'Kevin? Say something. Where are you?' Patrick pleaded urgently, holding his breath, willing Kevin to break the silence. He sensed Agustin and Dominic watching him, and he moved out of the kitchen to the hallway so he could have some pretense at privacy. Not for his own sake. God knows the boys had watched him break down enough times today as he sat and contemplated the huge fucking mess his life had become overnight. But...this was also Kevin's moment, and he knew Kevin didn't like an audience. He wouldn't want other people witnessing this, whatever 'this' was going to turn out to be.
'Uhh...hi.' Patrick heard Kevin say quietly, and the sheer relief at hearing his voice made his stupid fucking tears start up all over again. But he didn't want Kevin to know. He didn't want Kevin feeling guilty and responsible and shitty just because he was finding it hard to keep it together.
Patrick tried to breathe through his tears silently, but Kevin knew him too fucking well.
'Christ, Patrick. Don't.' Kevin murmured, sounding dejected and weary. Fuck. That was the voice of someone who had pretty much given up.
'I want to see you. Can I see you?' Patrick rushed in, wincing as he heard the neediness in his own voice.
'Patrick...' Kevin sighed.
'I don't want to talk over the phone. I don't have that much to say but I want to say it in person. It won't take long. I promise.' Patrick pushed on. He had to see Kevin face to face. 'And then if you want you can just tell me to fuck off and I won't bother you again.' Patrick tried to laugh feebly. 'Though that's actually a lie because I won't let you tell me to fuck off without putting up a fight. Please just let me see you.' Patrick ended with a whisper, his had clenching his cell phone so tightly that he was surprised he didn't shatter it.
And then he forced himself to wait. And wait. And fucking wait.
The ball was in Kevin's court, and all Patrick could do was pray Kevin loved him more than he was mad at him. There was no doubt Kevin loved him, and that love couldn't have dissipated overnight, but there was also no doubt that Patrick had driven him over sort sort of cliff this morning with what he perceived as Patrick's betrayal. And the anger with which he'd faced Patrick as he'd taken in the hair-cut and drawn the obvious conclusion that Patrick had deserted him to go and find solace with Richie...well, that was some pretty fucking powerful stuff, and at this moment, with a whole day staying out of contact with Patrick, holed up god knows where, it was anyone's guess as to whether Kevin's anger had been stoked and fired up with hours worth of indignant contemplation, or whether he had calmed down and just missed Patrick as much as Patrick missed him.
'Ok.' Kevin eventually murmured, and Patrick's felt the relief like a physical balm. Thank fucking God. But he had to seize the moment. No time to get complacent. There was still a long road ahead of him tonight if he was going to get Kevin to give them another chance. And that was exactly what he was determined to do. Kevin had wondered if last night's fight had been to keep them together or break them up, and honestly, at that moment Patrick hadn't known either. But now, almost twenty four hours and a whole fuck of a lot of self examination and introspection and, yes, a lot of drama and tears and anger, he finally knew the answer. He was going to fight for them to be together because the alternative was unthinkable.
So now all he had to do was get Kevin on the same team. Which yesterday would have been a ridiculous thought but today...with all the hurtful words spoken and with all the doubts and mistrust Patrick had thrown at him, was not at all a done deal. Patrick had his work cut out for him and his strongest ally was going to be the fact that Kevin used to find it hard to deny him anything he wanted. That Kevin found him irresistible and moved mountains to be with him.
How had he lost sight of that yesterday? How was it possible that all he heard was Kevin not loving him enough? He'd gone into self preservation mode so quickly, forgetting that Kevin was the one that had made himself vulnerable over and over again and risked so much to be with him. Stupid fucking insecurities. He needed to get a grip on that crap. It wouldn't happen overnight, but he had to show Kevin that he was ready and willing to work on that, and that he wasn't going to let Kevin walk away any time soon.
And Patrick had a plan. A tentative one. One that needed more time to be fleshed out and thought through, but he had no more time, so it was going to have to be implemented in a half-assed way and he was just going to have to rely on the fact that Kevin loved him to get him through this.
