AN: Edited April 5, 2016

Day 251

Hermione had never been so happy to leave a place before. The staff at St. Mungo's were accommodating and kind, but the down time was boring and numbed her mind. They were the exact opposite of Azakban, where human company was few and far between. She started to feel smothered in the pillows and constant check-ups. Harry and Ginny brought her a few various books to read but it didn't do her any good. She'd been locked away for months on end. All she really wanted to do was get up and move.

She was skittish, she knew she was. Walking out of her room at St. Mungo's to the floo system felt like a muggy dream, one laced with pain killers and sleep draught. She didn't quite feel alive as she traveled the short distance to the floo system and headed to her new place of residence. After having been gone for six months her parents' home was evicted, and they were still far away in sunny Australia. She had no place to go.

Harry and Ginny graciously offered up the extra room in their flat for her to stay until she got back on her feet. She would have to find a sound job and work for some time before she could move out, but anything was better than the bleak hospital room, even if she felt that her friends were coddling her.

"Do you need anything else Hermione?"

She shook her head, remaining in the same spot on the sofa. More than anything else she desired to go outside and see the sun. Her eyes still hurt sometimes, but nothing could heal her more than the touch of pure light hitting her skin, a gentle breeze not carrying the smell of stench and death. Harry and Ginny lived in a private enough area, but she felt drowsy and exhausted from her short travel back to their place. She really hadn't done much moving in a long time.

Still, what she wouldn't give to take a blinding run outside.

"I'm fine Ginny. You don't need to watch me every moment. Why don't you go do some of your work? I heard you telling Harry you're dreadfully far behind before he left. Go on, I'm fine."

Despite how distant her friends had been since her return, Ginny had begun to warm up to her the most. Hermione had hoped Harry and Ron would be more understanding and inviting, but overtime she realized they were still waking up from a nightmare. Hermione Granger had been dead for six months in their world. They needed time to adjust. She just didn't know why they couldn't act happier. It was starting to feel like she was a bad omen, something brought back from the dead that should've stayed lost.

"Are you sure?" the ginger asked, peering at her friend. "I don't have to right now. Come now, you just got out of St. Mungo's! We should be celebrating or something!"

"We didn't celebrate last night when I got out. We came back to your apartment, you showed me to my room, and they we went our separate ways."

Ginny worried her lip, watching her friends bleak expression never once change. "Harry's still trying to adjust, and you were nearly asleep when we flooed here. We can't exhaust you."

"I've been out of Azkaban for more than two weeks," she sighed. "I know Harry and Ron are stunned, but they are supposed to be my dearest friends! They could at least act happy that I'm back!"

"They are happy," Ginny stressed. "But they've been under a lot of stress since the war ended. Oh Hermione, you just missed so much. There's still so much to tell you, to show you since Voldemort was defeated. They're trying to figure out how to break the news about everything."

She tilted her head at that, brunette locks falling over her shoulder as she leaned closer. "What news do they have to break?"

"Well… for example, we thought you were dead."

"Yes, so? I'm not. We've already covered that."

"Right, but Hermione that doesn't mean that everyone else is still alive. We gave you some names, some of the people who passed. But some… some are easier to discuss than others."

She stilled at that, having not thought about that realm of possibility. She was initially just so happy to be free of the prison that she hadn't considered who wouldn't be around when she came back, who was still left to tell her about.

"Who died Ginny?"

Slowly the ginger shook her head, sad brown eyes looking downward. "Harry and Ron wanted to be the ones to tell you everything. They've been trying to come up with an easy way to explain without breaking down."

"There will be no easy way to say it," she snapped, hazel eyes looking down. "People died. That shouldn't be such a shock to me. It happens in war. I just forgot to wonder who else was still… here."

Ginny leaned forward, hesitantly placing a hand over Hermione's. Physical contact had been a scarce thing since she returned, and she almost withdrew at the notion. It was a foreign feeling.

"You've had other things to worry about," she replied kindly, giving Hermione's hand a squeeze. This was the kindest she had seen the ginger since waking up at St. Mungo's. "You were out of the loop, trapped someplace inhumane. You had to learn how to readjust to comfort and actual human interaction first. Plus with your endless nightmares and the uncertainty of how things were, you had a lot on your plate to handle. You needed to worry about yourself first Hermione, and you have. Don't feel bad that you didn't ask right away. There's time for these things."

Listening to her friend Hermione got the feeling that she was very sad, and she feared to ask why. Before she could the kettle in the kitchen began to whistle.

