Still alive and loving reviews. =) Sorry I have neglected you for so long fanfiction, but I'm back for a spell!
Um, warning as always on this story, mature content in pretty much every chapter because I'm just citrus-y like that.
Read, enjoy, send a shit ton of reviews!
Also, I apologize for any discrepancies in the story regarding Kagome's parents. Please ignore them and keep reading. Thats the problem with writing like 9 stories at the same time over very long periods of time-its inevitable that you mix shit up. =/ I may fix it eventually but right now I'm more worried about churning out more chapters for you, my loving reviewers. =)
Kagome bit her lip and tried to ignore Kikyou as she whispered something, most likely slutty, into Inuyasha's ear at the lunch table.
"Do you mind? Some of us are trying to eat," Sango growled at Kikyou.
Kikyou glared back, "Oh, I'm sorry, was my conversation interrupting you stuffing your face?"
Sango started to bitch back at her but Inuyasha spoke first, "Kikyou, if you can't have a civil conversation with my friends then you need to stay the hell away from them."
Kikyou sighed, "Whatever, I'll see you in ten minutes or so."
Sango glared in her direction until Kikyou was completely out of sight, "What a bitch."
"You mouthed off first," Inuyasha growled, "It's not like I asked you be her friend but not being a bitch would be nice."
"Why should I be nice when you aren't?" Sango asked sweetly.
Inuyasha snarled, "Whatever, be a bitch I don't care; I'm used to it."
Miroku sighed, "Inuyasha, Sango, both of you; chill the hell out."
Inuyasha stood up, "No need, I've got to go." His eyes collided with Kagome's, because he couldn't help but look at her, and he was shocked but just how much anger and hurt he saw on her face. She was going to hate him before this was all over with… He offered her an apologetic look but she ignored it and looked back down at her plate. With a sigh he turned and walked out of the lunchroom.
"What an asshole," Sango growled, "I can't believe him."
Kagome sighed, "He isn't an asshole, he is Inuyasha, the same person he has always been. We can't bail on him now, after he has told us how worried he was that we wouldn't want to be his friends anymore…this is when he needs friends the most. We can't…help him turn into someone else. We can't give him a reason."
Sango ducked her head guiltily and Miroku nodded solemnly.
Kagome nodded absentmindedly before standing up and following the path Inuyasha had just taken. She turned down the hall where he had turned and started to try and find him; she would check the bathrooms first.
The second boy's bathroom turned out to be the one. She was thankful that she only walked in to find Kikyou sitting on the counter with her shirt off and Inuyasha standing between her legs, she had expected the skank to be naked and Inuyasha to be close to the same state.
They both turned to look at her before Inuyasha cursed and stepped away from the still willing Kikyou.
"Consider yourself cock-blocked," Kagome mumbled, proud of herself for not giving in to the urge to cry.
Kikyou growled, "If he wanted to screw you he would. But he isn't, so get your scrawny little unwanted ass out of here!"
Kagome clenched her jaw but didn't plan on saying a damn word to the girl.
"I said-" Kikyou started again but Inuyasha jerked her off the counter and handed her her shirt before she could continue.
"I don't care who you think you are, don't ever talk to her like that again. Get out, I'm done with you for now," he growled.
Kikyou pouted and started to complain but realized it was pointless when he glared at her again. With a sniff she pulled on the shirt, grabbed her bag, and left the two of them in the bathroom.
"What the fuck, Kagome?" he snarled as soon as the door had shut.
Kagome sighed, "I don't care what you say to me, I'm not going to let you keep acting like this. Whoring around because you can't 'control' yourself; it's not you."
Inuyasha ran a frustrated hand through his hair, "I'm not who I used to be Kagome, the sooner you realize that the better. If I don't 'whore around,' as you put it, I'm going to go fucking ape shit and hurt someone. So you need to back the fuck off and let me do whatever I have to do to stay sane and a least a little like the old Inuyasha."
Kagome rolled her eyes, "I don't believe for a second that you can't handle this, or that sleeping with every girl in the school is your only option. I'm going to follow you Inuyasha, be with you every minute, so you are either going to screw in front of me or not at all."
He growled, "Kagome, listen to me, this shit isn't going to work! I've already gone four hours without any fucking sort of release and I'm getting pissy; I'm not going to last much longer without making a complete ass out of myself and doing something unforgivable!"
Kagome found herself blushing for a moment as her mind registered his comment about 'releases', and then she found herself frowning. "Four hours? You have to do it every four hours?"
Inuyasha sighed, "You're missing the fucking point."
"Stop cussing at me," she glared at him.
The bell rang and they both stood there for a moment in silence.
"You're late," Inuyasha murmured.
"So are you," she quipped. "I can handle not being at class on time; I told you I was staying with you."
He grumbled and turned his back to her so that he could resituate the monster in his pants. He was so hard it hurt and he could already feel a serious case of blue balls coming on. With the creature as hidden as possible, he pulled his bag onto his shoulder and turned to glare at his best friend.
"I need you to promise me something Kagome," he said as he closed the distance between, instantly sending his heart and libido back into overdrive, if they had ever actually calmed in the first place.
"What?" she asked softly, wondering when Inuyasha had gotten so tall.
"If I tell you that I need you to get away from me, to run…promise me you will do it," he couldn't look at her when he said it.
Kagome blinked, "If I did that, you could get rid of me anytime you wanted to go screw some slut."
He growled and moved closer, using his body to drive his point home as he towered over her. He was bigger and stronger than she was and she needed to realize that, fast. "I don't want to hurt you…and my brother has informed me that if I wait too long that is exactly what I will do. Now, if I tell you that you need to get your cute little ass as far away from me as possible, then you need to fucking do it without thinking or arguing."
Kagome swallowed nervously but didn't budge, "I won't run away when you need someone the most."
His fist had collided with the tiled wall of the bathroom before he had realized that he had thrown it, "Would you just LISTEN TO ME!"
She looked at the cracked tile and then back to him, "Inuyasha…don't wait until it is too late…please. Just let me….help you…"
He clenched his jaw so hard he heard something crack and knew by the way her eyes widened that she had too. "Are you asking me to fuck you again?"
She flinched at the word and noted that Inuyasha's temper was getting too hot too fast, his face was turning red…his hands were shaking… "Yes but I'm not asking you to enjoy it."