'Can we meet now? At the office? Up on the roof? I can be there in twenty minutes. I'm at Agustin's and I'll take an Uber...' Patrick started, letting his desperation show. But...that was part of the plan.
'The office?' Kevin interrupted.
'Yeah. It's kind of like a neutral zone. And...a happy place. Where it all began, right?' Patrick didn't want to give away too much over the phone. It would be closer to meet at their apartment but Patrick didn't think they were ready quite yet to face that. So hopefully Kevin wasn't averse to traveling to the office late on a Sunday evening. He held his breath waiting.
'I'm already here. I've been here...all day.' Kevin said quietly. Oh god. Patrick hadn't thought about where Kevin might go. He'd just assumed that at some point he'd gone back to their apartment and seen that Patrick hadn't taken any of his stuff, had left everything there. He'd thought that Kevin knew Patrick had chosen not to listen to him and had obviously decided not to leave. He'd never imagined that Kevin had spent the day alone, thinking that Patrick was now gone. Fuck. Patrick's heart broke as he pictured Kevin sitting alone in his glass cube, avoiding the apartment, avoiding Patrick...
'Don't move. I'll be right there.' Patrick ordered him frantically, but no...that wasn't right. 'I mean, you should move. Go up to the roof. You can unlock it from the inside right? Wait for me in our spot, ok? I'm ordering a cab right now so I'll be there fifteen minutes tops. Don't leave, ok?'
'Patrick...' Kevin sighed loudly over the phone, and Patrick felt a new rush of panic as he heard a note of stubbornness creep into Kevin's voice.
'I'm hanging up now. Don't. Leave.' Patrick said briskly before ending the call. And within seconds he'd located an Uber car two minutes away. Good. No time to second guess or think about what he was doing.
'Paddy, what the fuck are you doing?' Agustin suddenly materialized beside Patrick in the hallway, with Dom right behind him.
'I'm doing what we discussed. I'm going after him. I'm going to cajole and bully him and supplicate myself before him, and I'm going to get him back.' Patrick explained, though he would have thought after the hours of conversations the three of them had had this afternoon it was pretty fucking obvious. It was after all a plan they'd sort of all come up with together. They probably just hadn't expected Patrick to jump in and start implementing it quite so rashly.
'Do you think seeing him now, when you're both still raw and emotional...' Dom began carefully.
'That's EXACTLY when I have to see him. We've never been about being sensible and thinking things through. We've always been about following our emotions and instincts. If either of us had taken a moment to think about it we would never have started fucking in the first place. So...this is what and who we are. Raw and emotional...and fuck it...it works when we're like that. When it's about how he feels about me and how I feel about him. It only gets fucked up when we make it about being smart and sensible. So...I'm going to wait on that. I'm going with the plan where I don't give him a chance to think about things, and I don't let him contemplate life without me. I'm going to be in his face, in his bed, I'm going to be everywhere he looks, and we'll work all this crap out together. Or...we won't. But it won't be because I let him drive me away or because I got cold feet.'
Agustin and Dom looked at him for long moments, and Patrick began to worry that they were going to wrestle him to the ground. He could probably take Agustin, though he was wiry and tenacious, but there was no way he could take Dom.
'Good luck.' Dom said eventually, and Patrick let out the breath he'd been holding.
'Go get him, tiger.' Agustin joked feebly, the worry and concern clear on his face.
Patrick smiled with what felt like the first genuine sense of relief he'd had all day. He nodded at them, and ran out of the apartment to wait for the Uber car.
He wasn't going to think about Kevin on the ride there. That would just make him panic. Or sad. Especially if he thought about Kevin being heartbroken and alone all day. Fuck...that's what Kevin had meant when he'd told Patrick that he called Agustin to make sure he was alright. When he thought that Patrick was out there somewhere feeling all the pain of the night before. How could he have just left him without a note or anything? He really was a total shit.
