Disclaimer: Nothing recognizable is mine. A lot of the dialogue is direct from the show. No copyright infringement intended.
A/N: Thank you all for the incredible reviews! They are such great motivation, but not only that, they just really make my day. I know you're all really anxious for the "Derek-is-my-husband" reveal but unfortunately you have to wait a little longer (but I promise you the wait is worth it, that part of the story might be my favorite writing I've ever done for a fanfic). Without further ado, here's the next part of Fools Like Me.
Apparently everyone is having a rough day. Izzie practically drags me into her patient's room rambling on about how he's crashing but she can't do anything. We aren't supposed to make the call whether or not a brain dead patient lives or dies but Izzie has a point. Izzie has a point and I have a point to prove. I need to be my own doctor. In that moment I decide that we're going to give this man the last twenty-seven minutes that we owe him. I move to get the dopamine, we're going to give this brain dead man a blood transfusion.
After the blood transfusion, Izzie and I slid to the ground, leaning against the wall in relief. He's stable and we've given him the time he still deserves. We're laughing together in relief when we get a page from Cristina to meet her in the stairwell, as she's on the move. Our relief is short lived when she tells us that the patient has a traumatic aortic injury. In only a few short moments it seems I've fallen down the rabbit hole. I just wanted to give the man a few more minutes but now Izzie is going on about surgeries and keeping him alive.
As Izzie goes to resume searching for his family, Cristina turns to me and says, "She's vice-president of fantasyland." And I have to agree, Izzie is convinced we can keep this man alive, despite that fact that he is brain dead.
Unfortunately, to get the surgery we need to go above Bailey's head, which is how I find myself opening the men's bathroom door to try to talk to Burke. When he realizes I'm trying to talk to him, I slip out of the room again, embarrassed. I can't believe I'm doing this.
"What the hell Meredith," Cristina asks when I shut the door.
"He's using the urinal Cristina," I reply, "I can't talk to him as he pees."
Cristina rolls her eyes at me, "Oh, you big baby." She pushes me to the side and takes my position at the door, opening it again to talk to Burke. When Burke asks a question that Cristina isn't sure how to answer, she closes the door again. We have a short whispered fight before we swing the door open and both stumble in a little. I tell Burke that we treated the patient on my orders. Anything that happens from this point out is now considered my fault. Just this morning I was saying how I wanted to make a name for myself but now I'm really regretting that. This is insane, honestly.
Burke looks at us like we're insane before smiling a little and asking, "You do enjoy crossing the line, don't you?"
Then, with some crude terms, Burke kicks us out of the bathroom.
With Burke not willing to help us, there's only one other attending we're comfortable to approach. I find Derek walking down the hall, his nose buried in a chart. Sliding up to him, as nonchalantly as possible, I smile a little.
He looks up from his chart and his eyes start to twinkle when he realizes that I'm the person who approached him, "Hey," He says.
I know that he's going to be insufferable after this, seeing as just this morning I was so adamant about not living under his shadow, "The brain dead patient?," I decide to just dive into my question instead of giving him an opening to make fun of the situation, "We want to perform surgery but Burke won't help us. What should we do?"
"Oh," Derek smirks as he realizes what I'm saying, "You're asking for my advice? I thought you wanted to be your own doctor."
"Now's not the time," I hiss, glancing out of the corner of my eye towards where Cristina and Izzie are watching. "This is important," I add, hoping he'll take it seriously.
Derek nods, "Okay. You want to get around Burke? You gotta find a way to get the Chief involved."
"Thanks," I say, smiling a little, "If we weren't in the hospital right now, I'd kiss you," I shrug and start to walk away, "I guess I'll just have to make it up to you at home." His hands are on his hips and he's shaking his head, amused at me. Before leaving, I flash him a quick wink over my shoulder and I hear a slight chuckle in response.
It dawns on me moments later on how to get the Chief, not only involved, but to support our surgery. Looking like a girl gang in scrubs, Izzie, Cristina, and I, corner George. If our guy is a match with George's guy, the Chief's VIP patient, then we are almost guaranteed the Chief to back the heart surgery. In an instant, all of the color drains from George's face when we ask him to go over Burke's head and straight to the Chief.