He laughed and it wasn't a laugh she had ever heard come from him before.
"Oh I would enjoy it but you damn sure wouldn't. You would need it soft and slow Kagome and it would still hurt, but I can't be either of those... I can't give you gentle, no matter how much I want to or how much you deserve it. Don't make the offer again, because if you keep me like this much longer I might just take you up on it and do something we will both regret later."
Kagome blinked, this was too much to take in at once. He wanted to? He would enjoy it? "Why did you tell me 'no' the other night? Because you don't want to have sex with me or because you think it would hurt me?"
"I KNOW it would hurt you," he hissed.
She took a deep breath, feeling so happy she wanted to run up to the infuriated demon in front of her and hug him. He may be an idiot but he was her idiot, and he was still trying to do the right thing in an ass backwards sort of way.
"Kiss me," she whispered.
Inuyasha turned from where he had been pacing around the bathroom and stomped over to her, "No Kagome, stop this shit!"
"Do it," she said, quieter but no less determined.
"No," he snarled but his arms were reaching for her against his will, he needed to shake some sense into her.
"Just…do it," the words were almost as soft as a sigh.
He shook his head and clenched his jaw, and then his lips were against hers. This was no light press of lips like her other kisses with boys had been. Inuyasha's lips were pressed against hers with a bruising force and his sharp canines pressed into her lips. His hand found her hair and he knotted his fingers in it to give her head a soft jerk backwards, making her gasp into his mouth and opening her lips to his invasion.
Kagome's eyes couldn't decide if they wanted to widen to the size of dinner plates or clench shut so tight that all she could see was black. As his lips ground against hers and she held her mouth open for him, she let his tongue dominate her own and struggled to keep up with his movements. He was rough, and she shouldn't have liked it, but she found herself whimpering and wrapping her arms around his neck.
Inuyasha groaned as Kagome completely relaxed into him, he didn't intend to lift her up against him, or to sit her on the countertop while he did his best to kiss her senseless, or to pull her legs apart and move so that his hips were cradled perfectly between them.
Kagome's eyes flew open when she felt her air hit high on her thighs and Inuyasha hard length against the thin material of her underwear. He rolled his hips against her and she bit her lip to keep from crying out as her body caught fire in a way it hadn't ever before.
"Inuyasha…please," she cried out in a breathy voice, tearing her lips away from his, "not here…take me home if you…need to…"
He panted and fought the urge to silence her with his mouth, she had no idea how bad she had fucked up when she had asked him to kiss her….or when she had let him, but he didn't care about that anymore. All he cared about was getting her naked and underneath him.
He growled, "Kagome…you don't…understand…"
"I think I understand perfectly," she said calmly, if somewhat breathlessly.
He started to say something when the bathroom door swung open and the history teacher walked in with a glare.
"I was informed that two students were behaving inappropriately in the boy's bathroom but I honestly never expected you to be one of the students, Kagome" he said.
Inuyasha stepped away from her and resisted the irrational urge to jump on the man and beat the shit out of him until the guy left him alone to claim his mate, as was his right. "She won't be doing it again." He assured the teacher in a rough voice. "It's my fault she is here; she shouldn't be punished."
Kagome glared at Inuyasha and straightened her clothes before looking back at the teacher, "I chose to be here, I am prepared to accept the consequences of my actions."
The teacher shook his head at both of them, "Let's go to the principal's office, both of you."
As they both picked up their bags and followed the teacher out of the bathroom Inuyasha hissed under his breath at his stupid, beautiful, perfect, brave, sweet friend, "You should have kept your mouth shut."
She snorted, "As if, I told you I was going to stay with you no matter where you went; that includes the principal's office."
"Goddamn it, do you really think I'm going to get laid at the school's main office?" he snarled.
She raised an eyebrow at him mockingly but the teacher shushed them before she could reply.
Two hours later, they were both still sitting in the office waiting while Inuyasha's parents spoke to the principal; Kagome's mom had been unavailable and frankly she was hoping she could get home before her to delete the message off their answering machine.
Inuyasha's father came out of the office with his arm around his mother and they nodded their goodbyes to the grouchy principal.
"You've been dismissed from classes today but I convinced him not to put it in your records," his father said to the two waiting teens.
Kagome blushed and nodded, "Thank you very much, Sir."
Inuyasha's mother smiled gently and patted the girl on the shoulder, "Don't worry dear, I was caught doing much worse with the man I was with before I met Inuyasha's father. The embarrassment passes."
The man next to her snorted, "There was no man before me."
She grinned and leaned against his side, "Of course, dear."
Inuyasha sighed, "I'll drive Kagome home and then I am going to go work out."
The couple nodded and his mother leaned over to wrap her arm around his waist as they all stared to leave the office, "That will be just fine, dear."
Kagome watched in wonder as the tiny woman tugged both of the big demon men on either side of her closer and linked her arms with theirs while telling them about her ideas for their dinner menu that night. Kagome saw Inuyasha's fathers eyes grow heavy lidded with contentment and affection; all the demon did was smile and nod at his mate the entire way out of the building. Their relationship had always made Kagome yearn for one of her own, just as blissfully in love and happy.
The demon on her other arm however seemed anything but happy and content, however he didn't pull away from her or growl at her as Kagome knew he would have with anyone else.
After the older couple had said their farewells and Inuyasha's mother had gave Kagome a reassuring hug they left and Kagome climbed quietly into Inuyasha's car before she decided to speak.
"You can drive to my house but I won't be staying there unless you are too," she said softly.
He growled under his breath, "Then you can just sit at the gym and be bored to tears for a few hours. Maybe then you will change your mind about this stupid plan."
"Don't count on it," she said softly, "oh, can we go by my house anyway so I can get some gym clothes and pack an overnight bag?"
The car almost swerved into oncoming traffic, "What the fuck do you need an overnight bag for?"
"I plan on sleeping on your couch for a while," she said calmly and played with the dials on his radio in hopes of finding something she actually wanted to listen to.
He muttered a string of curses but headed to her house.
When they got there she refused to budge until he gave her the keys and agreed to go in with her.