"I asked you earlier, but you never answered my question about tea. I can't tell you everything right now Hermione, it's way too much. But there is something that I would really like to talk about with you, something I know Ron won't be brave enough to discuss. Would you care to listen?"

"What about Ron?" she asked, a sense of foreboding setting in. The topic of her boyfriend – perhaps ex-boyfriend now, they hadn't quite discussed their standing – was something that no one seemed eager to discuss, even the boy in question.

She tried to smile, but it came out more of a grimace than anything. "Let me get the tea- it'll only take a moment. Then we'll talk."

Ginny got up and disappeared towards the kitchen leaving her friend alone on the couch. Hermione had learned during her time in Azkaban to both value and hate the idea of solitude. It could do the mind good in small quantities to be left alone, but to be left alone too long was a truly scary concept.

She glanced towards the window, curtains hiding the sunlight she so very much desired. Her eyes were adjusted to the light now, and bright images didn't cause her to flinch so much. But she hadn't seen a lot of sunlight in her time since returning to the real world. It was a tantalizing subject, something constantly just out of reach.

Standing she headed to the window and withdrew the curtains, peering out into the bright light. Outside there was green grass and clear skies, things she hadn't seen in ages.

"Hermione! Where are you going?"

She couldn't quite help herself as she darted out the door, racing down the steps of the apartments to reach the outdoors. Trailing close behind her she could hear Ginny following her every step, but she didn't care. She knew exactly what she wanted.

Her breath hitched as she ran, the overexertion of her limps hitting her full force as she dashed outside. She wanted nothing more than to collapse headfirst against the ground, but a deeper desire to feel clean wind smacking her face outweighed her exhaustion. Bare feet danced off the hot concrete for only a moment before she hit dirt and grass, pausing at the nearest tree to pant. It wasn't a far run, but it did take the air completely out of her.

"Going for a run Granger?"

She almost jumped out of her skin at the voice. Ginny stopped beside her as well, sending the blond an uncertain look.

"Malfoy?" she asked, stepping closer to her friend, but Hermione shrugged her friend away.

He was standing on the nearby pavement, apparently having just exited the café near the apartments. The street might not be overly busy, but this was still London and there were people everywhere.

"Hello Granger," he said, heading over to the tree. He sent her a half smile, something she suspected was more for courtesy than anything else. To Ginny he merely nodded. "I see you've gotten out of St. Mungo's."

"I was released yesterday," she said breathlessly, one hand over her heart.

He nodded. "Good for you then. I suppose you haven't been outside much by the way you ran happily out here?"

It wasn't like he would know or anything. She hadn't seen him in eleven days. Hermione had been hoping to talk to him about numerous things but she hadn't gotten the chance to. Now that she was out of the hospital though she could attempt to, if he bothered to see her anymore. Maybe he was avoiding her for a reason.

"Yes, she hasn't really gotten out much," Ginny cut in, smiling half-heartedly at the blond. No matter what he did for her friend she still had her doubts about the blond. "I was half expecting her to do this earlier."

Draco nodded, hardly paying the ginger woman any mind. "Are you staying with Potter and Weasley?"

"Yes," Hermione replied, surprised he didn't come up with some sort of insulting names for her friends. "I don't have a place of my own right now and they offered. Hopefully in a few months I'll have a good enough job to move out though. I don't want to be a burden."

"You're not a burden Hermione," Ginny said seriously, shooting her friend a glare. "Don't think for a moment that you are. You are welcome in our home for however long you need."

Nodding quickly to her friend, she returned her attention to Draco. Considering he was the only person she hadn't seen a switch of moods in she wanted to speak to him the most.

"Do you think we could have lunch together soon?"

His eyebrows shot up and Ginny practically fell over. It took the both of them a few seconds to recover, and it took even longer for the blond to respond. "You want to have lunch?"

"Yes."

"With me?"

"Yes - as a thank you of course. If you hadn't campaigned for me I would still be rotting away in a dingy cell." Ginny cringed at her friends remark but chose to stay quiet on the subject, suddenly very interested in her shoes.

Draco studied her a moment longer before responding. "When would you want to have lunch?"

"Soon- um, anytime soon. Tomorrow maybe? I have to go job hunting in the morning but maybe something in the late afternoon around two or three?"

"Two would be fine," he replied, eyes still watching her warily. "We can try this café if you like, or if you need to be off at Diagon Alley there are plenty of places there."

