The dangers of Smoking.
The dangers of smoking are widely known, by smokers and non smokers alike. Detective Sergeant James Hathaway knows them, accepts them and lives with them. Except one. No one thought to warn about that one did they?
Chapter 19
James didn't even open his eyes as his mobile shrilled at him, he took it out of his pocket and answered it.
"Hello" he said.
"James?" this time his eyes opened "It's Evie"
"Oh" he rubbed at his eyes, the painkillers weren't working, he tried to remember where he'd left them to take some more "Hello"
"I just rang...to see how you're feeling" she explained.
"Lonely" it was out of his mouth before he realised. Maybe he was concussed he considered.
"Ah...Oh" she faltered and he could picture her blinking, deciding what to say next "Are you on your own?"
"Isn't that the definition of lonely?" he replied.
"Not really" she said "You can be lonely in a crowded room if the right person...people I mean, aren't there"
"That is true" he conceded.
"Is the dressing OK?" she asked "No more bleeding?"
"No" he replied "It's fine. Though if it was bleeding, would you come and fix it?"
He heard her laugh slightly, imagining her cheeks pinking at his question "Well, if you wanted me to"
"It's bleeding then" he replied, sitting up and looking at his living room in slight panic, it was a mess.
"You just said..." she sounded confused and then he heard the swift intake of breath as she worked it out, and then laughter, maybe he didn't need more painkillers after all, he was feeling better already.
"So are you coming over to make sure I'm not bleeding to death?" he asked.
"Yes" she replied "If you want me to"
"I do" he smiled and gave her the address "See you soon"
…...
James set his plate down and looked at Evie "Is that some kind of nursing 6th sense?" he asked "Knowing when one of your patients hasn't eaten?"
"No" she replied with a smile "That's my mothers influence, you bring sick people food, especially single men, they don't eat properly at the best of times"
"I'd like not to be" he rested his head back against the sofa and she turned to face him, bringing her knees up under her chin and wrapping the cardigan she wore around them.
"No one likes being injured" she said with a smile "And hungry"
"They don't" he agreed "But I meant single"
Colour flooded her face, as did his "I'm having second thoughts about that concussion" she murmured.
He gave an awkward laugh "Do you like being single?" he asked.
"Not all the time" She admitted.
He gave her an apprehensive smile and then shuffled closer, she extended her legs and he laid his head in her lap.
"Can we be single together then?" he asked, may as well be hung for a sheep as a lamb, he thought.
She stroked his hair gently, avoiding the cut "I think maybe we could"
He gave a contented sigh and closed his eyes, sinking into the comfort.
"Does that mean" he asked "That I have my own personal nurse now?"
She chuckled quietly "If you need one, though mention bed baths and I'll have to reconsider"
He smiled "I'll try not to" he said "Were you a general nurse before you trained in mental health?"
"Yes" she answered "It's all changed now, but when I trained, you did 2 years general nursing and then a year in your chosen field, and my medical skills were kept pretty well honed with some of the patients we had, they managed to injure themselves in all sorts of inventive ways"
"Will you ever go back to it?" he asked.
He felt her tense, the hand in his hair stopped moving and he opened his eyes, it had been an innocent question.
"I doubt it" she said.
"Sorry" he muttered, concern on his face.
"It's fine" the hand moved again, but her expression didn't change, she looked far away, and not happy with where she was.
She looked down and saw him looking at her, concern in his eyes.
"I may go back to general nursing" she said "But never mental health"
"That's reasonable" he replied.
"How much do you know?" she asked quietly "About what happened?"
"Next to nothing" he admitted "Only what Lewis told me and what I remember from the press coverage at the time"
"Which is?"
"That a patient was released, and shouldn't have been. He attacked you, you defended yourself and he died. Because the doctor in charge should never have released him because he was unstable, there was an enquiry. That and what you told me about him being delusional" he answered with his usual accuracy of facts.
"He wasn't the only one that was delusional" she sighed.
"Oh?" James tried to keep any pressure out of his voice, if she wanted to tell him, then she would.
"The doctor in charge...he knew about Jonny's violent history. Chose to keep it to himself" she said, her voice was flat "Had I known, I would have taken it higher when it became apparent that things were getting out of hand, instead of leaving it"
"Jonny was the patient?"
"Yes" she nodded, she still had her fingers in his hair, but they were now still "He was part of a new trial of lowering medication and talking therapy. It wasn't working for him, but Marcus...Dr Gedge, he didn't want to know. One failed patient could have jeopardised the whole trial, and as it turned out, he loved that more than anything else, even me"
James waited for her to light a cigarette, lighting one himself, she continued.
"I reported him to the GMC, and he ended our relationship, I was devastated. But by this time, Jonny was awol. Then he turned up, at my flat and well, I woke up in hospital. Gedge was held accountable, and sent to prison for what he did. Jonny could have been helped but he wasn't and I was almost killed. I made my peace with what happened, but sometimes, I think I'm as guilty as him"
"You trusted someone who was supposed to love you" James said quietly, he was furious with this man, the one he didn't even know, for putting her in such a position of harm, but he didn't show it, it wouldn't help "There's no crime in that"
She suddenly roused herself and smiled at him "Well, you're the expert" she said "But I must say, you'd have made a good priest, getting people to talk like that"
He laughed, sitting up "Shame it doesn't work on criminals"
"Oh I'm sure you can charm them into confessions" she replied.
He realised that she had closed the subject and respected that, she had told him herself, without being asked, and that stirred up some unsettling emotions about his own feelings, but not necessarily bad ones.
"You look tired" he said "Would you like to stay?"
"Yes"
She followed him to the bedroom and he put a lamp on, she watched as he retreated to the door, and gave him a questioning look.
He nodded, and closed the door, drawing back the covers and settling with her head on his chest. Just before he slept he realised that his head wasn't aching, and that maybe, he wasn't single any more.