Kagome hurriedly packed herself a bag before changing into a pair of short shorts and a tank top and then going and deleting the school's message off the answering machine. She returned to the living room to find Inuyasha sitting tensely on the couch.
"I'm ready," she said softly and felt her stomach do a few flips as he looked up at her, looked up and down her body with hungry eyes, and then clenched his jaw and jerkily stood up to walk to the door.
He didn't say another word the whole way there, not even when they got out and he changed in the dressing rooms quickly while she waited just outside the door. Was he fighting the demon inside him or was her annoying motherly behavior already driving him insane?
She watched as he slipped on a pair of boxing gloves and proceeded to immediately start beating the shit out of the punching bag. She stared at him with her mouth open for a few minutes before going and climbing on a treadmill so she could at least pretend to work out while she watched him. He had never looked so good to her before; eyes focused, muscles flexing and stretching as he swiftly moved around the bag. Thank goodness the thing wasn't alive or he would have killed it by now.
Two hours had passed before she realized he had yet to pause for a break and her legs were hurting. She sighed and moved off of her machine so she could slowly walk over to the vending machine and buy them both a bottle of water.
Inuyasha paused mid-swing when she walked up and stood next to him.
"Here," she said, "just because you aren't tired doesn't mean you can't get dehydrated."
He seriously doubted he could, at least not for another few hours, but he took the bottle and downed it before taking off his gloves and moving over to the treadmill. He felt bad that she had already been here two hours and was probably exhausted but he couldn't stop and take her home to rest knowing what the repercussions would be if he left here any less than exhausted himself.
Kagome watched dubiously as her friend cranked up the speed on the treadmill until he was running full out. He was as much a machine as the piece of equipment under his feet. "Do you usually work out like this?"
He glanced at her for a moment before focusing back on the room in front of him, "I usually work out for a few hours but I plan on doing a lot more tonight. Maybe you should get your homework out of the car and work on it while you wait."
She noted he was barely even breathing heavy, "Promise not to go anywhere while I'm gone?"
"I won't get off this thing," he said and handed her the keys.
Kagome grudgingly went and got her homework, unsure she would actually be able to get any work done with the tempting view of him straining and sweating so readily available in front of her. She sat down on a bench in the corner and started to diligently work while Inuyasha's legs ate up another hour and a half and 15 miles.
Yawning, she looked up and found Inuyasha standing at the water fountain refilling his bottle before drinking the entire thing and refilling it again. She stretched and started to walk towards him but something stopped her.
A girl, one she vaguely recognized from school, had just moved in close to Inuyasha and was leaning forward on her tiptoes to say something in his ear as her hands rested on his chest. Kagome felt a quick stab of pain in her chest before she swallowed it and walked calmly over to her friend as she watched his eyes darken.
"When do you think you could make that happen?" the girl asked huskily before taking his water bottle and drinking from it.
Inuyasha had already known Kagome was heading this way so he wasn't surprised when she stopped to stand next to him and Ms. Hug from his gym experience a few days ago.
"Make what happen?" Kagome asked with a perky smile.
The girl glanced at Kagome but didn't seem terribly bothered. She handed the water back to him and smiled at Kagome, "I was just asking Inuyasha when he would be free to help me and my friend wash our backs again, and you are?"
Inuyasha hated himself as he watched Kagome's face turn a shade whiter.
"You and your friend, huh?" she mumbled and gave Inuyasha a forced fake smile, "I had no idea Inuyasha was so good at multitasking. I am Kagome."
He bit his cheek and looked away to avoid meeting her eyes. He didn't know if he wanted the conversation to continue so Kagome would give up on him and leave or if he wanted to shut the girl up so Kagome wouldn't ever hear about any of it.
"Oh, you have no idea. I'm still all fuzzy and yummy, and it was like two days ago," the girl giggled and turned back to Inuyasha so she could lean up to kiss him. He turned at the last second so she only caught his cheek.
"I'm probably going to be busy for a while," he quietly, "so you should probably find someone else to help."
The girl pouted, "Ok, but I'll keep a shower on standby just in case."
He nodded and she gave Kagome an obliviously genuine smile before walking off.
Kagome gave him a weak smile and tried not to look as bothered as she was, "You get around fast."
He sighed, "Yeah."
She nodded more to herself than to him, "Yeah…well I'm done with my homework; so I'm ready to leave when you are."
His chest ached for her, he hated what he had done, who he had become, and he hated that it was his fault she was in pain. But he didn't exactly have a whole lot of choices. After he had ambushed her at her house and molested her in the school bathroom he was surer now than ever that he needed to stay away from her; he had no control around her.
"We can leave now," he said.
She gave him another nod and went to her backpack without saying another word. Things were so much worse than she had thought. Inuyasha…he had changed so much…
They climbed in the car and he sighed, "I told you that you were making a mistake. I didn't want you to see the ugly side of this shit."
"Well it doesn't get much uglier than that," she mumbled, "so I guess it shouldn't bother you anymore that I'm following you around."
He gritted his teeth at the hollow tone of her voice and decided they would both be better off if he just stopped talking.
"You had sex…right before you came to my house, didn't you?" she asked softly.
His teeth were beginning to hurt from all the grinding and clenching, "Yeah."
"With two girls," she said.
He nodded.
"At the gym," she mumbled.
He slowly nodded again.
"Who was the other girl?" she asked hating that her voice cracked in the middle of her question.
Inuyasha couldn't look at her.
She swallowed the knot in her throat, "Oh God…please tell me you know her fucking name."
He flinched as she cussed but didn't reply. Kagome never said things like that.
Kagome couldn't hold it back any longer, she sobbed and wiped quickly at her tears, but they just kept coming. "D...do you k…know the other one's n…n…ame?"
His hands clenched tighter on the steering wheel and she stared at him as more tears started to slide down her cheeks. "How c…could you do that? Why d…did you let this happen!"
He growled and pulled the car over before turning to face her in the seat and grabbing her arms so she was forced to look at him instead of wipe her eyes. "Listen to me," he snarled, "no, I don't fucking know either one of their names and I don't ever want to! I needed to get off and they were there with their legs spread. Yes it fucking sucks and it's disgusting, but I did it, and I'd have done it again today if you hadn't been with me. I'm not your fucking friend anymore, wake up and realize that!" He released her with a push and sat back in his seat.