Alex Karev might just be the most despicable person I have ever met. My day started with him ruining it and right now, with him rubbing in the fact that he performed John Doe's surgery, it is ending with him ruining it. All I want to do is go home and sleep. It's been a long and exhausting day filled with idiot bikers and asshole attendings, as well as an annoying husband. On top of that, when I finally came to change I had two missed calls from my mother's nursing home, plus a voicemail. Today she was, in true Ellis fashion, being a pain in everyone's ass.
The last thing I need is Karev to be rubbing himself all over me, bragging about how good he supposedly smells. Him nuzzling my hair is the final straw and I grab him by his scrub top, slamming him against a locker.
"You have gotta be kidding me," I yell at him, "Okay. I have more important things to deal with than you. I have roommates, and husband problems, and family problems," He yawns as I scream at him and I'm tempted to break his nose, "You want to act like a little frat boy bitch, that's fine. You want to take credit for your saves, and everybody else's? That's fine too. Just stay out of my face. And for the record," He isn't looking at me and I'm so angry that I won't allow that. I grab his face, squeezing it hard and forcing him to meet my eyes, "You smell like crap."
Letting go of his face, I turn to see Derek standing in the doorway, looking confused and worried. I ignore him and walk to my locker, rubbing the bridge of my nose. The headache that I can feel growing is going to be terrible by the time I get home.
"She attacked me," Alex says. I spin around to see Derek further into the room and Alex pointing at me. Without thinking I storm towards Alex. I'll show him what being attacked really is. I'm almost on him when Derek grabs me, saying my name multiple times as he tries to calm me down. I struggle against Derek's grip for a second before I let him lead me backwards, his hands on my upper arms, keeping me restrained. Once I drop my fists Derek turns around to address Karev.
"You know what," He warns, "You might want to leave. Before I change my mind and let her beat you to a pulp with her tiny ineffectual fists." He leads Alex out of the room as I stay by my locker, breathing heavily from the anger coursing through my bloodstream. Right before Derek slams the door in Alex's face, the asshole intern mimes emotional crying. I am so going to kill that douchebag one day. As if nothing happened, I start pulling out my bag and other things from my locker so that I can actually go home.
Derek turns to me and sighs. I look at him and our eyes meet. Usually, we can hold pretty intense conversations through eye contact but right now, I'm not entirely sure what he is trying to say. That's probably because I don't know what I'm trying to say either.
"What?" He asks me.
"Nothing," I say before turning away and grabbing my coat, "It's just," I don't even know what it is. Derek nods for me to continue but I'm not sure what I want to say so I just tell him, "Nothing." I quickly shut my locker and move toward the door. Derek moves to stop me, blocking my way out and grabbing my upper arms in the same way as before, only this time to comfort and not restrain.
"Do you want to talk?" He asks me.
I shake my head before burying myself in his arms. Derek sighs and tightens his grip on me. He leans against the door, essentially locking us in the room. We stay there for a few minutes, neither of us speaking. The only sound in the locker room is the soft huffs of our breath. I start to calm down and settle in his embrace. Closing my eyes as a breathe him in I decide that, at the very least, we can't hide our marriage at home. I need him. I can't hide it forever.
Despite my decision before leaving the hospital, when Derek and I walk into the house, I shove him upstairs as quickly as possible so that George and Izzie don't see him. I'm going to tell them who my husband is, and soon, but I can't let them find out from the two of us walking inside. I tell Derek that I'll meet him upstairs before I walk into the living room to see what Izzie and George are going through.
"Are those my mother's surgical tapes?" I'm positive that they are, but as I'm so shocked to see them I ask anyways.
Izzie tells me that she likes to nest. The thing is, I'm not a nesting person. I don't nest. As they keep going through the tapes, I grab the pictures that Izzie set up around the room, to put them back into storage.
Slamming the pictures back into a box I declare, "No. No. We're not watching my mother's surgery tapes, we're not unpacking boxes, and we're not having long conversations where we celebrate the moments of our lives. And use a coaster!"
As I storm out of the room George tells me that he ordered Chinese. Practically spitting fire, I scream, "I hate Chinese Food," and I march upstairs.
Opening the door to my bedroom, I find Derek relaxing on the bed, smirking a little. He clearly heard my rant. I warn him not to say anything. Instead, he pats the bed next to him and reminds me that I promised to thank him for his help with the John Doe. Relieved to just be with my husband and nobody else, I move to the bed to join him. We start just kissing slowly but soon he's pulling my sweater over my head and I'm laughing as he pushes me into the mattress.