6. Below My Feet

CALLIOPE

"Tomorrow," Callie answered Addison's question.
The redhead opened her mouth to ask how late her plain would land, but the giggling of Arizona and Nick was louder. She rolled her eyes, sighed and repeated her question.
Callie didn't listen any longer. Her eyes were drawn to the two best friends who were fighting over a piece of chocolate.
"Mine!" Arizona yelled, while Nick tried to get grip on her hands.
"I saw it first!" he said louder.
Arizona laughed, while she managed to avoid his grasping hands "Yeah, but I got it first and I'm gonna eat it first!"
Addison sighed loudly, realising Callie wasn't listening and the other two had been acting like two small kids for over three days. She thought her head was going to explode. Arizona and Nick seemed to take a lot of place in the flat and the thought another person had to join them seemed impossible. "I'm going to Mark's apartment," she said, hoping Callie would follow. But the Latina kept staring at the duo in the couch. Sofia laughed loudly and joined the game and started tickling Nick, who yelled loudly that that wasn't fair. Arizona said: "Grab his crutches, Sofia!"
But instead her daughter grabbed her own crutches.
The toddler crossed the apartment with one way to large crutch behind her, laughing loudly when Nick said: "Way to go, Sofia!" before he was pushed down on his back in the soft leather by Arizona.
Callie frowned. That couldn't be healthy for his aching spine. He probably didn't feel anything due to the high doses of painkillers he took. The next moment she looked at them Nick had managed to switch places with her wife, who lied on her back, her arms stretched above her head, in an attempt to save the chocolate. Sofia was still running with the crutch, peeking over her shoulder every now and then to see if there was any reaction from her Mommy, who seemed, in Callie's opinion, very busy to ruin their leather couch by covering it with chocolate.
"Callie, can we please go to Mark's place? My head is killing me…" Addison asked, trying to ignore the noise from the two adult children.
But Callie didn't even noticed her best friend. Her eyes were locked on Arizona and Nick, who were still struggling. Arizona tried to block him using her knee, her hands still stretched above her head. He dove forward and Arizona's right leg couldn't carry his weight and he fell on her. At that very moment something in Callie snapped and she screamed: "STOP IT!" so loud that Addison spilled some water she was pouring in her glass, Sofia dropped the crutch, Nick lost all balance and landed on the floor and Arizona asked: "You're okay?"
Nick, slowly managed to get up and nodded. Arizona's head turned towards Callie, who still couldn't believe she actually wanted to hit Nick with his crutches.
Addison saw the look in the Latina's eyes and grabbed Sofia and walked out of the flat as quickly as possible. After her Nick followed, after quickly saying: "I'm sorry," to Callie. Arizona gave her wife an angry look.
Callie sat down and sighed loudly. Arizona kept staring at her and finally asked: "What was that?"
"You… I couldn't take it any longer…"
Arizona frowned: "You couldn't take it any longer I was having fun with my best friend, 'cause you and Mark…"
"We are not going to mention Mark here, Arizona! Because I never struggled with him over a piece of chocolate while he was lying on top of me…"
Arizona raised an eyebrow: "Oh, that's what this is about?! About the fact Nick accidentally fell on me…"
Callie yelled: "For days, for weeks, for months, I want to touch you and you don't allow me to, you flee, you start crying when I make the slightest move towards you and Nick, who disappears out of your life for how long; can touch you?"
Arizona stared at her wife for a couple of seconds in complete disbelief and started laughing: "Are you being jealous? Jealous of a guy who's been my best friend since my seventh birthday? Really Calliope?"
Callie stared at her laughing wife, not understanding why Arizona was laughing: "That's not funny!"
The blonde took a breath to recover from her laughing: "It is, Calliope! Because you are the one who told me not to be jealous because of Mark… and now you meet Nick and you're completely jealous…" she stopped for a second to laugh and continued: "And it's quite funny, because not only are you jealous of my best friend, you completely know I have nothing at all with men… You have told me not to be jealous because of Mark, even though he is the father of our daughter and you slept with him… And now you, who told me not to be jealous, get angry because Nick and I are fighting over a piece of chocolate? You've got to admit that's quite funny, Calliope…"
Callie stared at her laughing wife: "I'm not jealous because of Nick, I'm jealous he can touch you and I can't!"
Arizona's laughter died. She cleared her throat and said: "There's no use in being jealous of a dying man, Calliope."
She stared at Callie, who avoided her gaze.