She was sobbing in earnest now and it hurt so bad she didn't even try to pretend she wasn't screaming inside.
"Just leave Kagome. Get out while you still can, because I'm still the same guy that lost his virginity to a couple of strangers in a gym shower- I'd do it again and I'm just going to hurt you again. I got off on that shit. I don't care if you hate me, just go." His voice was quiet now.
"I don't want to hear it," she mumbled.
He looked back up at her, "You don't understand; your over there crying and all I can think about is pulling you into my lap and fucking you. I want to kiss you with the same mouth that was eating that chick's pussy not two days ago-"
She slapped him.
He didn't touch his stinging cheek or move away; he deserved every bit of her anger.
"Just shut the hell up, Inuyasha. You aren't going to use this to make me hate you. I'm not leaving. Even if you are acting like a callous asshole, even if you are sleeping with everything that walks past you, even if you think you are beyond saving. I'm. Not. Leaving." She hissed, now just as angry as she was hurt. "You're hurting yourself just as much as you are hurting me by talking like that. So why don't you avoid being disgusting on purpose from now on and drive us back to your house."
He didn't really have a whole lot of things he could say to that so he started to drive again in silence. Again he was torn in his feelings about Kagome; he couldn't even decide if he was thankful she was still staying or pissed off that she was still cock blocking him
He pulled into the driveway and Kagome quietly wiped her face free of tears and makeup in the mirror before she took a deep breath and grabbed her bags, uncaring or oblivious that he was watching her.
"Kagome," he started as he followed her up to the front door.
She didn't break her stride, "I wonder what your mom settled on for dinner, I'm going to pray it was the lasagna; she makes the best lasagna in the world."
He cursed under his breath and followed her inside his house.
His mom was tying her hair up in a ponytail while she jogged down the stairs. She grinned as she finished and stopped next to them; Inuyasha watched her smile dull as she took in Kagome's face. She knew something was wrong. How she could tell that he wasn't sure but he saw the knowledge in her eyes.
"Kagome! This is lovely; I had no idea we would be seeing you for dinner," she pulled the girl into a hug. "Luckily I made lasagna! That is your favorite if I remember correctly?"
Kagome nodded quietly and smiled but Inuyasha could see the tears brimming her eyes again.
His mother did too, she gently wiped the tears from the edge of Kagome's eyes with delicate thumbs, "Well granted I am a marvelous chef but I don't believe it's worth crying over." She chuckled and Kagome couldn't help but laugh a little too. She wrapped an arm around the girl and started steering her to the kitchen, "I don't suppose I could talk you into helping me with the salad could I?"
Kagome nodded and they continued to walk with his mothers arm around Kagome's shoulders despite the fact that Kagome was a few inches taller than her. Just before they turned the corner his mother shot him a knowing glare and Inuyasha ducked his head.
"Take Kagome's things up to your room, she can stay up there for the night while you take the couch. That seems fair since she is your guest," the woman said softly but Inuyasha didn't miss the edge of steel in her tone, she was pissed.
He nodded. He wouldn't have argued with her even if he had wanted to.
The two women disappeared from sight and Inuyasha's father slipped out of the bathroom with a sigh and a chuckle, "I know that tone of voice. Your mother is going to make someone suffer tonight."
Inuyasha grunted his agreement.
"Looks like you drew the short straw, this may be a little mean but I am so glad it wasn't me. Last time she growled at me like that I had to sleep on the couch for three nights," the older man laughed and grabbed the remote control off the coffee table. "Just give her some time to cool down before you try to talk to her and DEFINITELY don't defend yourself in any way, shape, or form."
Like he had any right to defend himself, Inuyasha thought as he grabbed his and Kagome's bags and jogged up the stairs. He showered and stayed in his room until his mother yelled that dinner was ready.
"Shall we discuss what my bonehead of a son has done now?" Inuyasha's mother asked softly as she and the girl reached the kitchen.
Kagome shook her head, "No, I'm just…overreacting. It was my fault anyway."
The woman handed Kagome the lettuce, tomatoes, croutons, and salad dressing, "How about you tell me and let me be the judge of that. I've known you for years and every time I have seen you cry you have had a good reason for it."
Kagome started to pour all the ingredients into a large bowl as she watched Inuyasha's mother check on the lasagna in the oven, "I haven't ever had sex with Inuyasha." Inuyasha's mother had been just like a mother to her since she had been in junior high; she was only vaguely uncomfortable talking about sex with the woman. "Even though that's what it looked like today. We had never even kissed before that."
She paused a moment before shutting the oven door, "Ok. Is that why you are upset?"
Kagome shook her head as she mixed the salad and sprinkled dressing over it all, "Since the whole demon thing he has been…uh…sleeping with a lot of other girls."
The woman nodded, she had known that much would happen. She had also guessed Kagome, who had been by her son's side for almost a decade, wouldn't take it well.
"I was jealous, even though I shouldn't be…and I was hurt. He kept saying things like he had to; it was either that or hurt…someone else. I know he has changed but I don't believe that that is an ok excuse to sleep with every girl that walks past him and smiles at him. He may be different… but he does have some control… so I sort of screwed myself over and told him I was going to follow him around constantly after that… We went to the gym today and some girl came up and started being slutty, and it turns out he had already had sex with her…and there were a few other things…but that is why I am upset."
After stirring the potatoes the woman turned to look at her, "I am in no way defending Inuyasha whoring around…but not having sex isn't an option for him. I understand everything you are feeling and as his mother I find it hard just to watch it all, like I did with Sesshomaru, but there isn't a whole lot I can do. If I could lock him in his room until the phase passed I would."
Kagome nodded, "It really was my fault. I insisted on being there with him; I should have been more prepared to see the realistic side of it. I just…he didn't even know her name. How could he do such important things with people who don't matter to him?" She was crying again and she hated it.
