The first rays of dawn seeped through the thin veil curtains already I missed my dark room back in Gotham as my eyes took in the room Jinx and Victor offered me. It wasn't girly but it also wasn't me either I could tell that Jinx had tried her best to make me feel at home. Yet I still felt out of place I was starting to doubt my decision. Maybe coming to New York had been a bad idea after all. I knew what I would be getting myself into when I made my choice of choosing to stand by my friend's side on the most important day of my life. Yet now all I could feel was regret and need to run, run while I still could.
Sitting up I pulled my knees tightly against my chest resting my chin against my sheet encased knees. The various shade of purple and cool gray that filled the room brought me some peace but it did very little to settle my nerves as I remembered what the day still had to offer.
Normally I wasn't one to idle in bed when I knew there was much to do but I just didn't feel the need to get up and start my day not yet. Victor's words from last night kept running through my mind accompanied by the vivid image of seeing another woman draped off Richard's arm. All night I had tossed and turned hour after hour whenever I found myself able to enjoy my sleep my mind conjured up the image of the raven haired male like always I was chasing after him my finger tips brushing the barest of skin. But like every dream I found myself falling into a whirlpool of darkness as he walked off with another. One with whom he could live a normal human life with unlike the life he would ever live if he were to ever realize how deeply my feelings for him truly ran. At my side he'd only find one thing and it was not love but death.
Digging my nails into my flesh I shook my head allowing the pain to bring me back to reality. "Get yourself together Raven you have no time to be thinking of all those what ifs." Closing my eyes, I fell back on the bed tossing my arm over my eyes as once more I reprimanded myself. "It's time to finally turn the page and once and for all close that chapter of your life. Time to grow up and face the reality you stupid girl. Richard and you come from vastly different worlds, worlds that could and should never ever merge. Ever." I felt the tears flowing freely beneath my arm. My voice cracked as I allowed myself to fall apart. "No matter how deep the love you feel for that man the best you could ever do is to keep your distance no matter how much it kills you."
Self loathing one of my inner emotions that I had yet to merge with whispered in the back of my mind along with regret. How can you let go of something that was never yours? Something that you were too frightened to ever give yourself the opportunity to chase after and watch flourish? You are a coward Raven nothing is holding you back not your father not your powers nothing but you. You can no longer use that as an excuse. No the only thing that is stopping you from truly knowing what happiness truly means is you Raven. You are your own curse.
My eyes burned as the tears kept coming of their own accord. Like you said it was never mine. He was never mine I know when to step aside from a pointless war. You didn't even try you ran before the war even started. You gave in on the first battle and again when Kory said his name. You didn't even let her speak you blocked it out. I didn't want to suffer I've suffered enough. Hearing that he's found another would have destroyed me. Understand that. I will never understand that you have always lived in fear of losing control. That fear of destroying the world no longer exists well not to the extent it once did. You can't keep hiding behind that excuse any longer. If you choose to flip the page you will have to learn to live with the consequences because you brought this upon yourself. If no when you lose him, you will only have yourself to blame.
Self loathing left to join the remaining emotions I had yet to merge with. I was still taking baby steps I was still uncertain if I could handle so many emotions on my own. Biting my lower lip, I brushed my arm across my eyes ridding myself of the tear stains. I know that I've already accepted it. Misery is an old friend I don't mind reacquainting myself with him. After all he had been my first true friend. Friendship will always be stronger than love. Pitiful whispered my emotions within my mind that single world echoed my body stiffened as I agreed with them. I really was pitiful.
Throwing the blankets off my body I threw my legs over the side of the bed. "No point in laying here and willowing in my own sorrow Kory needs me today." Gone was my own personal dark clouds replaced with my old clouds the ones I had come to bare with over the course of my life time. "She's always been there for me it's about time I returned the favor and be there on the most important day of her life." A smile tugged at the corner of my lips. "Her wedding day."
Glancing around the room I took in the details Jinx really had put plenty of thought into getting this room ready for my stay. I'd thank her later on as the thought crossed my mind my gaze wondering to the closet that was slightly ajar. For a second I just stared at the white doors but soon enough my curiosity won out. Within seconds I closed the distance between those white doors and me. Reaching out I wrapped my small hands around the silver doorknobs giving it a slow twist of my wrist pulling the doors open. I was surprised to find clothes hanging there. Are these Jinx's? I ran my hand over a dress that caught my attention the second my hands brushed through the hangers a simple teal summer evening dress. Even though it was simple worn by the right women it would really show of their assets without showing too much.
