Chapter Forty-Five

Sitting on a stool at the kitchen cabinet, Trapper propped an elbow on the counter and rested his chin in his hand. "Can I do something to help?"

"How are you with salads?" she asked without turning around.

He jumped up off the stool and headed for the refrigerator. "Instead of telling you, why don't I just show you? What do you have in here?"

"There's spinach and some other greens, carrots, gorgonzola cheese, and a champagne vinaigrette dressing. And on the counter on the other side, you'll find pecans and dried cranberries. No wait. The nuts are still out on the deck."

Walking out to the deck, he retrieved the nuts and came back. "Bowl?"

"In the cabinet right in front of you."

"And a knife?"

"Drawer," she said, pointing.

A mist had surrounded the lake in the early evening, making the sunset appear in muted colors; pinks and mauves fading to slate blue along the fringes of the lake and enshrouding the mountains that surrounded it. It was the perfect backdrop for dinner by candlelight. Leah had prepared salmon croquettes from leftover salmon along with a homemade asparagus risotto that rivaled Antonio's and Trapper's dark greens salad. As Trapper poured white wine into two glasses, he smiled at the sound of the lake water lapping at the boulders protruding here and there from the lake near the shore. It was a peaceful sound. He could understand why she chose to come here.

"I thought your house was at Fallen Leaf Lake. No one seemed to know about this one."

"This was the first property we bought here. We used it for several years for ourselves, but then bought the house on Fallen Leaf Lake because it was quieter there. Motorized boats aren't allowed on that lake. When we moved, this one became a vacation rental." She took a bite of a salmon cake. "I always liked this one more. John preferred the other house. Anyway, I had the management company cancel all the future rentals. They'll be offering the other house for rent as soon as it's ready. The auction company that's cleaning out the LA house will also clear the Fallen Leaf Lake house, and then it will be furnished for a rental. Some of that stuff will come over here…antiques from the area that I wouldn't want to disappear."

"So you're keeping this one for yourself. Are you going to have time to use it?"

She set her fork on her plate, and reached for her wine glass. "This will be my home if I choose to be among the ranks of the unemployed," she said sadly. "And if I return to work, it will remain my private vacation home…not to be rented. If I'm not supposed to work all the time, I should have some time to enjoy it."

"It doesn't sound like you want to stay unemployed." His plate cleared, he moved his wine glass next to hers, and then moved his chair, sitting and draping his arm across the back of hers. "What would you do with yourself?"

Leaning back underneath his arm, she smiled when he moved his hand down to her shoulder. "Believe it or not, I did quite a few things when the children were small. I worked part-time for awhile when they were babies, and I quilted and embroidered. I was very health conscious, so I had a vegetable garden and canned."

"In LA?"

"The house sits on a half acre. I had plenty of room."

Trapper's look had slowly turned skeptical. "Did you raise chickens for fresh eggs and milk the cow every morning?" She smirked and turned away, bringing forth a high-pitched laugh from him.

"I'm glad I amuse you," she said as she rose from her chair and began to gather the dinner dishes.

"Wait a minute," he said, back-peddling. She left for the kitchen. "Come back here!" he called, turning in his chair. When he realized she wasn't going to stop, he went after her.

Giving him an incensed look, she turned her back to him to load the dishwasher. "Is it so hard to believe that I can do things other than build computer systems?"

He brought over the serving dishes. "Well, you play the guitar quite well," he said with a grin.

"That doesn't count. Music and computers…"

"I know…go hand in hand," he finished, raising his hands defensively. "I was only kidding about the chickens and cow." She snickered, and he leaned over her shoulder. "I heard that." Closing the dishwasher, he took her hand and drew her into him. "When are you going to call your company?"

She pushed, but he didn't let go. He glared down upon her with raised eyebrows.

"I can't call now. No one is there."

"You can call now. Your boss is waiting for a call…'anytime', he said. He just wants to hear from you."

When she dropped her forehead on his chest, his hands went to her arms. "Leah, it wasn't my intention to make this harder for you. But you're not the same person you were when I first met you, and you can't afford to go back to that. You have every right to define the difference between your right and your wrong. If that's what you need to go back, fight for it." She sighed and looked up, glancing into his eyes before she looked beyond him, questioning in her mind if it was worth the fight. She could walk away easily enough, but did she really want to? Trapper reached for the cordless phone, holding it out to her. "I'll finish cleaning up while you call."

Reluctantly, she took the phone and walked back out to the deck as Trapper looked on. She stood at the rail, considering the phone, then dialed. Waiting for an answer, she looked out over the lake at the sliver of moon that had just begun to rise over the far mountains, and just as she was about to hang up, she heard a 'hello.'