But he wasn't going to dwell on his own bad behavior. That was done and in the past. He'd explained to Dom and Agustin what had driven him to Richie, and at some point he was going to have to do a better job at explaining it again to Kevin, but not tonight. No mention of Richie was going to be made tonight. Agustin had been very clear on how inappropriate he felt Patrick's decision had been to turn to Richie this morning, and though Patrick didn't fully agree...no one understood the complicated feelings Richie stirred up in him...he could see how it seemed to someone on the outside of their relationship.
Dom had been trying to comfort a clearly distraught Patrick, not wanting to cause him any more distress after Patrick had told them about Kevin's 'fucking other people' bombshell, but Agustin wouldn't let it go. He pushed Patrick to justify why Richie had seemed the natural choice of a friend this morning, and eventually Patrick had broken down and blurted out what seemed so very obvious in his head
'He's uncomplicated, alright?' Patrick had practically shouted at Agustin. 'He's straightforward. It's all simple,it's all black and white. There's no fucking grey with Richie, OK? There's right, and there's wrong, and he's not like you Agustin. Ok? He wouldn't have threesomes with his boyfriend and hire hookers, and he wouldn't think it's natural to cheat. And he's not like you Dom either! He doesn't fuck around with anything that moves, he wouldn't want open relationships...he's just a simple fucking guy who wants simple fucking things and what's so wrong with that? What's so wrong with being old-fashioned and just wanting to be with the person you're devoted to and love, and wanting to be everything to them? What's wrongwith WANTING THAT?'
And all the despair and all the anger and fear of the night before had come crashing down on him again and he'd felt his heart shrinking as he remembered standing with Kevin in the parking lot, telling Kevin that he'd always feel like he wasn't enough, and that he'd always mistrust Kevin from this moment on.
Agustin must have been worried at the fresh flood of tears because he'd immediately moved to comfort Patrick, and Dom, dear faithful, stoic Dom had tried to make sense of it again.
'There's nothing wrong with wanting that.' Dom had reassured Patrick. 'And you're right to let Kevin know. But...you said Kevin's OK with that, right, and that he said that he would do that for you? And...you said you trust him right? So...when you saw Richie, what did you want Richie to say? Did you want him to...like...give his blessing?'
Patrick had shaken his head wearily.
'I didn't even tell him about the fight. I just wanted to be with someone who I felt would understand me, who would be on my side.' Patrick said quietly. And that had bothered Agustin and got him riled up all over again.
'Jesus, Paddy, WE are on your side.' He'd exclaimed. 'But what the fuck did you think Kevin would do once he found out that you left him sleeping and went to see your saintly ex-boyfriend? How would you feel if you woke up and found out he'd gone to hang out with Jon.'
'Well, I think that's a little different...' Dom had tried to interrupt, ever the peace-maker.
'I know it's different but it's also the same, right?' Agustin kept on, ignoring Dom's attempt to divert them off this subject. 'You both left your boyfriends to be with each other, so don't you kind of have to REALLY leave them and not keep bringing them back into your lives?' Agustin asked intently.
'Richie is my FRIEND!' Patrick tried once more. But Agustin was not convinced.
'I don't think you can call him your friend and then compare your boyfriend to him Paddy. I don't think that's how it works. I don't think you'd say 'I love Kevin, but...Dom is a really good guy', would you?' Agustin said simply.
'Paddy?' Dom tentatively broke the awkward silence. 'Do you see what Agustin is saying?'
And Patrick sort of did. Saw how it looked like from the outside. How it must have looked to Kevin. And he was suddenly very very scared.
'Fuck.' Patrick whispered, looking dazedly at his two best friends. 'What have I done?'
Only a few minutes later, after Patrick had explained to them for what he hoped was the final time that he was no longer in love with Richie, Dom had come straight to the point.
'So...what now, Paddy?' He'd asked simply.