"Boys aren't like girls, honey, they just don't think the same way as we do. Sex generally comes before love for them and they damn sure don't put as much emphasis on the importance of sex alone. It's just fun for them. And Inuyasha is in an even more primal and pleasure-seeking state of mind right now than other human boys at his age," the woman pulled Kagome into a hug and held her. It broke her heart to see the young girl so upset and hurt over her son's actions; there were so many things she would change if she had the chance. "I don't know if you are still thinking of Inuyasha as strictly a friend but I want you to know that if you do intend to keep him away from other girls you are going to have to give him an alternative. It truly bothers me to say things like that…but he isn't going to get better for a while Kagome and he won't ever go back to the same Inuyasha he was before. So unless you plan on dating him you need to back off and try not to let how he acts bother you. I'm not telling you to go sacrifice yourself to my son's desires…I'm just saying that maybe if you don't end up dating, in time you will get used to the other girls."
Kagome wanted to cry harder; she had offered Inuyasha an alternative and every time she did he threw it back in her face.
The woman lifted the hem of her apron so she could wipe Kagome's cheeks before giving each one a delicate kiss, "Go get cleaned up in the bathroom, dinner is ready and the boys will be in here in a few minutes."
Kagome nodded and went to go try and collect herself in the bathroom.
Inuyasha took a deep breath as he walked down the stairs and headed for the dinner table. His body was tired but nowhere near tired enough. The raging hard on he had tucked under the waistband of his pants was a testament to that.
He walked into the kitchen to find his mother spreading out the plates and Sesshomaru already sitting in his seat with his fork in one hand. Kagome walked back into the room and Inuyasha felt himself take a step towards her before he realized what had done and took back that little bit of control she had made him lose. She smelled fucking amazing and he was going crazy from it.
"Save it for after dinner, Inuyasha," Sesshomaru grumbled and mumbled his thanks to their mom when she loaded up his plate for him.
Inuyasha managed to hold back the snarl so that all that escaped was a low growl. Kagome looked at him nervously and then sat down in the chair next to the place he always sat, just like she always had. He slowly moved over and sat down next to her, unable to stop the clenching and unclenching of his hands as he fought the desire to drag her from the room.
"Oh, that looks great honey!" his dad said and kissed his mother's cheek before he sat down and took the plate she had made for him.
His mother gave her husband a little grin before going back to her task and sitting a plate down in front of Inuyasha.
"So how was the gym?" his dad asked around his mouthful of food.
Inuyasha saw Kagome tense out of the corner of his eye and he suddenly felt the urge to growl at his father, "Ok, I guess." Like the three male demons of the family hadn't all smelled the tears Kagome had been crying or heard snippets of their conversation whenever they had raised their voices.
His mother came to his rescue, "Speaking of the gym, I was thinking of signing us up for one of those family plans. They are cheaper that way and we could all go work out together if we wanted to!"
Sesshomaru groaned and Inuyasha's dad raised an eyebrow.
"I'm not entirely sure I like the idea of my woman prancing around all sweaty and sexy in those tight clothes in front of all those other men," the older man grumbled, "I'd hate to have to kill another human over you."
"Another?" Kagome mumbled to Inuyasha.
Inuyasha couldn't help but give a small smile at Kagome's horrified expression, "He is full of shit."
"Dear, don't talk about your father that way… at least not when he is within earshot," their mother smiled serenely as she sat down and started on her own plate.
Sesshomaru snorted at that and their father sent the demon a mock glare.
"Don't think either one of you two are too big for a spanking. I may not bend you over my knee but I can definitely find another way to kick your asses," the male mumbled darkly.
"Honey, please don't cuss at the dinner table," their mother placidly added again.
Kagome smiled at the families antics, at least until she looked up and found Sesshomaru's eyes lingering on her. She gave him a nervous questioning look.
"So, Kagome, I hear you like to spend your free time in the boys bathroom now," Sesshomaru said softly.
Kagome felt Inuyasha suddenly grow still beside her.
Sesshomaru grinned, "That's really classy! I mean, if I had known that when I went through the transition? We could have totally-"
Kagome's eyes widened as Inuyasha suddenly was on top of his brother in the floor on the other side of the table. She hadn't even seen him move.
"Boys!" their mother scolded as the two thrashed and a chair went skidding across the floor before falling on its side. Someone's foot got caught on the table cloth and all the dishes on Sesshomaru's side of the table plummeted to the floor food and all.
"I've got it," the older male said before he started to push the two apart. He caught a fist to the chin and snarled before grabbing them both by the forehead and shoving them apart. "Take this shit outside!"
The two boys glared at each other a second before they both left the room and silently headed for the backyard.
"Honey, are you ok?" Kagome watched the woman run over to her husband to investigate his chin.
He grinned, "I have had a lot worse if you recall."
She rolled her eyes and turned to clean up the plates that had been knocked into the floor during the struggle. After grabbing a broom and dust pan she started sweeping up the wasted food and broken glass.
"I'm going to go outside and make sure they don't kill each other," Inuyasha's father said cheerfully. Kagome's eyes widened even further and she quickly followed him out of the house.
They found Inuyasha and Sesshomaru again on the ground struggling to gain dominance over the other. But it seemed just when one of them managed to get atop the other and land a few good blows, the one on the bottom would find a way to trade their positions. The sounds of dull thuds, grunting, growling, and scraping filled the air.
Kagome watched in horror as Inuyasha took a solid hit to the jaw and fell back on the ground in a daze a second before shaking out of it and punching his brother, who was sitting on top of him, in the side. Sesshomaru grunted and wheezed and Inuyasha took advantage of the other demons pause and switched their positions.
"Why aren't you stopping them?" she asked when she saw blood start to gush from Sesshomaru's nose.
Their father gave her a calm smile, "A few reasons. One, they tend to do this occasionally and it's only after these sessions that the two of them ever really get along for a while. Two, Sesshomaru knew what he was doing when he mouthed off. And three, Inuyasha needed to blow off a lot of steam or risk losing control."
She nodded and thought about his words while the two rolled, punched, shoved, elbowed, and even occasionally clawed at each other for another ten minutes. The reasons behind letting the mayhem continue made sense but that didn't mean she enjoyed watching it.
Just when she had decided she couldn't take anymore the two demons fell apart and failed to get back up to start the fight again; Inuyasha and Sesshomaru were both sprawled on their backs on the grass, chests heaving.
Inuyasha turned his head to the side and, to Kagome's horror, spit out blood.
Sesshomaru grinned cockily but at the same time reached up to touch his tender, bleeding nose.
Kagome noted the various scratches and bruises that coated both demons and the grins that she caught creeping back across their lips.
