Three Days Later
The people that know about me and Nessie always question. Why I don't just tell her how I feel? And believe me I asked myself that question a million times. Maybe even a billion times. And my response is always that my timing is just not right. And even though at moments it's completely true. I don't know. I just don't know. I feel like I'm back in high school. Crushing on the most popular girl in school and when I'm alone with her. I just get nervous. Every time she smiles at me and every time when she look at me. I just get this feeling and I don't how to explain it.
I've always been her best friend. I watched her being born, I watched her grow up. I guess that even though I finally have feelings for her and I'm finally there and I'm there physically. Maybe I'm just not fully there mentally. And maybe the only reason I want to be with her is because I imprinted on her.
That's where I think my resistance is. I keep thinking about the only reason she is alive. Is because I imprinted on her because when I thought Bella was dead. I was going to kill her. And again there's my resistance because I have this past that she knows nothing about and the thing with Bella. Her mom!
I think that's the main reason why I've been so hesitaten to tell her because when I tell her. I have to tell her about Bella and once I do, knowing her. She'll never want to see me again. And I couldn't be able to live if she wasn't in my life. Before I can tell her that I have feelings for her. I have to tell her about me and her mom. I just have too.
I went to Jeremy's house because i had to tell her about me and Bella. That way she can't really be mad because we're not together. But my now problem was how was I suppose to bring it up in a way where I tell her like I wasn't trying to keep it a secret.
"What's up Jeremy" I greeted as I entered his house. He had a couple of friends over and they were sitting in the living room. Playing a video game.
"Hey man" he greeted back. His eyes glued to T.V and side talking with his friends.
"If your looking for Carlie, you just missed her. She left like 10 minutes ago" he said. Another reason why I haven't told her because sometimes I don't know where she is.
"You wouldn't happen to know, where she was going?" I asked.
"Yeah, she said she heading over to Samuel's" he answered.
"Of course" I sighed.
I phased to beat Nessie to Sam's. I was in the back of the house within minutes but when I got there. She was already there. From behind the trees. I saw them in his house. Not very well. But I could hear them perfectly. And I got there I guess right on time for once.
"Hey, did you do what I said?" Samuel asked.
"I don't like Seth in that particular way!" Nessie answered.
"I was talking about Jacob" Samuel said. I hear no reply from Nessie and I could no longer see her because she moved away from the window.
"Ness, just tell him how you feel. Again" Samuel said.
"No. I spent a lot of time thinking. It took my dad like a century to find my mom. Considering how happy they are. She was the one he needed to be with. She was worth the wait"
"What if Jacob is the one your suppose to be with?"
"Then he blew it!" Nessie yelled. It's was like she had just snapped. It wasn't like Nessie to act like this. But I guess she got control over her tempter because she was more calm when she said-
"I'm done. I'm done being the girl that's so in love with the idea of being loved. I'm just done trying to be with him" she said.
When I heard that all I wanted to do was run inside but then i remembered the reason I wanted to desperately see her today. To tell her about me and Bella. That reason stopped me from going inside because that would Samuel an even bigger chance of being with her.
"Just like that?" Samuel questioned
"You made me see that I was right there where I was 2 years ago. Fantasizing about a relationship I would never have with him"
"That's-That's was not what I intended to do. You were suppose think about what you wanted, tell Jacob you still had feelings for him and that You Are Not Over Him. So you can see where you and him stand" Samuel said. I found it odd that Samuel was saying this.
"You know for someone who claims they like me. You sure as hell want to see me with somebody else" Nessie said and once again her tempter was back. There was this anger in her voice that I couldn't even recognize.
"What better way to getting over someone then to see them perfectly happy with someone else" Samuel said dull and calm. I heard Nessie sigh.
"Sammy-" Samuel cut her off.
"I can't believe you would have the nerve. The DAMN NERVE to complain about being single TO ME!" Samuel yelled but the tone of his voice I knew he was beyond angry but was trying to control his tempter.
"A person that has just confessed to you that he likes you. That he wants you and that he wants to be with you!" Samuel yelled angry and very frustrating then continued.