'Fuck me if I know.' Patrick had sighed, realizing that the hardest part of his relationship with Kevin was about to start. 'It's going to be complicated with Kevin, and we've both got baggage, and I feel like my head's going to explode at all the fucking grey areas that I'm going to be living with...but...I love him.' Patrick shrugged his shoulders, bemused, bewildered. It was so simple and yet so very very complicated. 'I don't want to be without him, and I don't know how to make him take me back, but I'm going to have to...try.' He ended, and they'd all sat there silently contemplating the mess Patrick was facing.
Eventually they'd rallied though. And that's when the beginnings of the half-assed plan had been made. It was all about laying himself at Kevin's mercy. Showing Kevin that Patrick was vulnerable to him, loved him, was willing to risk getting hurt and heart-broken, because Kevin was worth it. Showing Kevin he was ready to chase after him and wrestle him to the floor and make him take Patrick back because the alternative wasn't really an option.
And since Kevin was a competitive, game-loving freak, Patrick was going to challenge him to a contest. One Kevin had pretty much decided in his own head he'd already won, but which would hopefully give Patrick an opportunity to let Kevin see how invested in this relationship he was.
Because Kevin had a theory, one which admittedly may appear on the surface to have some truth to it, but it hadn't totally been proven yet, and Patrick hoped to be able to show him there were some basic fundamentals flaws in the theory. The theory that Patrick was always ready to walk away and was always looking for a chance to escape. The theory that Kevin always pushed and initiated and fought for them, while Patrick had one foot out of the door.
Patrick knew he had to prove to Kevin that he was committed. All the other stuff could wait. Had to wait. But to prove anything to Kevin that disagreed with his own point of view meant he had to overcome kevin's stubbornness. His belief that he was always right. Patrick sighed as he contemplated just how ridiculous the notion of challenging Kevin to a game was, but after almost two days of constant drama and tension and fear and distress, he didn't think either of them were going to be able to take too much more intensity.
Still, as Patrick walked up to the MDG roof top, his heart started hammering and he felt the instinct to abandon his silly plan and just prostrate himself at Kevin's feet and beg him to just rewind the clock and set them both back to Saturday morning so they could pretend none of this had ever happened. How perfect would that be?
Patrick walked out onto the roof and stopped dead as he saw Kevin sitting on their wall, watching him.
'Hello.' Patrick said quietly. Genius. What an opening.
'Hello.' Kevin replied, with what seemed to be a total lack of emotion. Shit. He'd had time to shore up his defenses. He was watching Patrick with what seemed like complete disinterest as he walked up and sat next to Kevin on the wall. Not close enough for them to be touching, but close enough that he could read Kevin's expression in the darkness of the night.
'Thanks for meeting me here.' Patrick tried to buy himself some time. 'I didn't know if we would be able to get up here at night on a weekend.'
'Perks of being the boss.' Kevin said simply.
'Right.' Patrick chuckled nervously.
Kevin turned his head away, looking out into the darkness surrounding them, and Patrick looked inside himself for the courage he needed to start the conversation he'd played over in his mind. Fuck it. If he waited for an encouraging opening from Kevin they'd never get started.
'Do you...' Patrick cleared his throat, hearing his voice come out tentative and anxious. 'Do you remember the first time you came up on the roof? The first time you found it?' He finally managed to make the opening gambit of his plan.
'I remember.' Kevin answered, with still no sign of encouragement.
'It was the day after...you know...Megan's wedding and...uhm...you...' Patrick tried to soldier on.
'Patrick, I said, I remember.' Kevin cut him off shortly.
'Ok, yeah.' Patrick felt chastened. Still, he couldn't let Kevin put him off like this. He knew Kevin would be hard to crack, but he also knew there must still be some really deep feelings left and he just had to rekindle them, make Kevin feel them, make Kevin want them...
'It, it was...just...it was I think, it was maybe one of those times that you...' Patrick attempted once more to engage him.
'That I what?' Now Kevin had turned to glare at him and Patrick knew he had touched a nerve. Good.
'I think it's one of the times that you count as chasing after me, right?' he blurted out quickly.