"Almost beat your ass," Inuyasha wheezed.
Sesshomaru grunted a laugh, "You didn't stand a chase."
Inuyasha grinned at the sky, "Lying is sin big brother."
"Fuck off," Sesshomaru hissed.
This time Inuyasha laughed before wincing and clutching his side, "That was almost better than sex."
Sesshomaru grimaced, "Queer."
"Pussy," Inuyasha offered back.
"Jerk off," Sesshomaru mumbled.
"Asshole," Inuyasha quipped.
Kagome rolled her eyes and turned to say something to their dad only to realize he had gone back into the house at some point.
"I bet you can't even get up," Sesshomaru taunted as he cringed and tried to sit up.
"I bet I can beat your bruised ass into the house," Inuyasha growled.
The two both struggled to their feet and forced their bodies into a brisk walk into the house while weakly pushing at each other. Sesshomaru managed to push Inuyasha over just before he himself tripped and fell face first onto the porch next to his little brother.
"I win."
Inuyasha snorted at his brother, "How can you win when you're kissing the pavement?"
"It takes a certain finesse. You have to be born with it and you, my brother, were not. I inherited all the family finesse."
The two coughed and laughed together for a moment.
"Should I go get you guys some water…or Tylenol…or wheelchairs?" Kagome asked, disturbed by their 'normal' behavior.
"Might need to get that bitch a wheelchair," Inuyasha grunted.
"Might need to get that faggot a cast or two, because I'm going to break his legs," Sesshomaru said happily.
"I'm going inside," Kagome mumbled and left the two demons still bleeding and panting outside on the ground.
The two bazaar boys' mother smiled when she came in, "How bad are they? They lasted longer than usual tonight."
"That's because Inuyasha can actually hold his own with the transition riding him," her husband said as he walked past them and carried a plate of leftovers into the living room to eat on the couch.
Kagome sighed, "They both look terrible."
"Speak for yourself," Inuyasha licked his busted lip and said from behind her as he walked into the room while bracing his weight against the wall. "I look like a stone cold fox."
Sesshomaru raised his eyebrow at her, "And I look like a sex god. Clearly you are confused Higurashi." The skin around his left eye was already turning blue and starting to swell. "I call the first shower!" he suddenly announced.
Inuyasha cursed and headed for the living room while his older brother started for the stairs.
"Stay off the furniture, honey, blood stains are hard to get out of fabric!" their mother said with a smile as she put the finishing touches on the dining room she had just returned back to normal.
"This is insane," Kagome mumbled, "I'm going to go do homework or something."
Kagome had gone upstairs after that; still reeling from the sight of seeing both Inuyasha and Sesshomaru so banged up. She had never actually seen a real fight before and she suddenly found herself praying she never saw another brotherly one either. She had just managed finish all her math homework when Inuyasha staggered in the open door to his room.
She looked up at him from where she was perched on his bed and instantly felt her heart's rhythm pick up speed.
"Just grabbing some clothes to change into," his voice had almost completely lost that breathy quality that it had taken up after the fight and was back to its usual deep tone.
Kagome nodded and tried to pretend she wasn't watching him move as he slowly dug through his dresser drawers.
"I can't find my fucking pajama bottoms," he grumbled more to himself than to her.
She was grateful for the excuse to talk to him, "Where did you leave them last?"
He shrugged and shuffled around the room kicking over the various piles of clothes on his floor. "Somewhere down here."
"Are they clean?" she asked only mildly disturbed by the boy's hygiene habits.
"For the most part," he said and continued to search.
Kagome nodded, "Check under the bed, I'm sure half your closet is down there."
He looked dubiously at the floor and touched his side, "I think I'll just wear some old boxers that aren't too dirty."
She realized he didn't want to kneel because he was still sore and she got up and knelt down in the floor, "Here, I'll do it."
"No," he growled only to suddenly grow silent behind her.
Kagome looked up from her seat on the floor and felt her eyes widen at the hungry look her friend was now wearing. She was so thankful she had actually sat in the floor instead of bending over at the waist in front of him. "Inuyasha?"
He cleared his throat and started to back away, "Forget the pants."
He was out of the room before she could say another word.
Kagome didn't see him again before she turned off the lights and went to bed. It upset her to think that he was avoiding her in his own home, after they had fallen asleep together many a night beside each other on this bed, but as long as he wasn't out roaming the town she guessed she could cope.
She rolled over in the bed trying to get comfortable while ignoring the scent of Inuyasha all over the pillow underneath her and ended up with her eyes rested on the shut door. She had debated on locking it, just because she was a little scared of the repercussions, but in the end had decided that if he really wanted in a lock wasn't going to stop him and neither was she. She tried to relax and sleep but each time she shut her eyes she was haunted by imagines of Inuyasha surrounded by naked girls and brutally pumping away between the legs of one of them.
The taste of blood told her she had bitten her lip just a little too hard and she took a couple of deep breaths. She was just being silly. She rolled over again and wrapped her arms around the other pillow on his full sized bed.
Had he ever slept with someone here? Right where she was laying now? Bile rose in her throat and she had to will the urge to puke away. She was just…being…silly.
Inuyasha had awoken for the third time that night in just as many hours and much to his dismay, every time he woke up he found it just a little bit harder to force himself to remain on the couch and not climb the stairs to his room, his bed, and his woman. God her body had probably even picked up the scent of him from his sheets. Granted the scent wasn't anywhere near as permanent as it would have been, say from sex, but it still pleased him that she carried his scent.
He slid off the couch, rationalizing that he was just going to check on her and make sure she was ok. Pretending that he wasn't as hard as granite, he silently climbed the stairs; each new step made his heart pound a little faster. Inuyasha cussed every word in the book silently as he paused at the top of the stairs and tried to take back some of his control.
A low whimper coming from his room made his heart and his dick jump. He didn't remember any of the steps between the top of the staircase and his bedroom door but he must of taken them because he was suddenly standing there looking over at where she was tossing and turning on the bed.
"Inuyasha…please…" she mumbled and he fought the urge not to pounce on her.
"Please…" she was begging.
He walked over to the edge of the bed and resisted the urge to touch her.