"You know what I think you do. You like people like Seth and Jacob because deep down you know nothing can happen with them because its easier for you. Because you get to have this delusional fantasy. That stops you from realizing that your vampire, that your all alone. And most likely gonna stay that forever if you continue to act this way!" Samuel said. At this point I was in flames because of the way he was talking to her and I know what he had done. That he had hurt her in ways anyone could. By telling her, she was going to end up alone, that she would have no one. Samuel took at breather and also realized what he had said. Because if there was anything Nessie hated and feared was that she would end up alone
"Nessie-" Samuel was cut off but not by words because I watched run away in vampire speed and the time Samuel came outside, Nessie was long gone
"DAMMIT!" Samuel yelled and punched the wall, breaking into it. He was trying so hard to calm down. But it wasn't working. So I quickly phased back to my human form and about 5 seconds after he snarled and phased. A huge growl escaping from him. I shook my head at him. Knowing that his tempter was not under control. Which was a problem now. I had to tell Sam to get his son under control because if his tempter not controlled properly he would risk exposing himself and worst of all, exposing all of us.
I stuck around. Studying him. I stayed the entire day there. I watched him call about 38 times. Leaving the same voice mail to Nessie but she wasn't answering.
"Hey Ness. I'm sorry about what I said earlier. I would blame it on the whole inner animal thing but that was just me being an ass. I really am sorry so just like last dozens messages I left you. Call Me" Samuel said sounding miserable mixed with guilt.
A Week Later
Nessie called me so we could spend time together during nutrition and lunch because she said her grades had dropped because of all the days she's been absent. Which was odd because her graded were very low C's. But she had like all this homework to do and all this studying. Which I later found out from Seth was she is the one that asked for. She had doing all the classwork and homework she missed during the time she was missing and all the days she missed being with Jeremy at the hospital. Then doing her current classwork and homework plus all the extra credit work she was doing to give back her A in every class.
It was only her and me that hanged out in a table outside the school. The only people that came by were Seth and Jeremy mainly to greet me then leave. It kind of made me wonder if she had asked every she knew to leave her alone because Matt and some other familiar faces went on the opposite side. Occasionally looking over at us. Especially the guys. Nessie seemed fine by me despite what happened with Samuel. Things between us were fine too even though I know she isn't okay deep down. She was acting like she was fine and could believe it because she was talking me like she would talk me like 5 years ago. But now I'm starting to think if this could be a new problem for me now.
It was nutrition and Forks High was an open campus so i could go and see her without any problem. Every time I would go from her school, I would question to myself why she never asked to do this before. Nessie had one earphone plugged in and was talking about this song she was trying to remember the lyrics to because she liked it so much but didn't know the name of the song. I managed to focus on the table were Matt was sitting at. Because all the guys were looking this way and talking.
"Who's that guy sitting with Carlie?" Some random guy asked.
"I thinks his name is Jake or something like that" a blonde girl answered and I think her name was Caroline.
"Are they dating?" Another guy questioned.
"Nah, I don't think so. She would of told us if they were" Bonnie said.
"Carlie always half-asses everything remember. I keep telling you Bonnie she always tells us thinks she wanted to tell us" Caroline said sounding jealous of Nessie.
"You say it like it's a problem Caroline she doesn't have to tell us everything" Matt said basically defending her.
"Whatever. if anything she's not the little saint everyone thinks she is. She's probably screwing that guy-" correction she is jealous of Nessie.
"Shut up Caroline!" Bonnie said cutting Caroline off because Caroline said she was screwing me. Matt picked up his backpack and walked away. Everyone just stood there in the awkward moment and a bit stunned of what Caroline said. It kind of stunned me and also give me uncomfortable thought that I probably shouldn't have in public. Bonnie pulled Caroline away from the group.
"What the hell is wrong with you?! Why do you always have to do that?" Bonnie asked her.
"Because! he has to stop chasing after her. Because you and I both know. That he and Carlie are never doing to be together! We've tried to tell him but he keeps insisting and it's hurting our group" Caroline said mad and walked away. Bonnie went back to their little group and started talking.
"Jacob, your not even listening to me" Nessie said. I shook my head a little and my focus was back on her.
"Sorry, uhh I'm just a bit tired" I said trying to play it off
"Oh. then you should of just slept in and just came to see me at lunch. I would of understood" Nessie said very nicely and politely. I chuckled a little.
"I'm not that tired" I smiled at her.
"You know most of the time. I wish you would of just came to school with me" she said and give me her beautiful smile. I laughed because I wasn't even attending this school and I was already causing problems.
"Yeah. No"
"Come on, it could of been fun. I mean just look at how much fun me, Seth, and Claire are having"
"That's because all of you are friendly. And I'm not friendly" I said and the bell rang.
"Ughh!" She grunted and stood up to leave.
"And you question why I don't want to go to school" I said and my point was made.