A squeal coming from behind me caused me to flinch almost yanking the dress right off the hanger. Cursing under my breath I steadied my hold on the dress thankful I hadn't caused any damage. Tearing such a beautiful garment would have been a sin. "You will look amazing in the dress dear friend Raven. I spent the months to find the right one." Squealed a feminine voice from behind.
Whirling around a glare already aimed towards the Tamarian princess crossed my features. Glancing one last time at the dress I shook my head crossing my arms with ease across my chest. "You spent months finding a dress for me?" I was touched by her action yes but she really had wasted her time. There was no way I'd ever wear such a dress even though it was gorgeous yes but I'd only succeed in making a fool out of myself if I wore it. "Kory you wasted your time you should have used that time to look after your own wedding and spent more time with your fiancé."
Floating over to where I stood in front of the closet Kory landed her feet touching the carpet with no sound. Like I always remembered a warm welcoming smile painted her lips. "Cyborg told me you'd say that. You no need to worry friend I found the dress while I was doing the last fitting for my dress." She gave me her puppy eyes. How I hated Garfield and Victor now for teaching her that. "Please dear friend Raven wear this today. It is all I ask I won't ask anything more from you but this."
Those words were hollow I knew Kory too well but I couldn't deny her anything at least for today. Come tomorrow I will argue every last word that came from her lips. Nodding my head, I pulled the hanger off the rack without looking. "Fine Kory just because you will only be getting married once I'll war the dress. But if you even so much as bring up the topic of our former leader I will walk. Understood?"
She did very little to hide her disappointment but she agreed. "Yes Raven." Her lips parted to say something else when there was a knock at the door to my temporary room followed by Jinx poking her around the door. "Sorry to interrupt you two but the staff that was hired to get Starfire ready has already arrived and are waiting in the living room."
Kory clapped her hands jumping in place with excitement. Her voice not falling that far behind. "Oh this shall be the fun Beast Boy and Cyborg used to speak of in the old times." Grabbing my hand, she dragged me after her, "Come on dear friend Raven and," as we passed Jinx she grabbed her hand as well dragging both of us off as prisoners. "Jinx we have a wedding to get ready for."
Rolling my eyes, I tilted my head to glance at Jinx whose features could almost mimic my own. At least I wasn't alone in this. Her pink eyes turned to meet my violet eyes as she groaned under her breath. "How I'd rather be at Hive Academy or fighting you guys again over this torture."
A genuine laugh escaped my lips as I nodded in agreement. "Same but as the only people who can put up with her we have to find the strength to stand at her side and make sure she says I do so she can become Parkers problem from then on."
Jinx laughed at my words nudging me with her elbow using her free hand to cover her laughter. "I agree the sooner we get this crazy one married off the sooner we will regain our peace."
My lips formed a thin line as I allowed the Tamarian princess to continue to drag me after her. "Like that will ever happen." I scuffed at the thought. "Not like we even had peace to begin with. We are heroes after all. Peace isn't something we will ever get to learn of until the day we die." I was only speaking the truth after all. Clearing my throat, I forced a smile. "But this is not the day to speak of such morbid things. We have a wedding to get ready for and bride who needs some serious help."
I was only joking of course anyone who had ever set their eyes on Kory and saw her as nothing but beautiful was clearly blind or needed to get their eyesight checked. Every male we had ever encountered had fallen for her including Richard. Biting my lip, I forced back the tears and emotions that threated to take over.
I was more than thankful the second that one of the makeup girls took my hand from Kory's grasp and sat me down in one the seats that they had arranged in the living room. Tapping her lower lip, she turned to look at the blonde that was already at work with putting some type of cream on Kory's skin. "Julian I'm not certain what to do with this one." She reached out pulling at a strand of my hair then letting it go before wiping her hand off on her jeans as if she was disgusted. "She's so dull."