Kevin turned away from him again silently. But Patrick had a lot more to say and perversely Kevin's cold attitude made him suddenly feel just a little more confident that he was on the right track.
'It's just that if I could have us have this conversation somewhere else I would have loved to have it on that Naval Destroyer, but I don't think you could pull that off, right?' Patrick laughed nervously.
Now THAT obviously wasn't what Kevin was expecting. He turned and stared at Patrick, confused.
'What the fuck are you talking about?' Kevin asked, and for the first time there was a flicker of emotion coming through in his voice.
'No, it's just that, you said you were always chasing me and I just wanted to remind you that I was the one who chased you first, right? Remember? When I tried to hook up with you while sitting on that torpedo?' Patrick pressed on gamely, feeling more and more sure of himself.
Kevin just stared at him, but there seemed to be a growing awareness in him that Patrick was not here to rehash the conversation about the state of their relationship. And Kevin was, hopefully, begrudgingly intrigued.
'Right?' Patrick continued, taking advantage of Kevin's temporary surprise. 'So I've been counting and it's kind of like a game where I've been sort of...like...assigning points and stuff...cos...we both like games right? And we both like to win?'
'Are you serious?' Kevin asked, as Patrick paused to let his words sink in.
'Just hear me out, OK? You'll understand the game soon, and then we can just figure out who has the most points and who wins.' Patrick said patronizingly, knowing that would piss Kevin off and get him engaged like nothing else could.
'The most...points.' Kevin repeated flatly. But at least he was now fully turned towards Patrick and seemed to be hanging on every word he said. That was a huge improvement already.
'Yes!' Patrick exclaimed, as if Kevin was being aggravatingly slow. 'So the torpedo thing, that's got to be...like...at LEAST a 10, cos..I mean...come on. That was a total epic pass. I asked my fricking boss out while straddling a torpedo! Who does that...right?' Patrick laughed, and it only sounded a very tiny bit nervous.
'Points, Patrick?' Kevin wouldn't let that bit go. But Patrick just ignored him.
'So I have 10, and then you get 5 for the wedding, cos everybody does stupid stuff at a wedding so it's not...particularly original. Right?' Patrick forged on.
'Patrick...' Kevin sighed weakly, and suddenly he clamped his jaw shut as if he had to physically stop himself from saying anything more, as if he was willing himself not to give in, and all the hurt he felt was just written so clearly in his eyes... and just like that, Patrick lost his will to continue the silly game. It was just supposed to be something to get them talking and remembering happier times, and specifically times where Patrick had shown that he was just as much into them happening as Kevin had ever been. But he couldn't keep joking and teasing in the face of Kevin's overwhelming sadness.
'No listen...just...I'm not making fun, or making a joke, or pretending it's not important...' Patrick said urgently, closing the distance between them on the wall just a tiny bit. Wanting to feel Kevin's presence and wanting Kevin to feel his.
'I just want you to know that...that...I listened to what you said. Ok. I listened to every word and I've really been thinking about it, about everything, and I want you to know that the only reason I didn't chase you or beg you was that you weren't...available.' Patrick had paused as he searched for the right word. And still Kevin said nothing. Just looked at him. So Patrick went on. 'But I still wanted to. I still wanted to be with you, and I spent my weekends here at work with you, and it's not as if I even tried to stop you in the office that night, right?' Patrick willed Kevin to remember. 'And yes, you had to make the moves, but, you were with Jon and I really, REALLY wished from that very first moment I saw you on that boat, that you weren't and that you could be with me instead.' He finished, and he prayed to whatever god might happen to be listening that Kevin understood what he was trying to do. And that it would be enough to get Kevin to rethink his theory. The theory that really could kill their relationship dead if Kevin wouldn't let himself doubt it.
'Patrick...' Kevin sighed heavily. 'It's not just about that.'
