Hi everyone! I'm really sorry for the incredibly late update. I said I was about to write about Mark's funeral and I will do that, only not in this chapter. It'll most likely appear in the next chapter.

I hope you enjoy this chapter, it is a little longer than the others, but since you all had to wait so very long, see this as an apologise for the long wait.

CALLIOPE

It was 5 a.m. when she arrived home. Callie sighed. Only two hours and a half before my day actually begins and I've been in the OR for four hours.
Callie opened the door and walked straight to the bedroom when she found Arizona lying on the floor, in foetal position, her gaze resting on the horizon, her blue eyes empty.

"Arizona, are you ok?!" Callie's voice was two octaves higher than usual when she ran towards her wife. She immediately checked her wife's pulse. When she felt Arizona's heartbeat she sighed relieved.

The blue eyes flashed towards her, before turning back to the horizon.

"Are you ok?"

Her wife neglected her question.
"Arizona, please, answer…"

The paediatrician fixated her eyes on Callie's, who shivered at the sight of Arizona's empty gaze, thinking this couldn't be happening. Arizona was doing so well yesterday and now she was lying miserably on the floor of the living room. Callie closed her eyes. This couldn't be happening. Not after yesterday, not after having the hope everything would eventually turn out right. She grabbed Arizona's hand: "What happened?"

"Sofia cried…" she said, fixating on Callie's eyes, "So I wanted to check if everything was okay, but I…"

Callie watched her wife. Arizona's bright blue irises were at the upper right corner of her eyes, staring at some point in the ceiling. Callie knew this meant she was about to cry, so she quickly grabbed her wife's hand.

"I managed to reach the living room," Arizona cleared her throat, "but I fell down and I… I can't even get past our own living room, Callie!"

Callie let out a soft pain cry when Arizona almost crushed her right hand in her sudden anger.

"I can't even get past our living room! Imagine something happened to Sofia and I couldn't…"

Callie watched Arizona's blue irises getting darker.

"I can't even walk five metres!" Tears filled her eyes.

Callie came sitting next to her: "You've walked five metres today. That's five metres more than yesterday. That's all the amount of baby steps you can expect from your body for today."

They both stared at the same imaginary point in front of them. "Actually I ran four metres and rolled the last one…"
They both chuckled.

"But you've reached much more today. You got out of bed, you want to walk and that's… a whole marathon…"

Arizona turned her head to the left and watched Callie's profile: "Are comparing me with Neil Armstrong? That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind?"

Callie threw her head in her neck and smiled: "No, what you did today was even better."

Arizona stared in front of her and Callie rested her head on the blonde's shoulder.
"I missed this," the Latina whispered.

Arizona stared in front of her, not willing to answer 'I missed this too' but instead she said: "Where are my crutches?"

Callie raised her eyebrows: "Planning on reaching Jupiter today?"

She watched her wife moving through the room, still quite insecure about her movements.
"You should take a rest," Callie whispered, still scared that if she said it out too loud, everything would go back as it was two days ago. Arizona lying motionless in bed, Mark being dead and Callie being the only one who had to try keeping up with the world, although she felt exhausted and at the end of her powers. As tough something within her seemed to grow and gnawed every bit of energy she had.

Arizona ignored her and moved across the kitchen: "You know, I hate it that I can't carry anything…"

Callie raised an eyebrow: "Arizona, I'm serious, you should take a rest. You could overload a shoulder, remember you've been in bed for the past month, your muscles…."

The blue eyes immediately flashed towards her. Callie gave her a tired smile: "You should really take a rest, Arizona. I mean it."

"Callie," she came closer to the Latina, "I'm not tired at all. I can do a couple of more laps…"

Callie closed her eyes, knowing this was the very moment the nauseating feeling was about to escape: "Well, maybe I am tired, Arizona! Ever thought of that? Or where you too busy lying in our bed, while I had to work twice as hard as usual, while you made me sleep in the bed of my best friend, who died only a month ago, while I had to take care for our daughter, while all I wanted to do was cry, because Mark died out there!"

Arizona froze somewhere between her and the coffee table and stared at the space in between.

"Mark died! And I… I think of him every day, every second and I can't even cry, because if I do, I'll… I'll be the one who won't come out of the bedroom," she wiped the tears out of her eyes with the back of her hand and took a couple of deep breaths.

Arizona opened her mouth to say something, anything, but her mind was blank.

Callie cleared her throat: "As long as I have to take care for you I can't cry over Mark, because I'm so scared that once I stop fighting, you will too. You are the reason I can't cry over my best friend, Arizona. So please, don't say you're not tired at all, because I am exhausted…"

Arizona watched Callie turning around and walking towards the door. The blonde frowned and sprinted towards the door and placed her right crutch in the doorpost: "I won't apologise, Calliope," she said, her voice carrying something Callie couldn't exactly define.

Callie sighed and stepped over the crutch: "I'll sleep at Mark's."