"Here's fine," she said airily, glancing at the café. "I've never been there before and it will be good for me to come back by then. I'm still building up my endurance again. I'm not even supposed to apply for jobs for another two weeks."

Draco arched an eyebrow, shooting a glance towards Ginny. The ginger was still gaping at her friend, trying to decide what part of her sentence she should pick apart first. Apparently it was news to her that Hermione wanted to go job hunting.

"I'll see you tomorrow at two then," he said, finding a way out of the conversation quickly. "And Granger? Don't overwork yourself if you're still supposed to be resting."

"I'll try."

They watched the blond turn and leave. He was barely off the grass before he disappeared, apparating with a pop. Seconds later Ginny was on her case.

"There's no way you're applying for jobs tomorrow Hermione!" she snapped, shaking her head at the brunette. "You're strictly supposed to stay home for two more weeks. The heavy amounts of sleep draught the Healers have you on to help with nightmares are dangerous and you can't just go wandering around alone. You're not supposed to be doing things like this until after they start weaning you off the potions. It's to help you heal, not hinder you."

"Ginny, I survived alone in a dirty cell for months with little food, light, or water to help keep me alive, and for a stretch of time Malfoy. Sometimes I was a bit delirious, especially after my only company left. I can handle some heavy potions."

Ginny sighed, letting the topic go. She knew she wouldn't get through to her friend this way, but tonight Harry would be home and they could both talk to her about it then. Unfortunately they would both be away at work tomorrow unless Ginny took time off work to watch her friend. She was starting to worry that she would have to, if only to make sure Hermione kept taking things slow.

Extending an arm to her worn-out friend Ginny tried smiling. "Come on then, if you have a date for tomorrow then you better rest up. We can talk outside here if you want to stay in the sun, but your body should keep resting. There's plenty of grass to sit on."

"I don't have a date," Hermione declared, following her ginger friend across the grass to a shadier patch of trees. "I just need to speak with Malfoy."

They sat down, and Ginny looked at her seriously. "Is this about your time in Azkaban?"

"So what if it is?

Sighing, Ginny looked off across the grass, her brows drawn together, "Hermione you know you can talk to any of us about your time you know. It's hard for us to understand but we can try. We're all here for you."

"No Gin, unfortunately you don't understand," she snapped, momentarily losing her cool. "I wouldn't want you to understand. Azkaban is a soulless place that eats up your hope in most anything. Malfoy understands that. He spent quite a bit of time there with me."

"So you need someone who you can confide in who can understand? That's why you're so stuck on getting Malfoy to talk to you?"

"Yes."

In truth that wasn't the reason at all. She wasn't sure she'd ever be ready to talk about those lonely days after Draco left with anyone. It was a private, terrifying matter she didn't know how to put into words.

She had many other things to discuss with Draco than her pitiful stories about Azkaban. And she intended to get some answers from him tomorrow.

Day 252

After promising Harry and Ginny that she wouldn't go out and look for jobs, Hermione snuck out that morning and did exactly that. She couldn't live with the feeling of being helpless and reliant on other people anymore. She had to do this for herself.

The discussion she had with Ginny yesterday still lingered in her mind. It wasn't the deep talk she had been expecting. On the contrary it was on a topic she hadn't even really thought about, not until people started bringing it up.

Ron.

She had gotten with Ron before her disappearance, and now she learned that he was not only with Lavender Brown, but he was engaged to the twit. It was startling to realize that Ron got engaged - to a brainless bimbo no less - before Harry and Ginny tied the knot. Maybe that was what she was having the hardest time understanding.

He didn't wait for her. A part of her mind told her she should be upset that it took less than six months for him to not only hook up with his previous girlfriend but propose to her. Yet after everything, she couldn't will herself to be angry about it. It just didn't seem important anymore.

Ginny expected her to be heartbroken and dissolve into tears yet Hermione did nothing of the sort. She knew what her disappearance looked like to the outside world, even while she was sitting in Azkaban. Ron might have mourned her for a time, but he was a human and couldn't hold onto someone dead forever.

The other part of her was ecstatic that he found someone to make him happy. This meant that there would never be any conflicting emotions between Ron and Hermione, and she could live in peace with that. She was even more certain of the fact because Ron proposed after she was saved and he still hadn't changed his mind. Still, she should at least feel hurt that he let her go so quickly. Even now, she was questioning her own feelings. Before she was kidnapped she thought they had something really special, but maybe she had been wrong. It hadn't taken him too long apparently after the conclusion of the war to get with Lavender.