'I know. I know.' Patrick jumped in quickly. He didn't want them to go there. Nothing good lay in going there tonight. 'There's a whole lot of stuff that we have to clear up, but it's a start right?' Patrick asked hopefully. 'And...to me it's really important because...it sounded like you just didn't believe I love you, and that...well that fucking breaks my heart Kevin. Because I do.' Patrick said as intently, as earnestly as he possibly could. 'I really love you. And I want you to know that.' He emphasized, willing Kevin to believe him.
Kevin looked away and bit his lip as tears start to form in his eyes. Patrick wanted to reach out and take him in his arms at the sight of those tears, but...he hadn't been invited...yet. Eventually Kevin shook his head, and Patrick prepared himself.
'Patrick...'
'No, don't say anything now ok. It's my turn to talk, and you have to just listen for a moment. Ok?' Patrick interrupted Kevin. This was not the time for logic and reasoning. This was the time for instinct and all of his were telling him to just steamroll the fuck right over any and all sensible objections Kevin might have.
Kevin nodded his head, a little take aback at Patrick's take-charge attitude. He was probably expecting a more tearful and shaken Patrick. Who could blame him. But that's not the Patrick that had shown up tonight, thank God.
'I think we both said some really...fuck...some really hurtful things, and we both pulled away, but...I'm not giving up, OK?' Patrick laid his cards on the table. 'I know right now you think you want me to leave, but I'm not going to.' He stated simply. Kevin still hadn't turned to look at him, but he also hadn't moved away or stormed off. That was a good sign, so Patrick continued. 'I'm not moving my stuff out. I'm not taking my toothbrush back...tonight I'm going to stay at Agustin's place, and tomorrow we can have our first proper moving in day. Ok?' And having used his most 'don't fuck with me' tone, Patrick reached out to take Kevin's hand, and, hallelujah, Kevin let him.
'Ok?' Patrick pushed insistently 'Kevin?' Patrick waited a moment. 'Hey, you can talk now...if you have anything... to say.'
Kevin still stared ahead, but his hand lay in Patrick's, and Patrick squeezed it gently. That seemed to spark something in Kevin finally.
'I'm not sure I can hold it together for you and me both, this time, Patrick.' Kevin murmured, and Patrick had to strain to hear his quiet voice. He still sounded heart-broken, but at least he was talking. And the hand-holding...well Patrick was taking that as the most positive sign of the night. Even if the words Kevin was saying were less than encouraging. 'If you...if you go off on a freak out, I'm just not in a place where I can handle that right now. I feel like I've lost everything and I feel like I've just been gutted and I feel hollow and I feel like I'm losing my fucking mind...' Kevin continued, and Patrick had to steel himself from losing his own shit as he heard Kevin confess to the most deep and horrible of suffering. But this wasn't the time for weakness. This is where he had to prove himself to Kevin.
'Shhhh...shhhh.' Patrick said soothingly, and finally allowed himself to take hold of Kevin's shoulders and turn him so they were facing each other. 'Listen to me.' Patrick said, the resolve and certainty clear in his tone. 'You don't have to handle anything, OK?' Patrick shook Kevin lightly as Kevin looked down at the wall between them. 'Look at me.' He ordered Kevin. 'I'm totally bad-ass right now. I'm fucking superman. I can do it for both of us, I swear. If it's your turn to freak out, I'll be the one holding us together. OK?' Patrick pressed. Kevin was looking at him as he'd been ordered to, and the struggle to stop himself from believing Patrick and hoping it could be true was so clear in his eyes. Patrick had to press his advantage. 'Kevin...just say OK.' He told him.
'Maybe it's just too fast...' Kevin tried once again to bring logic into the conversation. No fucking way.
'Compared to what?' Patrick broke in quickly.
'What do you mean?' Kevin asked, confused.
'Too fast compared to what? To whom?' Patrick asked matter-of-factly. 'It's not like we've done anything else the normal way, right?' He smiled at Kevin. A genuine smile. One of the first he'd had in two fucking days. 'I mean, how long have we even been in this relationship? Do we count the time from when I first asked you out, or from when we first kissed, or when we first fell in love?' God...how bittersweet those days were. 'I don't even know when that was for you but for me, I think I knew the day you danced for me. Remember that?' Patrick asked. And miracle of miracles...Kevin laughed. A little weakly, but it was a real laugh.