She sobbed, "Please don't…don't do this…"
Inuyasha staggered like he had been hit. Suddenly all the hints he had ignored began to add up. She didn't smell of desire, only fear and pain. He could see a wet shine of tears on her cheeks. Kagome wasn't dreaming of the two of them having sex, like he had so many times, she was dreaming of him raping her.
"No…" she whispered. "No!" her voice was louder now, and clear, as if she were wide awake and speaking to him.
He hadn't thought it possible but his dick was suddenly the very opposite of hard. He probably couldn't get an erection if he walked downstairs and found a girl naked and bent over the couch waiting for him. Kagome was terrified. She was scared…of him.
On silent feet he ran to the bathroom and fell in front of the toilet just in time to puke up the remnants of his dinner. He was never having sex again, ever. He gagged again and clutched at the toilet seat. Kagome…he had to get away from her, had to keep her safe. He wouldn't let his presence be the cause of such torture for her. Another wave of nausea hit him but he had little left to vomit. An image popped into his mind of him on top of Kagome, sliding inside her while she screamed and thrashed, proved his assumption wrong; he still had plenty left to throw up.
Inuyasha wasn't sure how long he lay there, hugging the toilet like it was a lifeline, before the nausea finally left him and he could go back to the couch. He walked out into the hall and ran into his father.
His dad looked down at him with worried eyes, "What's wrong?"
Inuyasha shook his head and looked everywhere but at his dad's eyes. Hell, the man would probably be ashamed of him; God knew he was ashamed of himself.
His father's hands came up to clasp his shoulders, "It won't be like this forever. This night…won't last forever. Do what you have to do to get away from Kagome tomorrow before the two of you end up destroying each other."
He nodded silently; he had decided on the same thing minutes ago.
Kagome ate her cereal silently on the couch while Inuyasha got ready for school. Upon seeing him she had decided that he had slept just as great as she had; the dark circles under their eyes were almost matching shades, though he did seem a little paler.
He came down the stair stairs and pulled a red beanie on over his ears, "Are you ready to go?"
"Don't you want to eat?" she asked softly.
His hand went to his stomach before he shook his head, "Nah, I'm good."
"Your mom said…" she started only to stop when she saw the look in his eyes. Something had happened to her hanyou. His expression was cold, and distant, and determined, and filled with anger. He didn't even look like the same person. How could she have lost him over night?
"Let's go," he said and headed for the door, like he just assumed she would follow.
Kagome hurried to take her bowl to the kitchen and pour some water in it before running out and climbing in the already started car.
They had driven half the way in silence before she could hold it anymore, "What's wrong with you? Why are you upset?"
Inuyasha looked over at her for a second before looking back at the road. How could she look so beautiful even when she was exhausted from running from him all night in her sleep? "Nothing. I have nothing to be upset about. We have had what, ten years of good times? Neither one of us have anything to be upset about. You were the best best friend a guy could ask for."
She swallowed nervously and felt her heart kick up in fear the more he spoke. This sounded…like a goodbye speech. "And you were more than I could ask for…you still are."
He nodded, he was indeed more. More than she wanted. More than she needed. Shit, more than any beautiful and good girl should be forced to handle. "You know I love you right?" He forced his words to come out almost light, like he was just a guy teasing his friend, not some demon painfully in love with the perfect human girl he was about to destroy.
Kagome felt a tear slide down her cheek as he parked the car, "Inuyasha…please….don't."
She saw him jerk like she had hit him.
"I won't…ever… I swear," he said through clenched teeth. "Let's go."
She followed him inside and to class where he sat and pretended to listen. His body had fallen back into the routine but she could still see that hollow look in his eyes. Miroku and Sango noticed it too. In the hallway they ran into them and had started joking like always, and Inuyasha had just endured it. He didn't act happy or unhappy standing there, just empty.
By lunchtime Kagome's stomach was in so many knots it hurt to move. She sat down at the table with Sango while Miroku and Inuyasha waited in the lunch line.
"What is going on?" she whispered.
Kagome shook her head, "I'm terrified. He is going to do something…he's going to rip me apart…I can feel it. His eyes aren't Inuyasha's anymore…What if he is gone forever?" She choked back a sob, "He gave me some sort of goodbye speech this morning, Sango. What the fuck could that mean?"
Sango stared at Kagome wide eyed. "I…I don't know. Do you think he is planning on leaving town or something?"
After a moment of thought Kagome shook her head, "He wouldn't act like this if he was. He would play normal so I would relax and he could slip away when I wasn't paying attention. This is…intentional."
Inuyasha and Miroku sat down. Miroku gave them both a nod; looking more serious than either one of them had seen him in a long time.
Inuyasha went straight to eating, ignoring the twisting in his stomach. He needed to eat something even if he had to force himself. He knew Kagome was upset and the feeling seemed to be spreading to Sango and Miroku like a disease, but Inuyasha knew that none of them hurt as bad as he did. It wasn't too late to back out of this…
Kikyou walked up and put a hand on his shoulder, "Hi there big guy, how are you?"
Inuyasha looked up at her like there was no one else at the table, "Better now that you're here."
She giggled and leaned down to give him a full kiss on the mouth, he didn't even try to stop her tongue from finding its way between his lips.
"What the fuck do you want?" Sango asked in a growl but she looked more panicked than angry.
"Him," Kikyou said as she slowly pulled away from him and smugly wiped the lipstick off his lips that she had left there.
"Well too fucking bad," Sango growled.
"Is it?" Kikyou asked and tugged on his shirt. Inuyasha stood up.
Miroku blinked, "Inuyasha…"
Inuyasha ignored him and looked at Kagome, "Don't follow me. Please." He turned and walked with Kikyou out of the lunchroom.
Miroku and Sango turned to find Kagome throwing her bag over her shoulder and getting up to leave.
"Don't go Kagome, he isn't even doing this for himself. It's for you. Don't you see that?" Sango asked and grabbed her friend's jacket.
Kagome wiggled free, "Yeah, I see it." She left the lunchroom and moved down the hall fast enough to see Inuyasha and Kikyou slip into one of the bathrooms. She walked the rest of the way without hurrying, attempting to brace herself.
Inuyasha looked up at Kagome as she walked in the restroom.
Kikyou sighed as she glared at the intruder, "I told you she would come; I knew we should have locked the door."
"He wanted me here. Didn't you Inuyasha?" Kagome asked softly and put her bag on the ground.