Hermione had concluded that this was why Lavender was so cold when she first spoke to her two weeks before. The woman surely had some doubts about Ron when she resurfaced. But there was nothing left between Hermione and Ron.

That was okay because Hermione couldn't do love right now. She had too many other things to handle. She wasn't even sure she could love someone anymore. Her insides felt too icy to hold that emotion inside.

Clearing her mind, she set about the task at hand. Looking for a job proved to be very difficult. Wandering around she drew a lot of attention and people wanted to stop her and ask her about everything. After two hours she had yet to really go in any store and try to apply. She kept getting swarmed by people.

"Hermione Granger," one particularly pushy bloke called. The man had followed her for the past half an hour with his reporter friend and the two had yet to give up trying to get an interview with her.

"I told you I'm not answering questions," she snapped, rounding a corner. It wasn't until then that she realized how close they were, the two somewhat boxing her in.

"It won't take long," reporter one said, blocking out other approaching figures from the right. "Come now, just a few questions."

That's when the claustrophobia set in. She didn't like being pressed into spaces, not after so much time in the dingy little cell. She didn't even like to go to the kitchen in Harry and Ginny's apartment, because the space was too crowded. And this fellow was beginning to press her back into the wall, cutting off her escape route, the stupid quill and parchment daring to reach close to her chest as he bombarded her with unanswered questions.

"Get away from me," she hissed, stepping back further against the wall. People were starting to crowd around, pushing her closer and closer to the wall. She felt like she couldn't breathe, the people slowly cutting out the view of the street in front of her,

A cell. It's like being limited in a cell in Azkaban.

"Miss Hermione…"

"Miss Granger reportedly…"

She wasn't really listening to the voices anymore. Her eyes darted back and forth, looking for an escape route, a way to scurry between two people or slink down an alleyway where she could apparate out of here. Screw it if it drained her energy. She'd be out of here. But her hands were shaking now, clenched as tightly into fists as her muscles could allow. She wasn't sure she could manage the complex magic of apparition.

"Miss Granger-"

"Okay, okay, bugger off," came a voice, one that had now surprised her twice in two days. "She obviously doesn't want to talk to you."

"Malfoy?" she asked, surprised as the blond pushed through the crowd. He was taller than most of the crowd, who surged forward with renewed interest as he grabbed her arm, much gentler than she imagined he would, and began to pull her out of the throng of people. She shrank in closer to him as people swarmed the empty space behind them, their voices growing higher and shriller and their interest peaked.

"Shh," he said, eyeing the people still following them, eyes barely darting over her head for a moment. "Not now Granger. Will you mind apparating?"

"No, no of course not." It was a lie, she wasn't sure she could get there in one piece. But having someone there with her, someone now chasing her around for answers and pushing her back into walls, she felt a little better. If he felt her shaking he didn't let on.

"Then try to stop shaking," he hissed, immediately dashing her hopes. Her hands clenched up again, trying to keep the tremor of he shoulders at bay. He was almost dragging her along now, holding tighter to her arm as he quickened the pace. "We'll go to that little café by Potter's okay? Go first and I'll follow."

She felt a bit uneasy at that. At least if she collapsed from her trip she'd have a moment of two to compose herself on the ground before he arrived. A few seconds later she disappeared with a pop, her arm free from Draco. She arrived next to the café, Malfoy arriving a few seconds later.

She stumbled from the effort, using her hands to catch herself against the dirt. He offered her his hand but she ignored it, quickly brushing herself off, attempting to keep her shakes at bay. They weren't as bad now, but with her energy drained she wasn't sure she could keep her legs from buckling under her. A light sheen of sweat rested across her brow. Crossing her arms tightly as she tried to look in control, and less like she wanted nothing more than to pass out. "I could've done that. Apparating out by myself and all." Even to herself, it sounded like a lie with the way her voice shook.

"Then why didn't you?" He scoffed, shoving his hands down into his pockets as he glared at her, eyes sweeping over her shaken form. "I could see you panicking from a mile away Granger. You weren't going to come up with that simple solution."

Slightly offended she turned her nose up and away from the blond. "I was not panicking. And besides Malfoy, I'm supposed to be resting as it is. I wasn't even sure I could manage apparition."