"It would be so much easier for me if you were here" she said giving me her sad big chocolate brown eyes.
"I'll back at lunch" I told her and she give me a light and hugged me good bye.
Two Hours Later
I came back at lunch. I was early and stood by the doors waiting for her. The bell rang. I heard the doors being push put with so much force I knew it was Nessie. And she was pissed.
"Hey, you okay?" I asked.
"Oh, I am so NOT okay. I honestly don't know why Claire has so many girl friends. Because some are completely... I don't even know" she angrily said coming down the stairs.
"You wanna talk about it?" I asked. She walked straight pass me. Walking really fast and I just followed. Walking at her pace.
"You are the last person I wanna talk to about this right now" she said very pissed. It always kinda hurt my feelings when Nessie didn't want to talk about her feelings with me. She quickly turned to look at me after slammed her bag on the table.
"Because you make me happy and you have done nothing to deserve. The vamp way I will react to just even recall the conversation I just had" she said. The vamp way? Is that the way she calls her tempter that she has recently picked up on?
Although it made me happy that she didn't want talk about it with me because she didn't want to take her anger out on me. Nessie continued.
"With someone that I thought was one of my best girl friends. So no, I don't wanna talk about the stupidity of high school girl drama" she said calming herself down with every word she spoke. She exhaled and inhaled.
"I need a cookie" she said and grabbed my hand as she forced to me walk at her speed as we entered the school. Nessie let good of my hand and just walked with angry look on her face. People stared at us. A lot of random guys said hello to her. She said it back but it was more like a relax when they would say "Hi" a second later she would say it back. Without even looking at the guy who said it.
Nessie knocked on room 162 and from all the good smell I was getting it was the cooking class. Nessie knocked on the door and a woman opened the door.
"Hi, Ms. Lance" Nessie nicely greeted.
"Ms. Masen. What bring you by today?" She questioned.
"Oh. you remember when you told me that whenever I was hungry or wanted something sweet to stop by" Nessie said trying to not sound angry.
"Having a bad day?" The woman asked. Nessie closed her eyes and nodded. The woman opened up the door and Nessie walked inside and I followed. The woman eyes widen as she saw me. She looked kind of young to be a teacher.
"Oh. And this is my friend Jacob" Nessie said.
"Hello" I greeted but she stood there just looking at me.
"Hi. You don't come here? do you?" She asked.
"No. I don't" I said.
"Okay" she said and nodded.
"Okay, good" she said. Nessie and I just looked at her weird because she was acting weird. But for me it was normal and obvious that she found me very attractive.
"I'm just gonna go. Get the left over pasties from today that didn't fit on the trays" she said and awkwardly walked away.
When she came back she had a big tray of all these different mini pasties.
"You guys can ate everything" she said her eyes not moving away from me.
"I'll be in the teachers's lounge. I'll be back in the began of 5th period. Don't let anyone else inside" she said as she was leaving. When she was closed the door. I looked at Nessie who already eating the cookies.
"Why does she let you-" Nessie cut me off.
"I do her taxes" she said and sat on the table near the pastries. She offered me a cookie. I smiled and walked towards the table and sat on a chair near her.
We ate just about everything. I left the cookies for her because I knew they were her favorite. We were in the classroom talking about random things. Nessie jumped off the tabled and went go charge her phone. Which was only a couple of steps away. She sat on the counter as her phone charged. Even though she did want to tell me why she was mad. I didn't like to see her that way because she had this sad yet angry look on her face.
"You know the cookies didn't make you feel better" I said. Nessie look up from her phone to look at me.
"I just don't understand girls" she said. Sometimes I give even understand her. I chuckled.
"Well that makes both of us" I said.
"You know my blonde friend Caroline. She completely flipped out on me. She just snapped at me. Like she really hurt my feelings but she pissed me off at the same time. I just wanted slam her into the wall just so she can shut up" Nessie said and I chuckled.
"So why, she snap at you?" I asked.
"Apparently, she has a crush on Matt" i knew that Blonde one was jealous of Nessie. It was obvious that she was. And every girl should be because Nessie is perfect. She is beautiful, kind, caring, smart and i can just go on and on. But I guess it also a cure being perfect because you get hated on. And that because Nessie doesn't try to be and if she did. Vampires won't be the only ones coming to kill her.
"And is pissed at me because I didn't know about it. Even though SHE DID NOT TELL ME in the first place!" She yelled angrierly which puzzeled me.