My eyes narrowed at the brunette before me. "Do you wish to die?" My voice lowered a few notes. Okay so I didn't even find myself attractive but for her too put in the form she did just hit a nerve with me.
The blonde Julian paused in his movement tilting his head to give me a quick glance before turning his attention back to Kory. "Leslie she isn't dull at all stop being a jealous little bitch and get to work." Finishing up with applying the cream to Kory's skin he turned back biting his nail. "Better yet switch with May you can work on the pink haired one."
Leslie held her head up high sneering at me before storming off to switch with the one Julian had called May. This one was a strawberry blonde who clearly was the chipper talkative type. Without much warning she reached out bunching my hair together piling my locks into a bun above my head before getting to work but never stopping her yapping. Her hands moved so quickly with various different makeup tools that I wanted to run. "Subtle tones will suit you best and a simple up do with curls falling loosely over your almost bare shoulders with that teal dress will leave every man with their jaws hanging."
"I'm not the one getting married so keep the jaw hanging to the minimum if you could." I clenched my jaw starting to get irritated with this whole thing.
Like always Kory piped in with her own input. "No Peter and I are getting married but I'd love to see you Robin finally admit what you feel for each other."
Closing my eyes, I held back my tongue I so badly wanted to bark back. Mind your business and stay out of my life. But I didn't I bite my tongue knowing very well that all that she wanted to do was see Richard and I happy even if it wasn't with each other.
Julian must have sensed the tension that was eating away at what should be a wonderful day. Pulling Kory from her seat he clapped his hands together, "Okay you are done my little butterfly." With a shooing motion he ordered her. "Now go get changed into that dress of yours so I can work my magic on that gorgeous red hair of yours."
Kory squealed running off to get changed. Sometimes I wondered if she really was an adult or still a child. Julian made his way over to me studying the work May had done. "Not bad darling though I would have used a bolder shadow for her."
May made a face at him. "She's not a hooker Julian soft tones suit her better. Plus, she has a cat to fight off the bird that is rightfully hers." She countered back placing a hand on her hip while she waved a brush in her other hand. "He will fall to his knees the second he sets his eyes on her."
Rolling my eyes at the two of them I turned just as Kory reentered the living room. My mouth was slightly a jaw as I saw her in her wedding dress for the first time. She really was stunning. The gown suited her well it was traditional yet still it didn't hide who she was. I couldn't help but laugh at the fact that she had even included a crown as part of her train. She really would always be a princess no matter what.
Gathering my thoughts, I smiled up at my friend. "You really do look gorgeous Kory. We'll have to have a doctor on call because Parker is going to faint the second he sees you walking down that alter." It was a joke but partially true he may actually faint at the sight of his wife to be.
Kory attempted to swing her arms around me but Julian intercepted her sitting her back down in the chair he had previously had her seated. "Ah ah ah no no my little princess." He waved his finger in front of her. "I still have much work to do." Kory pouted not happy at being stopped from hugging me.
Standing up I walked over nudging her arm with my own. "I will get dressed and head over to the church I'll meet you there."
With a frown she looked up at me. "But we are supposed to arrive together."
"Shaking my head at how childish she was acting I reached out grabbing her hand and giving it a squeeze. "I will meet you right outside the church just as you are arriving I promise."
This seemed to help appease her disappointment as she nodded. "Okay take care dear friend Raven."
Nodding my head, I turned heading off to my temporary room to change into the dress Kory had picked out for me. For a moment I just stared at it as it laid across the bed. There was no turning back now nut unless I was willing to hurt Kory. With a strained smile I shed my clothing before slipping into the dress. Sitting on the edge of the bed I slipped into a pair of silver heals. God would my feet hurt after this but it was only for one day I could bare with it.
Assuring that the clasp around my ankle was secure I stood up almost tumbling forward before as I wasn't accustomed to wearing these death traps. Levitating I flew out through the window heading for the church the curls that May had done with my hair swirling in the wind. I hadn't even looked in the mirror before leaving. I just hoped that I didn't look like a fool. It was too late to turn back now.
How Raven looks:
Dress 3
Hair bottom right corner.
Make up
Sorry for taking so long to update life's been a bit chaotic for me lately. I hope you guys like it. Sorry for now RobRae yet but I promise you guys some in the next chapter.