He chuckled lowly, leaning back against the light post. "There's no reason to lie Granger. I've been there myself, panicking from the littlest things. Azkaban is more than a physical prison to its prisoners- it's a mental one too." Letting his eyes move away from her, he continued, "I'm surprised you didn't pass out. But I figured if I did side-along apparition it'd only give the reporters more to gossip about."

Dropping her arms, she looked back at him, her shoulders sagging a little. Knowing that he has been to Azkaban and had experienced what she did, she believed his words. "Did you ever get so panicky that you couldn't think?" she whispered, clenching and unclenching her hands.

"No, not really. I've never had anything that dramatic happen, and after being out for a few months the feelings gone away. But I was never alone in Azkaban either. You were there before me, and you stayed long after me."

"Don't remind me," Hermione grumbled.

He shrugged, looking her over. "I think to be precautious you should head the Healer's words and wait a few weeks before going to busy, crowded places like Diagon Alley. It won't do any good if you're there panicking."

"I couldn't help it," she sighed, looking off towards the patch of trees she sat under with Ginny yesterday. "They were… too close."

"Claustrophobic feelings?"

"Yeah."

"Did you ever have them before?" he inquired, eyes glancing at her trembling hands again.

"No, my only real fear before being locked up with flying," she said, letting a hollow laugh escape. She shook out her arms, hoping the shakes would go away so he'd stop looking at her like that. "Now that I've been locked away in a dirty, little room I find that I don't like to be concealed in small places. It brings back the memories of being trapped there."

"It's natural to feel that way after spending a lot of time there," he said, causing her to feel a little better. He wouldn't meet her eyes, but somehow she felt his words were sincere. "You've been locked away for ages; you finally have space and you refuse to give it up. It's understandable. I was the same way, but only for about a week. The feeling is gone now. It just goes away the more you go outside and interact. You have to get back into the swing of things."

"And here you are telling me to not go out to crowded places for a few weeks."

"It is a good idea. You don't need to push yourself into anything. You have plenty of time to just sit back and heal properly. You don't want the aftermath effects to become long lasting."

Her eyes dropped to the ground at that. "I suppose. Well, I should thank you then for getting me out of there, even if I could've done it myself. I'm sure I can handle myself the next time."

"Hopefully next time will be in a few weeks and you won't be half as paranoid," he replied sternly, reminding Hermione of the tone of voice Harry used last night when lecturing her about pushing herself. "And you don't need to thank me Granger. I'm sure the reporters who were following you around will have a nice, gossipy article all about it for the evening paper."

Hermione's cheeks paled at that. "I forgot that bit."

"You're friends are going to find out you were out here pushing yourself whether you like it or not. I'm afraid there isn't much I can do about that."

Nodding, something occurred to her. "Yeah, I'm sure that's all they will focus on, never mind the fact that you're the one that got me out of there." She paused then, something else occurring to her. "It's strange that you just happened to be in the right place at the right time, isn't it?"

Chuckling, the blond looked her over. "No, not really. I remembered your determination from yesterday to go and visit Diagon Alley and apply for jobs. I just decided to go strolling during a time when I was sure you'd be out, and apparently it's a good thing I did too."

"You were checking up on me?" she asked, interest peaking as he shared that bit of information with her. She thought he'd been avoiding her for days, yet here he was admitting that he came to check in on her.

"Granger, I have been there. When I got out I was determined to make sure you escaped too. I plunged into the task, trying everything I could to convince the courts that you were there. I did it right away before my body and mind were prepared and it was very difficult. Being cautious and taking things slow isn't a bad idea. But I knew you wouldn't wait around and just figured you'd have the same paranoid reactions I did, only tenfold."

He had several good points there. Clamping her lips together, she studied the blond. She didn't quite know what to say now.

"We should get something to eat," he commented. "It's only a quarter past noon, but you need some food and something warm to drink. It'll get you to stop shaking."

Surprised, she glanced down. Her hands still trembled a bit despite the fact that the entire experience was over. She tightly clamped them together, hoping it would soon stop. Why couldn't she just calm down?

"I agree."

Following Draco into the café she found her mind wandering. Despite everything else she wanted to discuss, talking about post - Azkaban reactions was probably a very good idea. He might even be able to help her cope with everything, more so than her friends could.

Investing time in Malfoy would be a good idea. Now she only hoped he wouldn't mind all of the extra company.

A/n: And here's chapter 3! I hope you like it :D There's more to come soon!

Also, big thanks to all the awesome reviewers! You guys just rock.