"See I'm sorry I told you. I hate yelling you" she said once again calming down. I don't know if its been hard on her this pass a couple of months but I've noticed since Nessie came back from being missing. She's different like her tempter is like mine basically. She's becoming a lot more angry. And it was starting to worry me
"It's fine" I said and faked a smiled.
"You know so far this has been the worst year of my life" Nessie said and leaned on the wall and looked up at the ceiling.
"I need a hug" Nessie said extending her arms towards me and pouting her bottom lip so she can look even sadder. I chuckled and smiled big because she looked really cute. I walked to her and hugged her. I immediately smelled her hair which smelled like pomegranate and was new but I still loved it. I could smell her skin that smelled like vanilla that I loved even more and I know that she always wear it because I love it so much. As I was getting lost in her scent. She spoke.
"Did you eat all the mini Cannoli cream cups with the mini chocolate chips on top?" She asked pulling me away from the hug.
"No" I said. Nessie walked over to the tray and started eating.
"I really have to stop stress eating" she said and I chuckled because it was true. She does stress eat a lot.
"Oh, one good thing did happened to today. I have an A in Math and English again" Nessie said proud clapped for herself. I smiled and walked towards.
"So I have less work to do now" she informed.
"So does that mean I get to see you more?" I asked. She look up at me and smiled.
"That's exactly what it means... The bell is gonna ring in like 14 minutes. I should start cleaning up" she said once she ate the last Cannoli cup.
"You want some help?" I asked as she walked to the back of the room where there was another room where all the other cooking stuff where stored. Nessie turned around to look at me.
"Do ask because you know I'm gonna say no or do you really want to help clean?" She questioned. I knew Nessie loved to clean which she also knew that I knew.
"It's depends on your answer" I said.
"No" she answered and smiled.
"Then I ask you because I really want to help" I joked and she just continued to smiled and walked to the back of the room.
Once the bell had rang for Nessie to go to class. I had to leave so I said bye and we agreed to see each other later that evening.
Four Hours Later
I decide to go to Jeremy's in my wolf form earlier than we have agreed on. Nessie would be getting home around now and I wanted to caught her before somebody else did but I was to late. Someone had been sitting in the back of the house porch swing. Nessie and I arrived at the same time. As Nessie closed her car door, she heard the person stepping down the porch step.
"Jeremy!" She called as walked towards the back of the house. When Nessie made it to the back of house. Nessie was stunned to see Samuel. While Samuel happy and nervous to see her.
"Hey" he greeted but Nessie didn't say a thing.
"You haven't returned any of my calls" he said.
"Yeah I know. I sat with my phone in my hand staring at it as it rang" she said.
"Yeah, i thought you did. Thats why i decided to come see you instead. Can we talked?" Samuel asked. Nessie looked away and scratched her head a bit, she annoyed.
"Look, there nothing you've told me that I haven't already heard in your voice mails before. So just leave. I don't wanna see you" Nessie said and walked away
"I really like you" Samuel said that made Nessie stop right in her tracks. She turned to look at Samuel.
"I lied to you when I told you that it wasn't your fault that I phased. Because it's clear to me that it was. Ness, you told me more things then just the fact that you didn't see me that way. I felt like you had completely stomped on my heart after I just gave it to you. I told you what you wanted to hear because i saw how guilty you felt" Samuel said. Nessie and I both shocked listening to him say. That he really did phased because of Nessie. Which I could not believe because Nessie doesn't have a vampire scent and that's what makes us phased. So I still wasn't believing he phased because of her.
"You were the one that flipped out and got all crazy which made me crazy. I was on edge of phasing. What I smelled, was you. I didn't smelled the vampire that was near until i had already happened" he said. Nessie looking more puzzeled then shocked at this moment.
"I liked you. I liked you so much that it pissed me off that you rejected me for someone I knew. Someone that I now have to refer to like my 'brother' or something but whatever. The fact that you have me and still want him. Drives me crazy. And that probably explains why I'm having trouble with this because you don't deserve that. And you sure as hell don't deserve to be put through that. But I get it. you know girls always choose the bad ones" Samuel said. Nessie stood there not knowing but to say.
"Maybe. Maybe if you wouldn't have never left. Things would be different" she told him. Samuel took a few steps closer to her.
"No, no. Don't tell me that because I'm already pissed off at my dad for giving me this stupid gene. I don't need to have a reason to hate him now"
"It's complicated Sammy maybe if you let me get my head straight. And over think and over analyze everything that can possibly go wrong with what I'm about to tell you..." Nessie moved closer to Samuel.
