired for a little after wedding fun?"
"Baby, I am never too tired for you"
He pulls me in close to him and kisses me.
May, 2045
"Are you drinking a lemon martini?"
"Yes, I had your sister make one for me."
"Don't you think it's a little early for martinis?"
"Son, I'm well into my nineties. I may not have tonight to drink this."
"That's not funny Mother." I shake my head.
"Oh Christian. Always so serious. You really need to lighten up."
"Is that you or the martini talking?"
"Both" she grins.
"How are you doing?"
"As good as an old lady can be, I suppose. Phoebe passed by the other day with little Christian. He's two and a half and already so smart. I think he's going to run your company by the time he's ten."
I smile at the thought.
"I think you might be right about that."
"Maybe by then you'll finally retire?"
"Never."
"Christian, every day is a gift. Don't waste it all behind a desk."
"There are a few days I'd like to re-gift." I joke.
"Oh Christian, takes some advice from someone who has lived a long life. Take time for yourself. Just you and Ana…or take your entire family. Enjoy life."
"I do enjoy life."
She looks at me and smiles.
"It makes me so happy to hear you say that, because I know you mean it. There was a time where I didn't know if you would ever find happiness."
"I know, Mom. Me too."
She reaches her hand out and holds my hand. I look down, her hands describe her perfectly… frail yet so strong.
She stares out the window.
"What are you thinking about Mom?"
"You."
"What about me?"
"Just how far you've come from the boy I first met at the hospital all those years ago."
"You saved my life Mom."
"Oh son, it was kismet. Fate. Destiny. Whatever you want to call it. We were meant to be together."
"I'm so sorry for my behavior back then. I'm surprised you didn't throw me out"
"Christian, you were a challenge and there were times I wanted to wring your neck…but I loved you from the first time I saw you. I would never give up on you. I never gave up on you."
"I know Mom."
"Ana is very lucky to have you."
"I think you meant to say that the other way around."
"No. She is lucky. Make no mistake, I am forever in Ana's debt for bringing out what I always knew you had inside of you, I love her like a daughter. She saved you from yourself. But don't you see…you saved her too? "
"No. I don't"
"After all these years, she still lights up when she sees you. That girl loves you so much, more than the day you married. For as much happiness as she has brought you, you have given it back to her. That's the kind of love you find once in a lifetime. And after so many years married, she's still hot for you."
"Christ, Mom."
"Christian, I have eyes. I see the way you both look at each other. It's the way your Father and I were."
"Mother, I don't want to hear any of this. Maybe you should lay off the martini; you're losing your filter."
"I'm just speaking the truth; it's a perk for the elderly. I don't worry about the consequences of what I say anymore."
"Lucky us." I roll my eyes.
"I know you have struggled with this your whole life, but know this. You are a good man. A very good man. You have always had a loving heart; you just needed the right person to help you find it. I kept it safe until Ana unlocked it."
"Why are you telling me all of this?"
"I just want you to know that I love you. I will always love you. I'm old; indulge me in my sentimental thoughts."
I kiss her cheek.
"I love you too. Look, I have to get going. I'll see you again in a few days."
"I'd like that." She smiles.
She stands from her chair and hold out her arms.
I hug her and kiss her cheek.
"I love my little boy." She whispers in my ear.
~o0o~
My cell phone buzzes and I check the caller ID. I don't get many calls on a Sunday morning. It's Mia. Instantly I feel a lump in my throat. I know.
Fuck. I know.
"Mia?"
"Christian." Her whisper is barely audible. "It's Mom. She passed away in her sleep last night."
I knew this day was coming and I think she's been trying to prepare the three of us for it for a while, but it doesn't stop the instantaneous pain I feel. Like someone punched me hard in the gut.
"Are you ok?" I ask.
"No." she squeaks out. I can tell she's been crying for a while before she called me.
"Does Elliot know?"
"Yes."
"Ok. I'll be right over."
"Thanks" she whispers.
I end the call and stare down at the floor. I feel like I'm frozen here. I can't move.
Waves of memories flood my head. From the first time I saw her, in her crisp white doctor's jacket, treating me so gently. I thought she was an angel sent from heaven. I know I was right.
I remember my first Christmas with my new family, I hear Mom playing the piano, the tearful look on her face the first time I laughed in our house, our family vacations, her disappointed look every time I fucked up as a teenager.
I think back to the first time I showed her my boat and her surprise when she saw I named it after her and the look of joy on my wedding day.
The rush of memories is overwhelming.
Ana walks in the room and cocks her head.
"What's wrong?"
"My Mom died last night."
"Oh Christian. I'm so sorry." She rushes over to me and holds me.
I hold on to Ana so tight, like she's my life raft and I'm clinging on for dear life.
"I love you Christian. I love you so much. I'm so sorry." She whispers.
"I love you too, baby. Mia needs us over there." I choke out.
"Of course. I'll grab my purse." She says through her tears.
I feel numb. Numb. The rational side of me knows this was a woman well into her nineties. She lived a long life, a good life. But that knowledge doesn't dull the pain of losing her.
Ana and I walk out the door to the car parked in the front driveway. Of fucking course, it's been raining. Fucking Washington. She offers to drive, but I need to focus on something other than my memories.
We arrive at Mia and Ethan's house. I'm a bundle of fucking nerves. At least the fucking rain stopped.
We get out of the car. We're about to walk up to Mia's door and face what's inside when I look up to the sky, searching for the strength to get me through this.
A beautiful double rainbow rising from the earth is arched over Mia's house. I've never seen anything like it.
I think back to my Mother's belief that Carrick looked over her when she saw a rainbow and suddenly feel at peace.