ADDISON

She looked at Mark's flat. Studied the walls, inspected the few pictures on the wall and the cups that were still on the table. The only things that had changed since the flight were in the bathroom: Callie's toothbrush was still there, and a pile of fresh towels. Addison kept walking through the flat, as though Mark would appear out of nowhere. She let her gaze slide over the pictures of him and Sofia and couldn't help but wonder how she didn't notice he had changed so much and why she only saw it now. She let her hand slide over the table, and looked at the trace it left in the dust. She noticed Nick, who was sitting in the couch, followed her movements.
"It's strange," she said, "I thought I knew Mark, but now he's dead, I see these sides of him I never could've expected…"
Nick raised his eyebrows: "That's the strangest thing about dying, I guess… Suddenly all judgements evaporate, the masks you wear for certain people fall down and all that is left is you… and the strangest thing is that only a few people won't be surprised to finally see you."
Addison stared at him for a while, his vivid brown eyes that were so contrasting with his pale skin and his hollow cheeks.
"And because most people don't recognise you, they start creating this image of you, your heroic deeds, your positive aspects… Scared, because in the few seconds they finally saw you, they didn't recognise you and they realised they missed such great parts of your life. So they start reconstructing your life, giving it the direction they want… hoping they would recognise it then… Only a handful of people won't…"
Addison stared in silence at him and then stared at the flat of Mark. How everything was still standing in the exact same place as when he left. She looked at the trace her fingertips had made in the dust on the kitchen table and finally saw how careful Callie had been, when she slept in this flat. Her toothbrush, the towels and the sheets had betrayed her presence, and Addison could almost feel the pain she felt, destroying one of these last touchable memories of Mark. How much of an intruder she must have felt.
She turned around and saw Nick standing carefully before the window, trembling on his good leg, as though he had immediately noticed Callie's fear of leaving traces in the only room she could still feel Marks' presence.
With every breath she took, Addison saw more traces she had ruined. How she had silently marked the room with her presence, by making traces in the dust, by moving doors, by opening a window…
"Do you mind if we go outside?" she asked.

NICK

He stared at Sofia, how she looked at the fish in the pond and how she pointed at them, laughing, making sure Addison wouldn't miss one of them.
He supressed the urge to do the same thing as the little girl. It was strange, but now he realised he was dying, all things seemed more beautiful than ever. It was as though he still had to discover the whole world, just like Sofia. In some ways, her presence made him feel more calmly than ever. She noticed the small things and enjoyed them, while the adults he talked to didn't understand the beauty of those things.

ARIZONA

She looked at Nick and noticed the shock was over. She had become used of his pale face and the small coughs that followed after his laughter. It had stopped feeling like knives in her stomach when she noticed her friend was ill. In a certain way, he seemed getting healthier each day.
She watched him building houses with Sophia and smiled. He would have been an amazing father, if he would've ever decided to be one. She grabbed one of her crutches and came sitting next to her daughter and looked at Nick: "Why did we wait so long to see each other again?"
He gave her a bitter smile: "Because I thought we had oceans of time."
"You weren't the only one… I never searched for you…" she said, building the roof of Sofia's farmhouse.
"You had no idea where I was…"
She interrupted him: "That doesn't mean I didn't had to search for you…"
He laughed: "But you didn't and I must say I'm quite happy seeing you've spent your time so well. Look at you, Arizona… you have a beautiful wife and a wonderful daughter, you've helped a bunch of kids in Africa… I can hardly think of better ways to spend your time…"
She looked at him and whispered: "Thank you…"
He smiled softly: "Don't thank me, Arizona, I'm thankful I can spend my last days here."