"Just promise me you won't get over this just because you see some slut in a skirt" she joked and chuckled.
"Don't get over me so quickly. I might just wanna be with you too" she said. That was the point where I completely just blew up in flames but the same time when I really thought about the way those 8 word sounded coming out of her mouth. It was more like I was feeling sad and disappointed in myself for even letting her move on from me and on to Samuel.
Samuel's face lit up immediately.
"But maybe if you can give me like some time to-" Samuel her off.
"No" he just said out of no where.
"I'm not like you Ness. I wanna be someone's first choice. You asking me for time means-" Nessie cut him off.
"No. Sammy it's not like that. I'm just asking for time so I can-" Samuel cut Nessie off.
"We may live a long time but that's the one thing. I can't give you. Because your not seeing this from my point of view. Nessie your asking me for time! But believe me if i wasn't so self-confidence and if I had a say in this and if I wouldn't have almost killed you. I wouldn't mind being your last choice, in fact I would have just loved to be an option for someone like you"
"Don't think of it that way"
"There's no other way to think about it"
"Sammy, all I'm asking is for time to t-"
"This is way bigger than my big head because I physically can't do this with you" Samuel said in this pain and restraint. Looking like he didn't want to say any of this.
"Sammy, just let me explain-"
"I can't do this with you Nessie! I have to stay away from you" he said again with pain and restraint. He walked away but Nessie speeded in front of him. Then pushed him making him lose his balance but he didn't fall. Samuel looked at the ground.
"You don't have to! Just tell me that YOU want to! Don't sugar code anything!" Nessie yelled but Samuel didn't say a thing until Nessie started to walk away.
"This is not what I want!" Samuel said following after her. Nessie turned around.
"Then you don't know what you want! You tell me you like me and when I give you hope you tell me you can't! Maybe you are right about me Sammy maybe I just keep picking the wrong people to like" Nessie said and began to walk away but Samuel grabbed her by her arm to stop her.
"You liked me?" Samuel asked surprised. Nessie scoffed and pulled her arm away from his grab and push him to create more space between them. Samuel look a bit mad that Nessie pushed him again.
"I'm surprised Claire hasn't opened her big mouth by now but this is exactly what i told her would happen. I didn't want to make it seem like because Jacob didn't want me like oh me move on to the next available Quilleute"
"Ness. I just need you to know that it's not what you think. I can't be with you because of Jacob... Figure out exactly what you feel, tell him and if it doesn't work. Then come find me but until then... Nessie I think it'll be easier for the both of us if I just-" Nessie cut him off with tears forming in her eyes.
"Please don't say it" she said closing her eyes.
"Stay away from you" he whispered.
"So your just gonna walk away?" She questioned. Samuel didn't look at her and just looked at the ground and nodded.
"Is this what you really want?" She asked.
"No of course not. But it's what I'm doing. " he whispered again. Nessie stood there a second and just exhaled and then nodded as a tear came down each cheek. That same second Nessie was gone. She was in the house. Samuel just stood there as well. Probably questioning what he had just done. He dropped to his knees. Then his hands curled up and turned into fist. With all his strength he slammed his fist on the ground and began to breathe heavily. I phased back into my human form knowing he would be phasing any second. I didn't want him to know I was there or that I just listened to everything. Just like I predicted Samuel phased.
Now I caught in between comforting Nessie or having to take care of this kid that probably hates me at this point because he couldn't take things with Nessie to another level because I had imprinted on her. She was mine and as a wolf he physically can't take her away from me.
As Samuel ran into the forest and in my human form. I was going to follow him and make sure he doesn't do any thing stupid. I saw from my peripheral vision, Nessie standing by the window with tears coming down her face watching as Samuel ran off into the woods in his wolf form.
Around the time I was suppose to see Nessie today. She texted me and told me that she had a long day and that she was going to go to sleep early.
*Thanks for reading. I know many are desperately waiting for Nessie and Jacob to be together but I ask that you please me patient because we have a lot more chapters before he even tells her how he feels. Everything will come together soon because unlike most stories I wanted to give Nessie options and I wanted to give Jacob options too because if you overlooked their relationship it's odd a vampire with a wolf. So there clearly not natural match for each other. So I thinking giving both choices other than each other gives my story a bit of an edge so sorry if your looking for them to be together because it's not going to happen anytime soon but once again I appreciate you checking in on my story and follow me on Instagram AlphaMaleJacob74 :)