'Jesus.' Kevin rolled his eyes. 'You were so fucking freaked out, I should have known then how much hard work you'd be.'
'You love it, you liar.' Patrick laughed, leaning towards Kevin as Kevin gravitated towards him too. 'You love telling me to calm down, to stop talking, to stop freaking out...'
They smiled at each other, lost in memories of their crazy little love story. Then Kevin turned serious.
'We've got a lot of stuff to work out Patrick.' He said solemnly.
'I know.' Patrick replied quietly, putting his hand up to stroke Kevin's head. God, it felt so fucking good to be able to touch him again. He ran his hand down Kevin's arm and rubbed his fingers over Kevin's clenched fist. Ok. He would address the elephant in the room briefly, but he wan't going to let them wallow. 'There's a list in my head of a whole bunch of topics that we have to talk about, and we will, but you know what? Tonight? No more talking.' Patrick stated simply, leaving no room for argument. 'I'm exhausted and I'm going to crash at Agustin's.'
And again, not leaving Kevin any opportunity to disagree or discuss, he told Kevin exactly what was going to happen next. 'And tomorrow morning you'll call MDG and tell them the boss and his boyfriend are taking a couple of days off, and you can cook me a crazy breakfast to start the day when I come over in the morning, and then I'll cook you dinner in our kitchen, I'll make you my Mac n cheese that you love, and then we can just...be together...in our home, and we can do...whatever we want. You just have to say...OK.'
Patrick waited breathlessly for Kevin's response, though he could see from the softening in his eyes and the small smile that had started forming again on those lips that he wanted to kiss and bite and feast on, that Kevin was pretty much on board. Still...it would be nice to hear him say it.
Kevin leaned in to touch his forehead against Patrick's, and Patrick felt a beautiful moment of peace.
'OK.' Kevin whispered.
Patrick sighed deeply, and then decided he needed to push it just a little bit further. He was probably asking for too much but...
'Can I ask one more thing?' He murmured tentatively.
'You can ask anything you want.' Kevin said, with just a hint of bewildered resignation in his voice. That made Patrick smile again.
'Can I kiss you?' He asked Kevin quietly. 'I really want to kiss you.' He added, as if by explanation.
Kevin smiled and blinked back fresh tears. Fuck. How could he be breaking Patrick's heart and making his cock hard at the same time?
'It would be my total fucking pleasure, Patrick Murray, if you were to kiss the fucking shit out of me.' Kevin answered, without the hint of a laugh.
Patrick leaned in to kiss Kevin but stopped an inch away. Kevin's eyes widened as he waited for whatever sweet and tender thing he thought Patrick had to say.
'You know this gets me at least 1000 points, right? I might even be ahead right now...' Patrick whispered lovingly, and Kevin laughed.
So Patrick shut him up by kissing him. And the wonder that was kissing Kevin almost overwhelmed him, but he wouldn't let it. He didn't want to miss a minute of this. Their second re-union kiss. Soft, gentle, tentative to start with. Simple nibbling kisses, just the lightest of touches of lips on lips. A way to remember the delicious taste, the scent that was the essence of Kevin...and then a few bites. Still gentle, because they were both bruised and Patrick wanted to handle him with care, but it was getting harder to remember to do that. Because Kevin was licking at Patrick's lips with his tongue, and Patrick always felt that was really HIS thing and Kevin shouldn't be allowed to appropriate that move, so Patrick gave up on the gentle handling, and kissed the shit out of Kevin the way he wanted to. And with his tongue in Kevin's mouth, feeding off his lips, licking inside and lapping up all the taste that was Kevin, and with his hands gripping Kevin's head to keep it angled the way he wanted it, Patrick felt that all was right with the world at this exact minute.
And tomorrow they got to start all over again. Thank. Fucking. God.