"Did you hear me, Calliope?"

The Latina raised an eyebrow and looked over her shoulder, while searching the key of Mark's apartment.

"Did you hear me?!" Callie stared at Arizona for a couple of seconds, surprised by the sudden strength of her wife's voice.

"Did you hear me?!"

Callie avoided her gaze, before slamming the door shut: "YES, ARIZONA, I HEARD YOU!"

But Arizona repeated her action and placed her crutch once again in a doorpost. The wood made a strange splinter noise and Callie felt her weight bouncing back from the door.

Arizona pushed her weight against the door, while Callie tried to push the crutch back out.

"Callie, listen to me," Arizona said, gritting through her teeth, "I won't apologise for locking myself up after I survived a plane crash and lost almost my entire left leg. Therefore I do not apologise. But I do apologise for not giving you any rest at all. I'm giving you some rest now and I promise I won't give up. I won't give up upon you or Sofia."

There was a silence for a couple of seconds before Callie stopped pushing against the door. There was a loud bang, which was almost immediately followed by a loud: "OUCH!" and a "Are you alright?"

Callie stepped back, her head still spinning from the blow from the door.
Arizona jumped in, one of her crutches was lying on the floor: "Oh god, I'm so sorry, Calliope. I thought you kept pushing the door, because you were still angry…" Arizona hopped closer towards her and carefully moved Callie's hands that covered her nose, "Oh crap, it's bleeding… I'm so sorry, Callie… Eh, wait here, I'll go get some ice…"

On her way back she met the meddlesome lady from 508, who asked: "Is everything alright?"

Arizona muttered: "Yeah sure, everything is fine, my wife is going through an emotional crisis, I've only lost my left leg and I've probably broken my wife's nose..."
She jumped her way to the freezer and finally landed next to Callie, who kept repeating the word "ouch".
"I am so sorry, Callie," she said, taking a closer look at her wife's nose, "Well, it doesn't look broken to me…"

"It sure feels like it…" Callie gritted through her teeth.

Arizona gave her a nervous look and wrapped the ice in a towel, "This might hurt a little," she said, before carefully applying it.

ARIZONA

She stared guilty at the swollen nose of her wife and gave her a nervous smile.

"It looks like crap, doesn't it?" Callie asked.

"Well, the word crap might be a little…"

"Are you really sure it isn't broken?" Callie asked childishly.

Arizona gave her a careful smile: "I am really sure, Calliope. I recognise a broken nose when I see one… But you'll have some bruising… Do you want a painkiller?"

Callie nodded greedily and leant backwards: "And to say you've only wanted to give me some rest."

Arizona smiled: "Yeah, well, I guess the neighbours will suspect me from domestic violence. It looks like I've beaten the crap out of you with one of my crutches."

Callie smiled carefully and greedily took the painkiller from Arizona's hand. The blonde took the ice and carefully removed a lock of Callie's raven black hair that was hanging in front of her brown eyes. Her hand stopped somewhere in the space between them. Arizona lowered her hand and dropped the ice, captivated by the sudden intensity of Callie's brown eyes. It felt like a strange mixture between a déjà-vu and a fantastic memory. It had the same rapid and stunning effect of a déjà-vu, but the same comforting, warm feeling of a happy memory. Her fingertips carefully stroked Callie's cheek. The Latina's mouth corners curled up in a smile.
"I'm sorry," Arizona whispered.

Callie smiled: "Don't be. Things just happen and sometimes we can't do anything at all."

Arizona looked down at was left of her left leg: "You shouldn't feel sorry for this," she said.

Callie sighed, while she took Arizona's hand: "But I do."

Arizona sighed and gave Callie a small kiss on her cheek: "You did the right thing. Even if that meant amputating my leg. It was the right thing."

Arizona watched a tear rolling over Callie's cheek, who sobbed: "Thank you," and embraced the blonde.

She opened her eyes and quickly turned over, breathing heavily and tried to sit up straight, searching for the comforting weak shine that came from the alarm clock.
3: 53 a.m.
Arizona forced herself to take a couple of deep breaths and focussed on her surroundings. The soft mattress underneath her, the faint light of the alarm clock, the sound of Seattle overnight. "You aren't in the woods," she whispered to herself and tried to hear Callie's comforting breathing when she realised her wife wasn't lying next to her. Arizona stared at the shadow where Callie's body was supposed to be. The longer she stared, petrified by the thought she was gone, the impenetrable darkness became a vibrating grey and Arizona could see the contours of her wife caught in the mattress. She carefully placed her hand on the place where her wife used to sleep and felt the weak warmth that was still caught on the surface. Arizona looked at the other side and reached out to grab her crutches and with a unsecure push she managed to stand up. She looked at the traces her body had left during the restless sleep and sighed, fearing she might have woken Callie.

She found her wife standing in the middle of Mark's apartment, the moonlight shining on her raven black hair. Arizona hesitated for a second, but walked in. Callie turned around, hearing the sound of the crutches.