"Honestly? No. But I figured you would come anyway," he said and tugged Kikyou's shirt over her head.
Kikyou's eyes widened as Kagome sat down on the floor and he undid her bra, "We are going to let her watch?"
Inuyasha gave her a cold smile, "You know you like it. You want her to see it and know that she lost to you. You're probably wet already."
If she hadn't been she damn sure would be now. Kikyou glanced over at Kagome and couldn't help but smile a little. Inuyasha's mouth found one of her nipples and the smile was gone, replaced by desire and smug satisfaction.
Kagome clenched her jaw. He wouldn't force her to watch the whole thing…she just had to outlast him… His hand moved under Kikyou's skirt and she heard the fabric of the girl's panties rip. She felt a fissure begin to crack her heart from bottom to top. His hand didn't come out from under the skirt and Kikyou threw back her head and moaned.
"Another…finger…" Kikyou groaned and then bit her lip as he did as he was told.
Inuyasha hated that he had a hard on. Kagome had killed his instincts last night but they were back with a vengeance now and the demon in him demanded this.
"Kagome, do you by chance have a condom?" Kikyou said huskily.
Inuyasha wanted to smack her but instead he added a third finger and pressed down on her clit roughly with his thumb, "I don't need one."
Kikyou started to laugh but whimpered instead. "I like it…better…without one…anyway…"
He nodded and leaned down and pressed his face into her neck so that he couldn't see Kagome out of the corner of his eyes anymore. He kissed and nibbled her skin and she continued to writhe on the counter in front of him while his hand worked its magic.
Kagome couldn't hold back the tears anymore; she'd be lucky if she could hold back her breakfast. Kikyou's legs suddenly clamped on his hand and her body shivered before relaxing again. He looked at her then and Kagome wanted to scream at him. Instead she watched helplessly as he brought the fingers up to his mouth and licked them. Her stomach heaved but she kept it quiet.
"Aren't going to take off your pants?" she asked through the tears that all three of them could see on her face and hear in her voice.
Inuyasha shook his head, "This is a quickie Kagome, pants stay on, dick goes through the boxers and the zipper. Plus, I've discovered that I like fucking with clothes on, there's just something sexy about a girl with her skirt pushed up over her waist." He pushed Kikyou's skirt high up on her hips and Kagome thanked God that she was observing from the side instead of the front; she really didn't want to ever see Kikyou's vagina.
Kikyou grinned, "You want me to blow you first? You look like you could go twice."
He glanced at Kagome and nodded.
They both watched Kikyou slide off the counter into the floor, wearing nothing but her skirt and her shoes, and start unzipping Inuyasha's pants. His cock came into view and then disappeared again from it when it sank between Kikyou's lips.
Inuyasha didn't try and fight back the moan; his mind may be panicked, his heart may be already completely ripped to shreds, but the rest of his body was damn happy to have the girl on her knees. He sank a hand into her hair and clenched it into a fist, pulling it tight and making her hum happily against his dick. Now he forced his eyes up to meet Kagome's.
Tears were streaming down her cheeks but jaw remained clenched. She kept silent. The only thing that showed how much damage he had already done were her eyes. They had gone almost glassy and had started to look hollow; like she had nothing inside.
Kikyou sucked him harder and he clenched his teeth, "Just get up and leave, Kagome."
She raised her gaze from the level his hips to the level of his eyes and let it rest there.
He squeezed his hands into tighter fists and pulled Kikyou's hair a bit harder; she seemed anything but upset.
"I love you too," Kagome said softly.
Inuyasha stared at her in amazement as she forced pain from her eyes and looked at him like he was the nicest guy in the world. Like he had asked her to marry him on Christmas day and made all of her dreams come true. He felt so…dirty. He had dragged them both into this bathroom and into hell and it seemed like it was all for nothing, because she clearly wasn't leaving.
He couldn't have sex in front of her. The fingering had been hard enough and the blow job had really been pushing it…he couldn't, wouldn't…have sex in front of her. He pulled away from Kikyou and ignored the rush of cold air against his wet skin and the soft 'pop' noise that signaled him sliding out from between her lips. He was such a fucking asshole.
"Get out," he said and gave them both his back so that he could put his dick back in his pants and try get control of the waves of anger and self hatred that were starting to swallow him. "Get the fuck out, both of you!"
"But…" Kikyou said and then squeaked when he slammed his fist into the wall and broke the tile. The school was going to be sending him a bill if they ever found out who was busting up their bathrooms.
He heard shuffling and footsteps, then the door swing open and shut. He hit the wall again and again until his fist was just as busted as the wall and they were both smeared with his blood.
"Stop that," Kagome said as she walked over to him.
He whirled on her, genuinely surprised that she hadn't fled with Kikyou.
She wetted some paper towels at the sink and then walked over and took his hand. He ignored how good the cool paper felt on his busted knuckles and tried to decide what the rest of him was feeling: gratitude, shame, love, hate, so much anger and disgust.
She dabbed the rough paper against his skin and cleaned up all the blood, "I think I have some band aids in my locker."
He slid to his knees on the floor and looked up at her, "What is wrong with you?"
She shook her head like she didn't know either, "I think I care too much."
"Why aren't you yelling, and screaming, and throwing shit, or fucking hitting me?" he whispered.
"There will always be time for that later," she said quietly, feeling completely numb at this point.
He looked up at her and felt a tear slid down his cheek; he was already disgusted with himself, why not add stupid embarrassing tears to the mix? "Why don't you hate me?"
She knelt to the floor and wrapped her arms around him, "I wouldn't have hated you even if you had had sex with the all the girls in the school one by one in front of me. I do love you, I wasn't making that up."
He resisted the urge to pull her closer against him, "This isn't going to go away just because we both want it to."
She nodded, "We will come up with something, think of a solution that your parents haven't tried yet."
He gently cupped the back of her head with his hand and hesitantly pulled her into a hug, "Whatever you say, Kagome." He didn't believe it would work, he didn't believe anything would work.
She closed the distance between them and hugged him more firmly, telling him with her body that she wasn't leaving.
The bathroom door swung open and Kagome was horrified to see the history teacher walk in.
"Won't ever happen again, huh?" he said as he glared at them.