"Doug, it's Leah. I'm fine. I'm in South Lake Tahoe." Sagging on the railing, she inhaled deeply at the distress in his voice. "I know it was short notice. I had intended to follow it up with a formal letter, but…too many people have been trying to change my mind. Yes, I know…you, too. Leave of absence? No, I don't want leave. I just had leave. Doug, it doesn't matter that it was medical. I'm ready to go back to work…with a couple of changes." She straightened. "Really? Well, I want to be able to push back while we're discussing requirements and specifications. If I think they're making a bad decision, I want the autonomy to delay the project until I can get some agreement on major points. He did? Mr. Slocum wasn't really the one who objected. It just seemed no one else on the board wanted to be bothered with it."

"Leah, you can have whatever you need. You've been successful at this long enough for me to trust your judgment," said Doug. "I would love to have you oversee all the related industry projects."

"No. I don't want that. I need to be close to the work. And I'd like to be more stable. I need to be able to call somewhere home."

"All right. Finish up what you've started, and then we'll discuss your choices for your next assignment…before you are assigned. Fair?"

"Fair enough. There's one more thing. Mark Hansen is ready to work without a net. He needs his own team."

"He doesn't want one."

She held her breath for a moment. She never thought he'd turn down a promotion. "I don't understand. He's been with me for fourteen or fifteen years. He's ready."

"He said he'd only stay at San Francisco Memorial If you came back."

"You don't understand, Doug. I don't think I can work with him anymore."

"The two of you are the best team I have. Do you realize that you as the architect and Mark as the technical lead are more successful than any other team in the company? You just need to keep it on a business level and convince him to do the same. I think if you tell him he doesn't have a choice if he wants to stay with the company, he'll bite." When Doug didn't hear an answer, he asked, "Or has it become personal for both of you?"

"He's always been a friend, Doug…ever since we left college."

"He's always felt the same way, Leah, even when you were married to John."

"How do you know that?"

"Because he came to me back then, wanting to move to another team. I told him to deal with it, and he did."

"Until now."

"No. He'll go back to dealing with it. John was in his way before. Now as I understand it, Dr. McIntyre is in his way."

She scowled. "How do you know about that?"

"It pays to know what's happening with your employees, Leah. Don't worry how I know. Just remember that I do. Now, when will you be back?" There was silence on the line. "Oh, come now. Don't tell me you're thinking about it again."

"In a few days. I'll call you when I'm back."

"Good enough. I'll talk to you then."

Leaning on the door frame, Trapper had heard most of her side of the conversation. "Does that mean we have a few days?"

She turned, but didn't look at him, rather she twisted her mouth with a thoughtful air. "He said he knew about you."

"Me? What does he know about me?"

"He didn't say, but he referred to you in almost the same light as John. I don't know if I'm comfortable with that."

"What does it matter if he knows about me…us, if that's what you mean?"

"He's spying on me…he's intruding in my personal life, and he has no right to do that. I don't know if I want to work for him." Taking her face in his hands, he kissed her, lingering a moment before he moved back. He said nothing, but smiled. Raising a suspicious eyebrow, she asked, "What was that for?"

"Why don't we stop talking about work? We'll deal with it when we get back. Right now, I have a few days off that the hospital owes me, and I'd like to spend it relaxing…with you." Cocking his head, he looked sideways at her. "Of course, if that's all right with you."

"Unless you want to go to a casino, bar or restaurant, there isn't much to do around here at night."

"I see a beach bathed in moonlight." Taking her hand, Trapper headed for the steps leading to a walkway that meandered toward the water's edge. When they walked out onto the beach, he moved his arm around her. They walked silently down the beach until they turned back toward the house. "Do you really have any idea what you want?"

"You were right. I need to work. I wouldn't be happy quilting or knitting all day. And I have to admit…these last few weeks I've enjoyed life out of the basement." She stopped walking and turned to face him. "How did you know? I've been a project for you from the very first day, haven't I?"

Looking over her head, he smiled and pulled her against him. "How do I say this without getting myself into trouble?"

"The truth would be nice," she said, moving her arms around him.

"Hm. Yes, well, in the beginning, maybe. Once I found you were a heart patient, you weren't a project. You were a patient, and then somewhere in there…sometime after Sandler took over your case, it all changed."

She looked him in the eye. "What am I now?"

Caressing her cheek, he bent his head, and held her tightly as he gave her a fiery kiss. "Does that answer your question?" She dropped her gaze and shivered. "Are you cold?" When she didn't answer, he turned her toward the house. "Let's get you inside."

Trapper closed and locked the French door behind him while Leah went to lock the front door. He followed her up the stairs and stopped at his bedroom door, but she took his hand and led him down the hall to her room. "Leah, I came here because you disappeared, and I was worried. I didn't come with any expectations."

"Trapper," she whispered as she rose on her toes to touch his lips with hers. "If I never do this, I'll never know." Reacting to her kiss and the warmth of her sweet breath on his face, he moved his arms around her, lifting her and carrying her into the bedroom.

No words were necessary the rest of the night, their passion spoken with their eyes, their mouths, their caresses, the insecurity of her scars allayed by his tender kisses. As the moon shone through the open glass doors, the sheer curtains rose, fell and fluttered in the crisp breeze, casting vague, undulating slivers of light and shadow that moved in time with their bodies.