CALLIOPE

The past days had been weighing heavily on Calliope Torres. With every day Arizona's movements got better, but the more progress she made, the more Nick was getting weaker. Callie watched her wife helping him through the crowded flat. Addison saw the fear in her eyes. The fear of being completely powerless. She couldn't prevent Nick from dying right beneath her wife's nose, nor could she prevent her wife from getting more attached to him. Even Sofia liked him, and even though there was no biological bond between her and Arizona, Callie saw certain resemblances in their expressions when Nick made jokes.
When Addison and Sofia went to the grocery store and Arizona was to her physical training, he said: "I'm sorry for all the troubles…"
She looked at him from the kitchen: "Oh no, it's fine… it's fine, Nick…"
He laughed shortly and coughed: "I tried, you know… dying alone… But I couldn't"
She walked closer to him, her hands still wet from cleaning the vegetables: "Nobody should," she said, thinking of the day Mark died.
"Yet I'm sorry I have to do it here…"
"Don't be sorry…"
"But I have nowhere else to go… My father died after I graduated and my mother has got Alzheimers and my only sister… well… Arizona probably told you the story so I… I'm sorry for all the troubles, Callie…"
"Nick, you really don't have to apologise…"
"I get it though, he said… Arizona and I make a lot of noise and… well, I understand your fear of what'll happen to her when I die, and Sofia doesn't deserve to know another person who died. And my sister will arrive today… And you don't even know me that well… But you have to believe me when I say I am incredibly happy to be here…"
Callie looked at him: "What kind of person is your sister?"
He laughed: "She's adventurous, smart, funny, has a lack of rules, is careless, has an endless list of plans, sometimes she's a bit reckless and has an enormous amount of energy, combined with her typical stubbornness. Oh and she is very independent and doesn't forgive easily…"
Callie smiled: "You don't forgive easily either…"
Nick was about to ask what she meant, but realised she meant the fact he still hadn't forgiven himself.

ADDISON

She opened the door and saw a black haired woman, her green eyes flashed from her to the paper she held in her hand.
"Does Arizona Robins live here?" she asked.
Addison heard the silence fall over the apartment. "Yes, she does. You must be Joanne…" she answered and let the other woman enter. Joanne shook her hand and looked at the apartment and quickly found Arizona sitting in the coach.
Callie, who was standing in the kitchen didn't miss the smile of both woman. She knew she had to go closer, to welcome the new guest, but still she wanted to observe her from the kitchen.
"How was your flight?" Arizona asked.
"Good," Joanne answered before looking at Addison and said: "I had no idea at all you were in to redheads…"
Arizona laughed: "Oh no, that's Addison, she's a friend of Callie."
"Who's Callie?" Joanne quickly asked.
Callie took a big breath and stepped forward when Arizona answered the question: "My wife."
Joanne looked from Callie to Arizona. Callie didn't miss the bitter smile on her face.
"You're married?" she asked, failing to hide the tone of surprise in her voice.
Arizona nodded, inviting Callie to sit next to her.
It took Joanne a couple of seconds to recover from that surprise: "Really? This is not one of your funny jokes?" she said, staring Arizona.
A small cough announced that Nick had stopped sleeping and he stepped closer: "I know it's hard to believe, but believe me, once you get to know Callie, you'll get it."
Joanne turned around to see her brother standing in the doorpost that led to the bedroom. Although she heard the weakness in his voice, she was still chocked to see how the image she saw was her brother.
"You should have called me earlier," she said, still staring at the person she hardly recognised as her brother.

JOANNE

It was strange to see Arizona with her wife and daughter. The words still felt strange. She and Arizona had been so much alike... They had the same vision on life, on relationships… Their lives had shown so much resemblances, but now Arizona was married, had a child and she was still wandering, discovering the world alone. Looking at the family portraits she realised how much their worlds had parted since the last time she had seen Arizona. And now, seeing the life Arizona had, a soft voice within Joanne whispered that she had always been wrong about Arizona. That the years they spent together, sharing the same ideas, had been nothing more than lies. Yet she knew that wasn't true. When Arizona talked to her and Nick, she noticed the soft voice was lying. That made it all more complicated. How Arizona could still be the same person she fell in love with, only bound to responsibilities. It made her doubt her own ideas about relationships. She had always believed relationships forced you to become somebody you weren't. That making the compromises that were part of a relationships slowly took pieces of you. As though you were forcing two rocks to form one, and small pieces were crushed during that process. And in the end the rocks weren't the ones they were at the beginning and when they split, as most relationships did, both rocks still carried the scars of that process, they had lost pieces of their selves. It was a cruel process, in Joanne's eyes. She had seen how her parents had crushed each other during that process and she was convinced that relationships rarely ended in good things. But now, seeing Arizona and Callie, she saw an entirety, that still respected individuals.
Joanne held her head a bit to the right and looked at Arizona and suddenly had the strange feeling her life still hadn't started yet.