"I couldn't sleep," the Latina whispered, her eyes tracing every spot of the flat.

Arizona moved closer: "I couldn't sleep either."

Callie's right mouth corner curled up slightly: "I noticed."

Arizona looked down, at her right foot and the empty space that was underneath the left side of her body. She smiled faintly at the thought she was still surprised at seeing only one foot.

"I'm sorry if I waked you up," she said.

Callie let out a small chuckle: "You didn't, because I didn't fall asleep at all. I just… stared at the darkness, thinking about him."

After a couple of minutes, Callie was the first to break the silence: "The funeral is in five days and I… He asked me to take care of his funeral. Me of all people…"

"You were very important to him, Callie," Arizona said and came standing next to Callie, "I never really understood you guys, which was a reason why I had such difficulty with Mark. He was more than a best friend to you…" Arizona looked at her wife's profile and followed her example and stared at the apartment, "which drove me crazy at some point, but on…" she swallowed and cleared her throat, "but on Tim's birthday I finally understood you two," Arizona stared at the family portrait on the boudoir. You two were exactly like Tim and me," she whispered, "He was a brother to you when your real family left you."
When she returned her gaze to Callie, she noticed the tears that shone in the moonlight on her wife's cheeks.

The next morning she found Callie going through a pile of photo albums.
"Good morning," she said, announcing her arrival, so Callie wouldn't be alarmed by her sudden appearance.

"Morning," Callie said, grabbing a tissue from the tissue box that stood next to the pile of albums.

"Do you want some coffee?" Arizona asked while moving towards the coffee-maker.
Callie muttered something that sounded like "Yes," and Arizona held on to the kitchen dresser while trying to take two cups out of the cupboard without falling. She smiled at her little victory and hopped on one crutch towards the coffee-maker. Moments later she listened to the warm buzz of the coffee-maker and the moving of Callie's fingertips across photo's.
When the last drop of coffee landed in the cup, Arizona turned over to Callie: "Eh, Callie…"

Her wife looked up, her eyes red and watery: "Yes?"

"I might need some help," Arizona said, while pointing at her crutches. Callie jumped to her feet and on her way she grabbed the crutch Arizona had left at the cupboard and took the two cups to the table.

She was staring at the impenetrable grey formation that covered the sky, thinking it was a typical rainy day in Seattle, when Callie suddenly whined dramatically: "I can't even find the right picture! How am I supposed to take care for a funeral when I can't even find a stupid photo he would have liked."
Arizona raised her eyebrows: "I'm pretty sure Mark liked every photo he was on." Callie gave her a cold look, but Arizona continued: "but if you would ask me, I would take the one we made last summer, when Sofia finally said Daddy for the first time…"
The sobbing slowed down, two bloodshot brown eyes found hers and Arizona saw the stunning smile of her wife appearing.

CALLIOPE

"What is it?" she asked, looking at Arizona's face.
The blonde threw a quick look at her and kept staring in front of her.

"I'm just… scared… I mean… Sofia hasn't seen me like… like this," she whispered.

Callie gave her a comforting smile: "I'm sure she'll be very happy to see you."

"What if she gets scared at the sight of me," the blue eyes panicky searched hers, "She has never seen anyone without a leg. She has never seen me without my blanket…"

"Stop worrying, Arizona. Sofia has been asking over and over for you, so I think the least of her worries is that you miss a leg."

"I hope so," Arizona muttered, listening to the sound that came from the baby monitor.
Callie gave her another comforting smile: "I'll go get her out of bed."

Two minutes later she carried her daughter to the living room, to find Arizona looking at them both nervously. When Sofia caught sight of the blonde, she started wrestling herself out of Callie's grip, saying: "Mommy!"

Callie noticed a tear appearing in Arizona's eye.
The Latina placed her daughter on the ground and watched her walking in that typical bumpy toddler way towards her wife. But somewhere in the middle Sofia slowed down and Callie heard Arizona's breathing freeze. And for a couple of seconds, Callie had the feeling her daughter was far older than her actual age, when she met the doubting gaze of Sofia. Her eyes looked exactly like Mark's when she stared at Callie in confusion. Callie recognised the feeling underneath it; fear. Fear that it was just a dream, that if she ran too enthusiastically towards Arizona, she would dissolve into thin air and there would only be emptiness between the palms of her hands. Callie had always been surprised by the cleverness of her daughter, how fast she had understood that Arizona didn't want to play with her, that Mommy was in pain and Callie noticed that Sofia was always more silent when Arizona was around.

She gave Sofia a small nod and watched her daughter running towards Arizona, who couldn't stop crying for the next five minutes and carried a blissful smile for the rest of the day.

Alright, as usual I would love to know what your thoughts are, so please leave me a review. They truly make my day :)

Oh, and if any of you has a suggestion for Mark's funeral (songs, quotes, etc.), feel free to send me a private message or leave a review.

Thank you for reading :D